Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Ball Z or any of the characters appearing in the Dragon Ball Z series. This is purely fan fiction. I'm not making any profit from this story.
Warnings: Story contains Yaoi (male/male sexual situations) between Kaioshin and Kibito.
Author's Note: Looks like I'm writing for myself these days. Guess it keeps me busy.
Nothing inappropriate in this chapter. Eventually, if I feel like continuing. This is mainly adding depth and background to the story. No fun!
Oh yes, and I renamed the title. I find myself listening to Lady Gaga quite often while working on this story.
Part II
With night came a darkness that even the god feared.
It was not the lack of light that brought disturbance to the deity. In fact, the amount of luminosity exposing the numerous moons was plentiful. Though the celestial orbs in the sky appeared clearly during Kaiooshin-kais daytime, they became even more detailed and obvious with the coming night. In present time, the shade of the sky had long since shifted from lavender to violet, signaling that the planet was resting. All around, nocturnal insects began chirping, promising that the world remained abundant with life and would wake the following day.
Kaioshin appreciated the stars differently when he experienced them with physical eyes. He often sat as he did now, perched on the limb of a tall tree with one hand lightly resting on its trunk. He did so not to stabilize himself but to link himself to the land – a reminder, just in case he were to begin losing himself in the spellbinding cosmos stretched before him.
He was hopeless to the charm of the stars at times, his divine nature drawn to the heavens. For the time being, his body was more magnetized to the thought of rest. Sleep had become a rarity to him lately, more so than usual, for reasons he was all too aware of. Quite often, he had recurring dreams of times he'd rather not be reminded of – nightmares of events that occurred centuries ago. With all his heart, he willed his memories of that traumatic history to remain in the past and so he found himself fighting his body's needs until he felt too thoroughly drained to dream.
Kaioshin realized something then, with a slight widening of his eyes. Though it was trivial in a sense, Kibito had not scolded him for his intentional insomnia. Perhaps Kibito had finally acceded to the will of his Master.
Yes, Kaioshin was certain that Kibito had restrained his lecturing, if only temporarily. The look in his stern eyes had held disdain for the God's stubbornness when he had previously departed.
Said deity felt a brief memory bubbling to the surface of his consciousness.
"It's not going to kill me, Kibito," Kaioshin had said with slight exasperation. "As thorough you are as a bodyguard, it's unnecessary to protect me from myself."
Kibito's broad arms had been crossed against his chest. His eyes were devoid of the humor that coyly curled Kaioshin's lips and narrowed his angled gaze
"If it is a threat to your wellbeing then it certainly is a concern to me. Imagine how utterly ludicrous it would be for the God of the universe to die from lack of sleep."
Oh, how it only added to Kaioshin's humor to see his servitor struggle with obedience. Kaioshin simply couldn't help himself at times – he enjoyed testing Kibito's unrelenting restraint. It only added to Kaioshin's respect for the man and made him thankful to fate for providing him with such a consummate assistant.
Perhaps tonight Kibito had similar retrospect and had mentioned nothing. He had politely asked if Kaioshin required any further assistance and then bid him a polite good night before retreating into the distance.
Countless hours later, Kaioshin reluctantly followed suit, his decision based on an inability to focus his vision. Even the God of Gods could not control his heavy eyelids from closing gradually, though he tried and eventually forfeited the physical fight.
It was a short flight to the palace of the Dai Kai. So rarely inhabited, the single synthetic structure on Kaiooshin-kai had only one purpose: to reside in while resting. Kais naturally spent their days free of boundaries. Since thorough sleep was such a necessity, Kais indulged in luxuriously comfortable beds. For how much the gods loved nature, the ground simply wasn't suitable for sleeping.
Kaioshin touched down just before the imperial building. It was vast and immense, built of marbled precious stone that shined even in the dim light provided by the moons above. It reflected in the walkways, climbing as far as it could up the towering pillars that supported the structure. The ceiling was too high and too dark to be visible, giving the palace a sense of mystery and an artistic shadowing.
His footsteps carried him softly into its depths, too nimble and gentle to echo. Kibito was the only being to wake and his quarters existed too far a distance away to disturb.
The scenery of the residence was simplistic. The walls were bare, relying solely on the marble to give them beauty. Kaioshin's room, when he stepped into it, consisted of nothing more than a canopied bed and a simple table tucked away in a far corner. It rarely had a purpose.
