Warnings: Gaara. References to Gaara's traumatic childhood, some non-explicit violence, minor character deaths.
Suna is hot. And dry. And also hot.
Did he mention that it was hot?
Kakashi can't wait to get out of here.
He's working undercover, selling some kind of hot pastry at a stand arranged by T&I, and he's not making much of a profit, because who would want to eat hot food in the desert?
Unlike what you might expect from T&I, there are no sharp objects or suspicious implements. Just pastries. It's a routine information-gathering assignment, notable only because they have a treaty with Suna and aren't supposed to be spying on each other.
As if Suna isn't doing the exact same thing.
Kakashi has his hair dyed bright blue, because any shinobi worth anything would notice it was dyed, and it would only look more suspicious if it was a bland, boring brown.
And he can't exactly wander around Sunagakure looking like himself.
He wears the standard desert gear, which covers the lower half of his face, not without a certain sense of irony.
It's an easy job, usually reserved for trainees in the interrogation department who are being considered for much riskier undercover roles. But he's perfectly qualified, and there may have been a slight element of favoritism, so here he is.
He does everything he's supposed to, chatting with other vendors, with low-level shinobi who don't know any better, people on the street. He dutifully takes notes in a special T&I code and conceals them in the pastries he ships out (that has to be Inoichi's idea, he's always been a strange one).
That still leaves plenty of time for his real mission: Gaara-watching.
It's been four years since he first started to subtly try and find a way to get to Suna. Naruto is deliriously happy, ditto Sasuke, and Neji is serenely content or whatever the Hyuuga equivalent is. Kakashi decided it would be less stalkerish to introduce the boys to Sakura once they were all at the Academy together, but as far as he can tell she is also growing up happy and well-adjusted.
Gaara, the son of the Kazekage, is slightly more of a challenge.
But Kakashi's here now, and the boy can't be more than five or six, so he can't be too miserable yet.
Hopefully.
Kakashi at six was perfectly miserable, but what are the chances that an imperfectly-sealed Jinchuuriki carrying the entire future of his village on his shoulders would have a difficult early childhood?
He should have tried harder to get here sooner.
Even the most delicate of hints about Gaara get him strange or frightened looks, so he has to abandon the straightforward path fairly quickly. Which is fine, it's not really his style, anyway.
He's constructing a model of the Kazekage Tower out of pastry dough when Gaara just happens along the road in front of his stand.
He has the same blood-red hair that Kakashi remembers, but it's the way the crowd parts, pressing themselves against the buildings and whimpering, that really clues him in.
These are the sorts of subtle clues you pick up on as an elite jounin.
Gaara's eyes are two dark hollows in his head, and Kakashi thinks he remembers future-Gaara saying something about how the Shukaku prevented him from sleeping.
The guy next to him, who sells an iced drink and does much better than Kakashi does, ducks behind his cart and motions for Kakashi to do the same.
"It's the demon," he mouths, trying to squeeze his bulk into the gap between the wheel and the precious icebox.
This is not a promising start.
Kakashi can't risk drawing attention to himself, so he starts hanging around his stand at weird hours, getting a reputation as a bit of an eccentric. That kind of attention is fine. He's supposed to be a pastry chef, who are eccentric by definition. Maybe Gaara will just happen by again when the street is less crowded.
He's also working on a backup plan that involves breaking into the Kazekage Tower, but he's hoping not to have to resort to that. It's a special kind of paranoia that forces your village leader to live and work in the same place.
But he's lucky, or maybe Gaara is just really bored, because he sees him again three days later.
It's ridiculously hot, even for Suna, and even the iced drink guy has packed up and gone looking for shadier pastures. It's just Kakashi and a few kids, who are running around playing some sort of ball game.
How can they be running?
They've set a net up at the base of one of the lower walls, and the object seems to be to kick the ball as hard as they can into the net.
As Kakashi could have predicted, this ends with the ball being stuck on the roof.
The kids complain for a bit, which is illogical. Kakashi has never played ball in his life, and he still knew exactly what was going to happen.
