Chapter Two

"You okay?"

"What do you think?"

Her master, usually not at all phased by anyone's outburst of anger or at the very least usually amused by it, cringed.

"Okay. Maybe that was a dumb way to put it," Anakin said sitting next to her on one of the rock formations in the Room of a Thousand Fountains. "Let me rephrase it. What's wrong? Besides… well you know."

Ahsoka smiled briefly, something she rarely did nowadays. There was nothing for her to smile about anymore, except when she was around her master. He understood somehow, made things better.

"It's nothing."

"Don't do this," Anakin said to her. "Don't shut everyone out. I know you find it hard to talk about, don't want to admit that it happened, but you've got to come to terms with it eventually, even if it's too painful and you're too ashamed…"

"That's not what's bothering me," Ahsoka said curtly not wanting her master to go any further. She wasn't ready to talk about that again. She was still dealing with nightmares every night. That was enough.

"Then what?"

She waited a while before responding, still debating whether to answer her master's question or not before finally deciding.

"Is the council going to expel me?"

Anakin reared back in surprise. "Who told you that? What gave you that idea?"

"Don't act like you haven't heard it. Everyone knows about what happened. That Anakin Skywalker's padawan might be emotionally and mentally scarred for life, that the council wonders if she's stable enough to be a Jedi still." Ahsoka spat.

"Ignore them. If anything you've proven your loyalty. To go through what you did, to not betray us, and now to live with the consequences—it would be wrong of them and even they can't deny it," Anakin said in a bitter tone.

"So they did discuss letting me go," Ahsoka stated bluntly.

Anakin paused and then admitted, "They think it might be for the best. I disagree."

Disagree was an understatement according to what Ahsoka had heard. She heard that her master blew up at the council, all thoughts of controlling his anger gone when they suggested that they should release Ahsoka from her services as a Jedi. Even if she couldn't go back on mission, the Jedi were her family, this was her home, and she had nowhere else to go.

"What if they do?" Ahsoka asked.

Anakin turned to her and put his arm around her shoulder, ignoring her flinch at his touch.

"They aren't going to, Snips. I won't let them and if they do, you don't have to worry. I'll personally make sure you're taken care of."

Ahsoka didn't know what that meant, but she trusted her master to see to his word.

Ahsoka blinked out her stupor as footsteps came to where she was. She raised the face marking over her eye left in curiosity upon hearing the ruckus that accompanied the footsteps. It seemed like someone else wanted to talk to the council too, and they were making quite the fuss about it.

"Senator Amidala. You can't—"

"I'll do what I very well please, and if you all won't request an audience with the council on my behalf, I'll do it myself."

Ahsoka saw a woman turn the corner. She had seen her before, but never really been acquainted with her other than shaking her hand at the senate when her master went there and briefly introduced them. After that, Ahsoka never crossed paths with the woman who was openly a very close friend of her master. It was almost as though he were keeping the two apart. Not that Ahsoka cared. She didn't particularly like politicians.

However, the Naboo senator looked oddly disheveled, at least compared to how she normally saw the woman dressed. She looked neat and presentable, but the robe she had on wasn't as elaborate as usual and didn't look like it needed two or three people to get on and off. Also, her brown curly hair wasn't piled atop her head in an elaborate braided hairstyle or headdress and instead fell down her back. She looked like someone who wanted to look neat but didn't have the time to prepare to the extent they usually did, like she had suddenly rushed out the door.

The senator went straight up to the Padawan guarding the door to the room and demanded, "I need to see the council."

"I'm sorry milady. But I can't allow you to-."

"I don't care what I'm allowed!" she said, voice raising. "This is an emergency."

Ahsoka decided to speak up at that point.

"Get in line, Senator," she said crossing her arms. "I was here first."

Senator Amidala regarded her only briefly before deciding that arguing with Ahsoka wasn't worth her time and continuing to demand entry into the council chamber.

Ahsoka smirked. While the Padawan was distracted, she'd just go in herself. She swiped her hand over the door, and it slid open for her. Not caring that she was about to interrupt the council in whatever they were talking about, she casually made her way into the room as though she were doing nothing wrong.

The senator and the Padawan noticed.

"You can't go in there," the Padawan said starting to go after her but the senator rushed past him and into the room behind Ahsoka; in fact, she nearly knocked the torgruta over.

"Wait a minute," Ahsoka said. Who did this high and mighty senator think she was?

