Author's Note: hey everyone! Well first of, I wanted to thank Moonsetta, Raphs No.1 Girl, raph'sgirl4ever and all those who reviewed my first chapter! thanks guys!

So it turns out that I won't be deleting this story after all. yay! *cheers*

This is the second chapter written from Leonardo's P.O.V. There isn't much action going on in this chapter...I needed to explain a few things before all the new stuff starts happening therefor, I apologise if it's a little boring! just bear with me for a while and I'll promise it'll get better. ( I hope!)

P.S the sentences that are written in Italics are Leo's memories of the past. Don't get confused!

OK, enough babbling! here's the next installment .Enjoy!

R&R PLEAAAASE !*begs*

Chapter 2. Guilt

Guilt. It is the fact of being responsible for the commission of an offense. A feeling. A remorseful awareness of having done something wrong or blameworthy. It is a feeling that can cause great pain; It can slowly destroy a person's mind. It can even lead one to the bricks of death only for the sake of being forgiven. But, what if you were not the one to be blamed? What if you you'd never deserved to carry such burden?

Leonardo was guilty. His guilt was slowly, but surly destroying him from the inside out. He had carried this feeling in his heart ever since he had lost his baby brothers, a part of his soul in that fire. He could've freed himself from it long ago but, the pain that this torturous feeling always left was the constant reminder of reality. The reality that had kept him going ever since. Because, Leo knew that as long as he was guilty, as long as he had someone to despise, even if it was himself or the world for playing this cruel joke on him; he could go on. He could live.

The memories of that night still tainted the blue clad turtle's mind. Every time he thought about them, he could feel everything. Every single detail and with every small sensation. The smell of burnt wood mixed with smoke, the heat of the fire, the fear in his heart, the sadness he felt when he realized that he would never see his brothers again. It was as if it was happening all over again. He remembered the anticipation he felt the moment Raph left his side…

"Save our baby brothers''. Leo's voice was above a whisper. He watched his red banded brother turn away from him and run towards the burning building. when Raph was out of sight, he gently closed his eyes. He always knew that this day would come. A day that he would give up his life for his brothers. He had accepted that fate long ago. And so, he was lying on the ground; surrendering himself to the fire that would soon take over him, burn his skin and eat him alive. He knew that this was going to happen; he just didn't know that it would hurt this much.

As moments ticked by, Leonardo's resolve in giving up his life for the grater good started to shake. He had thought that Raphael would find their baby brothers in a matter of minutes since the building was small and Raph was the strongest amongst the four of them. What was taking them so long? The leader's patience was coming to an end as worry filled his heart. He already knew he was going to die but, he had at least hoped to see his brothers one last time to make sure that they were safe. Before he could let go, he wanted to tell them how much they meant to him.

Leo wasn't sure how much more he could take. His head was pounding and his vision was unclear. It was probably because of the blood that was still pouring out of him, little by little. He was about to give up until a sharp pain shot through his left arm. It was the fire that was burning his skin and tearing his flesh. The pain was so insane that Leonardo found himself screaming over and over again; Stirring from side to side, trying to move away from the hellish fire. The more he stirred, the more he found it pointless and so he stopped moving and closed his eyes.

the blue clad turtle thought about his family; his father, his family he had sworn to protect ever since he could walk on his feet. He had given up every thing for their safety; He even had to sacrifice their love for him to do so. As the years went by, he'd become more distant from his brothers and had caused all of them, especially his immediate younger brother Raphael to resent him. But they'd put their issues behind them recently and were starting afresh. They were happy until, everything broke apart.

And now, as Leo was slowly slipping away and drifting to his eternal sleep, he heard someone. He sounded like Raph. Thank god they were okay. He waited to hear his other two baby brothers but, the only sound he heard was a loud boom. An explosion. And that was the last thing he heard before his mind went blank.

One year had passed since that night. At first, the explosion had been in the front cover of almost all the magazines in New York City'; The news kept reporting about it for one week straight and the investigation for finding any missing bodies carried out for two weeks. But after that, everything was soon forgotten as if it had never happened. But, the memories of that night were sketched in Leonardo's mind so clear that nothing and no one could ever erase them. "I wonder if there will come a day when I too would forget everything" Leo though to himself. But deep down. the blue banded turtle knew that such a thing was impossible.

Leonardo was staring at the ceiling, buried in his thoughts. He had stared at that ceiling for hours everyday, for the past year. He'd stared at it, not because he couldn't keep his eyes off of it but, for he was unable to move. He tore his eyes away from the ceiling and looked at the reason for his lack of movement for the first time in almost two hours. Raphael. His now, one and only baby brother was sleeping beside him on the bed; his head on Leo's plastron; right over his heart. Leo's attention went to his brother as he saw him starting to stir but never moving his head away.

"Mnnn….Nah…Ah!" Raph moaned. Clutching at the bed sheets as he started to shake. Leo didn't react when he did so; he just kept looking at his brother with pitiful eyes. almost immediately after that incident,Raph had stopped sleeping in his own remembered. He could still hear Raph screaming his lungs out in his room. He could still feel the pain. Leo shut his eyes tight and let the memories flow…

A gasp.

" Raph! Wake up!"

A chocking sound.

"No! Raph! Breathe….P-please"

His face turning blue.

"You need to breathe damn it! don't hold your breath!"

His pulse was weakening.

"D-don't leave me!"

Cries of sorrow.

His pulse was getting weaker.

" I need you"

Whispers…

He couldn't feel Raph's pulse anymore…

Leo shot his eyes open again and tried to push the memories away;They were all in the past after all. He knew better that anyone else that he could not change the past no matter how hard he tried.

Leo knew that the nightmares of that night were still haunting his brother. He knew what Raph was going through and that's why, even if he had to stare at that ceiling for hours or even days… He would. That was because his existence beside Raph was the only thing he had to offer. The only thing he was sure Raph wanted because, other than that there was no way he could know what he really needed. It was the only way for Leo to believe that he was still worth something, anything! A tool to help him with his heavy, eternal guilt. A way to make sure that he wasn't completely and utterly useless. He would never know what Raph really wanted ever again because…

"Are you okay?" Leonardo suddenly said in a gruff voice after being pulled out of his thoughts when he saw Raph stir once more and eventually, opened his eyes.

Raph looked around for a second and then nodded to Leo's question.

Yes. Leo would never because, his brother hadn't spoken a word ever since that accident…one year ago.

Why did Leo feel guilty? Was he really the one to blame? Only he knew.

He knew…

He was guilty. He was now and forever useless.

Soo how was it? Not too boring right? Reviewwwws NOW! =p