A/N: As always, sorry for the wait. There will eventually, at some point, be one more chapter to complete this little three shot. I hope you like this, thanks for being patient with me.
There are a lot of things Cass likes about college. She likes the campus, with its modern architecture and the strange sculptures that people lean against out on the quad. She loves the crunchy leaves on the sidewalk now that it's autumn. She loves her classes even though they're long and make her back hurt. She even loves dorm food, which, while not as good as her tía's pancakes, totally isn't as bad as everyone says.
Yeah, Cass likes a lot of things about college.
One thing she hates about college though is that she misses everyone she loves. Like a lot. She misses her tía because even though they fight a lot, it's totally the best part of Cass' day. She misses making fun of people together and watching Jersey Shore and trying to embarrass Santana as much as possible. Her tía is basically her best friend and it sucks not seeing her all the time.
She misses Brittany a lot too. She didn't realize how much she appreciated Brittany's laugh and the way Brittany constantly supports her and tells her how awesome she is until she didn't get to have those things every day.
One person she really misses, though, is her boyfriend. Sure, he's totally weird and like, freakishly tall and awkward, but somehow she fell in love with him and now she can't help but miss him all the time. She doesn't know what would possess a person to go to Kansas State University (Kansas is more boring than Ohio and that's saying something), but he did and now they're trying to make long distance work.
They Skype and text and it's not so bad, but sometimes she really just wants John's long arms to pick her up and squeeze her into his bony ribs. So it sounds a little weird, but like, it's comforting okay?
She knows that people think she's a bitch, but that doesn't mean she can't miss people just like everyone else.
It's just weird because she's never really had anyone to miss before.
Another thing that totally isn't the bomb about college is that her roommate, Margot, M-A-R-G-O-T, silent 't', is basically a nightmare.
Margot is majoring in digital art and you'd think she'd be completely absorbed in her Macbook Pro like, all the time, but no. Now, Cass likes to think she's normal because she uses her class time and free time during the day to work on her projects and her photo portfolio, but Margot says she's doing it all wrong. Apparently the best time do work and use the on-campus studios is at 2AM.
Cass is pretty sure Margot never sleeps and when she told Brittany this, Brittany said that Margot is probably a vampire.
"She totally dresses like one," Brittany laughed over the phone.
The thing is, Cass isn't sure if Britt was kidding, and she's actually only like, 98.5% sure Margot isn't a vamp.
She totally had a dream that she started carrying around a wooden stake and, while she was a super-hot Buffy-esque Slayer in her dream, she thinks maybe she's been drinking too much coffee since starting college. She's never really had such vivid dreams before.
So vamp status or not, Cass is definitely not Margot's number one fan.
Especially on days like today.
It's not that a lot of big things have been happening, but she's just had a pretty shitty day. First, she locked herself out of her room this morning when she went to take a shower in the community bathroom and forgot her room key back in her dorm. She had to go down to the front desk in her towel to get a temp key, and granted, it was 6AM so nobody saw her except the dude working the front desk, but still. It totally sucked.
Then her professor shot down her idea for her photography portfolio. She didn't work that hard on it and she'll agree that her idea wasn't very original, but it's going to be a pain in the ass to draw up another sample board.
And to top it off, she hadn't talked to John except for texting for like a week and a half and when she finally Skyped him today, he was more involved with checking his Facebook than talking to her. So she's kind of pissed about that.
So excuse her if she has a short fuse when Margot comes in and starts yapping to her about some drama in her drawing elective. It's not that she doesn't care it's just… well yeah. She doesn't care.
"So then Larsen turned to the kid next to me and was like, 'Mr. Williamson, my four year old daughter could surpass your skill in three-dimensional shading.' And the whole class was just like, holy shit. And the kid turned bright red and stormed out, probably to go complain to his fuckin' boyfriend or something."
Cass rolls her eyes. "Sounds rough," she drawls, trying to pretend she gives a fuck, which yep, she still doesn't.
Margot snorts. "I can tell you're enthralled with my life."
"I've heard my aunt's friend Puck tell more interesting stories, and let me tell you, he got a few too many concussions playing high school football. I mean he tells people to call him Puck." Margot looks affronted. "Sorry, not sorry," Cass snaps.
"Someone forgot to take their happy pills today."
