-::-

(chapter two)

-::-

The four conquerors of Ba Sing Se were invited to a bonfire party. Some of them—usually held by teenagers—were rowdy and lewd, but this one sounded like it was a genuine celebration true to the roots of Fire Nation bonfire celebrations. The guest list did consist of many important people, albeit young ones.

Mai had to ask permission. She did not like her answer.

"I do not want you going anywhere with Zuko," ordered Fire Lord Ozai.

Mai should have expected it. It was obvious that Zuko was at least physically attracted to Mai, and the constant paranoia was a part of her life at this point. She was younger, he was possessive. The only thing was, he had never denied her something until now.

Her blank expression did not reveal any of her anger.

"Azula and Ty Lee will be there too," Mai said, internally cringing when she realized that she had not denied anything about Zuko. She should have, but it was too late now.

"That doesn't matter. You're staying here."

Mai wanted to argue, to protest, but she had never done that before in her year of marriage. Maybe she should have at some point, but her parents beat any desire to rebel against her circumstances out of her. She just stared for a few moments, waiting for Ozai to respond to her.

He did not and so she walked away, shutting herself in her bedroom.

It was a stupid day trip anyway. She would have been bored to tears, Azula and Ty Lee would have painful sexual tension, Zuko would keep looking at her.

Yes, it was best for her to stay home.

-::-

"I want you to stay with me tonight," said Ozai, the first comment since he forbade her from leaving the palace ever again. She thought that perhaps she was in too deep with this baby, and…

She would talk to him tonight. It might be the best option.

"In your room?" Mai asked, although it was rather obvious. She wanted to say something sarcastic and smooth, but she felt sick and miserable. There was no fathoming the depths of her hatred of her condition.

Mai did as she was told. That night she went to her own bedroom and undressed. She prepared herself for bed but applied a tad of make-up as a second thought. If she wanted to persuade him, she would have to be attractive. The dark circles under her eyes and the pallid hue of her lips certainly complemented her depressingly grey aura—Ty Lee's words, not hers—but they were not sexy features.

She walked through the huge, shadowy corridors of the palace and knocked on his door. He answered it and wordlessly stepped aside to let her in.

He looked at her like she was fragile, as he had since day one of their relationship.

Mai despised him until his gaze shifted elsewhere and the comfortable indifference returned.

-::-

On the other side of Caldera, the bonfire party had died down. Azula did not enjoy herself, despite being the guest of honor. Ty Lee kept hitting on three boys, as if Mai was not enough, and Zuko was clearly hiding something. Something that could destroy her credibility and prompt Ozai to punish her.

She talked her way out of trouble; Zuko was not supposed to come home alive or unchained.

Azula cornered him as soon as the partygoers began to trickle away from the embers of the once raging bonfire.

"You will tell me what you are hiding or there will be a gaping, burning hole where your chest cavity used to be," Azula demanded, her words heated and violent but her voice cold and peaceful.

Zuko truly did not like the fact that Azula had him pinned against a tree. He could knee her and run, but he was not certain if her threat was empty or not. Prince Zuko liked to keep his chest cavity intact and not charred or burning.

"Mai is pregnant. With a baby."

Azula stepped back. "A baby? As opposed to being pregnant with a lemur?"

Zuko did not like the word lemur. It reminded him of the Avatar and the pursuit he felt was not yet over. He pushed that to the back of his mind and walked away as quickly as possible.

Azula clenched her fists and tried not to burn down the forest.

She almost burned to death the person grabbing her from behind, but she smelled Ty Lee's strong perfume and kept her flames under control. Azula spun around and accepted the hug. Ty Lee squeezed her tightly and stepped back.

"Did you have fun? I had so much fun!" Ty Lee smiled, her eyes sparkling like precious gems. Azula hated looking at them because they were so pleasing. "It's so sad that Mai couldn't come."

"Just kiss her already," Azula snapped. Ty Lee suddenly was crestfallen, as if she was not in love with the wrong person. "I suppose, you could if you're into pregnant girls."

Ty Lee's jaw dropped. "Pr-pregnant girls? Mai is pregnant?"

"Apparently." Azula was surprised that she kept the strong vitriol out of her voice. "I imagine it is my sibling."

