I have decided to continue this until I get bored. I am going stir crazy for the mid season premier and I am channeling it into my stories. I want to thank everyone who has left me a kind word of support. Hopefully, this gives you all a fix too! Hurry up February 27!
I Want You With Me
Chapter 2
Jackson
Jackson was nervous. It had taken almost two weeks for April to call him. He had been miserable every minute of each day.
Thoughts like 'What if April was changing her mind about him?' and 'What if she had been in touch with Matthew and changed her mind about marrying him?' haunted Jackson now. Jackson honestly didn't know which of those scenarios were worse.
But then she had called and said she wanted to meet for coffee. She had told him she would meet him at the cafe by the hospital where he had run into April, Matthew and her sisters the day before her shower.
He had arrived early and ordered both of their drinks, knowing April's after years of coffee cart runs. Now he nervously played with his straw wrapper as he waited, his leg bouncing up and down anxiously.
He glanced at his watch and noted that April had agreed to meet him ten minutes from now, but knowing her like he did, he wouldn't be surprised if she showed up early too. April was a stickler for punctuality. He wanted to say he was too, but the real reason he was early was because of her. He needed to see her after such a long time.
Jackson sighed, trying to calm himself down. It was just April.
Just April, Jackson thought with a small smile.
These past two weeks had been the most trying of his life. He had returned to work, enduring stares, glares, and gossip. He had put up with a lot of heckling and teasing from his close friends the most. Stephanie was the worst to see though. She literally radiated her anger and heartbreak.
The day of April's wedding, Jackson had known Stephanie had gotten pretty close to telling him she loved him outside of their patient's room. And when he had turned to her at April's wedding, it was love and hope in her eyes that he saw before he apologized. Jackson knew in that moment that he was apologizing for a lot more than breaking up with her. He was breaking her heart, because she was in love with him and she had expected him to say it to her. To say he loved her. Instead he had hurt and betrayed Stephanie by standing up and finally being honest with everyone about who he really was and who he really loved.
Jackson had endured it all the past two weeks, but he couldn't say he didn't deserve it. He realized how much he relied on April and her constant friendship over the years. There would be moments he would go seek her out to talk to her about stuff, but then he reminded himself that she wasn't there. She had taken the time off for her honeymoon to think about stuff and "get her head together". He had taken her for granted in so many ways, but as his dearest friend he never would again.
April was the most loyal, kind, and trustworthy person in his life. Even after he had dumped her outside the ER the night of the pregnancy results, he still sought her for her opinions, to hear her laugh about ridiculous stories he needed to tell, and when he needed her for comfort. Even when he had hurt her, she had put it aside and was always there for him.
From now on, Jackson would dedicate the same loyalty and dependability that she had bestowed on their friendship. Now matter what happened between them, he would do this
'Just April' seemed to be an oxymoron to Jackson now. She wasn't just anything. She was wonderful and perfect. He had been an idiot for so long.
Jackson looked to his watch. Five minutes. He looked down at the table and noticed that he had shredded the straw wrapped and the receipt for the coffees. Jackson stood and swept the shredded papers into his palm and discarded them in a nearby bin. He really needed to calm down.
He looked out the window and there she was, walking down the street. She was in a beautiful sun dress and flats. Her hair was in its curly waves, blowing behind her as she walked towards the cafe. Jackson felt his heart beat faster with each step she took towards him. She walked in the door and glanced around before settling her gaze on him.
He smiled and waved, pointing to the cup of coffee he got her.
She smiled and walked over and sat in front of him as she settled herself, "Thanks for the coffee. And for meeting me."
He smiled and said, "Of course. Chai Tea Latte, right?"
She nodded and smiled.
"How have you been?" he asked.
"Okay," she said, sipping her drink, "How about you? I have been thinking about you a lot. Wondering how...everything at the hospital is going after...you know."
"Terrible," Jackson admitted, chuckling at April's alarmed face.
"Really? Why?" she asked, her eyes wide and worried.
"April? Seriously, I stopped your wedding, and then you disappear. I am the only target for the gossip," he said, chuckling.
April gave him a sympathetic smile so he said, "It doesn't matter though. I am just happy to see you. I have missed you."
