The warm bed was a welcome relief from the cold stone floor where I first regained consciousness. It was soft, a cozy blanket was placed over me, tucked in tight. I could spent a hundred years in this bed. My ribs still ached, my head was pounding. But, this bed was really damn comfortable.

I knew this bed. It was my bed, Shinji's bed. I slept in it every night, it shouldn't be a huge thing, right? Waking up in your own bed-oh, ow. The pain in my head pulsed like a second heartbeat. It hurt enough for me to free my arms of their comfy prison to massage my temples. My eyes flickered open, only to close again from the harsh light. My brain was screaming at me, I rolled over and pulled the pillow around my head. The room was silent, the lights were off, but my senses were running on overtime. Everything hurt. Every sound, every sight, every sensation.

Staring at the inside of my eyeballs caused me pain.

I knew what was wrong. I don't know how, but I knew. This wasn't my body. This wasn't my brain, and no amount of magic could change that. I was too big for it. I didn't fit right, it was like trying to jam a puzzle piece in the wrong spot. You could get it to fit, but something had to bend, to be warped. So I laid there, curled up in a ball, hoping the pain would stop eventually.

I was so wrapped up in the agony of my own existence, I almost missed the small cry of, "Nii-san."

I risked opening a single eye, and saw a little girl staring at me. Sakura, my sister. I knew her, I remembered every interaction with her, as Shinji. Not from a viewer of the show's perspective, but I remember the experiences as though they were my own. And, I realized, they were. It hit me like a lightning bolt.

I was Shinji Matou.

Oh. Oh, OH!

Duh. I was Shinji Matou. More specifically, I wasn't, then I died, then I was! I was reincarnated as Shinji. My soul was scrubbed clean of every thought, memory, and experience I ever had as the me of before and then it was put in the body of Shinji Matou. I didn't self-insert, I was Shinji, I just didn't remember.

I was always me, the memories were just lost on the trip. Whatever Zouken had done had made me remember, made me wake up! He was probably hoping whoever Shinji was in a past life would be more useful than the current model. Ha. Joke's on him.

I realized throughout my entire realization, I had been staring at Sakura. Oh, oops. This just became awkward. My eyebrows were probably following the path of my astonishment too…

Through the pain I tried to smile at her. She just tilted her head at me, like a curious bird. She was a weird kid, I remembered that too.

My eyes slide shut again, the agony in my brain becoming unbearable. I feel a small hand grab mine, I open a single eye again. Sakura is trying to put a cup in my hand. It's pretty adorable, not gonna lie. I smile at her again, it comes out more of a grimace. Sitting up at that moment is the single most difficult thing I've ever done, but I do it. I hold the cool glass, and try to sip.

That was a mistake. It was probably some magic potion or something, because that was absolutely vile. Urgh, like asparagus and pig's feet. Sakura's tiny hands darts out, catching my head and the glass, forcing me to down the rest. I glare at her with little effect.

Suddenly, my fingers start to go numb. The glass slides out of my boneless fingers, shattering on the floor. Everything is getting foggy now, my vision is becoming blurry. I try to look at Sakura again, she just gently pushes me down on the bed. Oh, I can't feel my body anymore. Like I'm at the dentist, but with magic.

My eyes slide shut again, the pain in my head fades, I don't fight the coming sleep.

Waking up again was strange. This time, my eyes slid open easily, the only pain was coming from my still mending ribs. I twisted my head around, searching for the inevitable agony, but it never came. I looked to the side, Sakura was gone. There was a glass of water left on the bedside table. I drank greedily, my lips were chapped from dehydration. Once I drained the glass, I fell back into bed, still exhausted from the mind bending agonies that were forced on me. I tried to think of something else, I hated pain, didn't have the stomach for it.

Something was off.

I looked around the room, I didn't have time to examine it earlier, too busy with the whole writhing in agony thing. It was my room. I realized what was different.

I couldn't feel the separation now. There was no jagged tear when the memories stopped being Shinji's and started being mine, they were just mine. But that wasn't right either. Shinji and I had the same soul, we were just two different guys using it at two different times. There was no 'my memories' or 'his memories', just memories. Huh. Weird. Is this what epiphany feels like?

I wasn't the child or the young man, I was just me. I was us. Both? The English language isn't really designed for transferring these ideas. Oh, and I knew Japanese now too. Well, Japanese as far as an eleven year old knew. That's pretty convenient, it beats the hell out of Rosetta Stone. Japanese doesn't help convey the concept any easier.

So, here I am. Shinji Matou, the biggest asshole in the Type Moon universe. Well, there was always Zelretch-OH I BET HE HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS!

The biggest Troll in the uni-no, the OMNIverse! He had to have done something! I breathed out a sigh.

It was no use really, he was basically as close to a god as a guy could get. And I was Shinji. Not a lot of bargaining power there.

I laced my fingers behind my head. Here I was, trapped in the Type Moon universe for the foreseeable future. I tried not to whimper. Of all the realities, why, WHY did it have to be this one! This was probably the absolute worst place to reincarnate into.

God, I would take a thousand sparkly Edward Cullen's over ONE Dead Apostle Ancestor. The vampires here are SERIOUS BUSINESS. If those guys ever got their shit together and really tried, humanity would be kinda screwed. Like, Land of Steel screwed. Oh god, that's the future here, the Notes. If you haven't heard of it, here's a hint: it's not a good time.

