It had been the longest month Regina had ever experienced. Every day dragged into the next, and she found herself begging the sun to set whenever she had to endure yet another council meeting for the umpteenth time. After the first few weeks in her castle, everyone had begun to find their own routine, helping Regina fall into a constant state of numbness as the days passed. She had grown to loathe a routine life during the 10 uninterrupted years she had spent with Henry, as she had become used to having something new to do every day with her little prince. Now, as she wallowed in self-pity, a hollow shell of the person she used to be, she couldn't help hating her days again. Hating the time she had to sit and think about Henry, and the time she was forced to spend thinking about how to defeat her wicked sister.
Last night had at least mixed things up a bit as she had her turn watching the grounds, which mostly involved walking in circles outside the perimeter of her protection spell all night. Those who shared her shift with her followed her: a couple of the dwarves, the thief, and Snow, who insisted on accompanying her through every shift she was given. They always gave her space, letting her walk a few feet in front of them as night turned into day.
She supposed in the end she had been grateful for their presence after one of those winged beasts leapt out of a bush and startled her, raking its claws across her torso before she could clear her thoughts enough to use her magic on it. She had cried out in agony as her skin was sliced open, and the woosh of powerful wings knocked her to the ground. Unable to catch herself, she landed on her arm and felt a pop in her shoulder, causing her to howl in pain again. She rolled onto her back to look up at the monstrosity and barely noticed an arrow fly over her head and into the monkey's shoulder. It, too, cried out in pain and quickly turned to fly away, clutching the arrow still lodged in its body.
The rest of the night had been spent arguing with the small party of people around her, Doc telling her she had dislocated her shoulder and insisting on putting it back in place, Regina insisting that her magic would work just fine, Snow trying to get her to at least return to the castle, and the thief having the audacity to grab her arm and rotate it while Regina was rebutting. Pain shot out of her shoulder to her fingers and her head as she screamed in the thief's ear. Of course, he had simply smirked and replied with, "a simple thank you would suffice."
She woke in the late morning, groggy and sore. The curtains were still closed, leaving her bedchambers dark and cool. She dragged herself out of her soft nest of pillows and blankets, wincing as she moved her arm. Though she had used her magic to close the wounds across her ribs, beneath her skin would still take time to fully heal, and her shoulder still ached from that bastard fixing her arm.
She had been exhausted when she returned to her room and had barely enough sense to remove her clothes before collapsing in her bed, let alone to clean herself. Her body was caked with blood and dirt, and her hair was still half pinned up, filled with grass and twigs.
Wanting to clean herself but detesting the idea of leaving her room, she waved her hand and in a puff of purple smoke she created a full bath tub with plenty of bubbles in the middle of her room. She lowered herself into the steaming water and hissed as the heat washed over her freshly healed skin. Regina worked at detangling her hair, and once it was smoothed out she breathed a sigh and leaned back, resting her head on the back of the tub to let the water cover her up to her neck.
It must have been only a few short moments of peace before she heard a quick rasp at the door, making her yell out in frustration as the door opened.
"Regina I wanted to- Whoa!" Snow stopped herself, visibly uncomfortable by the scene in front of her.
"What?!" Regina barked, turning her head to look at Snow. Horror was clear on the woman's face as she averted her eyes, trying to find anything else to look at.
"I'm sorry I shouldn't have barged in I just wanted to see if you were alright," she spat out quickly, "I'll just- you seem busy I'll come back later."
"Oh for God's sakes, Snow, you can't see any more of me than you usually can, what do you want?"
Snow slowly moved her gaze to Regina's eyes, clearly fighting the urge to look away from her stepmother's hidden yet naked body as Regina lifted herself into a sitting position. The water sat just above her breasts now, and bubbles clung to her wet chest and shoulders.
"I was hoping you'd be getting ready for the ball tonight, not bathing in your bedroom," Snow said, exasperated.
Ugh. The ball. Snow had been insisting for the past month to hold a party, and she gave Regina suspicions that it was for her birthday. After flat out refusing multiple times, and having to issue a few threats, Snow finally settled on a Valentine's Day Ball, which was almost as bad as a birthday ball. However, Regina couldn't stop a Valentine's party from happening, it had nothing to do with her after all.
