Author's Note: Thank you all so much for reading! This is my first story on FanFiction, so I'm so sorry if it is absolutely terrible (it probably is). Also, to all you fans of Will, he will be making an appearance in this chapter, so stay tuned! Now, without further ado, here is Chapter 2...

Chapter 2

"Tessa, you shouldn't have been that harsh to Jem," Charlotte criticizes.

After that big argument, class was a little awkward. Jem was noticeably not paying attention to class. I could feel him staring at me the entire class, but I never found the strength to look at him and at least smile. Everyone was distracted in class, or maybe that was just me. But from my view, even the teacher, Mr. Lightwood, could sense the tension between Jem and I. And after class, Charlotte approached me and we started walking to lunch. Maybe I was a little mean, but he deserved it. After what he did to me...

"Maybe not, but he did deserve it, Char," I respond.

"Tessa, you can't blame him for something if he doesn't even know what it is. I'll admit, he is partially to blame, but it really isn't his fault."

"Can we just not talk about this Char?" I start. "I really don't want to think about this right now."

"Fine." Charlotte replies. "But just so you know, you can always talk to me about anything, especially about Jem."

"Okay, Char. But, in case you forgot, we need to discuss Henry more."

Charlotte becomes very excited at the mention of Henry, and she starts talking my ear off about how amazing Henry is, how he always makes her laugh, how during math he flirts with her, how he makes her happy...

And I start thinking of someone I know who used to me feel even better than this. Someone I loved more than life itself. But I guess that's not saying much, considering I would trade lives with anyone in a heartbeat.

My mind, though, starts to wander to a different place. And although I try to fight it, as my best friend is telling me about her happiness, I can't. I can't hear about her good memories when all I have are bad ones. Even those beautiful memories are tarnished with the stain of silver now. I can't imagine another's happiness now, for if everyone else can find happiness in this messed up world, then maybe it's not so messed up. Maybe I'm the one that's messed up.

"You know you don't have to do that" I heard a silky voice whisper.

"What?" I questioned, confused about what I was doing was doing wrong.

"The effort you are putting into that Short Answer Question" he replied. "He never reads these anyway, so why bother trying?" Of course, someone has to call me out on every little thing I do. I can't even write a sentence without someone critiquing me.

Since sarcasm was my friend, I answered, "Well, that's exactly the kind of mindset I like to have, Mr. ..."

"Carstairs." he replied. "James Carstairs."

"Wait... I'm talking to James Carstairs? THE James Carstairs?"

"So you've heard of me," he confirmed.

"No," I responded as casually as possible. "Although if I were you, I would reccomend a nickname. Everyone at this school is named James. Maybe something like Cary, or Jimmy, or-"

"Jem," he said, obnoxiously interrupting me. "The name's Jem."

"Well, great first impression you're making Mr. James 'wait it's actually Jem' Carstairs," I replied, trying desperately not falling for his charm. He was definitely charming. A smooth-talker, joking all day long, he was exactly my type. And, although he was definitely not standard on the hotness scale, with both silvery eyes and silvery hair, he was absolutely beautiful.

"So are you, Ms. Theresa Gray," he whispered huskily.

"Oh, am I really that famous?" I asked, actually confused for once.

"Well, no." He said. "But your paper there says 'Theresa Gray', so I figured that's probably your name."

"Always a charmer, it seems," I spoke, mostly to myself. "Please call me Tessa, though."

"Noted, Ms. Gray," he started. "So, how would you like to go to the library with me after school. You know, so I can teach you how to properly BS your way through AP Euro?"

"You are absolutely bonkers," I said as quickly as possible. "I'm already a pro at BS-ing, so if you just want to spend time with me, you're going to have to come up with a better excuse than that." Arrogant? Maybe so. But when responding to a fuckboy, one needs to maintain confidence and poise.

"Fine," he replied, faking annoyance. "Would you like to 'hang out' with me?"

"Nope," I replied just as the bell rang. And then I left him sitting there, in that desk, with a stunned look on his face. "Bet you're not used to that, are you Mr. Carstairs," I called after him.

That memory courses through my head as though it were the alphabet. I didn't even realize how many memories I had of Jem. And in that same moment, I also don't realize where I'm walking, until I feel my nose bang into someone's upper chest. And, of couse, with my luck, my nose starts bleeding all over his shirt.

"Shit," I whisper. "Sorry, I probably should have been watching where I was going."

"Don't worry, no one's dead, so it's all good," a voice I have never heard before replies.

I can't bear to look up, trying to hide my face to postpone embarrassment as much as possible. And in response, my depressed brain says "Yet..."

