A/N : Before we proceed with the story, this is in response to the requests I have been receiving for the future chapters.
I am sorry, I cannot write on Dareya. No offence to their shipping or their fans, really, but it just won't go with the theme. I don't understand what and how do you want me to portray as a "one-sided love which remains incomplete" in their case, when you yourself will slaughter me if either Daya or Shreya ends up with someone else. So, no Dareya from me.
Furthermore, I cannot write on PurVin or RajVi, because I have already written one chapter on Purvi, and I wouldn't want it to be repetitive in her case.
In response to several other requests (Sachin, Nyla..), I will think about them and try writing as and when I get ideas.
Coming to the chapter, those who are against Sudhakar and Asha's pair can happily skip this.
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It had started snowing by the time he walked out of the clinic. Opening the umbrella with one hand and balancing his crutch with the other, he scuffled his way through the snow-covered roads.
The weather had been particularly windy that day, the breeze lashing on every possible surface it could find, and people struggled to keep their umbrellas and winter clothes in place. However, for him, there was something else biting him more than the cold.
Harsher and tumultuous than he could imagine.
As he cast a glance around him, he could find people merrily chatting with each other, some snuggling close for warmth, some merely enjoying the snow, while carrying their infant in a crib, hurrying to reach towards their destination. However they were, they had some purpose, some solace in their life. Someone they could talk to, someone who listened to them.
Struggling to maintain his balance on the slippery ground, he tried recollecting the last time someone had actually spoken to him. Or rather, listened to him. Enquiring about him, his injuries. About his loneliness.
Chuckling slightly to himself, he thought there is nothing anyone could do, anyways. His leg injury had gone worse since the encounter, and when they had tried every possible way of treatment they could, they had decided to send him off to this place far away, for a hope of a better recovery. Far off from his life, his family... his duty of serving the country.
It had helped, nonetheless. He had experienced a speedy recovery in his leg, and within months, he had moved from a wheelchair to crutches.
When they – particularly ACP Pradyuman and Freddy – had learned about the progress, they had sounded happy, at least over the phone. Although they kept on repeating they missed him, he was still unable to figure out whether they wanted him back in the team.
He recollected the times he had spent with them and he missed every single bit of it all. Right from going to places for investigation, searching for hidden clues, the light moments they shared in the bureau, the secrets he kept with Freddy to the small brawl he had had with Abhijeet over a case. More than that, he missed his title – Sub Inspector Sudhakar. The mere thought of the label sent a wave of warmth through him, in the freezing cold.
But, more than anything, he missed her. Not her smile, her hair or her beauty. Because that was just not her. Though everyone knew she was way too different from the rest of the girls, he found something. Something that distinguished her from the normal generalization of women.
He missed her eyes. Those intimidating, intriguing eyes. He missed her anger. Her love, her passion for work. Yes, he missed the way she used to lose herself in whatever she did.
And he knew nothing else was more important to her. Nothing else would be. And he understood. He respected it. He always would. Until the very end.
Pondering over her thoughts, he didn't even realize he had reached home. Where no one and nothing would be waiting for him. Only sheer, cruel loneliness.
Sighing heavily, he pulled out the keys, proceeding to enter into the world of isolation. No sooner had he taken a few steps ahead, when he saw a big chunk of what looked like furry white snow outside the door, huddled in a corner. Taking his crutch, he reached over to shove it off to a side, when, to his utter surprise, he found it slightly moving. Rather, shivering.
Bending down to get a clear picture, he scrutinized it for a few seconds, until he realized what the thing in question was. Surprised as he was, he looked around for any signs if anyone had forgotten it by mistake. There wasn't a single creature for miles away.
Putting all the strength he had, he sat down on his uninjured leg, and gently moved his hand over the thing. "Hey there, boy!" He called out softly, and slowly, a pair of blackish-red eyes shot back at him. It was a snowy-white hare, with big expressive eyes and long ears. Smiling gently at the animal, he guessed it must have escaped from a nearby zoo.