"How many times must I tell you I'm not going to your stupid ball," Regina rolled her eyes and played with the water in her tub, "Besides, Valentine's Day doesn't exist in this realm."
"Well I think everyone could use a little love after the last month here," Snow quipped, "even you."
"Oh please," Regina muttered, "no one will even notice my absence." Her heart ached thinking of the holiday, and her mind raced with images of cut out hearts and pink frosting on Henry's nose. He had been her first and only Valentine after he learned about it in school. He was 6, and he had run to her office with a home made card, plastered with glitter and the words "I love you" written at least 20 times. From that day forward they had always spent Valentine's Day baking heart shaped sweets, curling up on the couch, and watching love themed movies until Henry crashed from his sugar high and fell asleep in her arms.
Snow sensed Regina's unhappiness, and unconsciously moved closer, but stopped herself before she saw more of Regina than she cared to. "You know Henry would want you to go."
"Henry doesn't even know me," she replied flatly, lowering herself into the tub again.
"Regina, I really think-"
Another burst through the door interrupted Snow, and Regina threw her hands up in exasperation, "Doesn't anyone respect privacy in this damn castle?!"
"My apologies, m'lady," came a deep voice from the doorway. "I was told Snow White was with you and-" Regina heard his breath hitch, and he coughed slightly while Snow quietly laughed to herself.
Oh no. Not him.
She turned her body to face them, slightly raising herself so the water splashed around her. Robin made no attempt to hide his wide wandering eyes, which were apparently glued to Regina's naked skin.
She felt her stomach flutter, was she nervous? She certainly wasn't self-conscious of her body; she flaunted it in every outfit she owned. But for some reason, as his eyes raked her bare face and wet hair that clung to her shoulders she felt a desire to hold her arm across her breasts, and to shrink back into the cooling water. She fought her cowardly urges, he's just a thief, and he's probably only seen bar wenches naked.
Finally Snow cleared her throat, and Robin subtly shook his body, looking over at the princess. Regina could read the embarrassment clear on his face at being caught gawking at the naked queen. His ears flared red as he spoke.
"I'm sorry to barge in like this, but I've been told that you were needed downstairs to help with organizing the decorations for tonight. It seems no one knows what to set up for a…. Val… something or other ball."
"Valentine's," Snow chuckled, as Robin pointedly stared at her, "Right, I'll follow you back down. And you," Snow turned to Regina, who was now draped against the side of her tub, sheer amusement plastered on her face, "Get dressed. I'll see you downstairs in an hour." She smiled coyly at Regina and turned to lead Robin, who hadn't moved since he said his piece, out of the room.
Really, what else did Regina have to do all day? Sit alone and dwell on her loneliness without Henry? She might as well sit alone at a ball. Everyone would leave her be, and it's not like she could dance anyway.
"Fine!" Regina yelled after them, "But I won't be happy about it!"
"You're never happy about anything!"
:::::
All she could see was pink.
The entire ballroom was filled with pink strings of paper hearts, pink tablecloths, pink roses; even some of the guests were wearing pink.
Regina rolled her eyes as she picked at the plate of food that Snow had shoved into her hands. She focused on the heart shaped cookie covered in pink frosting that sat at the corner of the plate, and her stomach tightened. What was Henry doing today? Was he baking with Emma? Or did he have a real Valentine this year? He was certainly old enough, and Regina grimaced at the realization that she would never watch Henry fall in love.
Her whole body sagged, and she picked herself up from her seat to go and watch the dancing going on across the room. Music played loudly throughout the ballroom, some traditional to the Enchanted Forest and some from Storybrooke, thanks to Regina.
She stood alone on the side of the dance floor and unconsciously swayed to the music. She had always liked the music from their other land, and "Queen" had always been her favourite. Somebody To Love echoed across the room, and Regina forgot to show her disinterest as she watched Snow and Charming spinning together, clinging to one another as they laughed and sang.
Her eyes wandered the crowd and landed on Robin, who was also spinning around the dance floor, his son laughing in his arms. A smile crept across her face as she watched him sway with the boy, and only looked away when they stopped dancing. She noticed Robin place Roland on the floor, kiss his cheek, and make his way to the tables of food, letting Roland run in a different direction.
She continued to watch the dancers, so lost in thought she almost didn't notice the tugging at the bottom of her dress. She looked down to see big dark eyes under a mess of curls, and warmth spread through her as she saw the smiling face beside her.
