Hermione laid completely still as Healer Norton performed the usual health checks. Part of the agreement with her assignment was monthly healer appointments to ensure the magical force held within the cave wasn't affecting her physically nor magically. Luckily for Hermione, her department and the Aurors shared an on-hand Healer situated within the Ministry for total discretion and ease of access.
The well-practiced routine had Hermione relaxing for the first time that week as her mind drifted to Draco. She was still overwhelmed by his attentiveness over the weekend. Hermione had attended plenty of Weasley gatherings over the years, both with and without Ron, but Draco's presence had been a reassurance when she was feeling so out of balance.
Draco seemed to understand her in a way no one else did: he didn't push her into talking when she didn't want to, and he knew what she needed when she didn't. Hermione felt wrong for comparing Ron to Draco, but it was unavoidable. Time and time again, Ron had put his wants and needs ahead of her own making her feel unimportant in their marriage.
A quiet cough brought Hermione back to the present. Sitting up slowly, she watched as Healer Norton walked back to her desk and gestured for Hermione to join her.
Butterflies filled Hermione's stomach as she sat waiting before the Healer. One word and her assignment could be over. She loved living in the cave - it was her space. Not that she didn't love living with Ron, but staying in their marital home whilst he was on assignment accentuated the distance between them, making it that much harder to adjust when he was home. Fidgeting with the hem of her cardigan, Hermione looked up as Healer Norton rifled through her paperwork.
"Well then, Hermione," Healer Norton began happily, her tone allowing Hermione to relax slightly. "All of your vitals are fine. Your liver and kidneys are functioning perfectly, your heartbeat is strong and your brainwaves are as normal as ever. In addition to that, the power stored within your magical core has increased again. Have you noticed any increase in the power of your spells?"
Hermione shifted in the stiff wooden seat, attempting to make herself more comfortable as she pondered Healer Norton's question. "I do seem to be more proficient in wandless and non-verbal magic at home, but I put that down to the change in circumstances and feeling more relaxed," Hermione began timidly. Saying it out loud made it seem more curious. "I also seem to have a stronger sense of the magic within the cave. I can recognize when I'm near the wards and who exactly is trying to gain entry."
"How interesting," Healer Norton replied, scribbling across her notes before looking back up to study Hermione. "There was something else that appeared during your checkup."
"Yes?" Hermione questioned, her voice shooting up an octave as alarm bells went off in her mind just as Healer Norton appeared to shift in discomfort.
"Forgive me for being blunt, this isn't my area of expertise," Healer Norton began apologetically. "The scan showed you are pregnant…"
Blood thundered in Hermione's ears, drowning out the rest of the Healer's words. Every muscle in her body tensed up, ready for flight as the word 'pregnant' drummed in her mind with every beat of her heart. After a few moments of panic, logic pushed itself to the front of Hermione's mind. She should have seen this coming. She had tried, once, for a baby with Ron, but then he had left for his most recent mission. She struggled to believe once was all it took.
Yes, she had come off the potion, and yes, they had tried, but this was much too soon. Wasn't your body supposed to take time to adjust to not having the potion? Weren't you supposed to sit and calculate your most fertile days? Hermione had known the minute Ron had fallen asleep that night that she wasn't ready for any of this. She had calmed herself with the thought that she could explain to Ron, again, why she wasn't ready, but that hope had apparently been in vain.
"Thank you," Hermione mumbled as Healer Norton looked at her expectantly. "I should, umm, get back to work."
"Miss Granger," Healer Norton called as Hermione made to leave the office. "You know this will go in your record. Please make sure to follow up with your regular Healer.
Hermione nodded numbly and forced a weak smile on her face before turning and walking on unsteady legs back toward her office. Passing quickly by the Auror office, she kept her head down, keen to avoid bumping into anyone. She could feel her earlier panic bubbling away in the pit of her stomach as she turned the corner, taking the longer route back to her office. She was going to have a baby…
"Hey, Granger," Draco greeted lightly as Hermione's shoulder collided with his own. When she didn't immediately acknowledge him, he spoke again. "Earth to Granger, anybody home?" Draco joked, waving his hand in front of Hermione's face.
