Chapter 2: The friendship
How are friendships formed, or torn apart? Why do we always feel a need to gather in groups, to belong somewhere else than to our families? And what when you have no family left, and all your friends have all abandoned you, what then? This were all questions put on replay in the head of Draco Malfoy as he sat alone in his bed in the Slytherin Dorms. Everyone seemed to treat him like they treated their garbage bins nowadays, or their toilets, he was useless and sick of it. Still, he did not regret his actions during the past summer, during the second Great War. He knew that he had done what was right, even when the rest of the world told him that he had been out of line, right after the incidents that forever changed his life, people had been thankful to him. Now, they were resentful. Draco laid down on his bed with a deep sigh, none of this mattered to him anyway, the only opinion that he cared about was the one of the boy he had saved just a few weeks ago; Harry Potter.
Outside, the sun was shining brighter than it had done all summer. The teachers had decided to cancel all the classes before lunch due to the lovely weather and the fact that they knew that their students needed some time to catch up after a summer of horrific events. It was the first official school day of the year, and Harry spent it in the Gryffindor common room. Hermione and Ron were outside with the other seventh years spending their few hours off at the lake, sunbathing and swimming. Harry hadn't felt like joining them, after their late breakfast in the Great Hall he had returned to his bed, laying their for half an hour while everyone got ready to go outside.
"Are you sure you aren't coming Harry?"
Ron had asked him before he and Hermione left with Lavender, Parvati, Dean and Colin.
Harry had nodded and said something about having a nasty headache that would not go away by sun exposure. So they had left him there, and when he heard that the common room was empty, he had placed himself on a chair near a window from which he could watch his friends by the lake.
He hadn't joined his friends for two reasons, one; he needed time alone to think some very important things through, and two; he needed to find and talk to someone, alone.
As the watch that once had been given to him by his deceased godfather Sirius Black, turned eleven Harry had been sitting lost in his own thoughts for nearly an hour and he decided that he was going to snap out of it if he would ever make any sort of progress. As a reaction to that final thought, he went into his room and bended down under his bed, searched for a while but came soon up with what he wanted to find; The Marauder's map. Once again he seated himself in the common room, took a nervous breath before reaching for his wand which he pointed at the map, visibly shaking as he said with a voice that surely could have been steadier; I solemnly swear that I am up to no good! The map opened and small dots with names below them appeared all over it, just as he had expected most names were found in the area of the lake, even some teachers seemed to be down there enjoying the sunshine. But none of them were of any interest to him, he searched long and hard before he found the person he was looking for. There he is, Harry thought to himself as the dot of Draco Malfoy appeared in the Dungeons, the boy had just left the Slytherin common room and was walking in his direction. Yes, Harry thought a little surprised, looks like he's either heading towards the library, the Great Hall or…the Gryffindor common room. Why isn't he outside in the sun like the rest of the school? Harry wondered as he figured that the one who needed the sunshine most of all was that pale boy. As the Draco moved rapidly towards his direction Harry realized that there was no time to think, he had to act immediately if he ever wanted to speak to the Malfoy boy in private.
Draco passed by the portrait hole to the Gryffindor area feeling more uneasy than ever, his intention was to get to the library unnoticed by anyone and even though that seemed to be working so far, he had a lingering feeling of being watched. His Slytherin skills were still within him despite his changes over the summer, and he knew when he was being followed. He turned his head in one rapid movement, too rapid for his follower because he could feel someone bump into his back when he stopped walking. Though he couldn't see anyone…now how could that happen? Who was known by the entire school to have an Invisibility Cloak?
"Potter?" The name almost left his lips as a whisper, he suddenly felt very weak, like all his energy had been removed, he could feel the other boy move even though he couldn't see him.
"Yes", Harry answered without making himself visible.
Draco heard the word, he heard the voice that had been haunting him in his dreams and in his waken state of mind for seven years, and he fell down to the floor.
