Yeah I know I based the last chapter after the cassette, not the book, but it was daytime and my family thinks they hid my book where I would never find it, so I based the chapter more on the audio cassette than the book…and Jade stalking Beck trying to get him? Didn't sound right to me…
Second disk in hand…what do I do? I know I NEED to listen to these Cd's…but it's getting really hard to. My eyes are really puffy, my throat is really dry, and I was crying so hard I'm silent right now, I can't even let out a soft groan; silent. I twirl the second disk once more…I need to play it, I need the answers…so why is it so hard to place the disk in the laptop and hit play? It takes me a minute to calm down, well not fully, but at least enough so I can hear what's on the second Cd…
-Scratch, Scratch -
Dang, I need to let the dog in; she's scratching at the door and whining…I better go upstairs while I'm at it, this way if anyone comes home, like I doubt they would, they won't see me crying…then again I'm "different" and they would have passed it off as me being Bipolar.
Okay I let the dog in; she's sleeping in the living room right now…I think. I'm in my room, door closed, lying on the bed with my laptop in front of me. I brought the box and map with me up here…the map! I forgot the map! I check it and B-1 is the first placed marked above the star is "Our first date" …should I go? Jade did say we were supposed to follow her...I'm going! I need to see what was so important. But the Cds…I need to hear them as well…
I placed them in my laptop, one-by-one, and ripped them in my music library, PearPod plugged in, the library syncs and now I have all the things I need so I can follow Jade on this little adventure. This is gonna be a day I can already tell. I glance at my clock 4:38, yup long afternoon ahead of me. I grab a light jacket, my keys, my PearPod, and the map, then head downstairs…Jade…where are you leading me?
I head to the park, I want to know what's there…but Jade didn't say much, something about a corner and a kiss. Wait, I remember Beck's bragging "Yeah under the big oak tree, she gave it willingly too"…dang it! Beck was bragging that Jade gave her virginity to him! No wonder she was pissed, but she wouldn't go that far on a first date…or do that in public…would she? No she wouldn't, I know Jade… I mean I knew Jade…hate saying that now. She would never do that, sure she wasn't 'innocent" but on a first date she'd hold back… so the big oak tree is where I need to go.
I look up and see my destination; the park. I see the swings, the playground, and the giant rocketship that little kids would play on, then the big oak tree; it's not like most of the trees, it's located near the tunnel and it's at the edge of the park. I head towards that, no need to go visit anything else…why is the park empty at this time? I only see 4 people here…and they are far from the tree, better this way I guess. The tunnel looks the same as it did when I first saw it, gray stones covered in moss and roots from it's neighbor; the tree. I'm standing underneath it and I'm wondering why I'm here…so this is the place that Beck and Jade had their first date. Standing here is causing me to feel…odd…like someone is watching me…Jade? Jade are you watching me? Making sure I'm following your rules, checking the places you mentioned, trying to understand you? Because I am, I need to understand everything; if I'm involved I need to understand, understand why, and understand how I caused your death…how I could have prevented it.
I place in my earbuds and turn on the PearPod, time for Cd two, and my next destination place….
-CLICK-
"Hey welcome back, now it's time for part two, oh who's featured in this little tale? You'll need to wait a minute for that answer. Now if you're listening to this, you're either Beck and you're listening for the name of the next person so you can ship these Cd's off…or you're waiting to hear you're name in this little shiny disk. …Well, André Harris; you're next."
-Pause-
André? What the heck? How is HE involved in Jade's death? I mean he never ridiculed her….at least I thought he never did! Looks like I never read between the line enough…
-Play-
"Oh André, you have no idea why you're on here do you? You did a good thing for me; right? I was voted, Best Ass in Sophomore Class, all thanks to you, that was a good thing; right? No, it was not, which causes you to be on this Cd.
André; you know me, well as much as I let anyone know me, you know I'm not one to rebel against the tiniest of things and take everything way too seriously. Now remember, you can stop listening at any time you want, sure I'll have those second set of Cds released to the public, but really; who cares what you thought of my ass? I can name a whole list of people who would care if these Cds got out into open hands, but it's really your choice André…so you're going to listen? Okay, let me start.