Except, then there's a very localized sandstorm, and the ball dislodges itself and starts floating to the ground.
The kids, and Kakashi, turn slowly.
And there is Gaara, little face pinched in concentration as he brings the ball right into his arms.
He looks very different without the kanji on his forehead, and with chubby baby cheeks.
He manages a surprisingly sweet smile, and holds the ball out to the kids. "Here you go. Can I play?"
They turn and run.
Gaara's smile turns down, and his eyes narrow hatefully. The air is suddenly thick with malevolence.
The ball goes flying at the kids' backs, along with some very business-like coils of sand.
"Whoa, hey!" Kakashi says.
He starts to step in the middle, remembers what a terrible idea that would be, and pushes his cart into the sand instead.
Now, he's seen Gaara form aerial pathways with his sand with enough swiftness and accuracy to match the pace of two different people at the same time. He knows how delicate and precise he can be.
But right now he just wants to lash out at something.
The cart explodes, and Kakashi has to duck civilian-slow, so he gets sliced up by the debris. Nothing serious, according to his quick self-assessment, but he's not happy about how close that one piece got to his eye.
And this could be difficult to explain to Inoichi.
He's aware of a presence, and forces himself to shake his head as if to clear it, to touch the largest gash, the one on his right arm, and whimper. Then he lets himself look around, and visibly startles when there's a Suna jounin not three feet away from him.
Part of the medical corp, if he's not mistaken.
"Are you alright?" the man asks.
How do civilians react to injury? "I'm bleeding," Kakashi says, trying to sound panicky.
"Don't worry, I'm a medic," the man says.
Called it.
Gaara seems to have calmed down a bit, and has taken notice of the remains of Kakashi's cart, crushing them further.
"Do you live around here?" the man asks.
"Not really," Kakashi says. "I was just turning the dough. The sunlight gives it flavor."
The man looks at him like he's a nutcase, but not like he suspects that he's an enemy infiltrator.
"I didn't know I shouldn't be out here," Kakashi says, trying to show the proper deference towards a shinobi. The few civilians he encounters personally usually run away. Belatedly, he whimpers again.
"It's fine," the man says, giving Gaara a sideways look. It's not… it's not angry, or hateful, more exasperated.
If Kakashi were really a civilian caught in the crossfire, he might be offended. Of course, then he wouldn't have gotten involved. As is, he's grateful that at least one person in Gaara's life didn't treat him like shit.
"I can take you back to my office and patch you up," the man offers. "It's closer than the hospital, anyway. If you want."
Also, then this incident might go unreported.
"I heard you shinobi can work magic," Kakashi says.
The man laughs. "Just about."
The laughter finally seems to break Gaara out of whatever daze he was in, and he wanders over.
The Suna ninja looks tense, but doesn't stop him.
"You're hurt," Gaara says. "You're bleeding."
"My cart kind of… disintegrated," Kakashi says.
"You'll be compensated for that," the man says quickly.
"I'm sorry," Gaara says, all big eyes and sad mouth.
"It's not so bad," Kakashi says, even though he probably should have stayed mad for longer.
Gaara takes his hand, and licks at the cut there.
Kakashi doesn't have to fake his surprise at that. That's kind of weird.
He considers introducing Gaara to Anko, then realizes what a terrible idea that is.
The Suna ninja pulls Gaara back. "Uh, how would you like me to show you how to wrap that?"
"Okay!" Gaara says, licking the blood off the corner of his mouth.
Well. Huh.
"I'm a senior jounin with the medical corp," the man says, a little defensively, though of himself or Gaara, it's impossible to tell. "My name's Yashamaru."
Kakashi composes his face into what he hopes is an appropriate mix of fear and awe. "It's an honor to meet you, Jounin Yashamaru. I can just go to the hospital, it's no trouble."
"Don't worry, I'll have you fixed up in no time."
"I'll help!" Gaara says.
"Okay," Kakashi says. "If you insist."
He spins them his cover story, not that Yashamaru particularly cares. Like most medics, he's not overly concerned with social graces.
