Somewhere in the distance I dreamt I heard voices. Beautiful, sweet, melodic voices. Voices I knew. Carlisle and Alice. Definitely Emmett and Jasper too I think. And Edward. The sweetest voice of all. My Angel. And I knew I must be in Heaven, for where else could I be now, hearing my beloved's dulcet tones? I noticed absently that the sucking sensation on my hand had stopped, but the searing pain had moved all the way up my arm now, and started seeping into my chest. I didn't understand how I could be feeling so much pain in Heaven. The voices grew louder now.

"Oh no, Bella, no!" the Angel's voice cried in horror.

Behind that longed-for sound was another noise - an awful tumult that my mind shied away from. A vicious bass growling, a shocking snapping sound, and a high keening, suddenly breaking off......

I tried to concentrate on the Angel's voice instead.

"Bella, please! Bella, listen to me, please, please, Bella, please!" he begged.

"Yes", I wanted to say. Anything. But I couldn't find my lips.

"Carlisle!" the Angel called, agony in his perfect voice. "Bella, Bella, no, oh please, no, no!" And the Angel was sobbing tearless, broken sobs.

The Angel shouldn't weep, it was wrong. I tried to find him, to tell him everything was fine, but I felt like I was floating, deep under dark water. It was pressing on me, and I couldn't breathe. This couldn't be Heaven. Were they really here?

There was a point of pressure against my head. It hurt. Then, as that pain broke through the darkness to me, other pains came, stronger pains. The searing pain was worse now. It was scalding hot, burning me from the inside. I cried out, gasping, breaking through the dark pool. My eyes opened, but I couldn't focus. It was still only dark nothingness, and I felt frantic. I needed to see my Angel.

"Bella!" the Angel cried.

"She's lost a lot of blood Edward. Her injuries are very serious. She has many broken bones, and some internal bleeding I think. I, I don't know........." It was Carlisle, and his voice was pained.

"No! NO!" Edward screamed.

"I need to try and stabilise her, get some of the bleeding under control before we move her. Alice, find me some towels and something to brace her leg, it's broken." Carlisle demanded, his composure returned.

A deep growl bubbled up in someone's throat. Was that Edward?

Alice must have returned. She was only gone an instant before I felt a firm pressure on my head and my arm and various other places.

"Emmett, Jasper, I think you should leave." Carlisle again. Professional. In control.

The burning pain was getting worse. My hand felt as if it were alight. I strained for breath under the scalding heat of my lungs.

"Edward." I tried to tell him, but my voice was so heavy and slow. I couldn't understand myself.

"Bella, you're going to be fine. Can you hear me, Bella? I love you."

"Edward," I tried again. My voice was a little clearer.

"Yes, I'm here."

"It hurts," I whimpered.

"I know, Bella, I know" - and then, far away from me, anguished - "can't you do anything?"

"My bag, please......... Hold your breath, Alice, it will help," Carlisle promised.

"Alice?" I groaned.

"She's here, she knew where to find you."

"My hand hurts," I tried to tell him.

"I know, Bella. Carlisle will give you something, it will stop."

"My hand is burning!" I screamed, finally breaking through the last of the darkness.

His voice was frightened. "Bella?"

"The fire! Someone stop the fire!" I screamed as it burned me.

"Carlisle! Her hand!"

"He bit her." Carlisle's voice was no longer calm, it was appalled.

I heard Edward catch his breath in horror.

"Edward, you have to do it." It was Alice's voice, close by my head. Cool fingers brushed at the wetness in my eyes.

"No!" he bellowed.

"Alice," I moaned.

"There may be a chance," Carlisle said.

"What?" Edward begged.

"See if you can suck the venom back out. The wound is fairly clean." As Carlisle spoke, I could feel more pressure on my head, something poking and pulling at my scalp. The pain of it was lost in the pain of the fire.

"Will that work?" Alice's voice was strained.

"I don't know," Carlisle said. "But we have to hurry."

"Carlisle, I....." Edward hesitated. "I don't know if I can do that." There was agony in his beautiful voice again.

"It's your decision, Edward, either way. I can't help you. I have to get this bleeding stopped here if you're going to be taking blood from her hand."

"Would she survive the transformation?" Alice again, serious.

I heard that low throaty growl again.

"I don't know," Carlise sighed. "I'm not sure she can survive either way. Her heart may stop before the venom can work it's way through her whole system. But taking more blood to remove the venom is equally risky. I honestly don't know, if we can save her........" His voice was quiet then, the pain evident.

"No, Bella!" Edward sobbed, his voice barely a whisper now.

"You have to make a choice now son. There isn't much time. Either you let the venom continue to flow in the hopes that she is healed and transformed, or try to suck it out and we get her to a Hospital." Carlise was back in control again. I felt practised hands moving about me, gently poking, prodding and pressing.

"Edward PLEASE!" I screamed. "It's burning me!" My eyes focused then, and I saw my beautiful Angel. "His face was drawn. I watched his eyes as the doubt was suddenly replaced with a blazing determination. His jaw tightened. I felt his cool, strong fingers on my burning hand, locking it in place. Then his head bent over it, and his cold lips pressed against my skin.

