Jeff was slumped on one end of the couch, his feet up on the coffee table, while Annie occupied the other side with her legs neatly tucked underneath her. They each had one hand resting on Lucy's back, who was lying between them on a pillow.

Jeff stared blankly at a commercial for dog food on the TV before checking his watch.

"It's about two minutes since you last looked," Annie said without turning her head.

"I swear time is going backwards," he complained. "And I kind of wish it would. That way I'd know not to even get out of bed today so I wouldn't be stuck babysitting Chucky."

"How would you know about the assignment if you hadn't lived through the day yet?"

"It'd be like Groundhog Day."

"Well you didn't really specify what..."

"Are we seriously debating this?"

Annie glared at him. "You can quit being so snappy with me any time you like. It's not as though I didn't have more important things to do either, Jeff."

"What? Color code all your class notes?" He flinched when she dug her nails into his hand. "Ow, what?"

"Why can't I have plans? Why do you automatically assume I study all the time?"

"Because you're Annie?" He propped his head up on his free arm. "I don't mean it in a bad way; it's just your thing."

"You're an idiot," Annie huffed, taking her hand away and standing up. "That's just your thing."

"Wait, where are you going?"

"To the bathroom, Jeff, is that OK with you?"

"You can't leave me here with the monster!"

"Well you're not coming with me so... suck it up!" She walked off down the hall just as Lucy began to whimper.

Jeff stared daggers at the baby. "I hate you and I hope you have fake colic."

Annie returned a few minutes later to her spot on the couch and pressed her hand on top of Jeff's until the noise died down. He didn't look up from his cell phone. Rolling her eyes she leant forward to pick up a magazine to leaf through but there were only two choices – the TV Guide or some furniture catalogue with ridiculously overpriced things circled. Someone was going to have to be the bigger man before the silent treatment was too far gone, and it wasn't going to be the actual man in the room.

"Jeff?"

"What?"

"Can we just at least pretend to get along because I don't think I can take a whole night of this, it's exhausting." She tried a more light-hearted tone. "Plus there's nothing good to watch on TV and I already arranged your hair products in the bathroom in height order."

Jeff gave her a sidelong glance before looking back at his phone. "Fine."

"So..." she ventured after a beat, "who are you texting? I always wonder how many contacts you have, you're on that thing 24/7."

"Britta. Pierce coerced her into staying at his place to help look after the kid. I think it's going well." Jeff showed Annie Britta's latest message.

You're half a lawyer. Justifiable homicide's still a thing right?

Annie cracked a smile. "What'd you tell her?"

"To use the OldWhiteManSays Twitter account as evidence and she'd be acquitted on the spot." His phone beeped and Annie leant across to read the latest message with him.

Old White Man just asked if my ovaries were exploding looking after LL – I want his face to explode.

"LL?" said Jeff.

"Laser Lotus."

"Of course it is. I'm glad these kids aren't real; they'd get beaten up at school for sure. Laser Lotus, Kickpuncher, Lucy Cupcake Mermaid Puppy-Paws..." He grinned as Annie took a swipe at his chest. "I'll bet Shirley's named hers JC."

"I think I heard her say it was Gary."

"Why does that sound familiar?" A gurgling noise broke his train of thought and he looked down at the baby.

Annie's cheeks turned pink. "That was my stomach. I didn't have time for dinner before I came over with Lucy the way she was and all. Have you got anything here?"

"Um, five-day-old Chinese leftovers, some protein shakes and something that I think used to be broccoli." He raised an eyebrow when Annie's stomach grumbled even louder. "We can ring for a pizza?"

"Yes please."

Jeff hung up his mobile. "They said it'd be thirty minutes. I can't believe you talked me into getting pineapple on half. Fruit does not belong on a pizza."

"I can't believe you're getting anchovies on the other half. They're like eating shrivelled up bits of shoe." Annie rummaged around her backpack she'd brought over. "Speaking of food, we should really feed Lucy." She found the empty baby bottle and lined up the teat with the sensor in the doll's mouth.

"Do you think if we put actual liquid in there we could short-circuit her?"

"We are not zapping our baby!"

"But then there'd be no chance of anymore crying and we could eat our dinner in peace!"

Annie stretched her legs out and gazed up at him through her eyelashes. "So you wouldn't kick me out to go on your date?"

The corner of Jeff's mouth quirked up. "Well someone has to eat the pineapple."

She smiled at him. "I wish the pizza was here now. I'm seriously contemplating the broccoli." She twisted the bottle around in her hand. "Can we play a game to take my mind off my stomach lining eating away at itself?"

"What kind of game?"