Gaara is spectacularly unhelpful in the most adorable way possible. He spills a bottle of disinfectant, somehow gets himself tangled up in the bandages and shreds them with his sand trying to get out, and is finally mostly-occupied with putting sunscreen in Kakashi's scratches.
It stings, but he can live with it.
Yashamaru seems to visibly relax the longer Kakashi doesn't freak out about Gaara.
"You must be new here," he says eventually.
"Just got in a few weeks ago," Kakashi says easily. "I thought there might be a market for sweets here, but it's too damn hot. Pardon my language. I might have to move on."
"We'll see that you have the best of materials," Yashamaru promises.
Maybe he won't end up having to explain the missing cart to Inoichi after all.
It's a good thing Kakashi wants to get to know Gaara, because after that he sees him every day.
His future as a pastry chef is not looking too promising, because while he does get a new cart, and they actually don't skimp on the materials too outrageously, his few customers have decided they don't really care about pastries that much.
"What's this?"
"That's the dough. You probably shouldn't eat that. Or go ahead, it's fine."
"What's this?"
"That's the oven, don't put your hand in there, it's… well, okay, I guess that's also fine."
"What's this?"
…and so on.
"This is my bear," Gaara says. "He's called Bear."
"Good," Kakashi says, like a man whose pets came with their own names.
"He can wave." Gaara manipulates his sand so the bear waves at each of them. "But he doesn't say hello."
"Okay," Kakashi says. "Sorry."
"Say hello to me."
"But the bear—"
"No, you."
"Oh. …hello."
Gaara smiles. "Hi!"
This would be extremely cute, if it weren't also extremely sad.
Kakashi may have to call his actual mission here a wash. After a few days of everyone giving his stall a wide berth, and disrupting the normal marketplace traffic, Kakashi finds himself invited to a 'much more upscale venue'.
He suspects that the building across the street is a front for Suna's equivalent of ANBU.
His business does actually pick up, but he doubts Inoichi particularly cares how many pastries he sells.
He spends a lot of the time that he used to spend trying to socialize composing his mission report in his head. 'I don't know what the general populace thinks, but the ANBU have a sweet tooth. I couldn't tell you the general sentiment towards Konoha, but the Kazekage's son seems to like us well enough.'
He is gathering useful information, just not the sort he's actually here for.
Yashamaru also starts hanging around a lot. Kakashi suspects that he is Gaara's minder, in which case it would make sense that he's a medical specialist.
It's a little frustrating because he thinks he could actually like Yashamaru, and they could have a lot of interesting conversations about medical ninjutsu, but of course he can't talk about that.
Eventually, Kakashi hopes that Konoha and Suna will have a more amicable relationship, preferably without the end of the world. He doesn't remember seeing Yashamaru before, but he might have missed him, or perhaps he was killed during Orochimaru's invasion of Konoha.
So mostly he stands around and makes sure Gaara doesn't accidentally kill anyone, and tries to divert him from purposefully killing anyone, and Kakashi pretends not to notice.
He is subtly checked out by what he suspects are the ANBU, and not at all subtly checked out by the Kazekage personally, but his cover story holds. He almost blows it when the Kazekage is a complete ass to his son, mocking his enthusiasm and glaring until his smile melts into something appropriately sober, but Kakashi restrains himself.
He's also visited by Chiyo-baa-sama herself, and burns his hand and generally looks like a complete buffoon in his panic. But he isn't recognized, so it all turns out fine.
He only hears about the incident with the drunk because he's been picking up Suna ANBU hand-signals in his spare time.
Gaara was wandering around late at night, as a sleepless, unsupervised child is prone to do, and was menaced by a drunken idiot. Who was very shortly thereafter a dead drunken idiot.
Kakashi doesn't really see the loss here; what if it had been some other kid, one who isn't virtually invulnerable? But no one asks his opinion, and the Kazekage is livid.
Kakashi has a bad feeling about this.
He's sitting in his tiny, one-room apartment, trying to decide if it's too soon to make a move, and if not, what it would be, when Yashamaru drops through his window.
Kakashi tries to get in a defensive position and tries to act like a surprised civilian and ends up tripping over his own feet. Which, embarrassing, but hopefully convincing.
