7 Weeks Ago – Max

She smiled, as she looked down at her phone. Luc…No, I need to stop this. Am I flirting with him? Oh, he always could make me laugh. I need to laugh more. Texting back a response that was way too flirty, she hit send before she lost her nerve.

"Sweetheart?"

She looked up. "Sorry. Sarah. Wedding stuff."

He looked at his wife. Something is up…she's nervous about this "We're going to be late."

Fertility, she thought, I know I can have a baby. I know I can get pregnant. I never told him…I can't now. "Do you think that maybe we should keep trying like we have been?"

"It's been two years of trying."

Tests, she thought, can they tell I had an abortion? What if I can't ever… "I know. What if there is really something wrong and…what if I can't?"

He pulled her up with him, brushing her hair back. "Do you want to have kids?"

"More than anything."

"I love you. We're going to make a beautiful family."

Max smiled at him with that. I can do this…if I have to tell them, I will. I want to be a mom. "Okay."

Present – Lacos House

Max laid in bed, staring up at the ceiling, all cried out. It's over. He hates me…he should hate me for what I did. Spent three days in bed with Lucas…we…it was like being a teenager again with how we were. How could I throw away my marriage? Would I have ever told Kenny if I wasn't pregnant? Would I told him if Luc was white and I could pretend the baby was his?

"Max!"

She jumped off the bed at Kenny yelling her name. Oh, he's mad…he should be mad. Be sad…humble…apologize…let him yell. I'm pregnant with another man's baby.

"Hi," she softly, as he just looked at her. He's never…not ever looked at me with such…not hate. Revulsion? He's revolted by me. "If you need the house…I can go and…"

"To him?"

She winced at that. "No."

"Who is he?"

"His name is Lucas. I dated him in high school."

"Did you screw him then too?"

"Yes. He was my first love…it just…I was really drunk with Sarah, and we just…Kenny, I am so sorry. I know that doesn't mean anything."

"You went to bed with him. You let him touch you."

For three days. Three days of sex, laughing and talking…our lost chance. "I did. I'm so sorry. I love you and…it was a mistake. I'm so sorry."

"And he knocked you up."

She nodded. "He did."

"Does he know?"

"No. I'm going to tell him…And let him choose how involved he wants to be."

"Don't tell him."

Max looked at him with that. "What?"

"Let people think it's ours."

Max gulped at that, seeing how he was looking at her. "Kenny, what?"

"I can't knock you up…we can't have a baby. This can be ours."

Lucas, who held me when I sobbed in his car after. Told me how much he loved me, even as he cried along with me. He told me what a great mom I'd be when we grew up…that he wanted to have babies, marry me, and that he would always love me…I can't take another baby away from him. "You want to raise another man's baby."

"It would be ours."

She touched her stomach. "You…you want to make this work?"

6 -Weeks Ago – Max

Saw this. Thought of you.

Max smiled as she looked at the picture of a puppy wrestling an empty tequila bottle. I need to stop…he's in Vermont. It's not like I'm hopping into bed with him…again. Is it an emotional affair?

I'm a drunk dog?

They ex-rayed and probed my uterus and took a sperm sample from Kenny. I can get pregnant. Or at least I could.

You are far from being a dog, Darlin. You're an adorable drunk.

Adorable?

Very adorable. When are you back in VT?

Max stared at her phone with that one. I can't. Not again… I'm trying to have a baby…I can't sleep with Luc again.

Do you miss me?

Every day.

Present – Lacos House

"You're my wife, Max."

She looked at him for a long time with that. "Do you still want me to be your wife?"

"You know I don't believe in divorce…even if my wife cheated on me."

She winced at that. "I'll spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I love you, even if you don't believe me, I love you. I just…people will know this baby isn't yours."

"How? Did your lover post videos? You announce it to the world that you whored it up with him?"

Let him. I cheated on him. I hurt him. I'm pregnant by another man. "No. It was…it was just the two of us. Lucas is black, Kenny."

"What?"