It was Sikowitz's class, I was sitting next to Beck and had my head on his shoulder; Sikowitz was out for whatever reason so it was a free period; different people did different things, but I remember seeing you. You were in the corner playing cards with Robbie, Cat and Tori were watching the game and yelling out 'Cheat!' every so often, I'm guessing Cat convinced Tori not to cuss during class…she always did have a problem with cussing, no tainted tongue for Cat.
-Pause-
Jade's right, I remember that day too. Sikowitz was visiting a relative in a different state so we were going to have a sub for a few days, which meant no Improve class for awhile. Sure actors need to learn, but a break was appreciated during the middle of school. I remember Robbie 'fighting' with his puppet; Rex, because Rex 'spilled' and told André that Robbie had cheated. A fight started and I was trying to stop it. Dang Rex and Robbie always 'fighting'.
Why do we even pretend the puppet is real? I never understood it but went along with it, well everyone but Jade pretended Rex was real, I should have followed her and shown everyone Rex was fake, but Robbie was my friend…well he sent me these tapes…he's involved too…can I call him my friend now? Can I call André my friend, what about Beck, hell, can I even say I was a friend to Jade? I mean it's my fault she's dead…but why did Jade mention me so early? 'No tainted tongue for Cat' so…does that mean it wasn't something I said that caused this, it was something I did instead? I need to hear more.
-Play-
"Something must have happened because I heard Robbie yelling at his little toy; Rex. Robbie must have made Rex 'say' something insulting because Robbie was pointing his finger at the puppet while Cat was in the middle, literally, trying to separate the boys from the 'fight'. Who knew cards would cause this much drama? Anyways the fight was continuing and I saw you, yes you; André, passing a note to Elli, he looked over at me; nodded and I heard him whisper quietly, but not quiet enough, 'You bet it is'. I was wondering what the not had said at the point but I didn't feel like going up to you and snatching the thing from you. Well somehow the note was passed all around the room and ended up in Beck's lap. Beck grabbed the note and held it to the side, so I couldn't read it; wrong, the light had shown me what was written 'Sophomore Class, Who's Hot/Who's Not'. This list was passed out in freshman year, only titled, 'Freshman Class' I knew that you perverted guys would write our names down and make others agree or disagree with who was better looking than the other opposite on them. Beck tried to pass the note to Sinjin, who was in front of us playing with his vibrating hairbrush, and I saw where my name was 'Best ass in Sophomore Class' and who was in the opposite list you ask; Tori Vega.
Okay everyone knows that most of that list is a lie, especially 'Worst Ass' that category was always wrong, so why was Tori in that side? Well the note ended up with Tori; she looked at it before you snatched it away from her, she glared at you, then at me. The truth is, and I'll admit this, Tori IS hotter than me, form her tan skin, to her shiny hair, to those beautiful expressive eyes, so why was I in the 'Hot' list when Tori deserved it? Oh because you needed revenge on Tori, I will not explain the reason here, but you did need to revenge, and I was the perfect choice. Tori and I, well we didn't kill each other, we were able to stand each other but were never really, friends; so using me was the perfect idea, wasn't it Andre? Also the perverted image that Beck had given me, that I did not know of at the time, even better reason for people to agree with you. Thank you for that Beck, if only I had known that at the time, and the snowball keeps a-rollin
Now this Cd isn't about the motivation, although that IS coming up, it's about"
I hear rustling; she must be flipping through a notebook or some kind of paper
"Okay I went over all the names, every story, and guess what? Every event I noted could have been avoided if you André had NOT added my name to that stupid list! It's like that, without that list there would have been no future problems.
You just needed your revenge so bad you HAD to add my name across from Tori's. Well thank you André for helping push this snowball down the hill.
