Harley sat on the bed miserably it had already been 4 months since she had learned she was pregnant and the bump was beginning to show. It wasn't that big but she still felt "fat" since the Joker had always complimented her cute figure "Geez who knew pregnancy caused such problems" she groaned crossly prodding her bulging stomach.

What annoyed Harley more was that The Joker had BANNED her from any heists in order to prevent harm to the baby. She could still remember his words inside her head and every time she considered sneaking out it would replay almost like a broken record stuck in her mind.

Flashback

"But Puddin tell me WHY?!" Harley wailed miserably tears spilling down her cheeks.

"You heard me Harls take OFF your costume and hand it over NOW! I won't have you out on the town in this state you could lose the baby!" he said sternly.

"I'm no pushover Mistah-J I can take care of myself" she said trying to be brave but it was short lived.

The Joker frowned his eyes dark showing he MEANT business "Did you not HEAR what I said Harls when I said NO MORE CRIME I meant it...now hand over your costume AT ONCE!" He shrieked rage filling his voice.

Harley felt a wave of fear fill her body "O...Ok Puddin whatever you say" she said nervously her whole body shaking like a leaf as she removed her Harlequin costume and hat.

The Joker smiled satisfied at her obedience "Good girl Harls...NOW GO TAKE A SHOWER" he said sternly a hint of fierceness in his voice to show he wasn't playing games.

"Yes sir" Harley whimpered rushing off to the bathroom in her underwear her make-up being the only clown part she was showing.

After she left the Joker leaned back into his seat sighing heavily "Sorry Harls but I HAD to the child is TOO important to lose" he said rubbing the space between his eyes frustratedly.

Now

"What's a girl supposed to do without her fun?" she groaned then suddenly a familiar feeling came over her but she had no time to reach the bathroom so she opened a window and vomited harshly. Sweat ran down her back and temple; tears spilling over her cheeks as she heaved her shoulders to as she spewed her guts out.

Afterwards she wiped her mouth with a tissue her throat dry and sore she was SOOO sick of throwing up but it was part of the price of what came with being a parent so she just took it like a good little trooper to make her Puddin happy.

"Hey slugger how you doing?" a familiar voice said but with a slightly sympathetic tone than his usual teasing manner.

Harley whimpered weakly and lay on the bed she didn't have the strength right now to converse in conversation. She felt sick still and the throwing up had taken what little energy she had out of her.

"Aww poor Harls you feeling rough again?" he said sympathetically sitting down on the opposite side of the bed but frowned when he looked out of the window "Now Harls I told you if your gonna throw up use the toilet that crap outta your system aint gonna feed your babies" he said irritably.

"Sorry Puddin but it was too late to make it to the bathroom by the time I realized" Harley said weakly turning to face him.

The Joker pitied her since she had started showing pregnancy symptoms she had gotten terrible morning sickness and barely eaten a thing, slept half the time so whenever he was in the mood he locked himself in his study and had to make do with his secret stash of playboy catalogues that he kept for when Harley would leave him to cool her head; crave crazy shit that was usually expensive but it kept her happy and that did often annoy him but she kept quiet so hell he wouldn't complain.

There were a few bonus points to being pregnant her average sized 30D busts had grown to a 32DD cup making him pleased since he often stole secret glances or would accidentally on purpose grab them to cop a feel but it was worth getting slapped. She also seemed to glow; her looks had improved and even he couldn't deny she had developed some sex appeal since she had gotten pregnant.

"Well I guess it all depends on the sex of the baby I should take her to the hospital and get her checked out...this means a break in to the lovely Gotham hospital tomorrow that'll cheer the little minx up she has been feeling cooped up as of late" he thought to himself grinning his usual smile.

That night

The Joker lay under the sheet leaning against his pillow reading another of his murder romance novels. He despised the Romance part at times but loved how one of the lovers would kill the other due to being in love with someone else it excited him.

He was wearing his purple boxer with yellow flowers and a black silk dressing gown he had stole from a posh shop on one of their past heists. Something about it had just yelled REGAL to him.

"Whatcha reading Puddin?" Harley said sleepily as she turned to face him.

"Oh just another of my murder romance novels...Y'know Harls they really tend to make a lot of sense in our relationship without the murder" he said putting down his book for a minute.

"I see...Well I'm just glad you found a hobby that doesn't just include murder and weapons" she said smiling sweetly. She looked happy enough but The Joker could tell something was bothering her.

The Joker put away his book and turned to face her sternly "Harls what's the matter you've been acting weird since your belly started to swell" she said firmly.

"Nothing's up Puddin" Harley answered quickly her voice nervous.

"HARLEY" The Joker said crossly displeased that she was keeping secrets from him yet again.

"Well..." Harley started nervously.

"C'mon tell daddy what's the matter" he said stroking her soft blonde hair.

"It's just...I...I'm scared you'll replace me" Harley sniffed tearfully.

The Joker stared at her in awe "Harley?!" he said stunned at her answer. How could he not WANT her even when she was pregnant. Well sure she had gained some weight but her new beauty was somewhat better than before.

