Transformers does not belong to me, blah blah, you know the drill…
Mistakes Made
Chapter Two: Medical Issues
It took Ratchet two weeks to develop a medication that would- hopefully- relieve them of their problematic situation.
Remarkably, Silica, who'd made a full recovery from her long odyssey in space, didn't show any suspicious behavior. Yet.
She had managed to recall a few more things from her past. That she had grown up near Crystal City on Cybertron, that the refugee ship she had been on had been commandeered by an Autobot captain called Onyx and headed towards Hyperion. Past that they still didn't know much about her, mostly because she usually kept to herself and never said more than she really had to.
Optimus, for his part, didn't know what to do with her. She didn't seem all that interested in interacting with anyone, human or Autobot, nor did she ever ask to be allowed outside or mention having been trained in, well, pretty much anything. He was used to dealing with seasoned or at least aspiring warriors, scientists, engineers, in short: specialized bots who had at least some clue as to what they were doing and were eager to, well, do something.
He didn't believe her to be of low intellect, far from it; the precise and smart answers she gave when she was asked something proved it. Maybe, he wondered, the young femme just didn't know what to do with herself. With a bot who preferred to spend most of her time alone and in silence, it was hard to tell though.
It did get a little better when Ratchet started administering the medication, so now while she was still very shy, she was now trying to be at least a little bit useful whenever she could. Bumblebee's presence seemed to be making her feel comfortable. His young age might have been the reason they were getting along rather well. At times, she could even be found watching him and Rafael playing video games, although she usually refused to join in.
The humans didn't know about her condition. It had been decided that, since she would pose no kind of threat to them, it would be treated like a standard medical issue: confidentially. It wasn't necessary for them to know and Optimus wanted to spare the children the details.
"Come on, you can do it."
"I… don't know."
"Of course you can. Come on!" Bumblebee reassured the young femme again. He fell back into a fighting stance, starting to circle her in the middle of the training room. She was a bit taller than him, not exactly weak either- he thought she would make a formidable warrior… if she could bring her limbs to do as she wanted.
"I'll just fall on my butt again."
"This time you won't. Come at me!"
Silica sighed, then flexed her shoulders before crouching. When she thought the moment was right, she bolted towards the yellow mech, trying to tackle him- which he answered with a slight push to her head and a nonchalant step to the side. She almost lost her balance, but managed to not go down face first for a change.
"Tackling only really works in a fight if your opponent doesn't see you coming." Bumblebee explained. "Just now, I had about two seconds to react to your attack. Remember, I showed you a few other things. Surprise me."
She tried to regain her countenance. Her large blue optics focused on the scout once again. This time she charged him again, but slower, skidding to a halt in front of him and starting a forward kick as a feint, turning her hip when her leg was halfway up to hit him from the side; only she underestimated her momentum, whirled around as a result, lost her footing and fell backwards- right into Bumblebee's arms.
She felt his strong body against her back, his armor scraping against hers.
"Okay, you've won."
"Not yet, I haven't." He chuckled, tightening his grip around her waist. "How do you escape if an enemy catches you from behind?"
"No really, I give up." She said more urgently, trying to ignore the heat starting to pool in her abdomen. She could feel how warm his body was, how his thick armor moved against her ever so slightly, his hips pressing into her backside so deliciously…
"Come ooon~" he sang teasingly.
It was too much for her, the strength in his hold, his body against hers, his smell… she moaned. Loudly.
"What the-" He released her immediately, confused as he watched the femme stumble away from him.
"Uh… thanks for the lesson, Bee. I need to get going!" She mumbled hastily, then hurried out of the room and down the hallway.
Once Silica had reached her room, she rushed inside and locked the door behind her. Her skidplate hit the ground with a heavy thud as she let herself slide down onto the floor. A sob escaped her. Oh damn her and that treacherous body of hers! Why did she have to turn every single interaction with another bot into an awkward situation? Why were there always those thoughts in the back of her processor?
It wasn't acceptable, wasn't appropriate, it made everything so difficult.
She thought back to what had happened just now. The yellow mech had felt so good pressed up against her like that… oh how she's wished, just for a moment, he would have just bent her over and…
The white and green femme had started touching herself without noticing it. Her hands were wandering across her body, one upwards to her neck, to find the sensitive spots there, the other downwards, to reach for the insufferable heat that had collected between her thighs.
Her port covering popped open immediately and she didn't hesitate to plunge two fingers deep into her soaking entry.
Yes, Bumblebee was a very handsome mech, albeit there might have been too much of a youngling left in him.
She was pumping her fingers in and out of her throbbing port furiously now, arching her back when she added another finger. She needed more.