Annie burst into a fresh wave of laughter. "You are kidding me? You would seriously kiss Starburns, marry Duncan, kill Leonard and sleep with the Human Being?"

"It could get kinky, not gonna lie," said Jeff. "Maybe spandex does it for me."

"Disturbing," she said, wiping tears from her eyes. "OK, do another one for me."

"Easy, same group."

"Oh God... OK, I would kiss Leonard."

"Ew."

"Not like a French kiss, sicko, like you would peck your grandfather on the cheek or something. Then I would marry Starburns."

"Again, ew."

"And get it annulled right away," she continued. "I'd sleep with Duncan – and I'm going to pre-empt your 'ew' right now and let you know I mean 'sleep next to and not touch'. And I'd kill the Human Being because that thing should not be let out in public."

"Well, you've got to love the fact that you put so much thought into it – even though you completely changed the rules around." Jeff shifted on the couch so he was facing more towards her. "OK, lay another one on me."

Annie got a daring look on her face. "Slater, Britta, Shirley and me – go."

"No way, that's a landmine just waiting to go off."

"Come on, don't be such a chicken. We're both adults here, we can handle it."

"Alright, fine, and don't start clucking at me," he said, pointing at her as she went to make a chicken wing under her arm. "Hypothetically I'd kiss Shirley, kill Slater, fu... sorry, sleep with Britta and marry you."

Annie didn't know whether to feel happy or confused. "I always thought marriage was the boring one in this game?"

"I don't know, I hear that newlyweds have very active sex lives," he smirked. "Hypothetically of course."

She could feel her face and neck burn, but she made herself not shy away. "Of course."

"Your turn now – Me, Troy, Abed and Pierce. Go."

"Right, well, kill Pierce obviously. Um, kiss Troy so I could go back in time and high-five high school Annie, marry Abed and... sleep with you." She gazed at Jeff, unable to help the slight detour she took at his lips before meeting his eyes.

"I'm sorry, marry Abed?"

Annie shrugged. "You're not really the marrying type... one night might just be nice." She couldn't help the little thrill that ran through her when she realised she managed to startle him. "Hypothetically of course."

"Yeah," he said, his voice thick.

They sat in silence, not turning away from one another. Jeff unconsciously started to brush his thumb up and down Annie's hand that was on the doll. Emboldened, Annie felt herself slowly inching forward when there was suddenly a rap on the door. They shrank back into their corners of the couch, the moment broken.

"Must be the delivery guy," Jeff said a little too brightly.

Annie briskly nodded. "Great. Y'know, because I'm starving and stuff."

"Mmm-hmm. Um, so if you hold the doll, I'll keep my hand on her and have one hand free to get the food." They stood up walked over to the front of the apartment, bumping arms along the way. Jeff opened the door and greeted the delivery guy, who gave the baby a once-over. "Don't ask," said Jeff.

The delivery guy shook his head. "Wouldn't dream of it, dude." He took the money from Jeff and handed over the cardboard box. "Last house I was at the guy had one of those pillows that looked like a chick. This job's better than people watching at Walmart."

"OK, see ya!" Jeff kicked the door closed, hearing Annie stifle a giggle. "Yeah, you just laugh it up there, Chuckles. You know I can never order pizza again, right?"

"At least you didn't have a pretend baby and a girl pillow."

"Just shut up and eat your fruit pizza."

By the time midnight rolled around Jeff and Annie had sat through half a Police Academy movie, two reality shows and a documentary about llamas while they chatted on and off about school and tag-team texted Britta to keep her from attacking Pierce with his own leg casts. They'd also warded off two crying fits from Lucy when they had to move their arms to keep them from falling asleep.

Jeff could see that along with Annie's arm, all of her was pretty much starting to doze off so he gently nudged her shoulder to wake her up. "Come on, we better go to bed."

Annie crinkled her forehead. "Aren't we just sleeping on here?"

"Why would I sleep on here when I have a perfectly good King size bed with sheets made out of Egyptian cotton waiting for me?"

"But how are we going to keep Lucy quiet when we're in different rooms?"

"That's why I said 'we' better go to bed." Annie's eyes widened and Jeff sighed. "I'm sure we can share a bed without things getting weird. What was your little catchphrase before? 'We're both adults here'."

Wanting to stick by her earlier statement, Annie squared her shoulders back and nodded. "You're right, we'll be fine. I just might need something to use for pjs... I didn't think this would be an overnight stay."

Jeff stood and held out his hand to help Annie up. "My pink frilly nightgown's in the wash but I'm sure I've got some sweats and a t-shirt somewhere."