Cass clenches her fingers together and takes a deep breath. She's been working on her rage issues and is trying to follow Brittany's advice and just give Margot a chance. Ugh, fuck it.
"Yeah, sorry," she sighs. "I'm having a shitty day."
"Yeah, well don't take it out on me, Cass." Margot hops up on her bed across from Cass', her legs dangling over the side, looking at where Cass is propped up against the wall. "You want to talk about it?"
Cass shrugs, still mad that she gave in and apologized. "I don't know."
"It's not good to keep things bottled up." Margot claps her hands twice. "What's up?"
"It's just my boyfriend," Cass mutters, unaccustomed to talking about these things with people her age. She scrunches her nose. Maybe she needs more friends besides her tía, Brittany, and Quinn.
"Ah," Margot says knowingly. "You're feeling sexually repressed because of the distance."
Cass' eyes widen instinctually. "What? No! Well, I mean…" She shakes her head. "Okay no, that's not the issue." She suddenly knows how her tía feels when she tries to embarrass her.
Margot shrugs like this isn't the most personal conversation they've had the last month. "So what's the problem?"
She sighs. "I don't know, he's being weird. Like when we text he always has to go because he's busy."
Margot stops swinging her legs. "So maybe he's busy."
"Yeah, but…" she's struggling to put the problem into words but it's itching inside her. She feels like her stomach is bubbling, everything in her gut telling her something's not right. "So, we haven't talked in over a week and when I finally got him on Skype this afternoon, he just kept laughing at someone he was messaging on Facebook."
"Hmmm," Margot says.
"Yeah," she replies meekly.
"He's going to break up with you." Margot says it so matter-of-factly that Cass leans her head back in surprise and hits it on the wall.
"Ow. Fuck. Wait what?"
Margot shrugs nonchalantly. "Dude it's over."
"What, no. We've been together almost a year and half." Cass clenches her jaw angrily. "You don't even know him."
Margot sighs, her palms coming to rest on her bed sheets. "Listen, I know it sucks. But this is College Break-Up 101. Same thing happened to Matthew from across the hall and his girlfriend."
Cass rolls her eyes. "They'd been together like 5 months."
"I'm just saying." Margot lifts her hands up as if to placate her. "Happened to me too. When I was a sophomore, I started dating this guy, Todd. He was a junior. We stayed together some of his junior year and all of his senior year, but after that he went to college. We didn't last a month after that. He dumped me three weeks before our two year anniversary."
Cass feels her shoulders droop. "Really? That sucks."
Margot laughs. "It's fine. I mean, I was kind of depressed at first, but I got over it. It's easy to see now that there were a lot of things that weren't that great about us that I couldn't see while I was in the relationship. Like, he couldn't even appreciate the necessity of the Star Wars prequels. I mean, I know everyone says they're not as good as the originals and that may be true, but they're still a crucial part of the saga and like hello, Natalie Portman and Ewan McGregor? Total babes. Hayden Christiansen is pretty hot too. And besides, the Romanticism in those movies is classic! Total nineteenth century themes in an out of context world. Like, that's fuckin' awesome."
Cass blinks a few times, unsure of what to say.
"Sorry," Margot says. "I'm like, really fuckin' passionate about Star Wars."
"Okay…"
"Anyway. I'm just saying. It's totally possible. You need to either talk to him about it or brace yourself for an inevitable breakup."
"What am I supposed to say? 'Hey John, how's it going? Yeah, so I was wondering if you were going to break up with me.' Margot, I can't just ask him that."
Margot purses her lips sympathetically. "It sucks, right? You just have to do it."
"I don't want to," Cass replies, sounding like a whiny five year old even to herself.
"Fine, but don't come crying to me when you are a newly dumped single woman, because I am a very big supporter of the I-told-you-so."
"Fuck you," Cass snaps.
"And you as well!" Margot chuckles and hops off her bed. "Dude I'm fuckin' starving. Let's get Matthew and go eat dinner."
"Yeah, okay," Cass grumbles and crawls off her own bed. "I hope it's grilled cheese night. Anything but meatloaf."
Margot shakes her head. "Pretty sure it's meatloaf."
Cass sighs. Shittiest day ever.
John breaks up with her two weeks later. He has Fall Break mid-October, so he flies back to New York and makes the trip to Brooklyn to see her.
