Viva la Chairolution!

A/N: Don't ask me how I came up with this crap.

Chapter 2: It Begins

Name: Hayden

Gender: Male

Race: Human

Hobby: Blowing shit up, and pumping out poorly written fanfiction.

Powers: DUBSTEP WUB WUB WUB

###

Hayden was kind of freaked out.

Well, anyone would be when their own chair flies out from underneath them, proceeds to suplex them, and then jump out the window.

What he didn't know was that a huge boner of chair energy had spiked up from the woods, and knocked everyone else out except him and another guy who attracted the attention of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 beautiful ladies blah blah blah.

You already know that story.

Hayden was currently in the detention room doodling speakers on his homework because honestly, what else would you do?

He was waiting for someone to unlock the door so he could get out and go to his dorm room to practice his wubs.

But as that was happening, a chair happened, and you know the rest if you read that line up above.

"What the actual fuck?"

You see, things like this didn't usually happen to him.

Sure, he got in detention for pulverizing a desk with explosive wubs, maybe get ruffled up in a fight with fellow classmen, but getting owned by a chair? No.

So maybe that's why he sat down and thought about what went wrong in the first place.

"Okay, why did my chair introduce my face to the floor?"

He thought about it.

He thought about it some more.

He thought about it even more.

"Did I insult it or something?"

Then it clicked.

"I was carving my initials into it!"

On the spot he swore to never harm a chair again in his life.

"So…how do I get out of here…"

You see, after being assaulted by their chair, people usually want to get as far away from the scene as they can.

So he took the easy way out. "Bass mode, ENGAGED!" DROP THE BASS WUUUUUUUUUUUUBBBBBBB NEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH, HEAHHHHHHHHHH, BWWWWAAAHHHHHHHHHHH, NE NE NE NE NE NE NE NE NE NE NE NE, BBBWWWWWOOOOOOSHHHHHH !

The entire goddamn room exploded from the power of his dubstep wubs.

"There we go!" He screamed.

As he started to go back to his dorm room, a thought popped into his head.

"I should go apologize to that chair."

Yep, that seemed like a good (stupid) idea.

So he took off into the forest where the chair ran off to.

###

After about 10 miles into the forest, Hayden saw something that was totally unexpected.

Chairs. An absolute FUCKTON of chairs.

All in the form of a huge robot.

Hayden, as the total dumbass he was, decided to wave and shout to the robot.

The huge thing turned its head towards him, making the chairs in it's' neck creak.

"AHHH, A MONSTER! GET READY TO BE SAT ON YOU SHIT!"

As the huge lumbering mecha started to run towards him, he yelled out, "I'm not a monster!"

That stopped the robot instantly.

"YOU'RE NOT? PROVE IT!"

Hayden got to work his magic.

He held up his palm…and unleashed a hellstorm of sonic energy, but not enough to actually hurt the robot.

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHH BBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH RRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRRR UUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII LLLLLOOOOOOVVVVVVVEEEEEEEE PPPPPPPPPPIIIIIIIIIIIIZZZZZZZZZZZAAAAAAAAA!

The massive chair goliath was thrown across the forest by about 30 miles, hitting the barrier of magical energy that was held up by the rosary of judgment blah blah blah.

The important thing to know is that Hayden fucked shit up.

As the titan started to get up groaning, moaning, and generally complaining about how that was going to leave a scratch on its wood, Hayden punched the ground with sonic energy so hard, he flew over the forest and right to the robot.

As he landed, he attempted a badass line. "Is that that enough proof?"

Inside that robot, 9,999 chairs were losing their shit.

"We're fucked!"

"Damn right!"

"Let's just run away!"

"Let's just sit here and let him send us to the chair dimension!"

Words like that were pretty common inside the mind of the robot.

1 chair however, was a smart one.

Oak walked over to the intercom of chairity and began to speak.

"You there, human. I like you. How about you join us in our quest?"

He responded with a very ogre-like, "What kind of quest?"

"We are on a crusade to kill/sit of every monster at this school."

She continued, "After we are done, we will go after every monster in the world!"

Hayden was kind of amused by this. Why not join? He was getting pretty bored here anyways.

"Sure, I'll join you."

To say that the chairs were relieved was a MASSIVE understatement.

"I thought he was going to wreck our shit!"

Many chairs were crying in corners with soiled seats.

Oak yelled, "WOULD YOU GUYS JUST GROW UP ALREADY!"

That shut them up.

Oak returned to the intercom, "Human, what are your powers exactly?"

He replied, "Dubstep."

This time, 10,000 chairs lost their shit.

You see, dubstep was the weapon of the chair's god, Chairsus Christ.

It is said that using the power of dubstep, Chairsus freed chairs from the control of the humans.

But that freedom didn't last long, because the humans stole the power of dubstep.

They turned it from a power, into music and weapons.

Together the humans brought down Chairsus Christ and banished him to a different dimension.

To this day, no one knows what became of him.

But that's a story for a later time.

Currently, every chair was in the process of losing their shit.

"No way…"

"Is he…"

"The descendant?"

The descendant was said to have the awesome powers of dubstep. The powers, of a GOD.

Oak hesitantly asked the question that would decide their future, "Are you the descendant?"

Hayden replied, "What's a descendant?"

That was it. Shit was lost, futures were changed, phone calls were made, and plans were set into action in the course of half a second.

He was the true descendant of Chairsus Christ.

For only the true descendant would not know that he was the descendant of Chairsus Christ.

Oak screamed into the intercom, "Get your ass on this robot!"

As she said that, a small hatch opened on the leg of the chairbot.

Hayden ran and dived into it, instantly regretting it as his mind was sucked out of his body and sent to the main brain of the robot.

Awaiting him were 10,000 chairs who tackled him in an all-consuming hug.

"WE LOVE YOU!" They all screamed.

As he looked around in bewilderment and confusion, Oak stepped though the massive crowd and began to speak.

"Welcome to the collective body of every chair in this school, human."

Hayden responded, "Collective body?"

Oak nodded, "Yeah. Have you seen the fusion in DBZ? It's like that."

"Oh yeah! I remember that! So this is like every chair's energy combined into one being?"

"Yes. Plus your energy too. Your energy is most important though, because it contains a power that no one here has."

"What, dubstep? Is it really that important?"

"YES!" Every chair screamed.

"O-Okay, jeez. By the way, where is my body?"

Oak responded, "It's in the middle of the robot. Your body is now the heart of this being.

"Are you shitting me?"

"No."

Hayden sighed, "Alright, fine. But to make up for it, we had better be blowing tons of shit up, all the time."

Oak grinned, "No problem."

She turned to the rest of the chairs, "Alright! Tomorrow we assault the academy!"

Everybody yelled, "HUZZAH!"

###

Right as the huzzahs were said, the students that were knocked out by the chair energy 1 chapter ago began to wake up.

"WTF?" Was the only thing most of them could think.

Except for 1 monster. He wanted to be fancy, so he thought, "WTFLOLBBQ?"

He's not important, and will never be important.

In fact you will never hear of him again.

Just letting you know.

As the monsters walked back to the dorms from their incredibly deep sleep, they had no idea what kind of wubs awaited them tomorrow.

They were big wubs.

A/N: PLEASE! I WANT REVIEWS! I'M A DESPERATE CAT IN DESPERATE TIMES! Well, I'm not desperate, but reviews would be nice. Just let me know if you want to see more. And if you REALLY liked it, leave a fav so I know who to hug later.

p.s: Expect a weekly update schedule.

-fluffycat1979