The Right Fit

"Come on Zel you can't seriously consider wearing the same clothes," Lina huffs in exasperation. Considering what he endured yesterday, he's taking the new change in gender rather well. Aside from the extra baggage between his legs he isn't any different than he was the day before. He's still an arrogant, temperamental, big eater who is more than generous with his opinion. "You're a girl now."

Zelgadis is less than pleased to receive said opinion, which again is no surprise. She doesn't immediately respond and looks up at the redhead man dispassionately. Its strange being forced to look up at Lina and she doesn't particularly enjoy it. "It might be a little big, but I can easily take it in," she replies dryly.

After sleeping off the shock of what happened at the tavern, the Slayers are forced to live with the consequences of the old sorcerer's curse. Never one to let something like a curse get him down, Lina immediately decides that the first order of business is buying more appropriate clothing. While practical, the idea is received by Gourry and Zelgadis with minimal enthusiasm. In fact Lina is the only one really thrilled with the idea of shopping.

So far the only one who's bought anything at this particular shop is Lina. He is wearing his usual burgundy, with a new pair of matching gloves, boots, and cape. Gourry has tried a few things on, but she hasn't deciding on anything claiming that nothing feel's right. At least the tall blond woman is trying while Zelgadis has made minimal effort to find anything she might be interested in.

"And when you turn back to normal you think you'll be able to tailor it again to fit a bigger person, hmm?" Lina asks, his left eyebrow rising incredulously.

Crossing her arms, Zelgadis glances away, but doesn't argue knowing full well Lina is right. For a while she just stands their stubbornly with Lina staring down at her until finally Zelgadis seemingly breaks. "Fine," she throws her arms down into fist before grabbing Gourry's arm and pulling her to his side. "But you're paying for our clothing!"

Dead silence.

"WHAT?!" Lina cries in outrage. "Why do I have to pay for your clothes!"

"Because this whole thing is your fault," Zelgadis answers, a familiar grin twisting her blue lips. "You're the man now so you have to take responsibility."

Lina's mouth falls open, shocked to hear such a thing coming from Zelgadis's mouth instead of his own.

Out of the loop, Gourry scratches the back of her head as she contemplates what Zelgadis is saying. She is still attached to Zelgadis, who has a strong hold on her arm but she doesn't particularly mind. Finally her face lights up and she faces Lina eagerly. "Wow your paying?" she says. "Aww Lina, that's really nice of you."

Without thinking Lina's fist flies back, ready to deck the dumb blond, but his hand stops inches from his target when Zelgadis catches it. "I wouldn't do that if I were you Lina," she says with dark satisfaction.

"And why ever not?!" Lina barks.

Zelgadis only has to peak around at the other shoppers for Lina to get the picture. Most of the shoppers are women and they are glaring daggers at the man for raising a hand against a woman. Going pale, Lina drops his fist and stands erect. "Hey, uh, heh nothing to see here," Lina raises his hand to placate his small aggressive audience. Never underestimate a wild band of shopping woman.

"Was he going to hit that woman," someone whisper to her companion.

"Why would he hit such a pretty thing?" another huffs.

Before Lina can get angry at the customers for whispering behind his back, Zelgadis speaks up. "Oh, you noticed a bug in Gourry's hair, so nice of you to notice," she reaches to the side of the blonds face and flicks at her bangs. "You really were thoughtful to notice Lina."

"But Zel, there wasn't a bug in my hair," Gourry whispers into Zelgadis's tapered ear.

"I know, but you're doing Lina a favor if you pretend there was and thank her," Zelgadis calmly explains.

In a strange moment of wisdom the young woman takes in the stiff atmosphere and agrees. "Hmm, I suppose you're right," Gourry stands up to her full height and pats Lina on the shoulder. "Thanks Lina."

With his fists clenched and face burning as red as his long hair, Lina cannot bring himself to answer. It has been a long time since he was out witted by someone, especially Zelgadis.

Around them the other customers relax and return to their shopping. They are still concerned by the alarming event, but decide it's best to ignore the strange travelers for the time being.

"Again, it's really nice of you to buy us some clothes," Zelgadis continues smugly. "Very responsible."

At first Zelgadis is rather proud of her ability to turn the tables on Lina, but her confidence wavers when a calm smile steadily replaces Lina's rigid fury. Before she can get away, Lina reaches his arms around the women, one over each of their shoulders. "That's right, I'm going to buy your clothes so it's only right I help you find what you need," Lina beams.

"Oh good, I'm not sure what to get," Gourry says brightly, while Zelgadis squirms a little under Lina's arm.

"Mmm hmm," Lina nods sagely as he walks them to the section of the shop Gourry and Zelgadis have been avoiding up till now. Releasing a fear frozen Gourry, since Zelgadis is about to run from under his arm, Lina reaches forward and plucks one of the garments off the shelf. "I do believe you're both going to need some of these."

In his hand he dangles a beautiful lacy bra.

A second later Gourry tries to bolt, but Lina's lightning fast reflexes remain intact as he chooses to drop the dainty undergarment in favor of grabbing her by the collar. Under his other arm Zelgadis tries to duck away, but he forces her to stay with an iron grip against his chest. "Damn it you two, you're grown adults!" Lina scolds them. "Man up and act your age!"

"By wearing a bra?!" Gourry cries in terror. "There's nothing manly about that!"

"Oh, put a sock in it!"

"Just kill me," Zelgadis moans.

Author's Note: And so the awkward but hilarious mayhem continues. I didn't have plans to continue this story, but when this idea hit I just had to write it down. A nice mix of gender social constructs with Slayers humor, as it should be.