AN//: Well here it is. "Your Eyes" from Rose's point of view. Thank you to everyone who reviewed "Your Eyes" and asked for this….Sorry it took so long to post! Hope you enjoy!

p.s. Italics in quotation marks signify singing. For the sake of the story, please just pretend it was a sacred tradition on Gallifrey to express grief in a song…hope you enjoy! HWF

Disclaimer: I don't own the songs "Goodbye Love" or "Your Eyes" They were written by Jonathan Larson for his masterpiece, Rent. I also don't own Doctor Who… wish I did, but ah well….

BR //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// BR

"Goodbye Love"

Rose Tyler stood before her office window, gazing out blindly at the obscured horizon, as rivulets of rain dribbled sluggishly down the glass. She leaned forward and pressed her forehead against the cool pane, shivering at the icy contact, and closed her eyes.

It had been three whole years since she'd lost Him…Her Doctor. For the first few months, that whole first year really, it had hurt too much to think about him. Work had sustained her, rapidly becoming her life. Yet, as time passed, she had learned to embrace the bittersweet pain of her memories, and now clung to them like a lifeline. Now, she often closed her eyes and stood just this way, picturing him as he'd been, imagined what trouble he was getting himself into now-without her.

Does he miss me? She thought to herself sorrowfully, tracing a finger down the window, absently etching invisible geometric designs she remembered from a lifetime ago into the glass. Does he miss me half as much as I miss him? Forcing the thought away, she expelled a gust of air, watched it as it briefly fogged the window, before vanishing. Gone, in an instant, just like her time with The Doctor. She turned away from the window and walked over to her desk. It was one of the few things left in her small office. Once it had been crammed with a few chairs, a computer, paperwork, people…now it was barren. All that remained was her desk and the lone cardboard box; waiting to be shipped. The box was full of bric-a-brac: a pen, hand held scanner, stapler, a broken piece of unidentifiable alien tech; she used it as a paper weight, and…a picture. Rose tenderly reached into the box and lifted up the precious image.

Sorrowfully she gazed down at the picture she held in her shaking hand. It was a picture her Mum had taken of her and the Doctor on one of their visits, not long after their terrifying encounter with the Wire. They were sitting together side by side on the moth-eaten couch in the living room, laughing at something the Doctor had said. Smiles lit up their faces as they gazed at each other in shared wonder, fingers of one hand intertwined, two friends united. Even blinded by the mist of tears the sight of his smiling face brought an echoing wisp of a smile to her lips. She traced the outline of his face with a trembling fingertip. She spoke to him in a murmur, though she knew he couldn't hear. "You don't want baggage without life time guarantee. You didn't want to watch me die…I just came to say goodbye love, goodbye love…goodbye." The words burned in her throat but eased the pain in her heart.

With a regretful sigh she slipped the photo into her pocket (something's are too precious to let go of) and went about taping the cardboard box shut. Wonder what he's doing now? She mused, as she shifted the box to the side of her desk to await shipping. In her minds eye she saw him, standing before her, brown eyes dancing, cheeky grin in place, his hand outstretched invitingly, waiting for her to grasp it-

A soft rapping on the partially open office door rudely shook her out of her daydream. She turned, intending to tell whoever it was to come back later, when she saw that it was Mickey. Her eyes widened, a deer caught in the headlights. Damn, she thought with a guilty wince, so much for sneaking out. She didn't say that, however, though she knew he could probably tell that's what she was thinking. "Uh, hi," she said. "Umm, come in," she said, gesturing to the space in front of her desk. "I was just…." Her voice trailed away and she looked away, hands blindly grasping the edges of the lone cardboard box.

Mickey walked in slowly, easing the door shut quietly behind him, then coming to stand in front of her desk, gazing about him sadly. Her office was practically empty.

"So it's true then?" Mickey asked quietly, not really needing the affirmation, but wanting it regardless. He'd only just heard the news a few minutes ago, and the fact that she hadn't seen fit to tell him hurt worse than if she'd slapped him. At her startled glance he grinned weakly. "Lisa, from Internal Affairs, told me."

"Mmmh," Rose said, "Yes, it's true. I'm leaving now for Torchwood 3- they've offered me a post."

"Oh…That's nice." He was quiet for a moment. "Were you even gonna say goodbye?" He blurted out. Her guilty silence was everything he'd feared. "My God, Rose, are you insane?" He exclaimed, hurt. "There's so much to care about, there's me, there's Jackie-"

"Mum's got Pete and Jamie," she said, referring to her little brother, a rambunctious little boy with a set of lungs to rival his Mum's.

"So do you!" Mickey exploded.

"You just don't know." Rose said, turning away.

"That's rich that is," Mickey growled; anger and hurt causing him to sound harsher than he intended. "If not me then who, Rose? Who are you to tell me what I know?"

Rose froze, uncertain. "A friend…." She replied slowly, unsure.

"Some friend you've been lately! I hardly know who you are anymore!"

"I'm the same person I've been for awhile now, Mickey," she whispered.