Hurt, she thought, I shattered his heart. For what? A weekend affair? I hurt the most important person in my life. "He's black."

"And you're having it."

She nodded. "I am. And I'm telling Lucas…he deserves to know."

"How considerate you are to him."

Max gulped at that. "You can hate me. I deserve it."

"We're not getting divorced. You're not running off with him…and that thing in you."

Max stared at him for a long moment. "I don't want to run off with him. I screwed up, I got drunk and…I never wanted to hurt you. I didn't…I wasn't ever going to tell you. Until…the pregnancy. Finding out you were sterile and…I couldn't…Damn it. Kenny, I love you. I married you…I want to spend my life with you. This baby…what I did…I won't make excuses. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for hurting you, betraying our marriage and…I love you. I love this baby."

"His baby. Your black baby."

"My biracial baby."

"How are you going to explain that?"

8-weeks ago: Max

"We still have three minutes," Lucas smiled, combing through her long hair. "Let me enjoy them."

Max smiled at him, as he interlocked both his hands with hers in the airport lobby. "Thank you."

"For servicing you sexually?"

She laughed at that, resting her head on his chest. "Yes. It was fun and…I really needed this."

"Are you happy? Do you love him?"

Max looked up at that. "I do. We're just…all this trying to get pregnant, work…it's been hard. He's a good man."

"You're going to be a great mom. I knew it then and I know it now."

"Do you think we would have made it work if I kept it?"

"Your parents would have run me out of town if they knew. You would have run with me."

She nodded. "I would have…I would have followed you anywhere."

He broke into a grin. "We were young, Darlin. We would have been two high school drop out with a baby…but…I think we would have been happy. We would have made it work, I loved you so much, Max.

"I loved you too."

He combed through her hair again, before kissing her one last time. "Go home. Be happy. I'm glad we got to do this, to spend this time together."

She nodded, as they reluctantly broke apart. "I'll see you around, Lucas."

Present – The Lacos House

"That I cheated. That I had an affair," Max said softly. "That you are a good man who gave me a second chance."

Kenny looked at her with that. "A second chance?"

"You said you didn't want a divorce and you wanted to pass this kid off as yours."

"It doesn't mean we get a second chance."

"What do you want from me then?"

You, he thought, I want who I thought I married. The woman who I promised to spend my life with. Who I love…who I still love despite what she did. Pregnant…crying…I still love her. I believe her and…Max. My Max. Everyone is going to know what she did.

"I'll do whatever you want."

He looked at her. "Is that what you told him?"

She winced at that. Three days…with Luc. Drunken and blurry sex aside, the rest was…I never talk about the abortion and the hurt it really caused. He's the only one. "It was just sex."

Kenny looked at her for a long moment, as she wrapped her arms around herself and sunk onto the sofa. Tears, shaking, my pregnant wife. My pregnant wife who cheated on me. Who I love more than anything in the world. "Max."

"I'm sorry."

"I need some time."

She looked at him for a long moment. "I'll give you whatever you want."

"What do you think this Lucas will want with your baby?"

"He'll want to do the right thing. He's a good person."

"Who slept with my wife."

She winced at that. "Yeah."

"What is the right thing according to him?"

She gulped. "He'll want to be part of it's life. I know that."

"So, the man that you slept with, betrayed our vows with, is going to be part of our life together? I'll have to see him, knowing that you and him…that it's your kid with someone else."

She looked at him with that. "Yeah."

"Max, I don't know if…I need some time."

She nodded. "Okay."

He sat down next to her, combing through her long hair. My Max… "I need you."

5 Weeks Ago: Max

What do you call bees that produce milk?

Max looked at her phone, at his joke of the day. Smiling to herself. Clue me in.

Boo-Bees

Oh, that's bad.

Are you laughing?

No…it's too awful this time.

Why did the mermaid wear seashells?

Oh, stop.

She grew out of her B-Shells.

Oh, that's worse.

I miss you, Max.

She felt her heart thump harder at that. It is different with him than it is here with Kenny. Kenny and me…fertility tests. How I kept getting my period. How I have a clean bill of health and no reason not to be able to get pregnant

I miss you too.