Jeff was already laying in bed, cringing at the squeals Lucy was making ("Seals going through a blender," he thought), when Annie finally emerged from the bathroom. She'd rolled his grey track pants up so she wouldn't trip, but there wasn't much she could do with his 'All 5 Dances' XL Greendale t-shirt, which swamped her small frame.

Annie tried not to gawk at his bare chest as she slipped under the covers and found Jeff's hand so the baby would stop crying. "Interesting shirt," she said, trying to sound nonchalant despite the fact she was climbing into bed with a half-naked guy.

"I suffered through those five dances, I deserve something," he joked. "Looks better on you."

She smiled and nestled her head into the pillow trying to get comfortable. Jeff switched off the bedside lamp and turned onto his side so they were facing one another with Lucy nestled in the middle. The moonlight shone through Jeff's flimsy blinds so they could still make out each other's faces.

"So what's the furniture catalogue for?" said Annie. "Buying a throne to go with your King Size bed?"

"I thought you were sleepy?"

"Not now that I've moved."

"I'm not buying anything."

"But you circled a whole heap of stuff."

"Wishful thinking," he said, shifting his free arm so it was tucked under his head. "Living the college life doesn't exactly allow me to Scrooge McDuck my way through a money vault."

Annie moved her feet around, enjoying the smooth feel of the sheets on her skin. "Do you miss your old life?"

"Yeah," he admitted.

"Oh."

"Not to say this new life doesn't have its perks. Overpriced chicken fingers, endless diorama making... and I guess there's a pretty good study group that I only sometimes want to strangle." He noticed a smile ghost her lips. "So what were those plans you were talking about before?"

"Hmm?"

"You know, the 'not color coding my notes' plans?"

"Oh, those. It was nothing."

Jeff lifted his eyebrow. "Your voice is doing that high pitched thing when you're trying to cover something up. Come on, do I need to compel you again?"

Annie squirmed. "I was just going to go shopping for a new outfit."

"Don't you already have sweaters in every color of the rainbow?"

"It's not for school."

"Is it for a date?" he teased, realising from her continued squirming that he was right. "Oh my God, it is for a date! Well who's the lucky guy?"

"Jeff can we not?"

"Is it Bieber hair in Anthropology? Or that guy with the limp who always winks at you in the cafeteria?"

"Just cut it out."

He laughed. "Why? Is it too shameful to say? Ooh, is it Garrett? No, wait - Leonard? I didn't really buy that whole 'he's like a grandfather' thing before you know."

"It's Rich, OK!" Annie clamped her mouth shut, immediately regretting her outburst.

The laughter faded from Jeff's voice. "TV's own Richie Rich?"

"Jeff..."

"Bon Jovi's Richie Sambora?"

She tucked some hair behind her ear. "You know which Rich, Jeff," she mumbled.

"I know, but if I say it out loud then my brain might bleed." He sighed and turned onto his back. "You really know how to pick them don't you."

Annie sat up a bit. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well first it was the hippie and now it's the serial killer."

"What the heck are you on about?"

"Have you seen that suppressed rage thing he's got going on? He's one step away from dressing up in old lady clothes and stabbing people in showers."

"Rich is a nice guy, Jeff," said Annie with a huff, turning away so she was on her back as well.

"I'll bet that's what all his victims say before they're chopped into tiny pieces."

"You're a jerk you know that? And guess what, you forgot one person before – it went Vaughn, a douchebag ex-lawyer and then Rich." She shut her eyes. "I'm going to sleep."

"Whatever." Jeff stared down at their hands on the doll, noticing that Annie had pulled hers away as far as she dared. Scowling, he closed his eyes and fell into a restless sleep where he dreamt was gatecrashing a Bon Jovi concert and attacking the performers with lady pillows.

The sun filtered through the blinds, right into Annie's face. She blearily peeled open her eyelids, wondering in confusion why her pillow was moving. It was only when she lifted her head that she realised she was lying half on top of Jeff and the baby was smushed somewhere underneath them. Feeling embarrassed, and hoping to God she didn't drool on him, Annie tried to slide away from him but the loss of warmth on his body made Jeff wake up.

He stared down at Annie, who looked like a startled rabbit. "Morning."

"Morning," she said quietly, forgetting that she was in the process of moving.

Jeff flinched. "What is that sticking into my back?"

"I think it might be Lucy."

"Lucy, you've got some 'splanin to do." Annie just gave him a quizzical look. "Nevermind." He reached his arm around and found the doll. "She's not crying. I think we killed her."

"Oh no!"