"I just think we're in different places now," he says gently as she digs her nails into her palms and forces herself not to cry. She is Cassandra Velasquez and she does not cry.
"Well, we'd be closer if you didn't go all the way to fucking Kansas," she spits out.
He looks at her, his lips thinning sadly. "You know that's not what I mean."
She nods and looks anywhere but at him. "Did you meet someone else?"
"No, Cass, that's not it." He tries to put his hand on her arm but she shakes him off. He sighs and holds his hands up in surrender, knowing better than to reason with her when she's upset. "There's just so much out there. I really need to find myself and just be me. I'm experiencing so much and I think we both just need to do our own thing."
"We can't do our own thing together?" She finally meets his eyes and everything inside her feels like it's on the verge of collapse. How did she let herself get like this, so dependent on a boy?
John sighs. "I can't Cass."
She nods in resignation, but can't bring herself to say anything.
"I really want to still be friends…"
"Fuck you," she manages to choke out.
"Cass, come on."
"No, you come on. Fuck you, John. Fuck you."
"Fine," he snaps. "I really care about you. You mean a lot to me, Cass. If you can't be mature enough to act like an adult and be friends then fine."
"Fuck you," she says again. Like, she literally has nothing else to say.
He stands up from her desk chair where he was sitting and puts his jacket on. "Fine. Bye Cass."
She says nothing, just watches as he walks out of her dorm room, feeling like she could HulkSmash everything within ten feet.
She's still sitting in the same place when Margot comes back two hours later.
She takes one look at Cass' face before sighing and leaving again. She comes back ten minutes later with two coffees, handing one to Cass and sipping on the other one.
"You'll stop feeling so shitty about it soon," Margot says.
Cass just grunts.
There's a long pause where both of them just drink their coffee. They stare at one another until Margot shrugs apologetically. "Sorry, but I told you so." Cass scowls.
"Fuck you."
She has her own Fall Break the next week. Margot, who came to New York all the way from Los Angeles, is staying at school, but Cass leaves her tiny dorm room and takes the subway back to Manhattan in favor of spending some time with her tía.
She spends the week lounging around on the couch watching Jersey Shore and absentmindedly sketching. Sometimes she works on school stuff, but mostly she just pretends she doesn't have it and wills it to not cause her stress later.
When Santana works at the bar, Cass tags along and sits in her usual corner. Puck places a beer in front of her with a wink.
"Don't tell Santana," he says.
"She's going to see, Puck," Cass complains, but she sips at the bottle anyway.
Puck shrugs. "You're in college now. She'll get over it." He smirks. "Plus, she was your age when she first came in here, looking moody and shit just like you are right now."
"I'm not moody," Cass retorts, even though she kind of is. She misses stupid John and can't stop wishing that she didn't.
Puck just winks again and goes to help another customer. When Santana wanders over to her corner later and sees an empty beer bottle in front of her, she just shakes her head and plops another one down, muttering something about breakups and booze. Cass doesn't quite catch it, but she's kind of glad that nobody really brings up the breakup. She just doesn't want to talk about it.
One night, when it's particularly cold outside and frost blows foggy air on the windows of the bar, Quinn sits down next to her and Cass feels a calming familiarity settle into her bones. They talk about nothing interesting besides school and photography, but Quinn tells her that she should stop by the studio the next day and have some fun. She only has two days before she has to go back to school so she decides to make the most of it.
She forces Santana to come with her and when they're walking there, she gets a really awesome idea. Santana has been strangely cautious around her and she knows it's because of the breakup, but she doesn't feel that awful, just a little down, and she just wants her tía to act normal.
"Can you please stop being all weird," she says as they step out into the chilly air. The sun is trying its hardest to peek through the clouds and provide warmth, but it's not really succeeding.
"What?" Santana looks at her.
"I'm not fragile, okay? Just… stop giving me that 'poor Cass' look."
Santana shrugs. "I don't know what you're talking about," she replies, but stops looking at her like that and Cass breathes a little easier.
"Cass, where are we going?" Santana asks after a minute of walking.
"To see Quinn," Cass says. That's when she gets her awesome idea. "Here," she says, and gently takes her camera out of its bag before handing it to Santana.
"What am I supposed to do with this?" Santana looks at the camera like it's a foreign reptile or something, her nose crinkling half in disgust and half in incredulity. Cass giggles.