Too tired to take the physical initiative, Kaioshin willed his clothing to change to something more suitable for sleep. A swift flash of magic caused the multiple layers of fabric to vanish, replaced by a simple and loose pair of pants that shifted like liquid as he sat on the bed.
It wasn't long until the luxuriously comforting cradle of the cushion tempted him to tangle within the soft sheets. His eyes had closed well before then, eagerly welcoming the foreboding shadows of slumber against his desperate wishes.
And so Kaioshin slept, dreading the lack of mercy of his dreams.
Unknown to the deity, Kibito allowed himself to follow suit. Up until the moment he had sensed his Master's ki enter the palace, he had spent hours diligently waiting. He sat, for the most part, reading the book he had previously neglected. Had Kaioshin been aware of Kibito's vigil, he may have accused him of gathering evidence for the next accusation of insomnia.
As usual for the God, Kaioshin would have been correct. Kibito simply couldn't bring attention to that fact. He was sure that if he did, he'd never hear the end of it.
Kaioshin's dreams always began the same way, with false promises of happiness – with lies of life.
He could hear their laughter before his body granted him sight. Had he been awake, their voices would have drawn from him the deepest, most longing despair. In his dreams, the sound of play simply caused him to sit up and peer beyond the book he had been studying, a smile appearing on his young face.
The two of them were at it again, joyously in motion and in play. West Kai was laughing, her long mane of hair flowing behind her as her feet carried her forward. Above her head, she clutched at a treat – one of impressive size and one of South Kai's favorites.
South Kai had apparently noticed, in full pursuit of the fleeing female. Because of her natural streaks of mischief and the teased look on South's strong-jawed face, Kaioshin described their game similar to "Hide and Seek". South Kai should have learned to hide his food, preferably in his stomach, before seeking it once the frolicsome woman got her playful hands on it.
Obviously South Kai had allowed himself to overlook his ability to simply summon an identical delicacy for a bout of fun and games. Though he seemed strict, most likely due to his strong stature and his aggressive appearance, everyone knew better. He was gentle at heart as they all were.
For now, the voice of knowledge whispered sibilantly, unheard by the ears of those running.
That was the last time Kaioshin would see them in person. Even if unapparent to him in his dream, his body knew. He unconsciously shifted in his sleep, turning onto his side. His instinct drew him into a fetal position, knees hugged close. His chest began to hitch softly and would continue with increasing intensity as the dream drew on.
It had begun. The gods started falling, one by one.
First came the frost, enveloping both his vision and his veins. Why West Kai had chosen to battle in the harsh environment had confounded him at first. It had been after her death he realized one of two possibilities: she either believed the harsh yet familiar terrain gave her an advantage or she simply wished to die on the land of Kaioshin-kai she represented. For the time being, he only remembered hearing her praying, acknowledging the inevitability of her destiny.
Through his thoughts, Kaioshin had watched the destruction of her beauty – her soul, her body, her entire being. He had seen so vividly the attack of energy that tore through her so effortlessly. Therein came the first engraving in his most feared memories – the way her head tipped forward with acceptance, only to snap back from the force exploding through her abdomen.
It was sickening – the way her blood reflected on the crystalline ice before a shocking burst of pink energy erased all traces of her existence. How the frozen surfaces had begun melting instantly from the temperature of her once living body.
The nightmare became more frightening during North Kai's confrontation with the monster, Majiin Buu. When the elder's sword sliced cleanly through the demon's body, he simply did not bleed. At that instance, any unmerited amount of hope Kaioshin had for North Kai had befittingly died.
While the end of North Kai was less menacing, it was no less devastating. Perhaps his aged and wise body had spared him the extent of excruciation the Supreme Kai of the West had endured. Ultimately, the result was indisputable in its cruelty – Buu contained not one shard of mercy among the jagged toothed and laughing void of his body. Reality only added to the increasing sorrow filling Kaioshin's suffering heart and to the fear of what was coming.
Centuries later, in present time and place, the same grief washed over his whimpering being. It overflowed in the form of the tears that begun falling abundantly down his still sleeping face.