"What?" the man asks, clearly confused by my darkness.

" 'No one's dead yet.' She's just a little crazy, and, well, she's Tessa," Charlotte responds. Is it bad that I forgot she was standing next to me?

"Well, Tessa, we should probably get you to the nurse," he said. "I'll go with you, since I have a bit of blood on my shirt."

"Oh, um, okay," I reply, confused about what's going on. "Bye, Char."

The whole walk, I hide my face from this mysterious stranger, which is easier to do since I'm trying to stop my nose from bleeding. Even though he learned my name, he didn't know my face yet, so maybe I could manage to save my reputation. Unfortunately for a girl like me, image matters so much more than it should. Even though I barely care about anything, the one thing that always seems to stop me from doing anything notable is my fear of being viewed as lesser. Maybe the reason I've kept holding back on suicide is my fear of what others will think of me. Am I really that concerned with my appearance that I can't bear for anyone to view me as weak?

"You don't happen to have HIV, right?" the man asks.

"Why?" I answer, confused at the relevance of this question.

"Well, you got some blood on my shirt, and I might have a cut on that spot, and I'm pretty sure blood can travel that way."

"Are you sure you don't just want to know if I'm a virgin?" I asked, not wanting to reveal this information about myself.

"Well, I am curious about that too. A pretty girl like you must have had a boyfriend or two."

"Yes on the boyfriend," I start. "But no on the pretty girl. And if you knew me better, you would be shocked I've even had a boyfriend..."

"Don't change the topic on me!" he cries. "Although I will get back to that later. But are we a yes or know on the HIV?"

Um..." I start, unsure how to say this. "Probably not... I don't know, I never really checked after..."

"Really?" he asks, his face confused. "You don't seem like the type of girl that would not know."

"Well, what can I say? I wanted to block that memory from my mind."

"Bad breakup?"

"Is there such thing as a good one?"

"Good point, Tessa." Shit he remembered my name.

"Why thank you..." I begin, unsure of his name.

"Will. Nice to meet you," He says, extending his arm.

"I wish I could say the same, but considering I just throughly embarrassed myself in front of you..." While I'm speaking, I look at him for the first time in this entire conversation. And my gosh, he is hot. He has jet-black hair with pale skin in contrast. Mixed with a muscular face and a great body, he's every girl's dream. But that's not the shocking thing about him. His eyes. His eyes are unlike anything I have ever seen before. Their color is indescribable, so deep and blue that I could spend all day looking at them and still not believe they existed. Oh, how I want to just look at him all day, and stroke his hair, and just stare into his eyes... But there's one problem with him, which is the problem I find with every guy I find attractive: he is a total fuckboy.

My face must have shown my thoughts, because, unfortunately for me, his response makes me wish I never met him. He wiggles his eyebrows with a big smirk on his face, and replies, "Do you want to go somewhere a little more private?"

The embarrassing thing, though, isn't that he suggested this. It's that I want to say yes. But I can't give him that satisfaction, so I reply, "Wow, you're willing to risk HIV for a silly little hook-up?"

In response, he leans closer to me, his mouth as my neck, his breath tracing down my back, and huskily whispers, "Who said this was just a hook-up?"

I shiver slightly, unable to control my body's response to him. And I realize that my nose has stopped bleeding. Trying to regain my focus, though, I stutter "Wh-who are you ag-again?"

"William Herondale, but I go by Will. I used to live here a couple years ago, but I moved to Wales a few years ago. I just got back here last week."

"Shit," I breathe. How could I not see it earlier?

"Is that a problem?" he asks. "I can't really change my identity, if it is. But I would still like to get to know you better if you're free on-"

"You're Jem's best friend," I confirm with him. "The one he was best friends with before you moved to Wales, the one that he tells everything."

"Yes, but I don't really see how that's relevant to what I was about to ask you." he says, clearly a little annoyed. "Why, do you know him?"

"Yeah, you could say that. We aren't exactly on the best of terms right now, though." My mind is realing. I can't fathom the idea of Jem knowing that I met Will. "Just don't tell him that we met."

"Why, is something wrong?" he asked, his confusion evident. And as Will says those words, I see a speck of silver out of the corner of my eye.

"I have to go," I mutter, as I run off to find Charlotte and eat my lunch, trying to escape my ever present-past, and hoping to get away before it catches me.

Author's Note: Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, as I certainly enjoyed writing it. Why did Tessa leave so quickly? What is wrong with her knowing Will? What past is she referring to? What will happen when Tessa sees Jem again? All this (and more) will be revealed in the next chapter (Along with more glimpses into Tessa's dark mind)!