"I'm not an idiot," Yashamaru says.
But perhaps not.
"You're good at this, very good, but I know another medic when I see one. What are you doing hanging around Gaara?"
Kakashi very much does not want to have to kill this man, the one person he's seen be at all civil to Gaara, but he can't let Konoha be implicated.
Yashamaru lowers a very business-like kunai.
"I've known other Jinchuuriki," Kakashi says.
The kunai stops moving, but Yashamaru doesn't relax. "Go on."
"Generally, their villages treat them like shit. I've never understood that. Even if they really were the mindless destructive machines they're believed to be, why treat them badly? When they want to hurt someone, there you are, and they already hate you. But I've known them personally, and I know Jinchuuriki are just people, people with a terrible burden to bear. One they shouldn't have to bear alone."
Yashamaru studies his face. "I believe you."
Kakashi's breath all comes out in a rush.
"The Kazekage thinks Gaara is out of control."
Shit.
"He has ordered me to kill him."
Double shit.
"He believes that, if Gaara survives, and he can maintain control in the face of such a betrayal, he will have proven himself worthy of being the Sand's Ultimate Weapon."
"What the fuck?" Kakashi asks.
Yashamaru nods. "Exactly. The man is insane. He killed my sister to get his weapon, and now he plans to toss Gaara aside like he isn't his son, like he isn't a human being at all. None of this is Gaara's fault."
"I agree," Kakashi says, "but why are you telling me all of this?"
"Your home, your village, wherever you come from. You said there are Jinchuuriki there?"
"Yes."
"And their lives are better?"
"Yes."
Yashamaru takes a deep breath. "I don't know exactly what you were planning. You never would have succeeded in spiriting Gaara away, the Kazekage values him too much, in all the wrong ways. But I can't protect him any longer. The life that faces him if he survives, is no life at all. I will help you get him out."
Both Kakashi's eyebrows go up. "Really?"
"Yes. You must never tell him the truth, so he—"
"Wait, wait," Kakashi says. He has lived through all the Sasuke drama he ever cares to. "That's crap. Gaara's not an idiot, he knows his father hates him. He thinks you care about him. What good could it possibly do him to hate you trying to protect a man who doesn't deserve it?"
"Well. You think?"
"Yes," Kakashi says. Firmly.
"Well, I suppose that makes sense. Fine. I'm going to attack him tonight. I'll rig an explosion. His sand has grown so strong, I'm sure he'll be fine. I'll tell him to come straight here. You'll have to get him out. Can you do that?"
"Sure, no problem," Kakashi says.
Yashamaru sighs. "This is a terrible idea. I don't even know you. You could be anyone."
"I at least claim to care about Gaara as a human being," Kakashi says.
"That I actually find that comforting is a sign of how truly desperate I am. Know this: I will be watching you from the afterlife, and if you're just fucking around, you'd better hope you live a good, long life, because my sister will kick your ass."
"Understood," Kakashi says.
"Can you at least tell me your name? No, wait, better not. If, by some curse of fate, I survive this mess, I'd rather not be able to give you away."
"Is there no way for you to escape?" Kakashi asks.
"None. The Kazekage knows how I loved my sister, he would never believe it a mere coincidence that Gaara and I disappear on the same day. No, he has to find at least one body. The Shukaku is so odd, they'll excuse the lack of another as just one of its mysteries."
"I'll respect your choice," Kakashi says, very reluctantly. "I'll get Gaara to safety, and see that he has friends, and a happy life."
"That's all I want for him," Yashamaru says. "And maybe, someday, to know his brother and sister. Tell him that his mother's love goes with him, and mine."
"I will," Kakashi promises.
Yashamaru pauses halfway out the window. "Are you sure he would rather know I died protecting him, then think that I betrayed him and my death is of no consequence?"
"Yes," Kakashi says. "Trust me on this; I'm an expert."
Yashamaru gives him kind of a weird look, but he leaves.
Kakashi just stands there for a moment, taking measured breaths, then he springs into action. He throws together an emergency pack, with anything that could be used as medical supplies, all the food and water he has on hand, and ink and pen.
