Author's Note: So everyone seemed to like my little piece of insanity here, and a friend was bugging me about wanting to see this, so here you all go.

Back in Asgard...

"Loki Laufeyson. You kneel before me today, awaiting judgment on your recent actions."

The AllFather heard his own voice echo menacingly back from the walls of the empty room, and thought that his adopted son should look more intimidated. However, the young man seemed absorbed in opening…something.

"The charges against you are grave in nature. The first of which is betraying me and all of Asgard by taking the throne. The second of which is destroying Jodenhiem. The third of which is attempting to start a war with Midgard by-"

Odin broke off mid-sentence at the rustling of paper, and looked up.

Loki sat before him; not with his head hanging in shame, but intently unwrapping some kind of Midgardian food from plain paper, its outer covering – a bag – discarded off to the side carelessly.

"Are you not taking the situation seriously?" Odin asked him in a firm tone, watching the dark-haired young man take a bite so big that he could barely fit it in his mouth.

"Only in the most minimal sense." Loki mumbled around of a mouthful of Shawarma a few seconds of chewing later.

"This trial will decide your fate, Loki. I suggest that you at the very least pay attention…"

"Oh, I am." However, as if to disprove his own statement, he turned his attention to the food and took another enormous bite.

Ignoring him, Odin continued to list the charges.

"Third, attempted takeover and enslavement of Midgard. Fourth, and finally, trying to deliver the Tesseract into the hands of the Chitauri." He paused a moment to let his words sink in. Loki continued, in all appearances, to ignore him. "I don't think that you are understanding the gravity of your crimes, Loki. For a son of Odin to betray-"

"Technically I was never your son. You even disowned me at the start of this trial when you called me 'Loki Laufeyson' instead of 'Loki Odinson'."

"You were raised as a Prince of Asgard-…"

"A lie to keep me from discovering my true origin. Did you ever really intend to let me have the throne?"

He took another bite of the odd food. Odin shot him a withering glare, but it seemed to go unnoticed by the green-clad demi-god.

"You know…" Loki paused to swallow, directing the rest of his comment at Thor, "This Midgardian food isn't half bad…I can see why the obnoxious armored man wanted to go there for mid-noon meal…"

"Wait till you try coffee." The blonde grinned.

"Coffee?"

"THOR! LOKI!"

The two glanced sheepishly back at their father, who now had the bridge of his nose pinched between his index finger and thumb and was taking controlled breaths to keep his temper steady.

"If I could have your attention for the rest of the trial…?"

It was said more as a threat than a question, and both brothers instantly sobered. Loki waited until the AllFather started speaking again before he took another bite.

"Loki Laufeyson, the charges against you are most grave. How do you plead?"

A mumble, intelligible, and with a hand keeping lettuce from falling out of his mouth.

"Loki…!" the tone was a warning.

The demigod chewed desperately, swallowing most of the bite before replying, more discernibly this time.

"Innocent."

"WHAT? You have the GALL to claim that you are innocent of-" Loki began crumpling up the paper wrapping loudly, and Odin continued, shooting his dark-haired son a glare as the mischief god's brother watched with a barely hidden smile, "-that you are innocent of betrayal and attacking Midgard?"

"I did not betray you, the throne was mine by right in Thor's…" He left one of his signature 'long' awkward pauses as he turned slowly to look at his brother, then back at Odin "…..absence. You had started a war with the frost giants, and I merely took the burden of that war upon my shoulders, along with the duties of the AllFather. As for Midgard…well…that's another matter. Seeing as you are not the guardian of their realm, you do not have the right to convict me of anything done there. Thor is the closest representative available, as he is the self-proclaimed 'protector' of that place…" Loki glanced up at his brother through dark lashes, eyes wide and eyebrows drawn up slightly into his signature 'kicked puppy look'. "Brother, do you hate me enough to wish me locked away for eternity?"

"Of COURSE not Loki! Don't be ridiculous! I would never-!"

Before Thor had a chance to amend his statement, or even realize what he'd said, Loki turned back to the AllFather, his expression calm and confident.

"There you have it. Innocent. Now if someone would be so kind as to undo these cuffs…?"

"You can't have me arrested for 'mouthing off in court'!" Loki shouted as he was none-too-gently shoved into the prison cell and the door slammed behind him.

The AllFather's smirk appeared on the other side of the bars.

"Yes. Yes I can."

"Thor!" He shouted, pressing his face to the bars as Odin walked away, trying to get a glimpse of his brother. "You can't let them do this to me! Brother, help!"

The blonde demi-god's trigger 'keyword' seemed to have no effect.

"It's only for a millennium or so. I promise I'll bring Schwarma once a year."

Loki watched with a growing sense of dread as the prison door closed behind the AllFather and his adopted brother, and the guards turned to glare at him menacingly, just DARING him to try anything.

Well.

Damn.