Harry was shocked as the Slytherin fell down on his knees shaking from head to toe, he didn't really know what to do but did what came naturally to him, tried to drag the boy back to his feet and helped him over to one of the couches in the hallway. He did all this without realizing that he still wore his cloak, he quickly removed it and looked at the pale boy with concern. Malfoy sat on the couch with closed eyes and a tormented expression on his face.
"Sorry", Harry said. "Did I scare you, that was not my intention."
The other boy just mumbled something inaudible, and slowly opened his eyes.
" I, you…" he said before failing to stand up. He fell down on the couch, Harry checked his pulse.
Oh no, he thought. He's passed out, but why? Did I scare him that much? No time to think, Harry grabbed the boy and rushed him to the hospital wing for Madame Pomfrey to look at him. While carrying him Harry noticed that the pale boy was lighter than he'd expected and thinner than usual. He also had a striking sensation of having experienced something similar not too long ago…but he had been the one to be carried.
He could feel strong arms around his waist, someone was carrying him. He tried to open his eyes, but saw nothing but a blurry mess. "Don't worry," a voice said soothingly to him, " You will be just fine, we will all be just fine". The voice made Harry feel even dizzier, he recognized that voice, he clinched to the arm of the boy who carried him, harder than before. It was the same voice that he had heard earlier, putting the death spell on the Lord of Darkness. But Harry could not remember who the voice belonged to, he tried to stay conscious, he forced his eyes to swing open, he saw skin as white as ivory and then he lost the battle with himself, once again.
Something wet was touching his face, he opened his eyes in disgust, only to see Madame Pomfrey putting a wet towel on his forehead, Draco Malfoy had never been that relieved in his entire life.
"How did I get here?" He managed to whisper, as soon as he felt strong enough to utter any words that could actually make sense.
"Well Mr. Malfoy, it seems that Mr. Potter brought you here a few hours ago after you had fainted in the hallway."
"Oh", Draco blushed. Had he passed out in front of Potter? He suddenly remembered it all, Potter had wanted to talk to him for some reason…but he had fainted before learning what that reason was.
"Yes," Madam Pomfrey said. "It's no wonder you lost consciousness, you don't seem to have been eating properly for ages Mr. Malfoy, am I right?"
Draco nodded, he hadn't eaten properly all summer, it had been difficult to gain any sort of apatite.
" I haven't slept too good either", he said.
"I could imagine that," Pomfrey said. "Bad dreams and memories I suppose?"
"Yes, it's like…every time I close my eyes, it happens again."
The nurse looked concerned and nodded compassionately.
"I will get you some sleeping potion, you must take it every night, it should reduce the nightmares and hopefully let you sleep through the night. And you must promise me to try and eat better."
Draco promised that he would and before he was left alone again he asked the witch where Harry was, because he wanted to thank him for bringing him to the infirmary.
He sat with you for quite a while actually, she answered. But he had to leave around lunch time, I guess the classes started again after lunch.
So he stayed with me, Draco thought as Madame Pomfrey closed the curtains around his bed and left him alone with his thoughts. Then at least, he can't hate me as much as I feared he would.
First lesson that day was Potions in the dungeons with Professor Tonks, and she was really glowing in her new environment. The students also seemed very accepting to this new addition to the staff, even the Slytherins worked hard and didn't make their presence more than merely noticed. Well, Harry thought, it's really hard for two people to make much noise even if they wanted to. Now Harry didn't think that either Blaise Zabini or Pansy Parkinson intended to make noise, or be an annoyance to the rest of the class. There had been some talk about why Malfoy hadn't showed up and Tonks had given him the third degree when she heard that he knew more about the boy's whereabouts than the rest of the class did.
"So he fainted", she said after Harry telling her the story." And why did you go after him in the first place Harry?"
"I…I just wanted to talk to him that's all."
"Well, that's better be all," the professor said before walking over to help Dean Thomas and Susan Bones with their speech potion.
A speech potion was meant to make the drinker speak louder and clearer and was said to be used during many hearings of death eaters over the year, together with the right amount of veritaserum. Susan Bones and the rest of her Hufflepuff classmates had joined the Gryffindors during Potions and would also accompany them on the rest of the classes that they shared the Slytherins.