Present: The Lacos House

Max turned her cellphone over in her hands as Kenny went for a run. He wants to make us work. We can work. Lucas. I need to tell him…this is the second time with him. Hitting dial before she lost her nerve, she chewed on her lip.

"Well, hello."

"Hey," she said softly. "It's not a bad time?"

"I always have time for you. Are you calling for one of my hilarious jokes?"

She groaned despite herself. "The one you send me every day is enough."

"What's up?"

Just tell him. It's not like we haven't been here before. We're not 16 anymore. "I'm pregnant."

"Yeah? Come on, you knew you weren't infertile. Congrats, Darlin."

"Kenny is sterile."

"Max?" he asked, as what she said hit him. "What are you saying? Ah, did I get you pregnant again?"

"Yes."

"Does he know?"

"Yes."

"Where are you?"

"Home…He's out for a run. He didn't want to be here when I told you."

"Are you okay? How are you feeling?"

"I'm okay. Just morning sickness. Kenny is…he didn't take it well…but we're going to try to make it work. Lucas…I don't…I don't know how much you want to be involved and…Whatever you…"

"It's our kid, Darlin. I want in. No trip to Canada this time."

"He doesn't know that part. I also said it was once…one time…not a whole three days in bed with you."

"You really love him."

"I do…and I hurt him the worst way I could."

"I want to be there for you."

She bit her lip at that. Our baby. Kenny will lose it. It's Lucas' baby. "You want to see me get fat?"

"I didn't think we'd have a second chance at a kid together. Max," he said seriously. "I know you're married, and what we did together…I don't regret it."

She laid her hand on her stomach and thought of the tiny life in there. "Neither do I."

One Month Later – Jill's Office

"There," she said, pointing out the small shape. "There it is."

Max stared in wonder at it. My baby. "She's so tiny."

"She?"

Max looked up at that. "It feels like a girl."

She's alone, Jill thought, Kenny has been out at bars solo a lot this past month. They still live together, they work together…but…a source of gossip. That he isn't happy about her being pregnant. "How are you?"

Max looked back at the screen. "How can I be anything but good with that growing in me?"

"You and Kenny?"

Separate bedrooms…barely speaking. Co-existing. He tells me he loves and needs me and pushes me away. I need to give him the space he needs. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Max."

"I cheated on him and am having another man's baby. It's not something I want to talk about."

"And the father?"

"He calls me every day to check in. He's excited about this."

"And you?'

"I always wanted to be a mom. Are we done?"

"Do you want to go and get a cup of coffee?"

She shook her head and pulled down her tank top or her still flat three-month-pregnant stomach. "I'm just going home."

"Max," she said, as she opened the door and froze. "Are you okay?"

"Luc?" she asked freezing. "What are you doing here?"

He looked at her for a long moment before breaking into a grin. "You're glowing. What do you think I'm doing here?"

She gulped at that. For our baby, our second one. Oh, he shouldn't look at me like this. This is why I end up in bed with him…He's always looked at me like this.

"I thought we should talk," he said, taking her hand in his. "Face to face about our kid in there."

She nodded, well aware of how Jill was looking at her. "We should…Uh, do you want to go get a coffee?"

"Tequila shots are out for you."

She smiled despite herself. "You know I love tequila."

"I know how you get with it," he grinned. "I missed you."

Max held his gaze. Someone who actually isn't looking at me with scorn or pity? Oh, Jill looks shocked…how did I get so close to him? He shouldn't be touching me, holding my hand, touching my waist…way too intimate if I'm trying to save my marriage. Taking a long breath, she stepped back. "Um, there is a coffee shop on the corner. On me."

He dropped his voice for only her to hear. "I've been on you before."

She flushed at that. "I'll me you there in a few minutes. Out the door, go right."

He pressed his lips to the top of her head. "See you a few, Darlin."

"Max."

She looked up. "I wasn't expecting him."