At first the pain was worse. I screamed and thrashed against the cool hands that held me back. I heard Alice's voice, trying to calm me. Something heavy held my leg to the floor, and Carlisle had my head locked in the vice of his stone arms.

"Edward! You must stop son. Her blood is clean now, I can smell it. You're killing her." Carlisle's voice was calm but firm.

The sucking continued, but then, slowly, my writhing calmed as my hand grew more and more numb. The fire was dulling, focusing into an ever smaller point.

I felt my consciousness slipping as the burning pain subsided.

"Edward," I tried to say, but I couldn't hear my voice. They could hear me.

"He's right here, Bella."

"Stay, Edward, stay with me......"

"I will." His voice was strained, but somehow triumphant.

I wanted to close my eyes now, but I was afraid to fall into the black nothingness again, afraid I would lose him in the darkness of the heavy water.

"We need to keep her conscious. She's lost so much blood and she's got some serious head wounds. We need to keep her somewhat lucid until we can get her to the Hospital where they can properly assess the extent of her injuries. You did well son. I knew you could do it." Carlisle was all business again, but I detected a hint of pride in his voice.

"Bella," Edward gently prodded. "Where's Renee?"

A sharp pain tore at my chest. "Renee!" I gasped. Cool hands kept me pinned to the floor, minimising any further damaging movements. A new wetness gathered in my eyes and suddenly it became even harder to breathe. I clamped my eyes shut then, wishing that the memory would leave me. That it was false. But I knew I couldn't escape the truth now. "She's in the other room," I panted. "He killed her Edward, right in front of me. My mom is dead, and it's all my fault." The pain of this realisation hit me anew as Renee's lifeless eyes stared blankly up at me. I tried to shake my head to dislodge the image, but it wouldn't move. I opened my eyes and saw my pain mirrored in Edward's. A sudden breeze whirled past my head as I saw Alice come back into focus. She nodded her head sombrely as they all grimaced.

"I, I'm so sorry Bella." Edward's voice was pitiful. I could see that he would take this responsibility on himself.

"It's not your fault, Edward," I pleaded. I hoped I could convey the depth of my feelings to him. This was James's fault, and mine for leading him to her. Not Edward's. Edward saved me. And then I remembered my mothers words. "Stay alive Bella. He'll come for you."

"She knew," I whispered.

Edward looked at me, puzzled. "What Bella?"

"Renee. She knew Edward. She told me to stay alive because you'd come for me."

I saw the quick exchange of glances between Edward, Carlisle and Alice. Obvious they thought I was delirious and that I didn't know what I was saying. When I could, I'd set them straight. Renee knew. My mom knew that I'd be ok. And in spite of the pain that throbbed through every cell in my body, I knew then that I would survive.

"Don't worry Edward. I'm going to be ok," I said, my voice a little stronger and surer now. "She knew......" I trailed off, lost in the thoughts of my mothers final moments. And then the rest of it came crashing down. The whole horrible nightmare. The way James so casually broke her neck. The way he took such pleasure in flinging me around the room like an expendable toy. The way he touched me..........." I winced with a pain that had nothing to do with my broken bones.

Edward's eyes widened. "Bella, Bella, what's wrong? Tell me, where else does it hurt?" He was frantic now.

But I couldn't tell the Angel the source of my agony. He would blame himself of course, and I couldn't see him torture himself like that, anymore than I knew he was already going to. And something else. I was ashamed. In my mind I knew that James's actions weren't my fault. I knew that I wasn't strong enough to fight him off. But still, my heart ached for what he had done to me. I felt like a piece of my heart had broken off. It shattered when he touched me in that too personal way. And that was a piece of my heart that didn't belong to Edward anymore. That made me so angry, because Edward deserved my whole heart. Intact. Pure. I resolved to never tell Edward everything that had happened. And I would work every day to make the rest of my heart so full of love and devotion to Edward that he would never see what was missing.

"Bella?" Edward cried. "What..... what else happened?" He knew me so well. Knew when something was wrong. Knew when I was lying. But Renee had believed my lies in the end. Maybe Edward would too.

"I'm ok Edward." My voice was weak. I wasn't fooling anyone. I could feel myself slipping again. The blackness threatening to overcome me. I was in so much pain, I didn't know how long I could stay conscious. The blackness was so tempting. But something urgent occurred to me. "Renee! Edward, we can't leave her here like this. She'll be all alone!" I shrieked, panic bubbling up to the surface now. It really was hard to breathe, and all I could taste was blood.

"Shsh" he breathed calmly. "We'll take care of her now Bella." And then some rapid whispers, too low for me to hear.

"Alice!" I remembered.

"I'm right here Bella."

"Alice, you have to get the tape, both tapes. He knew you Alice. He knew where you came from. And my mom. She's on the other tape. I can't lose that. It's all I have of her now." I trailed off weakly, but my agitation was evident.

"Calm down Bella," Edward hissed smoothly. The disgust on his face obviously aimed at James, and knowing Edward, at himself for allowing this to happen.