"Oh, right, I forgot you're like, ancient. Okay, Grandma," she says exaggeratingly slowly. "This is a camera. When you click the button, it takes a picture and forever captures an image on paper. Like magic."
Santana rolls her eyes. "Shut the fuck up." Cass just smirks. "But seriously."
"Well, Quinn is letting me develop some pictures in her dark room. It's really cool. So I don't know. Take some pictures and I'll show you how to do it."
"That's stupid." Santana tries to hand the camera back to her, but she pouts out her lip like Brittany taught her.
"Please, Tía."
"No," Santana deadpans. Then she looks at her and scowls. "Don't pout at me like that." Cass pushes her lower lip out further. "I can't be persuaded by that." Cass makes puppy eyes, turning her pout on its highest setting. "Ugh I hate Brittany for teaching you that."
She holds up the camera and snaps a picture of Cass' face. Cass just laughs and claps her hands together. "Cool, now let's get to work."
"What should I take a picture of?"
Cass shrugs. "Anything you want, I don't care."
They walk along the street, weaving in and out of business people hustling to work and tourists gaping at everything. Santana takes pictures as they walk and Cass knows they won't be very artistic, but she's excited anyway. She feels the rush and freedom that walking down the New York streets hasn't given her in a long time.
When they finally get to Quinn's studio, Cass looks up at the old brick building and smiles, happy to be back in a place where she learned so much and felt so carefree.
She pushes on the door and a little bell somewhere above her tingles to announce their presence.
Cass waves at the secretary behind the desk and moves down the hall to Quinn's office. She doesn't even make sure Santana is following her. She just needs the keys to the darkroom ASAP.
The door to Quinn's office is half open and Cass knocks carefully before poking her head in. Quinn is behind her desk, her face close up to her computer screen, eyes squinting carefully.
"Quinn," Cass says, effectively startling her mentor. Quinn's hands twitch on her keyboard, almost knocking over her coffee.
"Geez, Cass." Quinn's hand comes up to her chest. "You scared me." Her face breaks out in a smile and she stands up and hugs Cass. "How are you?"
Cass shrugs. "Okay I guess."
"So this is where you work, Fabray."
Cass pulls out of the hug and looks back at Santana, who has crinkled her nose in judgment at the tiny office.
"At least it's not behind a bar, Lopez," Quinn snipes, and Cass rolls her eyes.
"Right, well, I'm going to go develop these now. Don't come in the dark room unless the light outside is off," she tells Santana and grabs the keys from the hook on Quinn's wall. She hears her tìa and Quinn snarking at each other as she drifts down the hall and shakes her head.
Cass moves habitually around the darkroom, her hands automatically going to the right bins and chemicals, her fingers skillfully handling the film. They have several darkrooms on campus, ones that are much nicer than this, but there's something perfect and homely about being back in the place where she learned it all. She smiles with the familiarity of it.
When the first batch is done developing she peeks her head outside to find Santana leaning against the wall and looking at something on her phone.
"Hey," Cass says, prompting her tìa to look up, a goofy smile plastered on her face.
"Oh hey. Quinn had to go to a shoot. She said to just put the key back when you're done."
Cass nods. "What are you looking at?"
"Oh," Santana says, and glances back down at her phone. "Nothing really. Just a text from Britt."
"Gross." Cass scrunches her nose and Santana rolls her eyes. "Want to develop some?"
Santana looks at her skeptically. "I don't want to ruin anything."
Cass snorts. "They're your pictures. They're probably ruined already."
"Oh fuck you," Santana says, but smiles anyway. "When are you going back to school? You're a pain in my ass, you know that right?"
Cass shrugs. "Yeah I know. So do you wants to learn or not?"
Her tìa does that little scrunchy face that reminds Cass of her mom. "If you insist."
So it takes Santana a little while to get the hang of it, and her first batch comes out white washed, but her second batch looks pretty awesome. They laugh at the pictures on their way home, Cass remarking on how shitty most of the pictures are (there's like, five of the sidewalk) and Santana cursing at her most of the time. It's the most fun Cass has had in ages.
"Hey this one is cute," Santana says as they're punching in the door code to their building.
Cass glances at the picture as she pulls open the door and immediately scowls. "Hey, give that here."