Ty Lee's eyes flitted about, as if words were hiding in the forest. Azula knew it. She knew Ty Lee was in love and it made her want to burn the forest down. Maybe she should do that. It would be very satisfying.

Azula reluctantly decided against it and located the servants who would bring her home.

-::-

It was late and Mai and Ozai were talking. Or, he was talking, and expecting her to be engaged in it, but she could only think about what she wanted to ask.

"You aren't listening, are you?" he asked, thankfully not in the tone he used with people he had mutilated or tortured.

"I'm just thinking. Maybe," Mai whispered, "it would be best if we didn't keep this baby."

He did not have an obvious reaction, which scared Mai more than anything. She saw betrayal in his eyes after a moment, which was both dreadful and a relief. Then his bitter expression faded; he hesitated. She knew that look; he remembered how young she was.

"Why do you not want it?" he asked, setting down his drink.

She averted her eyes. Mai did not know why she felt so ashamed, but she did.

"I don't know if I can handle it," she whispered. "I don't think… there's plenty of time. A lot of time. We have years."

He touched her hand. She instinctually began to pull away before he grabbed onto her and she remembered where she was and who she was with.

"I want it. Reuniting with Zuko makes me think it's a good thing," he said. Mai frowned faintly. "Your feelings for him aside, he's a disappointment. So much of one that I can't even joke about it."

"Azula is… remarkable." That was true. Mai did not mean to pause while speaking; she just hated remembering that her best friend turned into her daughter. "When I say time I also mean that we haven't been together for even a year yet and I think this is too fast. I don't even know anything about you and I'm supposed to have your baby?"

She kept her voice flat, but that could not repair her words.

He stood up. She felt small and helpless with him looming above her.

"We're keeping it," he said. This was as the Fire Lord, not as… whatever he was to Mai now. "But I think you're right. We do need to get to know each other. I'd be happy to do that."

Mai nodded. She had no other choice but to agree.

-::-

In the morning, Mai woke alone. She stood up, had dry heaves, and then crept to her own room to get dressed. The morning was unpleasant, to say the least. It became even worse when she walked out of her room and ran directly into Princess Azula.

Wonderful. Just what she needed.

"You could've told me you were pregnant," she snarled. This was probably going to end in Mai's death by lightning, and Mai wondered for a moment if that would be a better fate than having this baby. "Why not? I should've been the first person you told, not Zuko."

"I was genuinely afraid that you would kill me," Mai said.

Azula glowered. "I don't know if that is a joke or not, but I could understand your fears. How did you get pregnant?"

"I really don't think you want me to tell you."

"I mean—was it intentional?"

"Of course it wasn't intentional. We've been married for less than a year."

"Hmph." Azula left, sparing Mai.

Oh, joy.

-::-

Zuko sat down across from Mai at a worn Pai Sho table. They were disinterestedly playing. Mai toyed with one of the tiles between her fingers; Zuko was almost immobilized by the memories of his Uncle. Even the gorgeous girl in front of him could not make him forget what he did to Iroh.

"I remember when I got the announcement about your wedding," Zuko said, pushing a tile into place. It was a bad move, but Mai did not notice. "I was at some port somewhere. I remember the sights and smells but not the geography of it. Anyway, it was posted everywhere and Uncle got a letter. Sucks I missed your wedding, but I was pretty busy being banished."

Mai set down the tile that was between her fingers.

"I have no idea how Azula got you home like this, but I think you're lucky. I think you should be more careful what you say," Mai said.

"I'm just commenting on getting your wedding announcement. Nothing more."

"Then be careful of the way you look at me. He…" He not long ago had someone's eyes gouged out once over that and Zuko already had a horrid scar to deal with.

"Do you like being married to him?"

"You really didn't listen to what I said, did you?"

"I want to know."

"I don't care about whether I like being married to him or not. I don't really like anything, as you might have noticed, but I'm neutral on the marriage topic."

"Do you like being pregnant?"

"No one does." Mai focused on the game after that. Her eyes, although never meeting his again, said much more than her words.

Zuko, having some tact and enough smarts not to ask what she truly felt, also turned his attention to Pai Sho.