He casts a complicated genjutsu, and stashes the cart in an abandoned building where it hopefully won't be found quickly. He casts another, even more complicated genjutsu, to convince two of the maybe-ANBU that he left three days ago. It's the best he can do on such short notice. Hopefully Inoichi will be able to use this cover again, if he wants to, or at least Suna won't suspect foul play.
Then he waits.
The moon is high in the sky when he sees the explosion on the roof of the Kazekage Tower, and then it's time to wait some more.
He's just starting to get worried when he senses someone land on the roof of his building, and he's out the window and up top almost as fast as sensei could.
There's Gaara, and he's crying, tears and snot all over his face, and the kanji stands out lividly, obviously a fresh scar.
It's just about the most pathetic thing Kakashi has ever seen.
"Oh, Gaara," he says, dropping to his knees and reaching to touch his shoulder, ignoring the way the sand abrades his skin.
"Why?" Gaara asks, crying like his little heart is broken. "Why did he do it?"
"I'll tell you," Kakashi says. "I promise. But first we must get out of here."
All Gaara has is his bear, blood-spattered and leaking stuffing everywhere, and the clothes he's wearing.
"Everything's going to be alright, now," Kakashi says.
Gaara just continues to cry.
They get out of Suna without anyone noticing or the Shukaku manifesting, though there are a few anxious moments. Kakashi is growing increasingly concerned by Gaara's apathetic compliance. He's essentially been kidnapped by a stranger, and even though Kakashi does genuinely mean him well, it's unhealthy for Gaara to just go along with it.
Gaara's obviously had a hard life already, even if it hasn't been terribly long.
"I think we should stop here for the day," Kakashi says at length, when he finds a cave that can offer them shelter from the sun. He forces himself not to panic when he steps under the rock outcropping.
Anyway, it's really more of a hollow.
It gets a faint smile on his face, and he ushers Gaara inside and puts a pastry in one hand and a water bottle in the other.
"We'll move out again when it gets dark," Kakashi says. "Are you able to sense if anyone is approaching?"
Gaara shrugs.
"I'll set some traps," Kakashi says, and goes to do that.
When he comes back, Gaara is still sitting in the same place, holding his food and staring at the wall.
"I have answers and a gift for you, Gaara," Kakashi says. "Which would you like first?"
There's no response.
"Answers, then," Kakashi says. He takes a deep breath. "The Kazekage ordered the attack on you. He thinks you're nothing more than a weapon. He's wrong."
Gaara turns his head to look at him.
"Yashamaru loves you, wanted to save you. He distracted the Kazekage so you could get away."
"He… he said that…" Gaara says. He doesn't look like he believes it.
But it's a start.
"You…" Gaara frowns. "Who are you?"
"I'm a Konoha ninja."
Gaara frowns harder.
"I'm from another village."
"Kazekage-sama-" Gaara pauses. Swallows. "You're an enemy."
"Sometimes Suna and Konoha are enemies," Kakashi says. "But right now we're at peace. And the two of us, Kakashi and Gaara, we aren't enemies. I'm here to take you back to my village. You'll have a better life there."
Gaara gives him a deeply skeptical look, one he should be too young for.
"There will be other kids to play with," Kakashi says. "Friends."
He can see that Gaara wants to believe it, but he just can't imagine it.
"You'll see," Kakashi says. He can be patient; Naruto will do all the work for him. All Kakashi has to do is offer Gaara a secure and supportive environment to grow up in—Gai and sensei should have that covered—and help him learn better control over his abilities.
Speaking of…
"You are a Jinchuuriki," Kakashi says.
Gaara just looks confused.
"You are the guardian of one of the bijuu."
Gaara is instantly wary. Maybe he thought Kakashi didn't know?
"That doesn't make you a bad person," Kakashi says. "It is a great responsibility, to protect the rest of the world from a bijuu. You shouldn't have had to do it all by yourself."
Gaara mumbles something that could involve 'Yashamaru'.