Back then, when East Kai had desperately turned towards his superior, his body had been too overwhelmed to release tears from his wide, panic-stricken eyes. The obsidian, like the rest of his shocked and paralyzed form, shook with the utmost intensity.
"Sir," he cried out, his pitch driven high by the intensity of his fear. "West Kai and North Kai...They've both been killed!"
For how profoundly benevolent Dai Kai was, he had been unable to comfort his most fallible, young Kai. He simply stood, a thin sheen of sweat taken to his quivering brow, increasing as the incarnation of their darkest nightmares traveled southward.
At Buu's arrival, South Kai was readier than ever with an ungodly rage chiseled into his hard features. The environment in which their conflict began was equally unforgiving – built of sharp stone, of harshly hot and humid air, void of all life besides the two fighting foes. Nothing but death would soon exist after Buu's exit.
South's destiny, too, was decided by Buu. For how strong South Kai was, his physicality became his undoing. His fury must have been meddling with his ability to think logically and strategically. His body, his greatest hindrance, was simply too bulky to sustain the speed at which Majin Buu moved. For each of South Kai's bodily vulnerabilities, Majin Buu had a cruel and masterfully designed advantage. With each blow of foot and fist, that pink flesh would merely recoil as if any impact had never existed.
South Kai's remained the only creature bleeding between them. Crimson crested down his quivering brow even as he tore off an arm of his adversary. Just before the separating snap, the limb had stretched sickeningly, only to slap on the ground like rubber when returned to the monster by South's tossing hand.
With the combined dark expectations of the remaining three Kai's, none could have predicted the atrocity that occurred – how the limb liquified, only to launch at its attacker and envelop him in a writhing sheet of hot, living wax.
How Kaioshin had struggled with his own sanity then, seeing but not believing when the mass of suffocating flesh returned to its summoning owner. It simply reconnected with Buu's being, absorbing the idyllic warrior with a wet slap of sound. And then Buu began to change.
He became more of a monster, evolving and appearing more evil than before - that demonic hunger gorging on the purity it had obtained and destroyed so efficiently.
He grew greatly in size, a voice of demented excitement erupting from the new formation of a mouth. Muscles bulged grotesquely, ropes of veins sprouting heavily on Buu's body. Kaioshin could only watch in amazement as Buu doubled on himself as if in pain. It was all too obvious, when the gruesome being stood, that he had felt nothing short of raging, burning glee.
With increased hunger and a baffling speed, Majin Buu launched himself towards the East.
"He's coming!" Kaioshin remembered screaming, reeling from his visions. He had not realized until he turned towards his master that Dai Kai was no where to be seen.
Kaioshin cried for his elder but to no avail. Surely Dai Kai had seen Buu coming and had wisely decided to flee. The knowledge, in a way, was comforting – Dai Kai would remain safe for a little longer. Long enough, East Kai hoped, that his own inevitable death would not be in vain. Surely Dai Kai would think of something – some way to prevent the complete destruction of their legacy.
Still, East Kaioshin could not deny his own fears of death. Stars encroached his vision, nauseating and debilitating. When he closed his eyes they still existed, increasing in intensity when his fists clenched with the unfairness of it all. Nails from his fingers cut into flesh, purple blood pouring down his palms.
They were gods, all of them. They had only loving and holy intentions and protected the universe. How could any being be so corrupt to exist with the intent to defy the gods and the capability to destroy them!
Too soon, a blast of air signaling Buu's awful arrival introduced him to a monstrosity too malevolent for him to sanely comprehend. Nothing in his experiences had been so inviolable in its strength. Even the expression in those cavernous shrunken eyes could have destroyed Kaioshin had he allowed it. The way they targeted him with the intent of annihilation brought his senses back with a wave of empowering adrenaline.
Through the pulse of thunderous blood racing through his ears, Kaioshin could still hear his thoughts. They reminded him, as he rushed forward with ki raised, that he was the weakest of the Supreme Kai. Certainly he could be no match for the beast.
What his cognition didn't take into account were the memories that filled his sharp eyes with rage.
West and how her feminine soft hair whipped wildly in the wind.
South and how he watched her then with clandestine, forbidden compassion.
North and the way his eyes expressed such pride for catching the largest fish.
