"So you've reserved the 17th and 18th? Fine. Oh no, it's no problem; it's all part of my plan! Good day", Raphael said into the telephone and hung it up. His wife, Ivy Valentine walked out of the office in her 2P SCII outfit with a clipboard.
"Raphael, who was that calling at the phone?" she asked. He tried to walk away, as he didn't want to tell her who was reserving the room.
"BEEEEEE STILL!" she commanded, took the Alraune and pulled him back toward her. He really didn't like it when she did that…
"Nothing my dear, just some ordinary guests", he said. Suddenly, the Alraune swerved toward the phone and encircled it, feeding Ivy the necessary information to make Raphael's life harder.
"Raphael, I told you, you cannot bring Soul Edge fanatics to our hotel! You know why I prohibit it!" Ivy scoffed at him.
"Come off it my dear dominatrix, they need lodgings for the night and I thought I'd accommodate them with some!" Raphael told her.
"My sword tells me they were in another country, please Raphael, call them back and say they should go somewhere else", Ivy said.
"You're trusting the Alraune? It's a rose for God's sake!" Raphael said.
"It's also the best weapon I have ever!" Ivy retorted. "Now don't make me go Primal Dominance on you!"
"No Ivy, they're paying us…"
"RAPHAEL!"
"All right my dear, I'll get to it straightaway", he said and she walked outside. "I'm going to Aurelia's house for our book club, now you better get that done before I get back. Oh, and have Cassandra go out to market and get some lobster for Friday."
"Yes my little hive of wasps", he said sweetly as Ivy rolled her eyes and stepped out of the house.
"You're revolting," she muttered to herself as she walked to her car, a sleek silver Aston Martin V8 Vantage and drove toward Aurelia's house for her book club.
Raphael walked into the dining room to find the guests, some regular like Seong Han-myong and some other guests like Miss Chai Xianghua.
"Oooooooh! Excuse me!" she said, in an irritatingly high-pitched voice. Raphael ignored her, hoping she'd leave him alone.
"EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE MEEEEEEEE, SIIIIIIIIR?" she shrieked at him. Raphael tensed up and turned toward her.
"Yes?" he asked, tiredly as she walked up to her and her boyfriend, Kilik.
"Alright, me and Kilik want to go somewhere CRAAAAAAAAAAAZY around here! Do you know where to go for a CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZY GOOD TIME?" Xianghua asked.
"Here's the address to the nearest insane asylum", Raphael said, writing on a sketchpad. "JUST KIDDING!"
"That's my line!" Xianghua yelled. "JUST KIDDING!"
Raphael puked.
"I…" Kilik started.
"STOP! You're voice makes me want to kill myself!" Raphael said, clutching his ears.
A/N: Kilik's voice in SC2 absolutely drives me up the wall with how annoying it is! It makes me angry at how anime-esque and stereotypical Asian sounding it is that I wish he would just be like Charade and never utter a WORD! Back to the story…
Suddenly, Ivy came back into the room with three brochures in her hand and walked up to the infuriatingly annoying couple.
"You can try Setsuka's Giant Umbrella Cocktail Bar!" Ivy said, handing over a brochure of the shop with Setsuka on the cover giving a thumbs up next to a large cocktail drink with one of her umbrella-swords inside.
"Thank you Mrs. Sorel", Xianghua said, sticking her tongue out at Raphael.
"It's Miss Valentine actually, I refused to take his last name", Ivy said sweetly.
"Can you tell us the best way to get there?" Xianghua asked cheerily.
"Take 21st Street until you get to Voldo's Voice Lessons and then turn right, you can't miss it!" Ivy said.
"Is there no other way?" Kilik asked. "Because…"
"AAAAAAAAAAGH! STOP TALKING!" Ivy said, her ears bleeding like a hemophiliac's. Kilik and Xianghua quickly left for their car to escape the couple and author that despised Kilik's voice.
"Have you talked to Cassandra yet Raphael?" Ivy asked, in her usual uptight manner.
"No I haven't yet dear, no", Raphael said, walking toward the kitchen. "I was waylaid by that irritating whelp an her annoying-voiced boyfriend."
"You just have no clue do you Raphael? My father always wondered how on earth we ever got together! Black magic, he says", Ivy said.
"Well he'd know wouldn't he… he's been to hell and back, literally", Raphael said, matter-of-factly.
"Just talk to Cassandra, Raphael", Ivy said and stomped out of the dining room and behind the office. Raphael rushed to the kitchen to find Yunsung putting the pots and pans in the sink while Cassandra was chatting him up.
"And I told him that I wouldn't be able to help him this Friday for the dinner", Cassandra said, whining.
"Well, you have other commitments. Link could easily help", Yunsung replied.
"Exactly, but he can't get over the fact that my sister needs me to watch her kids because that creepy girl always wants to play with them, so I have to defend them", Cassandra added.
"Family first!" Yunsung replied.
"Err… Cassandra?" Raphael asked. Cassandra, flustered, turned around to face her employer.
"Oh! Mr. Sorel, I… um… did you need something?" Cassandra asked nervously.
"Don't play dumb Cassandra", Raphael said dryly. "Ivy wants me to tell you to go pick up some lobster for Friday when the Germans come."