There was another mech on base though, one with nearly perfect genetics: tall, incredibly handsome, strong, mature and intelligent… she moaned only thinking about him. And she needed more still.
In a lustful haze, she crawled over to the storage compartment next to her berth, where she kept the… tool Ratchet had made to help with her occasional conditions. It was thick and long, with little rows of nubs along its sides for stimulation. Her port ached due to the lack of touch while she was retrieving it.
With her knees on the floor and her chest resting on the edge of her berth, she rammed the entire thing up her most intimate area in one go, imagining it was this one mech taking her roughly.
"Optimus…" she moaned, rocking with the thrusts she administered on herself, trying to make herself believe there was actually another bot participating… but there wasn't. She couldn't possibly mimic the strength of a mech thrusting at the height of passion. There was no warm body grinding against her, no hot breath against the back of her neck. No clanging of his hips meeting hers, no hands gripping her…
The pleasure that had been built up until now was starting to ebb away again.
"No no no, come on!" It couldn't happen again now, she was so close already! Desperate to reach relief, she doubled her efforts, clenching her optics shut and trying to visualize the Autobot leader. His broad shoulders, strong arms and long legs. That small smile of his, making his handsome face look ever so beautiful. That smile she had seen only a few times, in those few quiet moments when everything was peaceful. His slender hips that would fit between her legs so snugly…
She imagined the things he would do to her, the way his fingers would dig into her armor as overload washed through him- and she knew it would feel absolutely nothing like what she was currently doing to herself.
She stopped. This was pointless. She would never reach her peak like that, and even if she did, it would only numb her hunger for a short while. Burying her face in her forearms on the berth, Silica felt her processor ache returning. Those aches had gotten worse ever since she had started taking the medication Ratchet had given her.
It didn't really work all that well anyway, but she hadn't told the medic for fear he would increase the daily dose. And therefore, her frequent processor aches.
She decided not to leave her room for the rest of the day. Silica was feeling ashamed of her inability to reign herself in, and she dreaded the thought of encountering any of the mechs. This day would end just like so many others: with her lying awake on her berth, trying to recharge but being denied by her unfulfilled urges. It would be a long night.
Optimus Prime was tired. And cold. And dirty. Patrolling the country roads in the Great Plains was usually rather relaxing, but not right after harvesting season, when the streets were full of muck the agricultural machines brought with them on their way off the fields. And definitely not when it was raining on said muck, turning the streets into one large swamp.
He drove through the groundbridge and transformed as soon as he was inside the base. Dirt crunched between his armor plates and came off him in lumps, a puddle quickly formed where he was touching the floor.
"Come on, Optimus, really?" Ratchet groused, putting his hands on his hips. Next to the Decepticons, there was barely a thing he detested more than dirt. On his floor, none the less. Who knew what sorts of horrible earth microorganisms were hiding in those dabs?
"Sorry." The Prime grumbled tiredly. "Is there any news from Bumblebee and Arcee?"
Ratchet shook his head. "They haven't reported in yet. I'll let you know when they do."
Optimus sighed. He had been driving all day, without finding a single trace of Decpeticon activity in the area. It made him feel uneasy not to know what they were up to.
Anyway, he needed to clean up. Badly.
"In that case, I will go take care of myself."
"Do that." The medic shook his head, offended by the trail of dirt his leader left behind as he walked towards the showers. He was about to get the mop when Silica walked into the main hangar.
"I'll get it." She said as she walked past him. She didn't have anything else to kill her time with anyway. Also, Ratchet had enough to do manning the groundbridge and the monitors.
In her usual deliberate way, she started cleaning the floor, starting with the groundbridge and working her way along the trail of mud. As it was quite a lot of dirt, it took her a while to get all of it, so by the time she reached the door to the shower room, she assumed that Optimus was already done and might have been in his quarters. After listening for a moment to make sure but not hearing anything from inside, she opened the door and stepped into the room to finish her cleaning.
Only Optimus wasn't finished yet.
He was standing in the back, next to the table in the corner, and scrubbing away at his upper body armor he had taken off for that purpose, his chest, arms and shoulders exposed down to the protoform.
Silica just stood there, staring at his backside. He was easily the most attractive mech she had ever seen. He looked good with his armor on, but without it, he was a whole new level.
The instant wetness behind her port covering betrayed her thoughts. She needed that mech.
Optimus heard something shift behind him and turned around. Surprisingly, it was Silica, completely motionless and with a mop in her hands.
"I- I'm sorry, I didn't know you were still-",she stammered, turning to leave again.
