Authors note: sorry for the long note last time. This chapter is a bit sad, but it provides some back story on Kakashi. Thank you to captain unstoppable(I hope that I spelled that right) for the review. Hope you enjoy.

I don't own Naruto

Kakashi didn't go straight home after the meeting with the Hokage, he just didn't want to go back to his crappy apartment. He wandered around the village hoping to meet up without someone he knows. "It's not like me to act like this, I'm perfectly fine without a lot of people in my life." Kakashi told himself. But to no avail, he knew perfectly well that he was miserable on his own. He was just to afraid to put his heart on the line to be broken again from his loved ones dying, especially if he got intimately involved with someone. As he was walking he met up with Anko.

"Hey Kakashi, what's troubling you?" she asked. "hmm, oh nothing, why do you ask?" Kakashi said, fooling no one. "Your not reading your perv book, that's how I know that there's something wrong, we've been friends for a long time Kakashi, I can read you like you read Icha Icha paradise." If Kakashi felt awkward before, that was nothing compared to now. "I don't want to talk about it, and I'll buy us some dumplings if you don't press the matter." Kakashi said, cutting Anko off as she was about to say something. "Alright then, lets go get some dumplings." Anko replied grinning.

Though he didn't want to get attached to anyone, he couldn't help having feelings for Anko, and he hated himself for that. "Why the hell am I doing this shit?" Kakashi thought to himself. "I thought I was done having love, but Anko is just, too attractive, nice, and kind. And if I'm going to love someone, it should be someone like Anko, she's a perfectly capable konoichi who has saved my ass on a few occasions." "You okay Kakashi?" Anko said, cutting off Kakashi's train of thought. "Oh, yes I'm fine, I was just thinking that's all." said Kakashi, going slightly red under his mask. "Okay then, but if you need to talk just tell me, I know we're shinobi, but we're still friends, and we've been through a lot together, don't be afraid to talk." Anko said comfortingly. "I'm just tired, I didn't get any sleep last night, I need to go home and get some rest." He said as he put down some money on the table to cover the dumplings, he left his plate forgotten, until Anko took it.

With that Kakashi started to go to his apartment. On the way he saw Naruto walking to Ichi Raku ramen shop, holding hands with Hinata. "So naïve." Kakashi thought. But in reality, he was just jealous of Naruto's ability to love someone without worrying about their wellbeing. But he couldn't bring himself to hate his former student, after all the things they have done when he was still his sensei. "Kakashi sensei! How are you, we haven't seen each other in weeks!" "Hi Naruto, I'm fine, what about you?" Kakashi said putting a smile on. Luckily for him Naruto had the emotional sensitivity of a kunai knife.

He walked down the street with Naruto pretending to listen to him. "Why is it so simple for other people to love someone, am I weak because I can't love people without fearing for their life. I don't understand how people don't worry about the ones they love dying. They have never been through what I have that's why. They have never seen the person they were planning to marry decapitated in front of them. They don't understand, NO ONE DOES!" Kakashi thought. They had reached the Ichi Raku ramen shop so Kakashi proceeded to his crappy apartment.

When he entered his apartment he went straight to his bed and laid down. He was very restless when he was trying to sleep. Thoughts of Anko drifted across his mind. When he finally fell asleep a dream of the death of his fiancé haunted him…

He was being held be his arms and legs by about twenty shinobi all of which had swords on them, they had removed his Anbu Black Ops mask and crushed it, along with his fiancé's. "We'll start with the bitch spat the lead of the Group." "okay boss, hmm let's see, this will do!" said a thug with a maniacal grin across his face as he handed the leader an axe used for chopping down large trees. Kakashi tried with all his might to break free of the men holding him, but he couldn't do it, he twisted back and forth, but his efforts remained fruitless and the axe swung down and beheaded his beloved fiancé. "YOU BASTARD I'LL KILL YOU!" Kakashi screamed at the leader. The thugs let go of him to let their boss kill him, but he was too quick, Kakashi drew his so and thrust it through his thoat. Then a squad of Anbu came and took him and his fiancé's corpse back to the village. That day Kakashi quit the Anbu Black Ops.