The memories of their deaths shattered his limitations, providing him with powers he had never felt before. But even his emotions failed to prevent bruises from blossoming, inflicted by each narrowly deflected hit. It could not stop violet blood from erupting from his gasping mouth as one pink fist impacted his chest.
The taste of blood suffused his senses with a sickening intensity, causing him to choke as he stumbled weakly in his attempts to regain his stolen balance. He remembered so clearly the dark laughter echoing above him. It disgusted him with its pure iniquity, as did the truth that Buu was using only a diminutive portion of his power.
As he had with the Kais left dead in his wake, Majin Buu was only toying with the Supreme Kai of the East, utilizing Kaioshin as his newest plaything. The entire time, Buu had been mocking the desperate God's attempts.
It was his nature that caused Kaioshin to hold back. Against his instincts, he remained reluctant; Gods did not destroy. It was simply against the religion of the Kai. They existed only to bless and protect the universe from utter destruction.
If it means killing this being of embodied insanity, so be it, Kaioshin's crumbling mental reservation cried at him. Against his will, it seemed his energy was reacting independent of him. Ki had taken to his fingers, cracking thunderously with its intensity. It felt as though Kaioshin's will threatened to go through even him in its desire to defeat the demon.
Energy drew itself from his entirety and collected within, pooling into his palms only when he allowed it – only when the amount had reached its maximum. From then on, his awareness became scattered. For an instant, he focused on that taunting, daring toothed-grin. And then he lost himself into the experience of it all – the blinding release and the resulting explosion of electricity.
His vision, when he finally regained it, was blotted by a rainbow of vibrant colors. The hard surface present at his back was an indication that the blast had thrown Kaioshin from of his feet and onto the ground. His head agreed with his conclusion, still spinning from the disorienting attack.
Precious moments passed before Kaioshin managed to regain the focus necessary to search wildly for his foe. He saw nothing but smoke standing in the demolition resulting from his forceful attack. What had once existed as dense boulders and rock had been reduced to rubble and dust.
As for Buu, not a trace remained...or so Kaioshin mistakenly thought.
Never had a crueler joke been made in Kaioshin's experience then when Buu appeared. Buu allowed enough time to pass for the smoke to settle completely before exposing his flawless body. How an evil being possess such patience when it so hungrily thirsted for death was a mystery. Perhaps seeing the shock paling Kaioshin's face had been worth the wait. The shattering of his weakened resolve must have been utterly gratifying.
How could it be? Kaioshin's mind screamed. His internal voice trembled at the edge of insanity. The only thing I achieved was prolonging my inevitable fate.
It was true – Majin Buu had been merely been forced back to the brink of the horizon. Kaioshin was sure, when the pink beast began running, that he had only inflicted a negligible amount of damage.
The sound of thunder arose again, caused by furiously pounding feet. Buu was coming again, launching himself forward as Kaioshin forced himself to his feeble feet. He stood solely with the intention of facing his terrifying fate, certain that he could not fend off the fiend.
He had barely regained his bearings enough to brace himself before Buu hit him .
The impact of shoulder to sternum sent Kaioshin flying. Almost instantly, mountain was shattering at his spine. The force drove him easily into a cold coffin of stone, far past the avalanche that abruptly followed.
This is it, he thought, his head hanging weakly. One hand reached forward to clutch at the edges of the crater. He did so in a struggle to open his eyes, feeling it necessary to utilize the last of his failing body's energy. He would force himself to see his ending, just as the other Kais had. He refused to spend his last seconds cowering.
What he saw was mesmerizing. Energy, full and fiery, burning with the intent of finishing him. How hot it must have been to burn his face from the rapidly decreasing distance.
Suddenly, a flash of cool air, reminiscent of the protective shade of a tree. Certainly, he was dying now – growing cold as the final measure of energy left his body.
Even in his haze, Kaioshin was not convinced. He was capable of opening his eyes, obsidian suddenly obstructed by a familiar rotund form.
"Dai Kaio!" he cried. His voice shook with fear for his leader, pleading the deity let him accept his destiny – a destiny that would not be.
With a yell, Dai Kai reflected the ball of energy. Simultaneously, the rocks holding Kaioshin shifted from the force and dropped him roughly to his hands and knees. From his collapsed stance on the ground, Kaioshin could see the deflected attack strike their enemy.