"My majesty," Roland said quietly, "will you dance with me?"
"Oh sweetheart," she looked around desperately as she tried to answer, "I'm afraid I don't know how to dance."
"That's okay!" Roland exclaimed, "I can teach you!" He grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the crowd of dancers, tugging on her sore arm and making her wince. They made their way to the center of the room, a hint of black in the sea of pink and white.
Roland took her hands and swung them back and forth, each movement making Regina pinch her eyes together in pain. Finally she couldn't take it, and simply picked up Roland, making him giggle, and landed him on her good hip. She swayed and spun the way she had seen Robin do, and Roland laughed, burying his face in her shoulder.
She looked over Roland's head and noticed Snow and Charming off the dance floor watching her, both smiling to themselves at the scene before them. She barely noticed Robin making his way to the Charmings as she spun Roland again.
Roland sat up quickly, tugging on her bad arm again as he hooked his hands around her neck, and looked her in the eyes. "Who's your Valentime, my majesty?"
"Valentine, dear, " she corrected softly, "And I'm afraid I don't have one."
"But," Roland looked down, examining the beads on her corset, "Papa says everyone has a Valen…tine. Someone who loves them."
Her throat tightened and tears stung the backs of her eyes. "I lost my Valentine, but it's okay. I'm sure he's happy today," she confessed, fighting the urge to cry onto the small boy's shoulder.
"I'll find you a Valentine!" Roland declared as he abruptly pushed himself out of her arms and slid to the floor, drawing a gasp from Regina as pain radiated through her torso.
She followed him slowly as he ran to the Charmings and Robin, who wore a disapproving scowl. "Roland! You have to be gentle with the queen, she was injured yesterday and you hurt her."
Roland's face fell as he turned to Regina, horror present in his eyes, "Did I hurt you, my majesty?"
Regina held back her grimace as she kneeled in front of him, "No dear, you didn't." His lip stuck out and his eyes brimmed with tears at the idea of hurting Regina, and she rubbed his arm to console him. "I'm just a little sore, but I'm okay."
She stood as she watched Roland nod solemnly and turn to his father, "Papa! The queen doesn't have a Valentine!"
Heat flared across her cheeks as Robin looked over at her, eyebrows raised. "Well we can't have that, can we?" He asked Roland, who was beaming up at his papa.
Regina looked to Snow for assistance, only to find a smirk from her and Charming. She pleaded with her eyes, only getting a simple, "everyone needs a Valentine, Regina" from Snow.
Regina rolled her eyes in response, and turned to Robin to declare that no, she didn't need a Valentine, when she felt lips crash onto hers, her surprise nearly knocking her over. She grabbed onto the arms in front of her and felt heat rise to her finger tips instinctively. Robin pushed himself away from her, tearing his lips from hers, and howled at the pain in his arm. She stood frozen, shock and something else paralyzing her. She barely heard Snow's condescending "Regina!" behind her.
"It's not like I meant to! What the hell do you think you're doing?!"
"Well, to be fair," Robin looked up at Regina while clutching his arm, red lipstick smeared on his mouth, "I was aiming for your cheek. I don't think that earns me a scolding, literally."
He grimaced as he rolled up his sleeve to examine the damage, though it wasn't the bright red handprint across his forearm that grabbed Regina's attention. Right at the base of his wrist was a dark patch of ink, a lion tattoo.
She could swear she felt her heart stop and the world freeze around her. No. It can't be. Suddenly she felt very young again, a lonely girl standing outside of a tavern, watching a green light glow over the man with the lion tattoo, yet too afraid of love to enter.
She started gasping for air, and everyone around her stared at her. All she could see was Robin, his light blue eyes that were locked onto hers, and the dark tattoo standing out on his wrist. She couldn't read the emotions playing across his face. Pain? Anger? Fear? She waved her hand in front of her, quickly healing his burns, before she quite literally ran out of the room.
She sprinted down the corridors, barely aware of where she was running. Sounds of people talking and singing grew distant behind her, and she could hear Snow yelling after her. She lifted the front of her dress to help her move faster, her arm and ribs ached with every step but she kept moving. She had to get away. It didn't matter where she went. Words echoed in her head with each painful step.
You're running away from him again?