April smiled and looked down at her hands, giving Jackson an uneasy feeling.
"Well I am coming back in a couple of days," she said, biting her lip, "But...I wanted to talk to you about…everything," as she gestured between them. He nodded and was grateful she was getting right to it.
Jackson nodded and inhaled, holding his breath.
"I just...well, I have a question," she said, biting her lip nervously.
Jackson nodded and April looked at him in concern. He realized his face was probably beet red from holding in his breath. He exhaled and said, "Anything, ask anything."
"When you said you wanted me with you...does that mean you want me and everything that I want?" she asked, looking up at him.
He furrowed his eyebrow in confusion and she seemed to understand his confusion.
"Jackson, I want to be with you too, but...well, I want to be serious. I want to eventually get married and have a family. I always have and...I can't change that about myself. I won't change that about myself, not even for you. So if you aren't serious about wanting that, then I don't see the point of this," she ranted out, gesturing between them.
Jackson was shocked and coughed out anxiously.
"Uhh….uhhmm," Jackson spluttered out, trying to find something to say to her. She was bringing up marriage? Jackson didn't even know how he felt about that. He knew he loved her, but...wasn't this fast? She had been at the wedding alter with another man not even two weeks ago.
He looked up and saw that April was interpreting his stuttering and silence as him being unsure. She had thought about this a lot, and Jackson hadn't. Which was typical. April usually over thought everything, while Jackson didn't think things through enough.
Jackson reached out in an effort to stop the thoughts racing through his head. He grabbed April's hand and interlaced their fingers. She looked to him uneasily, like she didn't think he was ready.
He was though. Jackson was more than ready for April. For this. He had been when he first brought up marriage to her so long ago, and he was now. He just wanted it to be...right.
He squeezed her hand and she focused on him, her eyes wondering and worried as they fixed on his.
Jackson leaned forward and whispered, "April, I want you and I want everything that you want."
April looked at him for a moment in disbelief. She studied his face and he held his breath as he waited for her response. This was it. Were they going to do it? He thought his heart would beat out of his chest in fear.
The small upturning of April's lips reminded Jackson he needed to breath and he exhaled out in relief and happiness as he smiled back at her. He stood and leaned across the table and brushed his lips against hers softly, not able to help himself.
He pulled away nervously, hoping that was okay, but she only smiled and blushed as he sat back down. April glanced around, nervously looking to see if anyone else had noticed their brief PDA, but Jackson could care less. He took her hand and squeezed it in his own, then pulled it to his lips and kissed her knuckles softly. He needed to touch her.
April smiled at him and whispered, "People are staring."
"Who cares?" he asked. April smiled and glanced towards the street window and her face immediately paled and went from blushing and happy to horrified in seconds.
Jackson followed her gaze in alarm and he felt his own face fall as guilt rushed to the surface. Stephanie was there in the doorway, seething and tears threatening to spill from her eyes. Jackson's smile fell from his lips as he met her grief stricken eyes.
April
April felt guilt rush over her, even though she didn't have anything to feel guilty about technically. But April felt...empathetic to the poor girl. April knew what it felt like to watch the guy you love with someone else, and April knew what it was like to lose Jackson. April was uniquely qualified to know how Stephanie felt.
But April didn't know what it was like to have your boyfriend betray and humiliate you in front of everyone you work with. That was something April could only sympathize with. Stephanie had definitely been collateral damage in the ups and downs of April and Jackson's relationship.
April looked to Jackson, who looked so guilty and shamefaced it hurt April. Stephanie turned and stormed out of the coffee shop.
"You should…" April said, pointing to the door. He nodded and stood, walking out the door and jogging to catch up with Stephanie who was now beyond April's sight on the street.
April looked around the cafe and everyone...everyone was staring between her and the door, wondering what the hell was going on. This morning they all got a show with their morning coffee and croissant.
April sipped her coffee and pretended that she was checking something on her phone, but really she played a game of Candy Crush as she waited for Jackson to come back. It was sooner than she expected, because she had not even got through the one round when he walked back into the restaurant.
April smiled at him sympathetically, not asking if it was okay, because she knew it wasn't.
She reached across the table and said, "I...don't know what to say in this situation. Sorry?"