"It's not your fault Edward," I repeated. "It's not. You saved me. Thank you."

He smiled my favourite crooked smile, and for a moment, all was right in my world. But I could feel myself being pulled down. Getting weaker. I was sure I was going to be ok. Renee had told me as much. But I was still scared to let myself drift again. Afraid that I might not be able to fight my way back. It wasn't over yet.

"I've done all I can do here," Carlisle said, his voice serious. "We have to move her carefully, and get her to a Hospital. Now!"

Edward was alarmed again. His eyes, deeply black I suddenly realised, boring into mine. "Will she....?" His voice was low and he couldn't bring himself to finish his question. But somehow I heard him and I knew what he was thinking. Or maybe I could just read it in his face.

"She's strong Edward. She's been fighting. If anyone can survive this, it's Bella. But I wont lie son, it's very serious. She's lost a lot of blood. Too much. And her internal injuries......" He grimaced, then so quickly I wasn't sure I even saw it, he smoothed his face into a calm, reassuring mask as he saw me staring at him.

I finally realised for the first time that Carlisle wasn't certain I was going to be ok. But I had to make it. Edward needed me. Charlie needed me. And I promised Renee. I was having trouble seeing again. Everything at the edges of my vision was dark and blurry. But if I concentrated very hard, I could still see Edward's anxious face. Yes, Edward did need me. He would blame himself for all of this. He needed me to survive so that I could convince him that it wasn't his fault. So that I could make him forget and be happy again. I relaxed at the images now floating through my mind. Happy memories of Edward and I. Laughing. Listening to music. Kissing and........... And James flashed into my mind again, and I shivered convulsively. Could I ever be happy again after this? It hurt everywhere and 3 pairs of ice cold stone hands pressed down gently on me to stop me from moving. And then I remembered the tape. James's horror movie, specially made for Edward. I was terrified. I'd told Alice to get both tapes.

I was panicked now. My mind was reeling. I needed to get the tape. He couldn't see the tape. No-one could see THAT tape. I tried moving and every fibre of my being screamed in agony. I wasn't going anywhere. "The tape. Must have the tape, please," I mumbled almost incoherently. I was getting weaker. But the anxiety had overtaken me, and I started shaking and convulsing uncontrollably. Suddenly I felt very very sick. I wrenched my head to the side and vomited. The last thing I saw was a gushing flow of blood spew from my mouth, and then everything went dark.

"Bella. Bella. Please love, can you hear me?"

I heard the Angels voice again. But everything was still dark, and my chest hurt so badly. The effort required to breathe in and out seemed too great. "Edward." I gasped, barely audible even to myself. "I don't feel so good," I admitted.

"I know Bella. I know. We're taking you to the Hospital now. You're going to be ok. You just have to hang on for me Bella. I know you can do it. You just have to hang on." His voice was pleading now. How could I refuse?

"I will Edward. I love you."

I felt a shift as Edward carefully lifted me into his arms, and he stood. He was cradling me so gently, but I couldn't even will my limbs to hold him back or nestle into him. I was limp. It was wrong not to hold my Angel. Why couldn't I hold him back? I think he needed me to.

I felt as if I was gliding as Edward carefully carried me outside and into a car. I thought I could smell smoke, but it seemed far away now. I couldn't exactly remember why I was here, feeling a certain numbness spread through me now, as though being carried along on a cloud. I was so tired. So very, very tired.

"Bella. Stay with me Bella." the Angel's voice commanded.

"I'm here Edward. I'm just so tired." I was barely whispering.

"Just a little while longer Bella. Just a little while and you'll be able to sleep. Just stay with me now."

"Okay." My eyes finally focused, and I found his face. I smiled, and it hurt. As if my face were somehow fighting against the subtle movement of my lips.

I don't know how much time passed as I lay cradled in Edwards strong arms, staring into his beautiful face. But suddenly, it seemed to me at least, there was a lot of commotion around me. I could feel the frisk night air against my skin and for the first time in what seemed like a very long time, I was able to take a deep, ragged gulp of fresh air. I was rewarded with a burning pressure as my lungs resisted against the movement, but it was worth it. And then I was lowered onto a bed and I was moving. It was very uncomfortable. My Angel's soothing icy hands were gone now, and I tried to frown at the loss. I was in a room with bright lights glaring down at me, blinding me. And more lights, like pinpricks of sun directly aimed at my eyes. There were many hands touching and pulling at me. But none of them were the familiar and comforting stoney arctic hands I craved.

There were voices. Lots of voices. But I couldn't understand them. Nothing quite made sense anymore. And then I felt very sick again. "I'm gonna be sick," I croaked, and suddenly a small bowl was thrust in front of me and the gushing blood was spewing forth again. It occurred to me then that vomiting blood probably wasn't a good sign. But before I could ponder the subject any further, the room started to swirl and the blackness pressed down on me again. Just before all the lights went out, I heard my favourite voice in the world. "Bella, STAY! Don't leave me!" Silly Vampire, I wanted to tell him. Of course I'd stay with him. But I couldn't find my voice, and then everything went dark.