-::-

That night, Zuko tossed and turned. He stared at the ceiling and tried to silence his thoughts to no avail. All he could think about was how the Avatar might not be alive, how he did not know how to make Ozai stop looking at him like he should be imprisoned, how he let Iroh get imprisoned, how Mai was pregnant, how Katara touched his scar in those catacombs…

Zuko thought from time to time that he was a screw-up, but Iroh always reminded him of the reasons why he was not. Yet, with Iroh not around, Zuko was forced to live with the fact that he could not do anything right.

Or have a crush on a girl who he could feasibly date.

Mai was married to his father; Katara saw him as the face of the enemy.

They were both also kind of horrible people in his opinion.

But what better a match for someone as horrible as himself?

-::-

That night, Mai stayed awake as long as she could before she knew she was stretching the plausibility of it being for her own entertainment. She walked to the Fire Lord's room and knocked on the door. It took a few moments, but he answered it and she stepped inside.

He kissed her roughly and she took an involuntary step back. She wished she had not done that, but there was nothing she could say. The tension in the air was enough without commenting on the kiss.

Fire Lord Ozai shut the door behind them. Mai struggled to remember how to walk.

"I was just about to go find you," he said, his eyes fixated on her.

She was not used to that. Usually, he did not look at a person for long.

"Target practice was engrossing." Somehow this was more awkward than when they first got married. Mai did not know such a thing was possible. "I needed it."

He took her by the waist and guided her into the depths of the bedroom. She did not like being handled by people, but she was in no position to stop him. Ozai set her on the foot of the bed and she tried not to make eye contact. It might spark conversation.

Ozai set two fingers under her chin and tilted her face up; there was no avoiding meeting eyes now. Few things made Mai scared enough for her blood rush to her heart and legs, but this did. Thankfully, he did not speak to her as she feared he might. He kissed her again.

He pushed her onto her back, by her shoulder instead of her stomach, and she remained as still and tense as a statue.

His knuckles brushed up the inside of her leg towards her thigh.

-::-

In the morning, Zuko declined the offer to practice firebending with a real instructor. He knew it was what his father expects, but he would be mocked either way by the Fire Lord. Azula, of course, decided to light up the morning with blue light brighter than the sunrise itself. He could not ignore it from his bedroom; it made it impossible to go back to sleep after his nightmare about the Avatar.

When he got up, she had just finished her morning bending, and they literally collided with each other in the living quarters. After picking themselves up, they collected themselves and finally looked at each other. Zuko saw her waiting for him to speak and decided to ask the question that had kept him up late into the night.

"Azula," Zuko asks, grabbing her arm. She hits his hand and takes several steps backwards, glaring fiercely. "I didn't mean to… ugh. Azula, do you… do you think Mai is happy?"

"No. I think she is literally never happy and never has been for as long as I have known her."

"I phrased that wrong. Is she happy in her marriage?" Zuko asked, which just aggravated Azula further.

"So help me, do not ask about this again. Ask Ty Lee about this kind of thing," Azula snaps. As he turned, she added, "And if you don't want me to relay this conversation to father, ask her if she's in love with Mai."

It seemed petty, but Zuko knew he was just as bad.

There was no way on Earth he would ever be with her, so why was he considering it?

-::-

Mai saw a real healer about her pregnancy at Ozai's behest. He said that the ones in the Colonies were not good enough and she agreed. It was obvious by this point that the one she saw in the Earth Kingdom was right, but they could gain more information from one in the homeland.

The woman was professional but looked rather eccentric in her many layers of shimmering fabric and copious jewels. She looked like a very tacky fire.

"So, I am ten weeks pregnant and you've given me twenty herbs to take. We're done. Goodbye," Mai said, having no patience for conversation or being poked and prodded any longer.

"Are you unhappy about the pregnancy?"

"I am unhappy about everything," Mai said dryly.

The healer would not accept that answer. "You could bond with your baby."

"I'd rather not."

"If you change your mind, in the morning, you can set your hands on your stomach and visualize your hopes and dreams about being a parent."

"Yeah, I am never going to do that."

(an: thank you so much for the response to this story. It's awesome.)

(an2: I'm going to be updating the last week of every month as of my plans right now.)