Jill just looked at her. She likes him…she was flirting with him. Holding his hand, he kept touching her…what would she have done if they were alone? "You shouldn't be alone with him."

"I'm a big girl Jill. I can take care of myself."

"What is Kenny going to think?"

Max looked at her. "He's going to hate it."

"Do you want to make your marriage worse?"

"He's the father of my child. I can't just ignore him."

"You touched him, he kissed you, and called you darling."

Darlin, she thought, he always called me that. It was nice to be touched. "We have a lot of history."

"Max, wait."

She turned back to look at her. "What am I supposed to do? Kenny won't even talk to me except to say…he doesn't believe in divorce. He should hate me. I did an awful thing and destroyed our marriage and he has to see me every day…like this. Growing this baby that he…I deserve how's he's treating me."

"What are you two going to do?"

"He doesn't believe in divorce," she repeated. "He told me he loves and needs me…but he won't talk to me. Come near me. It's like living with a stranger. I don't want to raise this baby in a house like that…and I love him. Despite what I did, I love him."

"Then why did you do it?"

Chemical attraction, she thought, our past, alcohol. "I can blame the alcohol, it played a part. An initial part. We have history, we went through some things together when we were very young, and…it just happened. And it was fun, I can tell him things…like how worried I was I couldn't get pregnant because of the abortion…that Kenny can't know about it. He doesn't believe in divorce or abortion and…Lucas made it okay."

"Max," Jill said softly, just looking at her with that. "Do you have feelings for Lucas?"

"Not like that. I'm not, we're not," she started, resting her hand on her stomach again. "We shouldn't have done what we did, but…I don't regret this baby. I regret hurting Kenny. I need to go."

Present – Sherriff's Station

"You and Max should come," Carter said. "She and Sue can compare notes."

Kenny looked at him with that. Sue pregnant too…six months to Max's three. Max. Who I can barely look at. Who is glowing and radiant with this baby in her. His baby.

"I'll check with her."

"How's she feeling?"

Not vomiting, he thought, she's trying. She makes coffee, cooks for me, although badly, she's trying, I need to talk to her. Can I raise this baby with her? Can I trust her again? I love her…that isn't the problem. "She's good."

Carter looked at his old friend for a long moment. Something is wrong, the gossip is right. "You guys should come."

Present – Coffee Shop

"You look nervous. Since when are we nervous together?"

Max looked at him with that. "This is different. I live here, Lucas."

"Ah, you're embarrassed to be seen with me?"

She shot him a look at that. "I'm trying to save my marriage after our…thing…and you getting me pregnant."

"I didn't get you pregnant on my own," he teased dropping his voice and grinning at her. "You were there, Darlin."

Three days, she thought, how could I have done this? And it was good…fun…he's making me smile, even now. Stop flirting. "I know…I'm not blameless in this. Kenny and I want to work it out…he doesn't believe in divorce."

"I know you love him. He's a lucky guy."

She shot him a look at that. "Lucky? I cheated on him and got pregnant. He…he wanted to pretend that this was his baby. He didn't want me to tell you. I couldn't, Lucas…I couldn't take another baby away from you."

"It would be kind of obvious that it wasn't his."

Max looked down, as he squeezed her hand in his. Would I have if I could have passed this baby off? Could I have done that? To save my marriage? She looked back at Lucas. "I know."

"Would you have? You know, if I was some white guy?"

"That's a moot point…this is you and me. There is too much…Do you want to be part of this baby's life?"

"Did you think I wouldn't?"

She squirmed at that. "I mean, it's you and me. We live across the country, we have a lot of history…I really think Kenny hates you."

"No offense, but I don't care what he thinks. Our weekend together, baby aside? I loved our time together, I like it every time we spend time together…whether we do that or not. What's growing inside you now? Max, I think about…I remember crying in that car with you. I think about the what if…if we ran away together…kept it…where we would be. Letting you go…it was right…but I miss you. If you want to fight for your marriage, I'm not standing in your way, but this is our kid. I want to be its dad."