"Well, just you and one other person, then. In Konoha, there's another Jinchuuriki, a grown-up, and she'll be able to help you. So will I, and my friend Gai, and my sensei."
"I'm a monster," Gaara says.
"You're not. The demon you protect everyone from, that is not you. You are two totally separate entities. Or you should be. The Kazekage made you into a cage, a prison, and he did a very bad job. That is not your fault, it's his."
Gaara looks like all he got from that is that he is somehow defective.
Kakashi sighs. "Maybe it will make more sense after I show you. I told you I brought you a gift; I will help fix the cage so that Shukaku doesn't bother you so much."
He rolls up his sleeve, exposing the simple tattoo on his forearm. It's a seal, because it isn't safe to leave any of this research just lying around.
Gaara jumps at the puff of smoke, but relaxes again when all that happens is a bunch of paper appears.
Kakashi's obsession with seals had started as an effort to be closer to sensei, to help him develop his Hiraishin faster and maybe learn it himself, so he would be more useful in a fight. It didn't take long to see that one, sensei had it covered, and two, Kakashi was never going to be a match for sensei and he would have to content himself with the two- or three-person Hiraishin he already knew. Or an emergency Yin Seal patch-job.
Then he met Hizashi, and hit on the idea of finding a way to free the Hyuuga. He remembered how much of a burden the curse seal was for Neji. Then sensei caught him, freaked out, and sat him down for a series of extremely long lectures that basically boiled down to having to let people make their own mistakes, especially when they are the second most powerful clan in Konoha.
Kakashi still isn't satisfied with that argument, but he did concede, reluctantly, that he might have to be more subtle. His reverse Caged Bird Seal is ready and waiting for the Hyuuga clan to get its shit together.
He contented himself with medical seals for a long time, and then there was the first—and last, hopefully—time he was involved in delivering a baby, when he realized what a colossal idiot he was. How much trouble did Gaara's imperfect seal cause him? What a pity Kakashi didn't know any sealing experts who could help him!
Idiot.
This seal took him three and a half years to create, one of the reasons it took him so long to get here. But here it is, and here Gaara is, and they're both on their way back to Konoha.
Kakashi gently spreads the thin paper out on the ground, careful not to tear it. He does not want to have to re-draw all of this again.
"Go stand in the middle," he says.
Gaara finally starts to look suspicious. It's a good sign, for all it's currently rather inconvenient at the moment.
"It won't hurt," Kakashi says. "And after, you'll only hurt other people when you want to."
Gaara gives him wide eyes.
"I know there have been accidents, and I know that sometimes you need to protect yourself. This will give you more control."
Gaara clutches his bear a little closer.
"I won't force you. We can't go back to Konoha until you do this, because I don't want anyone to get killed by accident, but we can stay out here in the wilderness as long as you need. Well, not here exactly, we're still too close to Suna, but… in general."
Gaara considers this, and steps into the circle.
Kakashi suspects that the poor kid just assumes things can't get any worse.
Lucky for him, Kakashi is sincere. But this right here, this is exactly why he doesn't understand the prevalent attitude towards Jinchuuriki. The real question isn't how Akatsuki managed to capture so many Jinchuuriki, but why they even had to bother. Most probably would have just walked away from their villages.
Anyway, none of that matters now.
Kakashi presses his hands to the edge of the seal, activating it.
Gaara doesn't look too concerned by the light show; in this time, his sand shield has never been breached, the only strikes that can reach him are emotional ones.
When it finally ends, Gaara sways.
Kakashi rushes to his side. It shouldn't have hurt or damaged him in any way. "Are you alright?"
"I… I…" Gaara says. His eyes flutter shut, his head bows, and he slumps limply over Kakashi's arm.
A few seconds later, there's the sound of adorable, whuffling snores.
"Right." Kakashi says. "I probably should have thought of that."
He gives it 50-50 odds that Gaara will wake up furious and disoriented, but if he attacks, Kakashi will deal with it. He's not concerned about anything less than a full-blown Shukaku manifestation, and he has a few plans for that if it comes down to it.
For now, he'll watch over a little boy's first night's sleep.