Kaioshin had never seen something comparable to Dai Kai's ensuing assault, watching in amazement as Majin Buu split into cleanly sliced cubes. Abruptly after, a deafening explosion rocked the entire planet.
The two allies watched in terror at what happened next. The remnants of his body had survived and began recollecting in a mass suspended in the skies. And then it did something more horrifying. It multiplied, stretching in size with the intentions of absorbing the purest of pure beings: Dai Kai.
To this day, Kaioshin could clearly hear his mentor's suffering screams.
"No!" cried Kaioshin, his own voice angrily pleading. "I'm the one you wanted! Let him go!"
Despite all Kaioshin's desperate wishes, he was stricken into submission, his mind failing to believe what he was seeing. His master, the God of all Gods, was struggling within the stretching walls of pink palpitating flesh. He was dying before Kaioshin, ceasing to exist in a finalizing burst of steam.
What happened following the death of Dai Kaioshin was a haze. Nothing mattered then. In his sorrow, Kaioshin did not care if Buu had been transformed into something tamable. He did not care if for some cruel reason his life had been spared.
Like crystal under extreme, unrelenting pressure, the corners of his vision began to spiderweb and chip.
It caused the image to bow and finally burst - the sounds of shattering glass echoing in the emptiness of his consciousness.
The world had disappeared, along with the sky, the stars, the moons, and surrounding planets – the entire existence of space all around him gone. Only he was remained, left alone in the universes absence.
No, he whispered, This cannot be. This...
He had to do something. He had to. He had to do something now, though he'd already lost everything.
All he could do was claw his hands in his hair. Roots tore and scalp split, blood rising generously from the damaged skin. With his pain already so immense, Kaioshin was numb to his self-mutilation. He simply could not contain the rage that now controlled him. Like his bleeding, his hatred was spilling over, existing for Majin Buu and for Babidi, his ruthless creator.
Even stronger was Kaioshin's personal disfavor. He had been too scared, too weak, too much of a failure. He wasn't strong enough – he was a weakling. He'd watched everyone die and even as a God hadn't been able to do anything.
You deserved to die more than any of them, arose the harsh voice of his mind, ashamed and angry. He fought with himself like the worst of enemies. Pathetic and powerless – you don't deserve to be remain among the living!
His sanity finally burst with a sickening, bloodcurdling scream.
The sound tore venomously through Kibito's heart, cruelly jarring him awake from his restful sleep. Never before had he felt such an urgency. Embracing it, he used his skills to take him to Kaioshin's residence in a single flashing instant.
Kibito knew he should have expected this – increasingly, it seemed, Kaioshin was struggling with the traumas of his history. He was battling it now in his slumber, tossing and turning in the sheets as if to shake himself from his unrelenting dreams.
He ceased abruptly when Kibito's solid grasp closed around his upper arms, effectively pinning him to the bed below him. That same second, the deity's eyes shot open, a wild fright scribed within his constricted pupils. An equally sharp cry came from his lips, dying abruptly only when he recognized Kibito staring down at him.
Kaioshin was simply too stunned to feel any amount of embarrassment. There was none to be had, as far as Kibito was concerned. He knew he could never fully understand the trauma Kaioshin had suffered. Though Kaioshin had remained composed during his previous description of the events, Kibito had sensed the immense grief that underlaid his being. It had impacted his memory. Even now, Kibito could remember it clearly - as if it occurred just yesterday.
Though what Kaioshin had seen was a nightmare, it was no less a tragedy. Kibito found himself angry, both for not being there in the past to prevent the happening and because he could not guard the deity from his memories.
"My dear Kai," Kibito said gently, his voice so soft it bordered silence. "Do not cry. What you saw was merely a dream."
It was as if Kaioshin had not heard him or he simply didn't believe. He continued sobbing, unable to control his behavior. Blindly, his fingers desperately clutched at whatever existed within their reach, entwining themselves in the fabric of Kibito's clothing.
When Kaioshin pulled him closely, Kibito understood his intentions. After losing everyone in his past, the god was desperately trying to keep Kibito close for he was the only remaining person the deity had. For this reason, Kibito did all he could to prevent his heart from gaining false expectations. He hoped that his best efforts proved to be enough.
It was not. Kibito's resolve began transgressing the instant Kaioshin rested his head on his chest. The God had effortlessly drawn Kibito entirely onto the bed where they now rested, surrounded by sheets smelling of the idol's tenuous essence. Kibito was not entirely unwilling.