Santana jerks it away. "No way. I'm making Britt hang it on the wall. This is my masterpiece!"
"Tìa!"
Santana laughs and lunges through the door. Cass catches up to her as Santana goes to unlock their apartment deadbolt. Santana tries to hold it out of reach, but Cass, while still short, isn't as tiny as her tìa and yanks it out of her hands.
"Ugh you're such a party pooper," Santana mutters.
"Whatever," Cass grumbles, staring down at the picture of herself, goofy smile plastered on her face as she looks out at the city. She doesn't remember Santana pointing the camera in her direction, but this picture is way too sappy for the public eye. Cass decides to destroy it immediately.
She follows her tìa through the door and into the kitchen.
"Hey Britt," Santana says happily, and Cass is pretty sure she'll never get over that look they give each other. Like geez, it's been like five hours since they've seen each other.
"Hey babe."
"Did you get it? Let me see!"
Cass finally looks up from the picture in her hands and sees Santana and Brittany leaning over a box on the kitchen table. She sets the picture on the table and looks in the box.
"Oh my God!"
"Meow," says the tiny creature and Cass is really confused.
"It's a girl," Brittany says. "And her name is Madam Millie."
Cass eyes Brittany. "Madam Millie?"
Britt shrugs. "Okay, just Millie, but doesn't she look majestic to you? Totally a Madam."
"You're totally right, B," Santana chimes in, pulling the cat out of the box and scratching behind her ears. "Genius."
Cass rolls her eyes. "Okay… so why did you get a cat?"
Brittany eyes her like she's crazy. "Ummm, why wouldn't we get a cat?"
"Just look at her," Santana says, placing her in Cass' arms.
Madam Millie is bright orange with beady eyes and white sock-paws. She stands on end in Cass' arms, clearly uncomfortable. Cass isn't sure she's a cat person. She hands the cat to Brittany.
"Right. You guys just got way more married and way more gay."
"Aww cheer up Cass! Most kids would die for a pet like Madam Millie," Santana says, smiling all gooey-like at her wife holding a cat. Cass glares.
"I'm going to take a nap."
"Say bye to Cass, Mills," Brittany sing-songs, making the cat wave its little paw farewell.
"Oh my God," Cass mutters under her breath. In her displeasure to escape the scene, she forgets the picture on the table and gets in a screaming match with her tìa when she finds it framed on the wall the next day.
"So then, Larsen was all, 'Ms. Henderson, I can see from your recent portfolio that this school has seriously lowered its acceptance standards' and Sammie told him he could shit on her portfolio for all she cared and stormed out of the class!"
"He said that to a student?" Cass absentmindedly asks as she sits on her bed across from Margot and shades in her sketchbook.
"Yeah dude, I'm not kidding. It's fuckin' unbelievable how much of a dick he is."
She's been back for a week and is feeling a lot better after her break away from school. Now that she's back she realized she even kind of missed Margot and her endless gossip.
"I'm glad I don't have him."
"I just hope I don't get on his bad side." Margot shakes her head. "Anyway. What are you doing this weekend?"
Cass raises an eyebrow. "The same thing I always do. Go to Matthew's and play Assassin's Creed."
"Dude," Margot whines. "You need a life. We're young, we're in New York. We need to get out there!"
Cass snorts. "You keep forgetting that I've lived in New York for a while."
Margot rolls her eyes. "You're like an old lady. Come to a party with me."
She finally looks at Margot. "A party? What kind of party?"
"Dude, I don't know. A party. A fun party!" Margot swings her legs over the edge of her bed, leaning closer to Cass. "Come on."
Cass purses her lips. She hasn't really been to any parties this year. She kind of stopped partying in high school. It could be fun though.
"Yeah, okay. If Matthew comes, too."
Margot fist pumps. "Yes! He already said he would."
Cass rolls her yes. A party with Margot. Should be great.
The party is at this loft a few minutes away from the school. They walk and as soon as they get there, Matthew ditches her and Margot, making a beeline for the dance floor.
"Loser," Margot hisses and Cass barely hears her over the music. "Whatever. Let's get something to drink."
They head for the kitchen, pushing through people mingling about and chatting with their friends. Cass follows Margot to the booze table, watching as her friend pours two shots of some nasty looking Burnett's into some Dixie cups.