"Okay, I'll do it tomorrow", Cassandra replied and returned to talking to Yunsung.
"No Cassandra, Ivy's adamant about it today. Ever since she published that stupid book, she's gotten all high and mighty", Raphael said, urgently.
"Raphael, tonight I have to watch my sister's children, I can't go to the market today", Cassandra said, tiredly.
"I'll give you a raise", Raphael said.
"Off I go", Cassandra, said. "Lock up the kitchen please, Yunsung."
"Will do!" Yunsung said, grabbing a towel off the rack and wiping one of the pots down.
Cassandra exited the kitchen and ran into Ivy on the way toward the coat-rack.
"Hello Ms. Valentine", Cassandra said, taking her coat off the rack.
"Good afternoon Cassandra, did Raphael tell you about the lobster?" she asked.
"Yes he did, I'm running off to market right now", Cassandra said, putting on her coat and her bronzed helmet with the feathers.
"Oh dear, market's too far away, why don't you take the Aston?" Ivy said and tossed her the keys.
"Ms. Valentine, thank you so much!" Cassandra said, beaming.
"It's no problem, just bring it back in one piece. Be careful though, the brakes haven't been functioning properly because Raphael won't take it to the auto repair shop", Ivy said.
"I will!" Cassandra said and ran out to the car. Raphael came back out of the dining room, polishing Flambert and walked toward the bar.
"Raphael", Ivy called.
"Yes dear?" Raphael asked.
"What's this?" Ivy asked, handing over the local paper.
"It's an advertisement Ivy", Raphael said.
"It says, "If you are hunting Soul Edge, please stay at our hotel. For reservations contact Raphael and Ivy Sorel at 555-SOUL" I've told you time and time again not to do this", Ivy said, throwing the paper in the trash.
"I'm opening us up to a new market, my sweet", Raphael said.
"You know how I feel about Soul Edge fanatics", Ivy said, irritably.
"Your father is a Soul Edge fanatic, do you not like him?" Raphael asked.
"He hasn't hunted for Soul Edge in years, unlike you who plots about it every day", Ivy said.
"Oh don't be ridiculous", Raphael said.
"Go see Yoshimitsu at the newspaper's office and retract the ad", Ivy commanded.
"Fine, this means you have to see to the guests at dinner", Raphael said.
"You'll be back by then."
Raphael walked out to the parking lot to find the car missing.
"Where's the car?" Raphael asked.
"I lent it to Cassandra to go to the market to buy the lobster."
"What? The market's not that far, now we've lost good money on our petrol!" Raphael exclaimed.
"Don't be so frugal, Raphael", Ivy said, tiredly. "You can walk to the news office, it's good exercise."
"It's in the next town!" Raphael complained.
"Fine, take my bicycle", Ivy said.
"I can't ride that thing! You've possessed it with your evil magic! The last time we went on a bike ride, you left and it tried to run me over!" Raphael argued.
"At least it's a smart bike…"
"Fine, you win dear, I'll walk to town but if I'm late and the guests are complaining it's your own fault!"
"Raphael, if you keep arguing with me you won't be back for dinner."
Raphael grunted and walked out of the building and toward the newspaper office.
With Cassandra…
Cassandra's cell phone rang the theme tune to "Zorba the Greek" and she picked it up. It was her sister.
"Hello?" Cassandra asked.
"Hey sis, it's Sophitia. Rothion went out of town for business, do you want to go to the Holy Unction service with me next Wednesday?"
"What church?" Cassandra asked.
"Saint Demetria's."
"Ugh… I can't go there! That's where Astaroth is the priest and he's so obnoxious!" Cassandra said.
"Church is church Cassandra, plus the next church is far away."
"I like that church!"
"Then you have to drive", Sophitia said.
"I don't think I can go anyway Sophie, Mr. Sorel is having one of his special events at Sorel Towers that day and he's already reluctantly agreed to let me sit the kids on Friday", Cassandra explained.
"Okay, I'll find someone else to go with. Maybe Aeon will take me, but you know how he is with favors", Sophitia said.
"Maybe I can work it out, I'll talk to Ivy about it", Cassandra said. "Well, I'll see you later sis. Yiassou."
"Yiassou", Sophitia said and hung the phone up.
"Oh darn, another red light", Cassandra said, angrily. She slammed her foot on the brakes but the car kept going, in fact it went faster.
"What is going on?" Cassandra yelled, slamming her foot on the brakes. The car kept going and it skidded off the gate to a lower area of the town.
"AAAAAAAAAAAGH!" Cassandra yelled and crashed through a sweets shop, covering the windshield in chocolate. Then she swerved the car's steering wheel in a certain direction.
Raphael saw the car in the distance.
"Is that our Aston Martin?" Raphael asked, peering toward the road. "IT IS!" He tried to run but the Aston nicked him and sent him flying toward a store window. Cassandra slammed off another gate and was heading toward someone's house.
The car crashed through the roof of the house and through two stories until it landed nose-first on the ground floor.
"Who are you?" someone asked.
A/N: Whose house did Cassandra run into? Will Raphael cancel the advertisement? What Germans will be visiting Sorel Towers? Is Ivy going to go Summon Suffering on Raphael if he doesn't make it back for dinner? Find out in the next chapter!