Jackson shrugged and looked down at their hands. He closed his eyes and inhaled as he took a sip of his iced coffee. April looked around the coffee shop and once more, every eye was on their little table.
"Want to go for a walk?" she asked.
He nodded and they stood, leaving the cafe quickly before anything else could happen.
Jackson and April held hands as they walked slowly towards the hospital. Jackson was going in still to do some paperwork.
"I wonder when it will get normal...us being together. When it won't hurt someone," April wondered as they approached the entrance.
Jackson looked at her and said, "I don't know. I just know I never want to hurt you again. I love you."
April smiled and her heart flip flopped at those three words. He said them so easily now. She had never thought Jackson would say it to her and now he said it as if he was saying the sky was blue.
"I love you," she whispered as she leaned forward and pecked his cheek. April squeezed his hand gently before letting go and waving goodbye. He smiled before turning and walking into the hospital.
April turned and walked towards where she had parked her car with a small smile on her face. She had some other errands she needed to run before she went back to her apartment, including a run to the post office to return the wedding gifts, which she had been dreading. But she had dealt with everything else and she could do this last thing.
April had even tracked down Matthew and apologized to him and to give him back his ring. He had been harsh and unforgiving, but April had expected that and even deserved it. Hopefully one day he would forgive her.
Her sisters had actually stayed in Seattle while the rest of the guests and even her parents departed Seattle. They wanted to help her get everything back in order. Though they never officially apologized, April had been touched with how gentle and tender they had been the past week. It was a kindness she hadn't expected, but she needed. No apology was needed as they stood by her, not pushing April at all, even though they were all dying for details about Jackson.
One night she had gotten drunk with them and talked all about him. How they had been friends and then lovers….how it always came back to him. Her sisters had all awed and said how romantic and in love April was, wondering how she was going to handle everything with him. April had the best night that night. It was the first time she felt the sister connection she heard about so many times.
Arizona had also been around more than usual to make sure April was okay.
After spending an exorbitant amount of money on shipping and postage, April walked out of the post office with a weight off her chest. She walked towards her car and climbed in. Even though she had her wedding ruined and she had hurt Matthew, she felt...happy. She had Jackson...it was new and exciting, but she could see them together finally. Really together now. And she was happy and bubbling with excitement.
Part of her felt guilty for feeling so good about that, but she couldn't stop. Every time she thought about Jackson today, telling her he loved her and wanted her and wanted everything she wanted, her heart expanded as if it would burst out of her chest.
April rolled the window down as she buckled up, just as her phone beeped.
A text message from Jackson. April smiled and opened it. Dinner tonight?
April smiled and quickly typed back, Yes, should I meet you?
April waited in front of the post office until her phone beeped with Jackson's answer, No, I will pick you up at 7 ;)
April texted back, See you then before pitching her phone into her purse and driving out of the lot. She wondered what she was going to wear, or where Jackson would take her. She thought back to where he had taken some of the other girls he had dated over the years and the only one that stuck out was Lexie. He had taken her to a basketball game.
She had no idea what he had done with Stephanie.
April tapped her steering wheel as she drove home and she chewed her lip as she went through all her options. Would it just be dinner? Or would he plan something for afterward? This would be their first date. They had never dated. They had just had a...whatever they had. Fling?
Would he expect them to have sex tonight? April suddenly wondered, anxiety rising up in her.
April knew they had slept together before, but that was something she wasn't ready to jump into again right away. April felt her stomach flutter as a million questions flooded her brain. This was something she never had to deal with when it came to Jackson.
April made it back to her apartment, but by the time she had shut her door she was in full meltdown mode.
She picked up the phone and called Arizona, not knowing who else to call for help.
Arizona picked up on the second ring and April rushed out her predicament. Arizona said she would swing by the apartment by five so she could help her get ready. April smiled into the phone and exhaled in relief, thanking Arizona over and over.
April leaned against her front door and smiled as she closed her eyes. It was just Jackson, she reminded herself. And they were going on a date. It was the first step for them and she was nervous, but also excited.
April's eyes popped open as a million thoughts came back to her. She bounced off the door as she began thinking it all through, so she could be prepared for every scenario.
Sooo? Thoughts?