"You ready for a fuckin' kick ass night?" Margot hands Cass the shot and she eyes it warily, but shrugs in anticipation. She grins and they tap their makeshift shot glasses together.
"Let's do this."
Cass groans. She's drunk. Like drunk super a lot. Like drunker than a drunken drunky drunk. Blargh.
And she's talking to this girl she met, Margot's friend from class, and ohmygod she can't stop staring at the girl's eyes because they're this awesome blue that's so dark she swears they're black. Did she think that? Yes she is very drunk.
"He basically said I suck and I told him he could shit on my portfolio for all I cared."
"That was you?" Cass giggles and continues to stare at this chick's – Sammie's – eyes. They're just so… blue.
"Yeah," Sammie shrugs weakly. "Not one of my proudest moments."
Cass wrinkles her noise in dissent. "I think it was awesome. He's a douche."
Sammie laughs gently. "You think so? I'm not totally stupid for basically ensuring I fail the class?"
"No way," Cass says in between drinks of the beer she's slowly sipping at. "I think it's awesome."
"Well," Sammie grins in the cutest way Cass has ever seen a person grin probably. "I think you're awesome."
Cass grins back. "I mean, obviously."
Then the girl's blue eyes get closer and Cass sets down her beer and a little voice in her head squeaks ohmygod and then she feels lips on hers that are super soft and gentle.
Ohmygod.
Sammie pulls back, a red glow on her cheeks. "Sorry, you're just super cute. I hope that was okay. Sorry."
Cass kind of has her mouth open, and she's totally staring at the girl's lips, but then she looks up at her eyes again and clears her throat. "No, it's okay. I mean." She shakes her head. "Whoa."
"Whoa like good, or whoa like bad?" Sammie looks at her warily, her fingers playing with the bracelets on her wrists.
Cass gingerly pokes at her lips with her fingers. "Whoa like good. Like I've never been gay before but like, whoa."
Sammie snorts, but Cass can tell she's hiding a relieved smile behind it. "I think you're drunk."
"Yes. Yes I am," Cass says. She sways a little and giggles.
"Do you need help getting home?" Sammie quirks her eyebrows and Cass stares. Ohmygod.
"Probably. That'd be coosome. Cool. Awesome. Shoot." Cass grabs her forehead. "Oh my God, you're right. I'm drunk."
Sammie laughs good-naturedly. "You're cute."
Cass scowls, pushing herself off the couch. Sammie grabs her arm to keep her from stumbling. "I'm cool okay."
"Aye aye Captain Cool."
"Is that my official title? I like it."
They make it to the door and outside, but everything is a blur after that.
When Cass wakes up, she immediately realizes she isn't in her own bed in the dorms. It's much comfier and much bigger.
She also remembers that she totally kissed a girl and she totally kind of liked it. Katy Perry has nothing on her.
And now she's kind of freaking out.
"Oh my God." What would her tìa say? She'd laugh her fucking ass off. Ohmygod. She forces herself to calm down. She's just a girl right? Brittany didn't like girls before she liked Santana. It's not weird. It's fine.
She sits up, noticing she's alone in the bed. Okay, alone, check. Not at home, check. She scooches to the end of the bed and swings her legs off the edge, but pulls them back when she almost steps on a disembodied arm.
She almost screams, but manages to turn it into a squeak when she realizes the arm isn't disembodied, but belongs to the girl from the night before, who is dead asleep on the floor. Carefully, Cass steps onto the carpet and to other side of the girl. Sammie, Cass reminds herself. With the blue eyes.
She stands there for a second. Should she leave? No, her tìa would shit her pants with laughter if Cass told her she had a gay one night stand. No, wait. She didn't sleep with this girl right? She racks her brain, and she definitely didn't black out, but after leaving the party, her memory is kind of fuzzy. She's pretty sure she didn't sleep with Sammie though. She's wearing her shirt and underwear still and she thinks that's kind of something she would remember.
Cass looks around and notices her jeans thrown over the back of a desk chair in the corner of the room. She could put them on and leave… But then she looks down and feels bad. The girl slept on the floor. And she was really nice. And a good kisser. And she had such a nice laugh. And the bluest of eyes. Dammit.
Cass sighs and quietly lays down on the floor, her head coming to rest next to the girl whose bed she slept in. Her face presses into the carpet, and she's glad that Sammie has hers on a pillow. For the first time, Cass really looks at the girl, her sober eyes and the light seeping through the blinds giving her an opportunity to truly see her.