"Sorry," the senator said, though it was clear she wasn't sorry about anything as whatever she wanted to address to the council was more pressing.

"Padawan Tano," Mace said sternly. "What is the meaning of this?"

"I don't know what she's here for," Ahsoka said while giving Senator Amidala a sideways glance. Then she turned her attention back to the council and added, "But whatever it is can be dealt with later. I can't wait."

"Neither can I," the senator said glaring at Ahsoka.

"Escort them both out," Mace ordered to the flustered padawan.

"No wait," both Ahsoka and Padmé exclaimed. "It's Master Skywalker. He's not dead!"

At that point Ahsoka turned to look at the senator and found that the older human woman was looking at her as well. A silent agreement passed between the two as they realized they had the same objective: convince the council that Anakin Skywalker wasn't dead.

Mace appeared to become a little more sympathetic as he looked at Master Yoda, who didn't say anything. Finally it was Obi-wan who spoke.

"I know this is hard on you Ahsoka," he said and then looked at the senator, "and I know you and Anakin were close Senator Amidala. But there is no use denying it."

"I'm not denying anything. He's not dead. He needs to be rescued. I felt him. He reached out to me," Ahsoka insisted. "We can't just leave him. If anything we have to send a team to investigate."

"Ahsoka," Obi-wan said patiently.

"No. She's right," the senator said from next to Ahsoka. "We have to send someone to investigate what happened. I think he's in trouble."

"And how would you know?" one of the other council members asked.

Ahsoka wondered the same thing, but the senator didn't miss a beat.

"It's not a well known fact, but although the midichlorian test on me came back that my count wasn't enough to be a Jedi, some would say that I am mildly force sensitive," she said. "Master Skywalker and I have been friends for over a decade. I would know if he were dead."

Everyone was silent before another master finally said, "We don't have the resources to spare on a mission that will only come to the same conclusion we've already come to. Even if we did, we have no reason to believe otherwise."

"But—"

Mace cut both Ahsoka and Senator Amidala off.

"Even Master Kenobi agrees, and he was Master Skywalker's former master."

Ahsoka, along with Senator Amidala, turned to look at Obi-wan.

"So you'll give up," the senator snapped, anger seeping through her tone. "Just like that!"

Ahsoka didn't give Obi-wan a chance to answer as she said, "Stop thinking with your head and the code. Search the force."

"You don't think I have?" Obi-wan asked quietly but still remained passive. "He's gone Ahsoka."

"Well you didn't look hard enough," Ahsoka said raising her voice. "You're supposed to be his friend. He's like a brother to you."

"Ahsoka," Obi-wan said with a sigh. "Please…"

Mace nodded at the Padawan, who grabbed onto Ahsoka's arm. Ahsoka hissed at him, allowing the natural predator torgruta instinct she normally suppressed and controlled to show.

"You don't have to escort me," she said as she snatched her arm out his grip. "I'm going. Not like you were any help anyway."

She didn't particularly care that she was going to be reprimanded for her outburst later, for losing control of her emotions and letting her temper get the best of her, but this wasn't right. The council didn't get it. When the entire order had been ready to let Ahsoka go because they didn't think she would ever recover enough from her ordeal to resume her duties, her master stuck by her and helped her in every way he could. She was not going to abandon him… She couldn't. Ahsoka began to shake as she took slow steady breaths with the effort to hold back her tears.

"Are you alright?"

Ahsoka turned to look at Senator Amidala who, although appearing stressed and seeming to want to cry herself, looked at her with concern etched in her features.

Ahsoka pulled herself together and dismissively said, "Yeah. Sure."

"You're lying."

Ahsoka was surprised by her straight forwardness.

"You're Anankin's Padawan right?" she asked.

Ahsoka huffed and said bitterly, "Used to be thanks to them."

Senator Amidala didn't respond, and Ahsoka started to walk away until she said, "Not used to. Not yet. There's someone else I think I can talk to. He's a close friend of mine."

Ahsoka wanted to snap at her that she didn't need her help, but at this point she was desperate. She was positive her master was alive, but she didn't know for how much longer.

"Mind if I come with you?" she asked.

"Are you supposed to be leaving the temple?"

Ahsoka shrugged. She never stayed at the temple when she was told to, even when her master told her to. The thought of all the trouble she gave him even when he was trying to help saddened her for a moment, but she quickly pushed it away. Being sad and sulky wasn't going to help.

"Are we taking my speeder or yours?"