She was wearing a pair of black silk underwear with a bow on the front and lined with lace around the edges. The Bra itself was also black silk with a bow in the middle of the arch with black lace on the cups. on top she was wearing a silk knee length dressing gown was a dusty pink colour. The cuff hems were light rose pink as were the edges around the collar and a bow tie around the waist that fastened around the side.

"I know I'm a pain but I just love ya so much Puddin and I act all clingy coz I'm scared that sick of me and the only reason you keep me around is coz I'm good for nothing but appeasing your sexual needs..." she sniffed tearfully.

Every word Harley spoke seemed to tear The Joker up inside is this REALLY what Harley thought about when they weren't trying to kill Batman. Why had she never TOLD him but more importantly WHY had he never listened to her?

"I was already aware of the fact that when I first met you as Harley Quinzelle a foolish, shy and innocent Psychiatrist and that you just wanted to manipulate me but what I never spoke was that I thought you may think me beautiful" she sniffed.

The Joker pulled Harley into his arms softly so she rested her head upon his chest and nuzzled close to him with her legs tucked up upon his own. He stroked her hair in a consoling manner in order to prevent her from crying further since she looked cuter when smiling.

She placed her hands on his chest listening to his heartbeat "Puddin?" she said unsure of how he would react next.

"Harley...Pumpkin pie...I could NEVER EVER get sick of you...Your far too CUTE I love practically everything about you...except your vice grip hugs" The Joker cooed softly.

Harley wiped her eyes "Like what?" she sniffed her eyes still red from crying.

The Joker rubbed his chin thoughtfully "Let's see where to begin..." he said with a serious look.

Harley gazed at him intently desperate to know what he thought of her in truth rather than what he said to her on daily basis when he was busy working or having meetings with his men.

"I love your lovely blonde hair and how it tumbles down like a golden waterfall" he started playing with it fondly.

"R...Really I always thought you said it was like dry straw" she said nervously.

"Well it is when you always straighten it to death but when you apply your mousse and take care of it; it shines like pure gold" The Joker confessed feeling kind of embarrassed that he was actually saying this out loud.

"What about my eyes?" Harley teased raising an eyebrow now cheered up that he had told her he liked her hair.

The Joker smiled "Your eyes are like the bluest of oceans" The Joker cooed smelling her soft blonde locks.

"Really you mean it Puddin" Harley said happily her eyes welling with happy tears.

"I never lie about beautiful things Harls you should know that by now" The Joker scolded but smiled afterwards.

Harley smirked deviously "And these?" She said taking one his hands so they cupped her left breast.

The Joker smirked enjoying where this was going "Your breasts are PERFECT Harls and I've seen several broads in Arkham but none compare to you...well maybe the weed but I'm not into redheads sadly" The Joker teased tickling her under the chin.

"Oh Puddin you're the best" Harley cried grabbing his face and holding it close to her chest.

Despite this being an awkward moment in some ways The Joker was enjoying the feeling of her soft mounds. They truly were perfect in size and SOOO soft perfect to hold and squeeze and best of all they were HIS.

"Oh yeah Harls tomorrow we have to go to the hospital..." he started calmly.

"NO PUDDIN I DON'T WANNA GET RID OF IT!" Harley begged her eyes wide and filled with fear.

The Joker flicked her on the forehead crossly "Idiot we're not going to abort it we're going to check out the sex but for fun we'll have a gamble sound good?" The Joker smirked.

Harley liked where this was going and sat up "Ok Mistah-J what do you have in mind?" Harley giggled her eyes shining with mischief.

"If the baby is a BOY I get to pierce another mark on you with THIS" The Joker said pulling out his switchblade from behind his back.

Harley wasn't buying it knew he'd want something else it was just in his nature "And?..." she said suspiciously folding her arms with an eyebrow raised.

The Joker chuckled "You know me so well pooh..." he said rubbing the space between his eyes then looked at her his black eyes shining "And...you have to give me the best blowjob of my life" he sneered licking his lips.

Harley smiled "Knew it" she giggled "Can do Mistah-J but now for my half of the deal" she said deviously.

The Joker placed his fingertips together and gazed at Harley deviously "Name your price Pumpkin" he teased using her pet name.

"If...and only IF it's a girl you have to STOP pulling heists and take care of ME and the baby!" Harley smirked.

The Joker went quiet "Are you SERIOUS Harls?!" he said unable to believe what she was asking of him.

"Mm hmm" Harley nodded enjoying this "And you have to help train her alongside myself and be a DUTIFUL parent and NOT run off or I'll kick your ass!" she said darkly. The Joker nodded obediently to which Harley smiled and kissed his cheek "Good boy it makes it easier when you agree".

The Joker smirked "Smart thinking Harls but the sex of a child is like the flip of a coin you never know what you could get" The Joker chuckled flashing his white teeth.

They wrapped pinkies as a sign of their promise and since it was their affectionate way of doing things. The pair rolled over and went to sleep but both had their own thoughts that kept whirring around inside their heads.

Joker's POV (frustrated tone)

"It had better be a BOY if I lose to Harley I'll never live it down and I SO want to have fun with her she looks so cute when we're alone in my office and she's making me feel good".

Harley POV (desperate tone)

"Dear god I know I don't ask for much when it comes to a family life but for my sake let it be a girl JUST THIS ONCE since Mistah-J always gets what he wants anyway"