Yeah I'm back!

Disclaimer-I don't own Naruto

I collapsed on Temari's porch. Being a lazy ass meant I didn't like effort. Somehow I had let Kiba talk me into the cross-country team so I should have been fine. Except Temari had forgotten to mention that her house was ten miles away! Somehow she had managed to keep a steady pace all the way there.

"HA! Guess you don't get out much do you?" She laughed in my face. I groaned loudly. Bad enough I got beat by a woman but did she have to rub it in my face? "Whatever you got me home safe now get out of the way! You're blocking the door!"

I groaned weakly. I had NO energy at all. I couldn't move. "N…no thanks, I'm fine right here."

"Fine, I was going to invite you in but since I can't get in I guess I'll just have to kick your lazy but out" I moved over so fast I ended up hitting the railing before I could stop. I flipped over the railing and landed in her bushes. "O…ow… that hur…" Was all I managed before I blacked out.

I woke up to Temari laughing, probably at me. I was on a comfortable bed so I didn't really want to move. Unfortunately she noticed I was awake. "Never seen anyone so eager to get in my house!" She laughed more. She poked me more while she laughed. She poked my ribs and I grunted.

"Don't do that please…" I muttered.

"Why not??" She teased, and poked me again, I grunted again. "Oh my god you're tickilish!" She squealed. And then she started tickling me.

"NO! Noooooo!!!!! Stoooopppp!!!!" I gasped for breath between laughs. I started flailing around trying to get her off me when…

"Why is your hand on my ass?" she asked. SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"B-b-because… I-I want you to get off?" I stuttered.

"Aww Shika you're blushing" She took my hand off her but.

Aww too bad SHIKA.

You again? Go away!

No man. You have no courage so now I'm being forced to step in I'm going to make your life hell because of it!

Hell no!

You know you want her so why not just do something about it?

Because she'd kick my ass if I tried to pull something!

God, you fucking pussy I'm taking over!

Hell no I'm me and I know what I want, and I do NOT want HER!

Keep telling yourself that, but remember I'm you and I know what I want.

"Uhh hello? Anyone home? Yo! Shikamaru?!" Temari was yelling at me. I was still blushing like crazy which was really annoying.

"Uhh yeah I… uh I should probably get out of here." I said as I got off the bed and walked towards her door. "I'll… I'll see you around okay?" I said when I got to the door. I could've sworn I saw a look of disappointment in her eyes, at least that's what I thought until.

"Yeah I'm sure, just get out you asshole." She growled pointed at the door.

I could not hate you more right now…

The next morning I got called into the principal's office. We had a strange principle. She was blonde and got a new botox injection every three months. She was very against the whole aging thing. She also kept tanks and tanks of slugs.

"Yeah Miss Tsunade?" I asked sitting in the middle of the room twiddling my thumbs.

"Shikamaru, about you guiding around miss Sabaku no Temari…" She started then paused.

"Yeah…?" I asked.

"I assigned Sasuke to guide her around."She said.

"WHAT!?!?" I shouted. "WHY?!"

"Well, as much as I love torturing you, this wasn't my idea. She requested a new guide."

"Ohh… ok…"

I will kill you asshole.

I walked out a little disappointed. I had hoped she wouldn't be mad considering I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT I DID! I didn't even know why I was disappointed this was what I wanted right?… right? NO! IT WASN'T! You little fucker! I kept shouting at myself until I saw her. She was walking down the hall with Sasuke. When she saw me she leaned closer to Sasuke and started flirting with him. I ran the other way as fast as I could. All I was thinking was Get out of here! I have to get out of here!! It hurt seeing her flirt with Sasuke.

"Hey kid you can't leave school!" the security guard called after me. I didn't care, I just wanted to get as far away from Temari as possible right now. I ran, and I ran, and I ran. I broke down in an alleyway. I didn't realize I was crying until I saw tears falling onto the pavement. Why was this happening to me? Why did I care? … Where was I? I looked around and realized I was near Temari's house. Actually right across the street from it.

"Hey, Gaara? You recognize this kid?" Someone called out behind me.

"…No" I turned around to see a tall brown haired boy with makeup on his face and a younger red haired boy with eyeliner.

"This is the asshole that made our sister cry yesterday." The older one said. "Let's teach him a lesson!"