For Kaioshin, the embrace was innocently comforting. He listened to his servitor's strong heartbeat, oblivious to its true stimulus. To Kaioshin's innocent knowledge the increased rate could only be induced by Kibito's concern for his Master. The steady intensity of Kibito's pulse did not decrease and eventually became a concern to Kaioshin. How much of a fool he must have made of himself. Kibito did not scare easily.
Rising abruptly, Kaioshin looked down at his assistant. His mouth moved silently as though he searched for something to say
"I- ," Kaioshin began, embarrassment finally encroaching. His skin had taken on a slight shade of pink. "I shouldn't have, Kibito. I'm sorry..."
It was obvious to Kibito what the other was referring. He was apologizing for crossing boundaries thought to be indecent. It may have been improper if only considering Kibito's hidden affections. Regardless, Kibito was his guardian. He allowed only what was in Kaioshin's best interest.
If this would help him, Kibito would allow it. Had his affection for Kaioshin been nonexistent, he would have still permitted it. It was his duty to support his God by any means necessary.
Kibito couldn't help it – for just a moment, he gave in to his aspirations.
One of his hands lifted from where it had been stiffened and restrained at his side. He ran it through that disheveled mohawk, fully expecting when his heart skipped a beat. Kaioshin's hair was silken and softer than he'd imagined.
When Kibito swallowed hard, Kaioshin suspected he was simply trying to clear his own embarrassment.
"Kaioshin," he said, "You have no reason to apologize. Even a God is vulnerable at times. You have the right to be affected by your emotions. Being the Supreme Kai, you are not forbidden to cry. Your heart is likely the most loving in the universe. Because of this, no one could expect you to be emotionless."
The look in those encompassing eyes assured Kibito he had said exactly what Kaioshin longed to hear. Still, tears continued accumulating beneath that enchanting obsidian.
Dear God, Kibito thought to himself quietly, as if fearing Kaioshin would look into his mind. If he continues this, I will not be capable of hiding what I feel for him. His emotion is contagious.
Some relief was granted as Kaioshin rested his head again, the tips of his hair stroking Kibito's chin. Under other circumstances, the contact would have been torture. The only suffering Kibito felt arose from Kaioshin's soft shaking and the feeling of saline warmth dampening his skin.
"I couldn't help them," choked that feeble voice. "I watched them die. All of them. Why, of all Kais, did I survive?"
"You are aiding them now by respecting their memories," Kibito answered truthfully. "They died so that you could live. Dai Kaio was tremendously wise and offered himself for causes you cannot comprehend. It does not mean that he did so in vain. He had reasons for his actions. Perhaps in time, you will discover why."
Kibito paused briefly before continuing. "Until then, blaming yourself will prove unwise. You cannot claim responsibility for fate, even as a God. You simply did what you were predetermined to do. Against all apparent odds, you survived because fate still has a destiny for you to fulfill. You will, when the opportunity arrives."
One brave hand reached for Kaioshin, guiding him closer towards his guardian. The deity moved willingly, shifting with a soft whispering of sheets. As they came to face each other, Kibito to cup his visage softly. For once, he hoped Kaioshin knew the reason why his heart raced.
Gentle thumbs brushed just beneath the black borders of those eyes. To Kibito's dismay, they were sealed with suffering, and so he moved slowly, lingering. Kibito touched the god as carefully as one would porcelain, finding the deity to be more fragile then he ever would have suspected. Oh, how must suffering he must have endured to keep his emotions so hidden.
Gradually, though, those eyes opened, filled now with something Kibito had never previously seen. No one in his life had regarded him that way – in a manner that touched his core and exposed more than he'd ever comfortably allow.
"Kibito," Kaioshin began, his expression encouraging the assistant to relax. There was a peaceful aura of tiredness overtaking the deity. Kibito realized then just how wearied they both were. "I would appreciate if you considered remaining here tonight. I think..." Kaioshin paused to smile. "I think I would rest better if you remained near."
"If that is your wish," Kibito said, managing to control his composure. How such a capability existed in him, he was uncertain.
He was simply thankful for his abilities and for Kaioshin, who slept peacefully throughout the remaining night.