"Dr-Draco?" Hermione questioned confused, her mind still repeating the word 'pregnant' as she stared into his eyes, eyes which had seen her at her best and worst, eyes which had seen her naked not so long ago, eyes that - "DRACO!" Hermione all but shouted in the quiet corridor as her two trains of thought collided.
"Oh, gods," Hermione moaned as she drew in short sharp gasps. She stumbled backward out of Draco's reach and turned around to run. Chest heaving, she flew down corridor after corridor, not noticing the tears as they streamed down her face, the feeling of her muscles burning taking her back to those horrid memories of fleeing through the Forest of Dean away from the Snatchers.
Hermione threw herself around the next corner, pausing briefly before her eyes landed on a hidden alcove. Her heart constricting tightly in her chest, she dashed down the quiet corridor and sunk to the ground, her legs trembling. No, no, no, no, no, Hermione thought, her hands reaching up to pull on her curls as her body quaked with the force of her sobs. I can't be...not now...not after everything.
Back in the main corridor, Draco watched as Hermione vanished around the corner, his brows drawn in confusion. What the hell was that about? Sending his papers back to his office, Draco jogged through the hallways searching for a sign of Hermione, pausing when a stifled cry alerted him to her hiding place. He moved forward, his heart stopping when he found her crumpled on the floor.
"Hermione! Hermione, what's wrong?" Draco questioned frantically as his shaking hands tried to remove Hermione's clenched ones from her hair.
"Please, Hermione," Draco pleaded, mildly relieved when her mouth opened to speak.
"I...NO...can't be…" Hermione muttered wildly, ignoring Draco as he began checking her for any signs of injury.
Confusion turned to concern as Draco gave up on his battle with her hands, deciding instead to try to get her to look at him. "Hermione," he whispered, placing a gentle hand against her cheek to wipe away her tears. "Please speak to me, you're scaring me," Draco confessed quietly, gazing into her eyes.
A deep, shuddering breath escaped Hermione's lips. Looking up into Draco's glistening silver eyes, she snapped back to reality, her back crashing into the stone wall behind her as she pushed away suddenly.
Her mind filled with images of Draco, he was always there. It was Draco who pulled her back from the brink of her panic attacks. It was Draco who consoled her when Ron was an arse and it was Draco who had been there for her everyday during her separation from Ron. Hermione's mind fumbled to a stop and rested on that one image of Draco bathed in the strange blue light of the cave that she had tried to forget.
"No, no, no, no," Hermione mumbled shooting to her feet as Draco rocked backward. All she could do was panic. The sensation overwhelmed her, crushing any rational thought as Hermione ran, thinking only of home. She whipped through the crowded corridors, ignoring the curious glances of the people she passed by as the beating of her heeled boots echoed around her.
Looking up from his spot on the floor, Draco started to ask, "Granger, wha-" as he brushed the dust from his trousers, his hands freezing when he glanced around and realised he was alone.
Troubled by Hermione's erratic behaviour, Draco headed to her office, only stopping when Penelope Clearwater called out to him. "Have you seen Hermione, Mr Malfoy? The meeting started ten minutes ago."
Realising Penelope was watching him intently, Draco recalled the fact that she took great interest in his friendship with Hermione and did his best not to look confused by her question. He knew Hermione would never purposefully skip out on a meeting, especially not one with Potter. Judging by her earlier reactions, something had happened, and that thought unsettled him more than anything. Draco briefly wondered if something had happened to Ron. He knew the Ministry still had the Aurors out hunting for the remaining few Death Eaters. What if one had got the better of the newly-trained Auror? "Unfortunately, she is feeling unwell and has headed home," Draco answered easily, his fingers twitching at his lie. "Is there anything urgent I can take back for her?"
"No, Mr Malfoy, thank you for the offer," Penelope simpered, making Draco's skin crawl. "I'll let Mr Potter know she won't be attending the meeting."
