Mr Schmidt made himself comfortable in the cramped office, looking at the Celebrate! poster and the children's drawings on the wall. He wondered, with a tiny smile, if any of Grace's drawings were around as well.
He was about to check the tablet on the dusty table when the phone rang; he jumped slightly, chuckled and reached for the phone, but the voice that appeared to belong to a recording of a young and polite man filled the security room.
"Hello, hello? Uh, I wanted to record a message for you to help you get settled in on your first night. Um, I actually worked in that office before you. I'm finishing up my last week now, as a matter of fact." Mr Schmidt looked at the phone thoughtfully, so that naughty little Mr Fitzgerald wasn't the night guard before him, then. He wondered what made the young man so aggressive.
"So, I know it can be a bit overwhelming, but I'm here to tell you there's nothing to worry about. Uh, you'll do fine. So, let's just focus on getting you through your first week. Okay?" Mr Schmidt eagerly nodded, well aware that the voice on the phone couldn't see him, he chuckled again.
"Uh, let's see, first there's an introductory greeting from the company that I'm supposed to read. Uh, it's kind of a legal thing, you know. Um... Welcome to Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. A magical place for kids and grown-ups alike, where fantasy and fun come to life. Fazbear Entertainment is not responsible for damage to property or person. Upon discovering that damage or death has occurred, a missing person report will be filed within 90 days, or as soon property and premises have been thoroughly cleaned and bleached, and the carpets have been replaced." The night guard raised an eyebrow, was that even legal?
"Blah blah blah, now that might sound bad, I know, but there's really nothing to worry about. Uh, the animatronic characters here do get a bit quirky at night, but do I blame them? No. If I were forced to sing those same stupid songs for twenty years and I never got a bath? I'd probably be a bit irritable at night too. So, remember, these characters hold a special place in the hearts of children and we need to show them a little respect, right? Okay." Mr Schmidt thought he couldn't agree more as he fiddled with the tablet.
"So, just be aware, the characters do tend to wander a bit. Uh, they're left in some kind of free roaming mode at night. Uh... Something about their servos locking up if they get turned off for too long. Uh, they used to be allowed to walk around during the day too. But then there was The Bite of '87. Yeah. I-It's amazing that the human body can live without the frontal lobe, you know?"
Now that drew Mr Schmidt's attention, he sighed sadly. He remembered the bite; he wasn't there himself when it happened, nor were his kids -thankfully!-, but he remembered how it was all over local news for weeks. He personally loved the golden duo, Fredbear and Barneybunny. Thinking about the obvious Flintstones reference, he smiled; those two were really fun.
Then, of course, the bite had happened, it wasn't Fredbear's fault, nor was it the poor boy's, whose head was nearly crushed by the robotic bear's. The event, followed by the horrible murders committed by someone who was wearing poor Barney as their costume gave the owner the chance to 'retire' the golden animatronics and leave the spotlight to the newer ones.
The ones he was going to babysit from now on. "Uh, now concerning your safety, the only real risk to you as a night watchman here, if any, is the fact that these characters, uh, if they happen to see you after hours probably won't recognize you as a person. They'll p-most likely see you as a metal endoskeleton without its costume on. Now since that's against the rules here at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, they'll probably try to... forcefully stuff you inside a Freddy Fazbear suit. Um, now, that wouldn't be so bad if the suits themselves weren't filled with crossbeams, wires, and animatronic devices, especially around the facial area. So, you could imagine how having your head forcefully pressed inside one of those could cause a bit of discomfort...and death. Uh, the only parts of you that would likely see the light of day again would be your eyeballs and teeth when they pop out the front of the mask, heh."
Mr Schmidt snorted, now that was nonsense. The animatronics possessed AIs that were capable of learning, they'd never think someone was an endoskeleton!
"Y-Yeah, they don't tell you these things when you sign up. But hey, first day should be a breeze. I'll chat with you tomorrow. Uh, check those cameras, and remember to close the doors only if absolutely necessary. Gotta conserve power. Alright, good night."
"Goodnight." the night guard answered, giving the phone a tiny wave. He turned to check the tablet again, so this must be how he was going to check the cameras. He turned it on and idly scrolled through cams, briefly stopping to check Pirate's Cove, when did Foxy go out of order? He sighed as he easily got used to using the tablet -he might be old, but he wasn't that old, thank you very much-, the overly excited pirate never ceased to bring a smile to children's faces.
He returned to Dining Area, noticing Bonnie had left; he bet the bunny was on his way to the security office, so instead of going out to meet him, Mr Schmidt waited for the animatronic to come to him.
He remembered the time the four animatronics met their audience. Bonnie was supposed to introduce himself as Barney, as he was the descendant of Barneybunny, so to speak, but having a Boston accent, it sounded more like "Bonnie" than "Barney". Oh how the little ones laughed, saying he was a boy with a girl's name! The poor thing had tried to say his name wasn't Bonnie to no avail, then had simply given up.
Mr Schmidt was rudely taken back to here and now when he heard loud footsteps from his left. Turning to the source of the noise, he saw two buttons at arm reach. He pushed the one that said "light", suddenly illuminating the violet bunny. The animatronic froze mid-step, his upper body already in the room and a mean grin on his face.
"Oh hello, Bonnie!" the night guard smiled, waving at him, "Did you come here to say hello?"
Bonnie screeched.
After holding his chest in a surprised and offended manner for a few seconds, Mr Schmidt took a step towards the hostile bunny.
"Bonnie! How rude!" he said disapprovingly, even waggling a finger near the bunny's angry red eyes. "Get out this instant!" He pushed the surprised bunny out of his office, "And don't come back until you've thought about what you did. You should be ashamed, young rabbit!"
Bonnie was so surprised that he didn't even flinch when the metal door slid down with a loud thunk!. He turned and made his way to the Dining Area.
Foxy peaked through his curtains as Bonnie rumbled past him, "What in the blazes was that, lad?!" he hissed, clearly surprised and disappointed. Freddy stopped glaring at the camera for a second to look at the two without moving a gear, his azure eyes showed he shared the pirate fox's feelings.
"Ah don' know, man!" Bonnie said, throwing his arms in the air exasperatedly, "Ah get in da office ta get that human and he freakin' lectahs me!" He looked frustrated enough to tear off his own whiskers.
Chica tsked from the other side of the room, "You're no good, Bonbon, I'll go show you how it's done." She let out a hearty laugh at the bunny's angry expression and quietly made her way to the security office- well, as quietly as a huge robotic chicken can, at least.