Padmé was silent as they went to her speeder to head to the senate. She had never been acquainted with Anakin's Padawan before although she had seen her and been introduced. Anakin didn't talk about Ahsoka to her much. He mentioned her in passing, and that was it. Padmé knew she shouldn't have thought much of it as Anakin was fiercely loyal to her and had proven that over the years, but she couldn't help but think he was keeping the two women from getting to know each other. It had only been a fleeting thought, but sometimes she wondered especially three and a half years ago. About four months after he had gone to fight in the outer rim sieges not knowing when he would return, he came back. The weird part had been he hadn't immediately come to her, and when he finally did, he seemed distant, like his attention was elsewhere. He wouldn't tell her what it was and neither would Obi-wan when she asked him about it later.

Instead, she told him she was pregnant and whatever it was that had been bothering him, he forgot about it, at least around her as the only thing he could talk about around her was the baby or what they had thought was the baby, but turned out to be the babies. He stayed on Coruscant a long time, in fact his leave was indefinite, and Padmé never found out why. He just said that he was needed more on Coruscant. Then the war came to Coruscant when she was six months pregnant and he had gone to rescue the Chancellor. Two months after that, it was revealed that Palpatine was the Sith Lord, which uncovered an elaborate plot to take over the galaxy and kill the Jedi. With faith in the Republic shattered as they couldn't even discern their own enemy right in front of them, Padmé and Anakin decided to keep their marriage secret and remain true to their duty.

That was around the time his Padawan resurfaced, taking the galaxy by a storm with behaviors and tendencies that so contrasted the ideal image of the passive and calm Jedi. The holo-media had a field day with the girl's now flirtatious inclinations and rumors flew that the Master/Padawan duo was actually a pair of secret lovers. Anakin never said anything about it. In fact, he frowned and dismissed it anytime he heard it. But Padmé couldn't help wondering, especially being that she had just given birth and was feeling insecure about herself and body, not to mention he never brought Ahsoka around.

Finally, halfway to the senate, Padmé gave into her curiosity.

"How long have you known Master Skywalker?"

Ahsoka only turned her head slightly.

"Everyone knows my master. He's kinda famous," she said cryptically.

Padmé had a feeling she wasn't going to particularly like Ahsoka by the end of this, but she pressed on.

"I mean you personally. How long have you been his Padawan?"

"Six years give or take a few months," Ahsoka answered. "Why?"

"Nothing," Padmé replied. "I'm just curious. He's told me about you before."

Ahsoka glanced at her, but didn't reply. Padmé sighed. It seemed like Ahsoka was immune to the politician's trap she was trying to lay, so she tried another tactic.

"Anakin and I have been friends for years, since we were children," Padmé said to her.

"Yeah," Ahsoka answered.

It wasn't much, but it was a start…

"I have to say, he's the most loyal friend I've ever had. He's always stuck by me, even when we didn't agree, even through the war when he was always on a mission or rescuing someone, no matter what," Padmé said beginning to reminisce.

"Yeah," Ahsoka said and out the corner of her eye, Padmé noticed the girl smile a little as she leaned on her hand. "He's like that…"

This was the most reaction Padmé had gotten out of the girl and so she kept going.

"I hope he's alright. I would hate to lose him if there's a chance he's still alive," Padmé whispered.

Something between a scoff and a laugh came from the young woman, and Padmé glanced at her briefly before turning her complete attention back to the sky lanes.

"You know, for someone who's just friends with him, you seem really concerned about him," she said smiling.

"Of course I would be," Padmé said casually. "He's-"

"I know. Your friend. He's friends with a lot of people, but you didn't see them demanding an audience with the council and ready to fight a Padawan," Ahsoka pointed out as she sat up with her arms crossed. "In fact, you seemed to be pretty interested in what my relationship with him was. I wonder what your husband would say senator—an affair with a Jedi."

Padmé pressed her lips together to keep from letting her anger getting the best of her. How dare this child insinuate that, even if she wasn't married to Anakin and with someone else, she didn't have enough honor to be faithful to her husband?

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said. "I'm merely—"

"Curious?" Ahsoka asked. "Sure. So are you really just friends?"

"I don't think that's any of your business and even if it were true, at least it's not splattered all over magazines. Know anything about discretion?" Padmé asked bluntly hoping that Ahsoka would laugh in disbelief at the thought of someone believing what the presses spread to the public.

Instead Ahsoka only shrugged.

"What's the fun of having an affair if no one suspects you're having it?"