Plus the Counter Guardians, plus Primate Murder, plus the TYPE's, plus all of the other messed up shit that spewed out of Nasu's brain! Urhg, this would be a struggle and a half just lasting until the start of the Grail War.

PLUS THE GRAIL WAR!

There was that unavoidable THING hanging over my neck. Oh wow, I'm realizing just how much I could screw with things. Ha. Maybe Zelretch had a point? NO, bad thoughts, bad thoughts!

Right. I'm an eleven year old Shinji. I'm in a unique position to fix a lot of stuff before it goes so wrong only the Counter Guardians could fix it. And that would mainly involve indiscriminate slaughter.

I need to make a list or something. First things first, Sakura. She's my little sister. And I love her. Shinji loved her. However the pronouns situation works out, there is a great deal of affection there. Zouken hadn't spoiled that relationship yet, and if I have my way, he won't get the chance. Shinji-BA, before awakening, had cared for her at a distance. She was the one with magic circuits, he knew that. It hadn't evolved into jealousy yet, which was good. But he wasn't the world's best brother either. That would need to be fixed, I decided.

God, I really felt for Sakura through the visual novel. A kid pawned off to an asshole that just throws her in the, *shudder*, bug room. And Kariya! That was pretty tragic too, and Sakura's got to carry that with her, all of the time. She's just a kid, nine years old. She shouldn't have to hold that burden. I wanted to help her. Me, the Shinji Matou-PA, post awakening. I want to do everything I can to help her get out of this messed up situation.

But how the hell could I do that! I was Shinji Matou! Genre savvy, yes, magic-less, also yes. Zouken Matou was hundreds of years old. He probably had more than a few terrifying tricks up his sleeves. Plus all those, *shudder*, bugs. But, I couldn't sit and do nothing. Sakura's just a kid. She's innocent, and she needs someone to help her. Kariya failed, so someone's gotta try. Might as well be me.

So, the goal is to stop Zouken and help Sakura. Byakuya was a non-problem. He had few magic circuits and little ideas on how to use them. Zouken was the real problem. And there was no solution in sight, other than calling an exterminator. Ha.

OH! OH SHIT! PROBLEM SOLVED BITCHES!

I forgot, the world's greatest exterminator lived right down the street! And his name was Emiya Kiritsugu.

'Oh yeah, I'm good at this,' I thought, as I, once again, drifted off to sleep.

The next time I woke, it wasn't peaceful. I woke up paralyzed, molten hot steel was being poured inside my head. I tried to scream, no sound came out. I tried to thrash around, to escape the untold agony, but it was useless. I couldn't move, I wasn't tied up or locked down, my muscles just wouldn't obey. My body just decided it wouldn't move, it was so hot, I was burning. From the inside out, I was burning. I couldn't even scream. That was terror. Absolute pain and no way flee, no way to deal with it. I could only sit and wail in the confines of my own mind. I couldn't even open my eyes to see what was happening.

Was I dying?

An eternity or an instant later, the pain faded. Slowly at first, then rapidly, the agony left me.

Suddenly, my muscles listened to my command. I curled up into a small ball, hiding from the pain. I cried.

"Useless." Dimly, I recognized that voice, it was Zouken, my grandfather.

"How remarkable. Still useless. All that time and resources, all for nothing." Zouken scoffed, I heard his cane strike against the floor as he left, his footsteps were silent. I was alone again.

I stayed like that, crying, curled up in my bed, for a long time.

The reality of my situation hit me. I didn't belong here, and I didn't want to be here. I was just a guy, I wasn't some kickass wizard. I had no special powers, no magic. I was just me, just Shinji.

But I was trapped. Zouken had done something, something that had made me remember my last life. And here I was. Stuck in the body of an eleven year old. I was trapped here, never to see my friends or family again. Even if they did exist in this messed up universe, I couldn't say I knew them. I was Shinji, not the friend, brother, or son that they knew. Maybe there was an alternate version of me here, someone who didn't get hit by a truck, someone who would live to graduate college, have a family, someone who would get to build a life.

I wasn't that person anymore. I was Shinji Matou. The trash of the Matou clan, the useless heir.

I was so wrapped up with my angst-ing, that I missed light creaking of the door as it opened. I didn't hear the small footsteps patter up to my bed. I didn't hear a small, sad sigh.

I did, however, feel the small hand brush through my now-blue hair.

"Nii-San, don't be sad." Sakura said.

I looked at her, though tears of pain and sadness. She was Sakura. The person I had resolved to help, was trying to comfort me. Ha. That's irony, right?

I brushed the tears from my face and smiled a watery smile at her. I reached out my hand to pat her head. She was trying to comfort me, but that was backwards. I wasn't the one who needed comfort. I was a man trapped in the body of a child. She was a child, trapped in a horrible, horrible situation. I was her brother, I had to comfort her.

"Don't worry Sakura, everything's gonna be okay now." She didn't understand, she was young. She didn't know the weight of the promise I just made. But I knew.

I may have lost my friends and my family, but I gained a little sister. A little sister that needed someone to save her. And maybe, she wouldn't have to wait for Shirou this time.

To answer some comments:

MadoMado- If Prismaverse has PMMM as a show, what would Sakura, Shirou and Kiritsugu think of it?

Sakura would think it's adorable. Those Magical Girls have it good compared to her

Kiritsugu would know that Homura is best girl

Shirou would want to be Sayaka…

Bakarina-

I've never heard of that, it sounds hilarious though.