"Who's that then? Not the Rose Tyler I remember. I mean, all of us, we hardly see you anymore! You're always here! You spend more time at Torchwood than at home!" She opened her mouth to deny it, but he plowed on. "Do you know what they say, Rose? What people say about you?" She shook her head. "'Rose has got her work,' they say 'Rose lives for her work' and 'Rose's in love with her work.' You hide in your work!"

"From what?" She snapped; a brief flash of fire flared to life inside her, only to be doused out with his next words.

"From facing your failure, facing your loneliness…Facing the fact that you live a lie! Yes you live a lie," he shouted over her protests, "Tell you why, you're always preaching not to be numb, when that's how you thrive. You pretend to defend and observe when you really detach from feeling alive!"

"Perhaps it's because I'm the one left behind," She said, snatching up her purse and throwing herself around her desk, desperate.

"Poor baby," he muttered as she shoved past him. "He wouldn't like this, you know," he whispered, eyes blinking rapidly against the tears. She froze in the doorway. "The Doctor," he continued, realizing he'd hit a nerve. "He wouldn't want you to be like this."

"No more," Rose begged, hunching her shoulders against his words, as the scars braiding her heart ripped open a bit wider. "I've gotta go. I'll call," she said hurriedly over her shoulder. She shoved open the door and ran down the corridor, nearly running into Pete.

"Rose, there you are, I've been looking for you-"

"Please don't touch me," she said, edging away when he reached out. "Understand, I need-"

"It's alright," he soothed, noting the stricken expression on her face. "I'll tell Jacks you had to catch the train, couldn't make it to dinner, yea?"

"Maybe, could you?" She said, even as she raced for the elevators. Pete nodded, though her back was already turned. He and Mickey watched her go, quietly grieving for the young woman she'd been, and the haunted soul she'd become.

Rose rushed into the first available elevator, thankful that it was unoccupied. Desperately she punched in the button for the top floor, before sagging back against the wall, breathing raggedly. Choking back a sob, she fumbled in her pocket, searching. She felt the edges of the photo in her pocket and greedily grasped it, stroking its smooth surface. She struggled to find her voice through the lump in her throat, as the numbers on the elevator screen whizzed by. "Goodbye love, goodbye love. Came to say goodbye love, goodbye."

The elevator rocked to a halt beneath her feet and the doors dinged open. She surged out into the eerie gloominess of the Ghostwatch room; long since abandoned. The sight of the wall on the opposite end of the room was a blow to the stomach. She stumbled towards it, running, throwing herself against its unrelenting surface. "Just came to say, goodbye love, goodbye love…my love." She struggled against the choking sobs that gripped her, one hand splayed against the wall, blindly searching. "Hello, loneliness…"

Crying softly, she pressed her face against the wall, embracing the pain Mickey's words had reawakened like a bittersweet lover. For a long time she stood there, as memories bombarded her from all sides. After a time she grew silent, her breathing evened and, despite herself, the tears began to ebb. Finally, after what felt like hours, she straightened up slowly, preparing to go, when suddenly-

"This is a message for Rose Tyler," The Doctor's voice declared, resounding throughout the quiet room, as if he was there beside her. Rose froze, shock, disbelief, then hope rapidly surging through her one after the other. Eagerly she pressed herself against the wall once more, desperate to hear him again. Then, sure enough, it came again, like a breath of heaven to a damned soul. The Doctor's voice-was he singing?

"I should tell you, I should tell you," his voice broke and she heard him suck in a desperate breath. Her own lungs struggled to take in oxygen, hope's feathers beating rapidly against her ribcage. They drew breath in unison, and his soft yet vibrant baritone tenderly breathed life into her starving heart.

"Your eyes, as we said our goodbyes

Can't get them out of my mind

And I find I can't hide

From your eyes

The ones that took me by surprise

The night you came into my life,

Where there's moonlight I see your eyes

How'd I let you slip away? When I'm longing so to hold you?

Now I'd die, for one more day

'Cause there's something I should have told you

Yes there's something I should have told you

When I looked into your eyes

Why does distance make us wise?

You were the song all along

And before the song dies…

I should tell you, I should tell you

I have always loved you.

You can see it in my eyes…"

Rose gasped, her heart breaking and coming to life in the same instant, as the words she'd longed to hear him say confirmed what she'd known for so long. He loved her. Even after all this time had passed, he still….her heart broke as she felt him break. "Rose," he cried out, voice breaking with pain. "Oh Rose…"

"Doctor," she whispered voice thick. Then again, louder: "Doctor. My Doctor." She buried her face against the cold texture of the wall, eyes fluttering closed with a gentle sigh. "My Doctor," she repeated, breathless, hoping beyond hope that somehow, some way, he'd heard her…

BR //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// BR

AN: Well, there you go. As you can see, I left the ending open, so if anyone wants a conclusion chapter, I could write one…but it all depends on what you have to say. Should I leave it as it is, or give them some closure? Up to you!

Please read and review,

HWF