"Relax, I'm kidding. I'm sure she'll torture us again soon." He put the doll next to them and let his arm rest near Annie's side.

"About last night," Annie began, biting her lip.

"Let's just forget it, hey?" said Jeff. "Chalk it up to whatever the baby equivalent of mad cow disease is and agree to disagree."

Annie looked like she wanted to say more but found herself nodding. "OK." She then remembered where she was laying and who she was laying with. "Um, I guess we better get up and dressed then."

"Yeah," he glanced at his alarm clock. "Class is in an hour." But when he turned his attention back to her she was giving him that same look she gave him at the Transfer Dance before they kissed. He slowly let his arm drift over her back, making her shiver when his hand caressed bare skin where her t-shirt had ridden up.

"I change my mind," she said softly.

"About what?"

"Right now I think I choose 'kiss'."

They leant in towards each other, lips meeting gently at first before they lost themselves in the moment and their kisses became more urgent. Annie pressed herself closer into him as he threaded one hand through her hair and used the other to grab her waist to slowly roll her onto her back... right on top of Lucy. They both jolted apart when the doll let out an ear-piercing scream that went on and on like a car alarm.

Jeff leant his forehead against Annie's as they caught their breath. "Can we short-circuit her now?"

"No, don't be cruel," scolded Annie, but she was smirking. "We better get up for real this time."

"Did I mention how much I hate robot babies?"

"Just a few thousand times now."

Jeff and Annie were the last of their group to arrive in the study room. Annie took the spare seat next to Jeff so they could both keep their hands on the baby and noticed that their friends were in varying states of disarray. Shirley looked tired but happy with her baby wrapped up in a blanket, Troy and Abed had bags under their eyes but were chatting happily to Kickpuncher while they did something on Abed's laptop, Britta looked like hangover Britta, only without all the fun drinking the night before and Pierce was uncharacteristically subdued.

"So," said Jeff, "how was everyone's night of horror?"

"I had fun," said Shirley, smoothing down the doll's blanket. "It was nice to have a baby around the house again, and my boys and I spent the night chatting about when they were little."

"That sounds sweet," Annie smiled.

"It was," Shirley beamed, "they loved hearing about the time my eldest projectile vomited in the mall. And when my youngest went poopy in the bathtub."

"Sweet and not at all gross," Jeff added. "What about you, Perry? I see Pierce is still alive."

"Barely," he grumbled.

"Oh shut it, old man," snapped Britta. "I've had enough of your jibber jabber."

"She hid all my scratching tools to torture me," said Pierce. "I felt like my legs were on fire. And then she made me eat muesli for breakfast."

"You were going to eat honey out of a jar with your fingers!" Britta said in exasperation. "Unhygienic and unhealthy."

"You're not my mom!" He flinched at Britta's glare and held LL closer to him. "Can I at least have tater tots for lunch?"

"Sure, with a side of salad and no way in hell."

"Guys!" Troy interrupted excitedly, "Wanna see our family photo gallery?"

"Your what?" asked Jeff.

"Family photo gallery," Abed repeated. "We went through all the major milestones and posted them on my Facebook account." He turned his laptop around for them to see. "First pooey diaper."

"That's nice," smiled Shirley.

"I put a can of stew in the diaper to make it look authentic," said Troy proudly.

"First trip to the zoo – the diorama zoo we found in a classroom," Abed clicked onto the next picture. "First photo with Santa. That's Pavel dressed up in my 'Miracle on 34th Street' Santa outfit holding Kickpuncher."

"Isn't he adorable!" said Troy with a fond sigh. "Only cried once."

"Lucky bastard," Jeff muttered.

"How was your night?" asked Shirley, turning towards Annie and Jeff.

The two of them glanced at one another, masking coy smiles.

"Not too bad," said Annie. "We just watched TV and ate pizza."

Jeff nodded. "Yep."

"Well that's boring," said Britta, moving closer to Troy and Abed. "Show me more of the photos. I think I saw Kickpuncher wearing one of the outfits I put my cat in. It's the best."

The group turned their attention back to the boys leaving Annie and Jeff to themselves.

"So," said Jeff, "how long do I have to wear earplugs tonight for while you're on your date and I'm at home with Lucifer?"

Annie played with her hair. "Oh, I was thinking of cancelling tonight."

Jeff couldn't help his lip quirking up. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. I mean it wouldn't be fair if I went on a date when you couldn't."

"True."

"And Lucy needs both of us."

"Also true."

"And we didn't really finish our game properly this morning either," she added with a shy smile. "Happy fake parents equals a happy fake baby."

He grinned at her. "I take it all back. Robot babies are awesome."