Planting Seeds
We walk into the house, me, Mommy and Derek with this pregnant lady who's showing us the place. I don't care. I'm not interested in the house, only in going back to school. I want boring English. I want Science. I was never consulted about all of this, just told what to do. I'd protest, but that would mean that I'd be showing behaviour they wouldn't expect, and I want Mommy to see me as a good girl. A good daughter.
"There's three bedrooms- four if you count the nursery, and why wouldn't you? This one here is the master suite." The pregnant lady is pointing to a room a little way away. I wish that we hadn't lost the old house. I want my bedroom back. I want to go to stand-by. I like doing that, switching off, and letting myself switch back on several hours later. Although the nightmares I don't like.
I walk away from them, to the far end of the house. I don't care about the house, and this is starting to annoy me. However, the place is large, with a garden that's got potential to walk in. I like walking about. It relaxes me, helps me to think. I think a lot. I need to there's lots to think about.
"I'll check the electric." Derek sounds like he's not enjoying this, either. I hear his heavy footsteps fall away. I pointlessly look about the bathroom. I feel like sticking my lower lip out, frowning, and folding my arms, stamping on the ground in the process. But that would be bad. Mommy wouldn't like that. And I really want her to be happy with me.
"So you live next door?" That's Mommy. Making sure that no-one gets suspicious with us. I should do more of that.
"Hmm Hmm." That indicates a yes. I think I'm getting better at understanding subtle sounds and gestures. That's good. Maybe soon I can reveal all of this to Mommy, and she'll be proud of me.
I'd like that.
"So where did the owners go?" Oh. That's a good question. All the furniture is here.
"Oh, they're in Tokyo for a year. Bob was a last minute fill-in for his boss. Guy's stroked out three days before he was supposed to leave. Don't feel bad, met the guy once and he grabbed my ass with his wife five feet away. Not this ass, of course," the pregnant lady explains as slaps her own bottom. She is likeable and annoying at the same time. There must be something wrong with me. I can't have two opinions of her. It doesn't make sense.
Then again, very little of this past Earth makes sense. The path of my life makes no sense. I guess if something makes sense, I should worry. Oh. Why is there silence? I turn my head to look at them. Oh. The pregnant lady is looking puzzled and concerned.
"Er, you-" she starts, pointing to forehead.
"Car accident." Mommy is so reassuring, so believable. I'm learning how to do that. To help me be a better infiltrator, and help kill the Skynet demon.
"Oh." the tone is one of realisation and understanding. It's good. Mommy is good.
"The whole family. Teaching that one to drive." Her head tilts slightly, to indicate me. I feel hurt again. Why is it always my fault? Okay, I was in a car explosion that damaged me, and I went out on a murder rampage, but it wasn't my fault. I never planted the car bomb under the Jeep, and I never planned to get blown up...
This day sucks. Sucks for me.
"You're kidding me." She finds it hard to believe. I do, too. Because I'm used as an excuse again. Cameron is the Terminator. Cameron is a Machine. Cameron can't be trusted. Cameron is a bad guard dog. Woof. Woof. I want to scream and shout, let them know I'm angry and hurt, and storm off into my bedroom and slam the door. But I don't have a bedroom, and I don't have a way of doing this without making Mommy angry.
"I don't kid about teenagers." Her tone is clear. I also know she's telling the truth. She doesn't kid when it comes to teenagers. This has brought a reaction to the pregnant lady, one of realisation, and fear. She's looking down at her large belly, feeling it.
"Hoh, I can't even imagine." Oh. I wonder if I get pregnant? What would it be like, to get fat with a baby, to have large, over-swelled breasts, and have problems with mobility? I want that. To get pregnant. To have children. Suddenly, I feel a twinge in my belly. It's the need to have children. Or its the need to have food. I'm not sure yet.
"How many months are you?" I stare at the belly, wondering about the baby moving inside it. I want one. I want to be fat with baby.
"Seven. Feel like a whale." She sounds irritated at being baby-fat. I wouldn't. I'd be happy. I don't understand the whale part. What has being pregnant got to do with a several tonne marine mammal that eats shrimp and plankton?
"You look great." Mommy is being reassuring again. The look on the pregnant lady's face says to me she doesn't believe it.
"I'm an orca. With boobs." Oh. Orca. They hunt and eat seals. Oh. I understand now. She has food cravings for seals. I guess pregnancy makes you do strange things. Like eat seals.
"There are worse things to be." Yes. I agree with Mommy. She could have cravings for sharks. Or Dolphins. I watched a documentary about Japan, and they eat whales and seals and dolphins. But they weren't pregnant. Mostly.
I walk into the room, eager to look at the belly more closely. I stand next to Mommy, at her right side. I can't help but stare at the belly. It's nice to look at. It's full of life. Oh. And her belly button is sticking out a little.
"You wanna feel it? It's cool, everyone does," she says as she rubs her belly. I places my right hand on the top right of her belly. It's amazing. I feel it. Life. She is full of life. I want to feel like that. When the war is over, and I have a heart. I need to have a heart to be able to love my baby. The pregnant lady laughs a little.
"It's crazy, right? Once upon a time, you were inside her," she says, indicating Mommy. I wish. I'd like that a lot if it were true. My eyes look at Mommy, my head staying still. She doesn't like that notion. Of me inside her belly, making her fat. And it hurts. Mommy moves my hand away, the grip firm. Oh. She thinks I'll hurt it or something. Nothing I do is ever good enough. Ever right. She's not looking at me, her face and eyes still focused on the pregnant lady.
"We can move in today." I guess this will be home from now on... But I'm getting a nice sized bedroom. I want one where I can walk around a lot. I like walking.
"Oh, yeah. As soon as I figure out what to do with all this stuff," she says, the tone telling me she's now having a hard time figuring out what to do with the furniture at such sort notice.
"We'll take it, all of it." The pregnant lady seems a bit puzzled by this. And concerned. I feel bored. I walk away, my attention focussed on this plant I've just noticed. I can sense it. Not like with people, but... it's on an emotional level. An...
Oh.
I sense it. The plant is alive. It is aware. I touch the stalk. It's talking to me. I feel myself drawn in, the plant telling me about the owners of the house, of the pregnant lady – oh, her name is Kacy. The things it is telling me... But how can I talk with this plant?
Oh. Oh. It's the power. When I was changed by the energy. It gave me a gift.
I can talk to plants.
I like this. It's a tight present.
"Cameron, what are you doing?" I look up, seeing Mommy and Kacy staring at me, looking confused. Very confused.
The plant doesn't like it here. It prefers being in it's old spot. It prefers more sunlight. And the soil is too dry. And the soil could do with more nitrates." Kacy is looking at me, impressed.
"You know all that from touching it?" She seems to think I am skilled with plants. Which I now am.
No, I know all that because it told me. It likes you, by the way." She's looking at me strangely. Her face... it is full of disbelief. As if I've done something impossible. Oh. Magic. She probably doesn't believe in it.
"I'm full of wire." She's looking at me as if I'm mad. "I've got a metal plate in my head. I fell down. Hard." Her face is now filling up with understanding.
"Right... Sorry to hear that," she says as Mommy looks at me, a volcano about to erupt. Oh. I've messed up again.
This will be a very long day indeed.