Sammie has dark hair, darker than Cass', and skin so pale Cass can practically see the blood beneath her cheeks. Multitudes of freckles cover her forehead, cheeks, and nose. Currently, the girl has her mouth open, her face smushed into her pillow. It's extremely unattractive.
Cass thinks it's super adorable.
"Hey," she whispers. The girl doesn't move. "Ummm. Sammie. It's me Cass. Please wake up."
Suddenly the girl's eyes jolt open.
"Oh my God."
Cass smirks. "That's what I said too."
Sammie lifts her head an inch off the pillow before slamming it back down, face first. "Ouch. Oh my God. You're still here." She groans a little and Cass frowns, but feels slightly relieved.
"Oh. Sorry. I can go if you want…"
"No!" Sammie's hand shoots out and grasps Cass' wrist. "Sorry. I just… fuck. I have… I'm… can you get me some Advil? Sorry." Her grip on Cass loosens, and she blinks one eye open again.
"Sure…"
"Thanks. It's on the desk." She closes her eyes again, grimacing, and Cass gets up to get the pills. She sees the bottle on the desk, noting how neat and organized everything in Sammie's room is. She sits back down, leaning her back against the wall, and opens the pill bottle. She shakes out two little tablets.
"Here you go," she says gently. Sammie takes them from Cass, groans again, then jams them down her throat. She sticks her tongue out after she swallows them dry.
"Thanks," Sammie whispers.
"No problem."
"I get the worst hangovers, that's why I barely ever drink. I don't even have to be drunk and I can drink enough water to fill a pool and I'll still feel like shit the next morning." Sammie smiles meekly. "It's the worst."
Cass chuckles. "That sounds like the worst."
"How do you feel?"
Cass shrugs. "Fine, just tired." She hesitates. "And a little confused. We didn't… you know. Right?"
Sammie smiles calmly. "No. We got outside and then you were having trouble walking and like, would not tell me where you live. So I just brought you back to my place."
"Oh." Cass nods. "Okay. I mean, I figured I would've remembered. I just… yeah."
"Totally," Sammie nods. "Right. Anyway. Sorry. I know this must be awkward and like, we were really drunk. Sorry again."
Cass raises her eyebrows. "It's fine. And it's not that awkward."
"Really? Because I'm super awkward. The most awkward. And I'm sure you're not even like, into me or probably not even into girls in general so… yeah." Sammie covers her eyes with her hand. "See. I'm like the most awkward. My brain. It doesn't know when to turn off. Oh my God."
Cass smiles, finding the awkwardness really endearing. "It's cool," she says. "And I mean, you have really pretty eyes."
Sammie pulls her hand away and looks at Cass. Her cheeks turn a violent shade of red. "Thanks. You're like, super cute."
"Hey, I'm cool remember."
"Oh right," Sammie grins. "Captain Cool."
"Damn right," Cass laughs out. "Cool as a cucumber."
Sammie snorts. "Right."
"I'm Cass by the way. We can meet properly now."
Sammie smiles. "Samantha Henderson. I just go by Sammie."
"Cool," Cass says. "You have class with Margot. She's my roommate."
"Oh yeah. Margot's nice."
"Yeah, she's cool."
"Yep."
They look at each other and Cass scrunches her nose as the silence swallows them. She tries to think of something to say, but Sammie beats her to it.
"Sorry again, for last night. I'm… kind of, like, new to this."
"New to what?"
Sammie smiles awkwardly, her cheeks turning pink again. "Girls."
"Oh," Cass laughs. "I mean, yeah. Me too. I'm not, you know, gay. I mean my tìa is, but I haven't really ever thought about it. So yeah."
"Hmmm," Sammie smiles gently. "I mean, I've always known. I just haven't ever actually…" She trails off and Cass feels her heart soften in a weird way. This girl is totally cute.
"You haven't ever actually been with one?"
"Yeah," Sammie nods.
Cass smiles encouragingly. "That's okay. You might want to try not being drunk though. You might be sad if you change that and have a bad hangover to ruin your morning-after glow."
Sammie chuckles, voice raspy. "Yeah. Maybe not." She peeks at Cass again. "It's not so bad right now. If the person isn't bad, I guess."