-Pause-
She's right, everyone knew that the list was a joke; sure it was an awful joke, but André had NO idea it would affect Jade this much, was this fair? What about me? What have I done to Jade that caused her death, how did I scar her? Because I have no idea what I could have done…maybe she found out I had a crush on her, it could have been obvious, but I'm not sure. What do people even think of me now? I know 3 people already heard these tapes, maybe Robbie's is next, and then mine is after. What could Robbie done to her?
The second red star on the map; Jade's old house. Wait, this is familiar…I've been there before…there was a party, about a month ago. An elderly old man was on his way home, there was an accident, and he hit another car. The memories…my eyes are watering again, that night…he cried out 'My wife! I need to call her!' so I called her for him, her phone kept ringing, she was confused and wouldn't click over to my unknown number; he had called her and the line was still on; even after the phone was lost in the crash. She had a heart effect, and needed to know he was fine, he was gonna live, so I called the police. The old man begged me to go to his house and tell her in person, I looked over and saw a senior from or school was the driver of the other car, he was in bad shape, much worse than the old man, I shouted and begged someone to watch the old man, and I ran, I ran down the street to hurry and tell his wife he was fine…how did I know I was running to Jade's old house.
I remember another guy after Jade during that summer, a best friend of Beck…but he moved. If he had stayed, would Jade have fallen for him instead of Beck? Would Jade still be alive?
-Play-
"Okay so I survived the list, I knew it was a joke, the people walking through Hollywood Art's knew it was a joke, one big happy joke. But when you're added to a list like that, people get the wrong idea, they notice things…they notice that one area the most, go to B-3 for that example; Red Quarry Liquor.
I have no idea why they named the place that, but it was only a block away form my first house and I would walk there when I wanted something sweet…which was everyday. Yes I actually had a sweet tooth; I just hid that from you guys."
Not me Jade, I knew about our sweet tooth, I remember you coming to my house and eating 3 red velvet cupcakes, then denying you liked them, only for me to get the truth from you; you lvoed sugar.
"Long story short, some idiot, who will remain nameless, decided I was an easy target and slapped me right across the ass. 'This right here; voted Best Ass in Sophomore Class' is what he said to the owner, and for the first time I heard him grunt. Now when ever I went there the owner was silent, never talked and always rang me up before I even got to the register. Now hearing him grunt I knew he was pissed, and so was I. Did it hurt? Nope, I've felt worse, but did he, the idiot, have the right to do that? Nope. But the list gave him the impression he did. I told him to step aside so I could leave, door was right in front of me, all I had to do was get away from this creep, then he grabbed my wrist pulled into him and whispered my name; 'Jade'. I knew the joking was over when he tightens his grip; 'I'm only playing' Jade' is what he said to me, grip still vice-like. 'Only playing' that translated to 'your ass is mine and it's my play-toy, you have no control over it as long as I'm playing'. Okay now the actions were awful, I didn't need, or want to be grabbed at my ass that day, and why would he have a reason to? I didn't wear anything tight, nothing too low, nothing to 'out there', so why did he need to? Sure my pants were maybe a little low, a hip shot or two, but he didn't go for my hips, we went for another place.
André, I'm not saying your list gave him permission to grab me, just an excuse. I know the world is full of sick people, hell; I'm one of them after I end everything, but when you embarrass people, you have to learn to be responsible. But wait; you voted me 'Hot' so it wasn't me you embarrassed, it was Tori…and that's where our next Cd heads to.
Tori, princess; you're up"
-Click-
Tori's next…I'm still safe, she needs to say something about Robbie, he's the one who had this box before me, so I'm safe for maybe 2 more Cds. Jade said to head to red Quarry, but it's closed for renovation, I don't want to stay here; under the big Oak tree…and I don't want to head to Jade's old house…maybe I'll walk by Red Quarry, it's not too far from here and I'm sure Jade would mention a new place to head to before I even get there. These cds are getting deeper…poor Andre, knowing this is his fault, he must be a wreak, next time I see him I better take note of it, and Beck, Tori, and Robbie as well; they will probably take note of my condition too, see if I'm still hanging after I hear what I did to Jade, how I'm a part of this mess…