"It's alright. I am almost finished." He wasn't all that bothered she was seeing him with half his armor off. The many years of war and the resulting minimalistic lifestyle they were all leading had gotten him used to a minimum amount of privacy. He continued cleaning his armor without wasting a second thought on the possibility that for her, it probably wasn't the same.
Silica shook her head slowly in an attempt to regain her senses- to no avail. Still, she gripped the mop tighter and started wiping up the end of the mud trail.
"Actually…",she started, feeling her faceplates become uncomfortably hot, "I've been meaning to talk to you anyway."
"Yes? Is there a problem?" He turned around to face her again. She stopped cleaning to look up at him.
"Uh, yes… I mean no. Well, maybe…"
Optimus walked up to the unsettled femme, putting a hand on her shoulder and smiling reassuringly. "There is no need to be shy. You can tell me. I will try to help you to the best of my abilities."
That he didn't mean it the way she was tempted to interpret it was clear. Still, especially now that he was so close, she had to suppress a pleasurable shiver.
"You don't know what you're saying. I… ever since I arrived, you've all been so good to me. You're all working so hard to keep this place safe. I'm feeling so ashamed." His hand was so wonderfully heavy. And big. She wondered what those strong fingers would feel like, buried deep within her…
"I know it's hard to not be able to contribute much. But in time, things will change. You are young, and there is much for you to learn. You will find your place eventually, I assure you."
"Yes but… that's not what I'm trying to say." He cocked his head to the side a bit, confused. What else could she be talking about? "I… need…"
"Yes?"
She took his other hand in her smaller one and guided it to her behind. "…you. I need you."
The large mech pulled his hand away immediately, his optics widened in realization. She couldn't possibly mean…
"Silica. Have you taken your medication?"
"I have!" She sobbed. "I have but I just can't control myself! I can't recharge and I can barely think straight! I can't keep using that artificial… thing Ratchet made, it just doesn't work that way! Please sir, I… I need you inside me…"
The femme was clinging to him by now, her protruding chest pressed against his bare protoform. Now he was embarrassed. He could feel her sparkbeat through her armor and it made him tingle all over. His core temperature made a leap. But no, he told himself, this was definitely not okay. Ever so gently, he started prying her off of himself.
"Please, Silica. You need to stop." Optimus tried to calm her down, but she seemed rather unreceptive concerning that matter.
"I need this…" she cried, tears welling up in her optics. "I need it just like I need energon… please, Optimus… I'm starving…"
He looked down at her, how she was standing there, shivering and in tears. It was breaking his spark to see any bot like that. But what she was asking of him went way too far.
"I cannot do this. I'm sorry."
"You think I'm ugly. Is that it?" The white and green femme wrapped her arms around herself. Optimus sighed, taking another look at the young femme. She had a pretty face, with large blue optics and a shapely mouth, her body was curvy and well proportioned, with wide hips and a narrow waist, her armor clinging to her protoform nicely... this femme was anything but ugly. Not that it really mattered.
"No, you are beautiful. I mean that. But engaging in such… activities would not be right. I cannot take advantage of you in such a way."
Silica sniffed, wiping the tears off her face. "How could you possibly be taking advantage of me when I am the one in need of this?"
"Rash actions are simply not something I can afford in my position. Do you understand that?" He went down on one knee so he could be closer to her optic level. "You should go see Ratchet. Surely he can-"
"No. I'd rather spend the rest of my life locked up in my room than let him flood my system with even more medicine." She seemed angry all of a sudden, taking a few steps back. "He treats me like I'm sick. Like it's not okay for me to be the way I am."
"He's a medic. He knows what's best for you." Optimus stated. He was remembered of how tired he was and this encounter was getting more and more mentally exhausting.
"But does he know what it's like to be a breeder? To be permanently deprived of something so essential?" The pain on her face was so rough, her desperation… Optimus felt stupid, confronted with this different form of cybertronian life. She was telling the truth. It was like not grasping the concept of a suffocating human needing air to breathe, and watching it die slowly instead, accusing it of being addicted to air. Her voice sounded weak when she continued.
"I could feel how my touch aroused you. Don't try to deny it. You might not need this as badly as I do, but you need it all the same. Why can't you just forget your rank, just for a moment, and enjoy what I have to offer?" The Prime shook his head vehemently, got back up and walked over to the table to finish cleaning his armor. Yes he wanted to end her misery, but this was way too personal for his taste.
"This discussion is over. You should go talk to Ratchet."
Her face contorted in what seemed to be real agony. But she said nothing more. Instead, she just turned and left.
Optimus let out a heavy breath. He, the supreme commander of all Autobots, the mighty and seasoned warrior, was feeling completely helpless.