Cass feels a clever reply building in her throat, but it dies on her tongue. She feels her stomach jump once. "You're not so bad either." She glances away awkwardly before looking back at Sammie. "And you, um, you could've slept in the bed you know. I wouldn't have minded."
"Oh," Sammie says. "Nah, that would've been rude."
"I wouldn't have thought so."
Sammie shrugs. "Next time then." Her eyes widen. "Shoot I mean. Oh my God." She covers her eyes again. "Sorry, I'm not usually this awkward I swear."
"It's fine," Cass grins. "Next time."
By the look on Sammie's face, Cass isn't the only one surprised at her response.
Ohmygod.
So Cass puts her pants back on and they sneak past Sammie's roommate who's passed out on the couch in their living room. They wander down a few blocks and go to this bagel place that's not crowded with tourists. They both get bagels and Sammie gets an orange juice while Cass gets the biggest cup of coffee the place sells.
Cass learns that Sammie is studying film, but is taking drawing as an elective. She's a sophomore and from Michigan and prone to blushing. Cass thinks she's the most adorable person she's ever met.
She talks mostly about her tìa and Brittany, and Sammie smiles at her like what she's saying is really interesting and not totally dorky, which Cass appreciates.
"Thanks for the bagel," Sammie says as they're walking back toward Cass' dorms.
"No problem, it's the least I could after you slept on the floor."
Sammie rolls her eyes and nudges Cass, who bumps into a dude in a suit rushing down the sidewalk. "Watch where the fuck you're going," the guy throws over his shoulder.
"Fuck you too, asshat," Cass yells back. Then she looks at Sammie and they both laugh. "Sorry, I'm kind of a bitch."
Sammie shrugs. "You seem nice to me."
"Oh yeah, well I guess…" she trails off. "Maybe I am hungover."
"Maybe," Sammie says, but she shakes her head and smiles like she thinks Cass is cute still. Which like, no. Cass is the coolest.
"Well, thanks for walking me back," Cass says once they get to her dorm.
"Of course." Sammie tucks a strand of hair behind her ear shyly. "It was nice meeting you, Cass."
"I uh. Yeah." She grins. "You too, Sam."
Sammie's cheeks heat up. Cass still thinks it's the cutest thing.
"Well," Sammie says awkwardly. "See you around." She waves and turns to go back the way they came from, her black hair catching the feeble sunlight in waves.
"Hey," Cass yells suddenly.
Sammie spins back around. "Hey?"
"Do you…" Cass clears her throat. "Do you want to go out sometime?"
Sammie shifts her eyes carefully, her eyebrows shooting up questioningly. "Go out? Like…?"
Cass grins. "Like on a date!"
Sammie's nose crinkles. "A date?"
"Yeah, you know. Kinda like what we just did, except nicer and even more awkward."
Sammie snorts. "I don't think I could get more awkward honestly."
"Well," Cass says. "I probably could. What do you say?"
"Are you sure?" Sammie looks doubtful and Cass feels a pang in her rib cage.
"Yes. I don't know, but you're really cute, and I like your eyes, and so what if neither of us have been with girls before? You said next time, and I totally want my next time!" Cass' eyes widen. "See I told you I could get more awkward."
Sammie laughs and Cass laughs, and yeah, they're really awkward, but Cass means it. She thinks Sammie is really nice and super cute, so why not?
"Well, okay. I mean if you're sure."
"I am."
"Okay," Sammie grins. "How about I call you or something?"
"Yeah," Cass nods. "Call me or something."
"Okay. Bye Cass."
"Bye, talk to you later!" Cass waves and runs into her building and up the stairs. Ohmygodwhat.
She unlocks her door and walks in, only to be met with an angry Margot. "Where the fuck have you been?"
"Oh." Cass recoils slightly. "Sorry, I met someone…"
"And you didn't tell me you were leaving? And didn't answer your phone? Matthew and I were worried sick, Cass. What the fuck!"
"Sorry, mom," Cass rolls her eyes, but she feels kind of guilty. "My phone died."
"If you're going to leave a party without me and then not come home, you better tell me next time, you fuckin' bitch."
"Alright alright, sorry."
She hops up on her bed, shaking her head and thinking about how she has a date with a girl.
Ohmygod what is she going to tell her tìa?