He was woken up by Anko who had come to his apartment to wake him up for the mission."Are you okay Kakashi, you were screaming you bastard I'll kill you when I came by your door. Do you need anything?" Kakashi looked into Anko's eyes and he realized that her eyes resembled his late fiancé very much, he couldn't bear to see her eyes at a time like this, so he promptly looked away. "No, but thanks for your concern Anko, what time is it anyways?" Kakashi replied. "It's about 6:45 AM, we should go to the gate and meat Kiba and Sakura there." "yeah, you're probably right."

So Anko and Kakashi set out to go to the gate when Anko said something that surprised Kakashi a lot. "Were you dreaming about your fiancé's death?" This surprised Kakashi because only 4 people including himself even knew that he was going to get married. Kakashi was the only one alive, and he had planned to take that secret to the grave. "How did you know about that?" "Asuma told me, before he died." The only people who knew Kakashi was going to be married were Kakashi, his fiancé, the third Hokage, and Asuma, Asuma was going to be the best man at the wedding. "As a matter of fact, I was dreaming about what happened, and the thought of it haunts me to this day, if I was stronger, she would still be alive. I hope it doesn't make you fell awkward when I say this, but you have the same eyes that she does, maybe that's why I could trust you when we first met so easily." Was Kakashi's reply.

Anko blushed, but not a lot, Asuma had said that they did look similar, especially their eyes. Then Kakashi spoke again, "Do you know why I quit the Anbu Black Ops?" "No, I never thought about that." "It's because Instead of bringing her body back when I came back, they destroyed right in front of me." Kakashi paused before saying, "She didn't even get a funeral." The rest of the walk was silent for them. Anko's thoughts were the only thing Anko heard "Wow, he's been through a lot more than I thought, I never knew that that is why he quit the Anbu, maybe that's why he has never really shown emotion, or attachment to anyone, because he is afraid that they'll just die on him, that's how I would feel if I were in his position."

They made it to the village gate about 5 minutes early, so they decided to sit down while waiting for the others. Neither of them knew a lot about the mission. Not even the Hokage knew much about it. Neither of them were sure how much they could trust their employer. But they were duty bound to go, or else they would be made missing ninja, and they would have the Anbu Black Ops on their trail, wherever they went.

Anko always had a certain degree of trust in the Anbu Black Ops, but after hearing Kakashi's tale, she couldn't put an ounce of trust in them. After a couple of minutes Kiba and Sakura arrived. "Alright team, its time to head out, we should arrive at the port for a boat to the land of snow in two days time, so let's head out." said Anko. So she set out with Kakashi next to her, and Kiba, Akamaru, and Sakura behind her.

The land of snow is a frigid place so all of them packed accordingly. Anko packed a thicker trench coat that she could zip up all the way. Kakashi, Kiba, and Sakura all packed their winter cloaks. The farther North they walked the colder it got. It had been a full day so they decided to set up camp in the woods by them. So they set up their tent the rolled out their sleeping mats and they decided to turn in early, so they would miss the cold of the night, and travel by the warmer day.

So they went to sleep for that night. Luckily for Kakashi he had a nice dreamless sleep. But Anko on the other hand didn't. But her dreams weren't terrible, in fact, they were good. She was wearing a very ornate white dress, it was her wedding day. She walked down the isle to see a handsome man with silver hair standing waiting for her, he had no mask on. He was very handsome without his mask on, she walked up the isle and stood next to him, when the command to kiss the bride came, they kissed with more intensity and passion than she had ever kissed someone before. Then her dream was cut off by Kakashi waking her up.

That's when she knew that she loved Kakashi more than she loved anyone before. She just hoped that he felt the same way, but just didn't show it. But she didn't make her move just yet, she would wait for the right time…

That's all for this chapter, I hope that you enjoyed, the next chapter will be a fun one, please review with your honest opinion. Thanks for reading.