Kenny wants him cut out. It's the one thing he's said to me. That he doesn't want him in our life at all. "Okay."

"That's it?"

Why am I holding his hand? Looking at their interlocked fingers in the back booth, before back at him. "Is that all you want?"

He squeezed her hand tighter and smiled at her. "You want to save your marriage."

"I do."

"Then no. All I want is to co-parent with you. I hope he's worth it."

He is, she thought, I can fix this. "I need to get home. Oh, here, look."

He looked at the sonogram picture and broke into a grin at her again. "That's our baby."

She smiled back at him. "Keep it, I have another one. But yeah…she's tiny."

"She?"

"It feels like a girl."

He nodded. "Are you sure you have to go? Not that we should do…what we're really good at. I just want to talk."

Dangerous, she thought, this really is. "I have some time. Another round of coffee?"

Present – The Lacos House

"You cooked for me?" Max asked, watching him for a long moment.

Kenny turned to looked at his wife. Radiant, he thought, as she hung her bag up. Just looking at me…afraid and unsure. "I couldn't take the burned food anymore."

Max broke into a grin at that. "I think it's the stove."

"What's your excuse for the salt?"

"Uh, it's too salty for cooking."

"You make good coffee," he said, not taking his eyes off her. Can we? Can I really forgive her? "How are you feeling? I haven't heard you…throwing up."

She shook her head. "I think I'm done…time to get fat. I had a sonogram today. Jill said everything looks good."

"Can I see?"

She nodded, pulling it out of her bag. "Here."

Her baby, he thought, looking at it. This should be our kid…instead…she ruined us, and I can't leave her. How can I still love her? I've always loved her. "Max…this is…Can I go with you next time?"

"I'd really like that."

He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly to him. Feeling her stiffen briefly, she sunk into his strong arms. Max…can I do this? Raise this baby? Can I love it? It's a part of her. A part that'll remind me…she's had limited contact with him.

"Kenny?" she said softly. I need to tell him. He needs to hear it from me. Oh, this is nice. "Um, I had coffee with Lucas. He surprised me after my sonogram."

He pushed her back and just stared at her. "What?"

She wrapped her arms around herself, the closeness forgotten. "He wanted to…check in on me. Talk about…the baby. That's all."

"You couldn't do that on the phone?"

She winced at how cold he sounded toward her again. "He wants to be involved…and it's his right."

"Because you slept with him."

"I know."

"How long is he here?

"A few days…he wants to come back…be part of this. He wants to be here when I have her. We're going to talk to a lawyer, set up a custody agreement…He's not a bad person, despite…what we did."

"He knew you were married when you went to bed with him."

"He did. I knew it too. I made a mistake, Kenny, and hurting you is…I'll never forgive myself."

He crossed the room to her again, sweeping her up in his arms and kissing her hard on the mouth. Not again, Max, not with him. Sweeping her up in his arms, dinner forgotten, he carried her to their bedroom.

17 Years Ago – Max & Lucas

"Marry me."

Max nodded, kissing him in the darkness of her new car that her parents gave her for her birthday. "Yes. Always yes."

He brushed back her hair. "We can run away…We're going to be a family, Darlin."

"You've always been my family," she said softly. "I love you, Luc."

"I love you, Max," he smiled. "And our baby."

I'm going to be a mom, she thought, looking up at her love…I'm getting the family I always wanted.

Present- The Lacos House

Oh, wow, Max thought, lying next to him. Wow. That was…different. Great…but…was that him staking a claim? I'm usually not…he really…dominated me. Go with it…let him set the pace with us.

Kenny looked at his sweaty and naked wife. Mine, he thought, she is mine. "You ready to go again?"

"I don't think I can move."

He rolled on top of her, pinning her to bed. "You don't have to."

"I love you, Kenny."

He looked at her with that for a long moment. I love her too…I've loved her since I first met her. That feisty red head…she smiled at me and I was done. I thought she felt the same way…I never thought she would…I never thought I would we would, then we did, and…I love her. I just don't trust her. "I love you too, Max."

TBC