Draco didn't attend any classes that day, but he was released from the hospital wing a few hours after his arrival. Not feeling ready to face the rest of the school in the Great Hall during dinner, he retreated to his Slytherin dormitory. Knowing that he should probably eat something, he decided to sneak into the Great Hall later that evening, when he knew that most students had already left.
Harry hadn't really felt like having supper that evening, the lessons had been very demanding so all of his friends were hungry and went to the Great Hall immediately after the last lesson with Lupin. Harry stayed behind in the classroom, wanting to speak to the professor alone.
"What's on your mind", Harry? Lupin asked.
"It's…you do know that I brought Malfoy to the hospital wing earlier today?"
The man nodded and sat down next to Harry.
"Yes, and I also know that he was released about an hour ago, I spoke to Madame Pomfrey before the start of this lesson." Harry felt relieved and let out a big sigh to show that relief.
"Good", he said. "But you should probably talk to him, since you are his head of house. Something's wrong with him."
"That, I am willing to agree on", Lupin said. "Are you sure that you have not played any part in making that wrong thing go worse?"
"Perhaps I have", Harry whispered and felt himself fill with rage and self-hatred. "But all I want from him, are answers, answers that you lot refuse to give me!"
By that he meant the Order of the Phoenix, which had been very careful not to tell Harry exactly all that occurred on that doomed night when the Final battle stood between the Light and the Dark.
"We have told you what is ours to know, the man answered and suddenly looked a lot older than he actually was. What Draco knows, and have told us, is not our business to tell you, it is his."
"I know, and that's why I want to talk to him!"
"You can not demand him to tell you things until he's ready, he'll come to you when he's ready, be sure of that Harry."
"I suppose so…but it's just so…hard! Not to know.."
"I know", Lupin patted the shoulder of the boy who he cared so much for, the boy who bore such resemblance to his childhood friend James." But now, Harry , it is time for you to go and get some supper, before they stop serving."
Harry looked at the time and saw that he was probably going to spend supper alone in the Great Hall since the rest of his classmates must have returned to the Common Room some time ago.
Indeed, the Great Hall was empty, Draco concluded as he sat there taking a bite on his bread. Suddenly he heard movement behind him, he turned to see that perhaps it was not as empty as he first assumed. Harry Potter had just entered the room, and he could feel the tension when emerald eyes met silver ones. Malfoy turned rapidly away from the grip that Potter's eyes had on him, and focused on his bread slice instead.
First the confusion, then the relief and then the pain of knowing that he had looked away. Harry Potter was thrown into a heap of emotions and he didn't know what to make out of a single one of them. He walked towards the empty Gryffindor table, then suddenly changed his mind, how silly wouldn't it look, two boys sitting on opposite ends of the large room. So, he swiftly turned and decided to sit at the Slytherin table, something he hadn't done ever before.
Someone sat down next to him, Draco could feel the other presence but he did not dare to look up at the boy. A hand on his shoulder made him completely loose all sort of composure and he shivered.
"Hello Draco", Harry said as calmly as he could. "I just wanted to apologize for earlier, I didn't mean to scare you like that."
"I, Draco inhaled sharply. It's no problem, it was not your fault, I've not been my self lately that's all, no need to worry about me Harry."
The boys suddenly realized that for the first time in seven years they were on first name basis, Harry dropped his hand from Draco's shoulder, a bit embarrassed by it all and started to eat. The two of them ate in silence, before Harry decided that there was no time like the present.
"Do you think", he swallowed another bite of meat before continuing. "Do you think we could be friends Draco, after all you did save my life."
Harry held out his hand to the pale boy next to him, in a similar gesture as the one that Draco had given him in the beginning of their first year. Draco took his hand and shook it, whilst trying to stop the shivers along his spine to spread across his whole body.
"We can be friends", he said with an unsteady voice. "But I really did not save you Harry, you saved yourself."
With that the Slytherin got up from his seat took his plate and walked out of the Hall leaving a confused Harry Potter to dwell on his own thoughts.