This took Padmé off guard. "What?"

"Oh yeah. It's fun to keep it secret. But it's even more fun when everyone suspects it, but it's still secret because there's no solid evidence. Casual flirting or something more?" Ahsoka said pretending to contemplate it as Padmé parked.

"It's something to think about isn't it?" Ahsoka asked as she got out the speeder.

Padmé took a moment to collect herself before doing the same. It was very likely that Ahsoka was just playing with her, stringing her along for her own satisfaction or even just joking around. But the girl had no clue how much it affected her. She had no clue that Anakin Skywalker was her husband, and the girl's playing, whether true or not, was having an effect on her. But Padmé pushed it aside. Ahsoka was a Jedi, and such a relationship would be forbidden amongst them. Then again, Anakin hadn't given it a second thought when they decided to get married.

Padmé shook the thoughts away. Anakin being missing was getting to her, that and the fact that she hadn't seen him in three months. She had to focus on persuading Bail to send resources to find him, but just like with the Jedi no luck.

"Bail please," Padmé said ignoring Ahsoka's raised face marking as she walked by her to where Bail was. "He's alive. I know it, and he needs our help. It's because of him that the Republic still exists, and we'd turn our back on him?"

Bail sighed. "Padmé, you're letting your personal attachment to him get in the way."

Padmé couldn't deny that he was right. He didn't know the extent of her relationship with Anakin, but he did know that she didn't have a husband on Naboo. He probably suspected that she had an affair with Anakin and he fathered the twins, but nothing more.

"Padmé, we've done all we can. I've done all I can without having to get the approval of the senate and they won't approve it with all the other crises going on. We don't have the-."

"This is a crisis!" Padmé exclaimed losing some of her famed senatorial composure.

"You don't even have any proof he's alive Padmé. I can't ask the senate to do this based on a feeling from you or his padawan when even the council doesn't believe it," Bail said and then put a hand on Padmé's shoulder sympathetically. "I'm sorry Padmé. That's all I can do."

"Bail-."

"Forget it," Ahsoka suddenly said from behind.

"What?" Padmé asked, turning to look at the young girl.

She didn't answer, only left the office. Padmé debated momentarily on whether she should go after her or stay and try to convince Bail before deciding to follow the younger woman. When Padmé didn't find her in the hallway, she assumed Ahsoka had gone back to the Jedi temple, but then Padmé found her pacing next to her speeder.

"Could you please hurry up?" she asked impatiently.

"What's the rush?" Padmé asked genuinely concerned for the girl.

"I need to go before Obi-wan comes looking for me. I don't need him messing up my plan," Ahsoka said as they slid into the speeder.

"Your plan?" Padmé asked, having a feeling she shouldn't start driving yet. "What plan?"

Ahsoka glared at her first, indicating that Padmé better start the speeder and get a move on. She sighed and cranked up the speeder before pulling out the space and heading for the sky lanes.

"Now back to this plan?" Padmé said trying to remain patient with her husband's Padawan. How did he deal with her on a daily basis?

"I'm going to look for my master."

Chapter Ending Notes:

So I got so much positive response to this story and I have the answers to some, if not all of your questions.

1) I sort of have an update schedule. I've decided to update a new chapter after I finishing writing another chapter. In essence, I'm writing chapter five of this story right now and once I finish it, I'll upload chapter three. I write pretty fast once I get into a story so we're probably talking about at least one chapter a week unless I get something like writer's block.

2) A few people asked me about Ruminations and as we speak, I'm also working on that story alongside this one and will probably put up the sequel just as soon as I finish uploading this story. So we're looking at a post date of around July? Maybe, the end of June even. We'll see how that goes. Depends on what I'm doing with my original story too.

3) For updates on how far along I'm coming with my star wars stories, or to even just geek out over stuff like the new star wars trailer that came out yesterday (OMG! I laughed! I cried! I couldn't breathe in excitement!) or just see what random stuff I might be posting from day to day or nag me and make me feel guilty about not writing when I should be writing, you can check out my twitter. It's my writing one, and I go by Holly Dae (at Holly_Dae_) on it. You can either search for it or find the link in my ff dot net profile.

Anyway, I realized it's been four years, FOUR YEARS, since I posted a Star Wars fanfic, not three. So if you missed me in all that time and enjoy my new story, drop a line or two or as many as you want in the review box right below this story. And if you're new to my stories, do the same so we can get acquainted. Hope you enjoyed this chapter.