He took one good look at it, and being the experienced CID officer that he was, he knew it was starving and homeless. "Come, let's give you something to eat." He caressed and carefully picked up the shivering rabbit who cuddled closer under his warm coat, as he bit his lip to ignore the pain which shot up in his leg while getting to his feet.
Needless to say, the rabbit gobbled up whatever it was being served within minutes, its huge ears straightening up as a gesture to express relief. Seeing it eat satisfactorily was indeed a pleasure for Sudhakar. He felt as though he had helped a needy after ages. And it felt good. He smiled affectionately at the hare, who had by then finished up the treat, and was licking its paws clean.
Watching over it as it hopped to a corner, he wondered what needed to be done about it. He did not want to give it away to a zoo or an animal welfare association. For some unknown reason, he felt a need, a companionship in the creature in those few minutes he had spent with it. Anyways, he needed someone to talk to, he thought. He had heard and seen cats and dogs being good listeners. He couldn't say the same about hares.
At least, I'll have someone to talk to in this cavern of loneliness, he thought.
And as though the animal had read his mind, it came hopping up to his feet, straightening its ears indicating its interest in listening. Chuckling in amusement, the sub-inspector lifted the hare up, who was looking at him earnestly.
"I don't remember the last time I poured my heart out to someone and got anything in return!" He gave a deep sigh, and the rabbit surprisingly placed a paw over his chest. Sudhakar patted the animal's head lovingly, caressing behind its ears before letting himself drown into his world of nostalgia.
"So, it all started when I got this fatal injury in this nearly life-threatening encounter. One bullet.. one damn bullet.. was enough to change my entire life. Turn it upside down!" He grimaced slightly, as the horrifying incident swam in front of his eyes.
He felt relieved the next instant when the hare again placed its paw on his chest, as though it sensed his pain. He gently rubbed the animal's neck, and it blinked in joy. Taking a few deep breaths, he continued. "It started getting worse gradually. Doctors had even offered to amputate my leg. But ACP Sir and Freddy strongly protested, because they knew they were other options. And... that is how I landed here!" He sighed, smiling at his newly found companion, who looked back at him before staring at his legs, trying to figure out if it still hurt him.
"Aah, it's alright now! I've got some really good treatment, you know. So, it's much better now!" He assured the animal. The little creature was too innocent to know anything as unpleasant as bullets and injuries.
His voice suddenly cracked as he continued further. "But, the worst part was, that one bullet made me lose everything. My job, my friends, my chance to serve my country, my..." He stopped, feeling a sharp needle being pierced right through his heart as he remembered her again.
"But, what was worse was, I lost... her! Never to see her again!" He stared distantly into the empty space, trying to figure out what exactly was it about her that made him miss her so much. So damn much.
Jerking out of the trance, he found the hare staring at him, its eyes fixed on him, waiting for him to reveal the deepest secret locked safely in his heart. To which he never allowed anyone access. Not even Freddy. For a moment, he shuddered imagining Freddy's scandalized reaction, had he learned about his secret.
Sudhakar opened his mouth to finally spill his heart out, but closed it abruptly. He couldn't understand where and how to start. He was at a loss of words... for her.
He found himself unable to make out what to say. He found himself with the urge to speak nothing and everything about her. For a second, he frowned thinking what exactly was he supposed to say? About the first time he got this nagging feeling in his heart about her? About how he was unsure of his true feelings for her? Or about the mixed emotions he had on managing to hide his feelings from her?
He slightly winced, as he pulled himself away from the past, as soon as he realized there was someone waiting to listen to him. "There was this girl..." He murmured, and the hare suddenly became interested.
"There was something... something about her which made her stand out in the crowd. Which made her... different. Very different from the rest." He said absently, before turning to his pal and sneering at him. "Don't be so surprised! These things can happen to us... to everyone." He smiled, as he felt the animal's expressions suddenly changing.
"I don't know what was more fascinating about her. Whether the way she used to look at everyone with those stern eyes... or whether she used to care about everyone like a mother. Or whether she was so passionate, so dedicated towards her duty." As he spoke, he found himself wondering what was actually so fascinating, so intriguing about her.
After a few seconds of his mind playing the topsy-turvy game with him, he finally reached at a conclusion. "Whatever it was, I found everything... literally every damn thing about her attractive. Mesmerizing!" He rested his head on the sofa, momentarily closing his eyes to quell the piercing feeling which was stabbing at his heart.
Once the feeling had simmered down, he straightened up and looked at his friend. "Girls can do really bad things to you, you know! Many a times, you just look once at them, and your entire life is likely to go for a toss. That is the intensity in them. In everything they do." He sighed and ruffled the animal's fur. "Never, never ever fall for a girl. It's very bad for you! Plus, the passion you develop for her, can make it very inconvenient for you." He snorted softly, but stopped as he saw a somewhat vexed expression on its tiny face.
"Alright, sorry for that! But, yeah... it's the truth!" He nodded vigorously to emphasize his point.
Pulling the hare closer to his chest, he ploughed on. "You know, she used to be a pretty strict lady sometimes. Once she decided for what she felt was right, no one dared to stop her. Not even our ACP Sir." He said, remembering the way she had stood up by her friend's side against domestic violence.
"In fact, my friend Freddy used to be terrified of her sometimes. Particularly when she used to be in that typical 'mood' of hers. Gosh, even that used to be something!" He shook his head, still in partial denial about he actually fell of every single thing of hers. "Ohh, Freddy was my best friend back then, by the way. And like you, he always used to listen to me whenever I needed someone to talk to!" He added.
"Anyways, getting back to her, the best thing about her was she wasn't like all the other girls. She never had that girly cheesiness in her. Constantly being self-conscious, doing all those girly things... all of that was never known to her. Yet, the attitude in her, those plain, simple yet appealing looks made her the most beautiful lady ever!" He said in a dazed voice, gazing remotely in space.
He recollected the way she used to be passionate about getting things done, and the utmost perfection with which she used to do them. The way she was never afraid to challenge her seniors whenever they used to go wrong. The way she used to empathize with her juniors whenever they used to work beyond their capacity. Ok, enough... he thought, pulling himself up yet again.
"So... that was it about her! But you know the funniest part?" He looked at the animal, who blinked in confusion. "After all this, I still don't know why and how did I fall for her in the first place!" He snorted at his own thoughts, still unable to decide why he missed her to such an extent.
"And I never want to know. For I know she is happy with what she has. With something which gives her much more love than I would have, if I could!" He sighed with an unknown satisfaction, and added hastily. "No, it's not any other guy!" He reassured. "It's her work. Her passion, her love for her duty. She has loved no one and nothing more than her work! And she will never do! I will always be happy for that. Always! Until the very end!" He finished. With that, he felt greatly relieved, as though a heavy boulder was being lifted off his body, with his feelings spilling out from the confines of his heart. Finally.
For the first time since he had arrived at this place, for the first in all those months, he laughed as he felt the rabbit's hand over his face. As though telling him it was willing to listen to him for the rest of its life. He laughed wholeheartedly and unconditionally. A feeling which he was dying to experience.
"By the way, how do you like 'Fred' for a name?" He smiled, and sure enough, the hare's ears sprang up in happiness.
Grinning enthusiastically that night, Sudhakar carried his companion in one hand, and scrambling to his feet, limped towards the bedroom. "Come little boy, that's enough for today. Time to go to bed!"
He had finally found a companion, a friend. Someone he had always longed for.
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A/N : I know, it has less of Sudhakar's feelings for Asha, and more of his loneliness and his much-needed companionship. But, I couldn't think of anything more than this, and I don't know how much of it is relevant.
PR, thanks for the idea. :-) Although this is not exactly as you had suggested, I hope it's not disappointing either. Also, I hope I have done justice to Sudhakar's character.
People, don't review if you don't like.