Draco nodded and pushed past her, continuing to Hermione's office. As he entered, he noticed her desk was in order. Her quills were lined up neatly alongside her inkwells, her in-tray was clear and the out-tray was stacked with organised paperwork - nothing out of the ordinary. Furrowing his brows, Draco grabbed Hermione's coat and bag, exiting quickly. Something had seriously upset Hermione, and he'd be damned if he let her suffer on her own. Strolling out of the Ministry, Draco popped into the closest grocery store and grabbed some essentials for dinner - knowing Hermione, she probably hadn't been shopping since before she had fallen ill over the weekend.
Ten minutes later, Draco paused as he walked into the cave, listening intently for signs of Hermione's whereabouts. Sure that she was here somewhere, Draco moved through the cave, dropping the groceries in the kitchen as he went. Usually, Draco took the time to appreciate Hermione's cave. She had created - with a dedicated team from the Ministry - a beautiful home, without damaging the sanctity of the cave. Today, however, Draco wanted to see his witch.
Anxiously running his fingers through his hair, Draco headed back to the bedroom, knocking lightly before he pushed the door open. Through the gloom, Draco could see Hermione's small frame in the center of the bed. He walked in slowly, listening as Hermione tried to calm her tears, her deep shaky breaths disrupted by the occasional sniffle.
"Hermione," Draco called softly as he slowly walked forwards, careful not to surprise her again. "Hermione, it's me."
When Hermione didn't acknowledge him, Draco continued, unsure. "I can leave, if you want?" he questioned, hoping she wouldn't send him away.
Bottom lip trembling, Hermione shook her head and wrapped her arms around her legs tighter, trying to hold herself together. She didn't want Draco to leave, but she was terrified she would tell him...tell him everything, and that wasn't fair to him nor Ron.
Worried as Hermione bit down hard on her lip, Draco quickly kicked his shoes off and slid onto the bed just in front her, cradling her body against his as she shook against him.
Why did he have to be so damn nice? Hermione thought, her body betraying her thoughts as she relaxed into his arms. Hermione cursed Draco, cursed him for being so damn lovely and making her head a jumbled mess. Most of all, Hermione cursed him for knowing her too damn well. His muscular arms had molded her against his chest and Hermione hated it. She hated the way it made her feel safe, hated the way she wanted to stay here forever, hated the way it felt right.
In that moment, Hermione hated herself. All she wanted to do was confide in Draco, the words weighing heavily on her tongue as his hand moved against the small of her back. Pursing her lips together tightly, Hermione reminded herself - for what felt like the millionth time - that she had to tell Ron first, her husband Ron. It was the right thing to do, but oh how she longed to be reckless just this once.
Attempting to distract herself, Hermione focused on the movement of his hand rubbing her arm, the soft pads of his fingertips felt smooth against the gooseflesh that had erupted over her skin. Draco had changed a lot since the war, as had everyone else who had gone through that experience, but after all the cases they had worked on together and the way their friendship had developed from there, she knew she relied on him too much for comfort. She felt safe and secure here in his arms, and after everything he had shared with her, Hermione knew she could trust him. A few months into their friendship, Draco had confessed to Hermione that following his stint in Azkaban, he had spent a full year in intensive therapy, coming to terms with what he had lived through and learning how to live in this post-war world.
Draco too was lost in his own thoughts. He hadn't been this close to Hermione since that night nearly six weeks ago. His body remembered, even if he was trying to ignore the fruity smell of her hair and the way her head rested perfectly over his heart. The way she had looked that night still made Draco's heart pound. Laid beneath him in the sand as the water nipped at his feet, surrounded by the strange blue light from the glow worms on the cave ceiling - radiant was the only word for it. Her chocolate-coloured eyes had been locked on his own stony silver as they'd moved together, climbing higher and higher.
Draco wasn't sure how long he had drifted off into his fantasy, Hermione still snuffling against him as he replayed images from that night on a loop. In an attempt to bring himself back down to earth, Draco thought about his next business meeting with Theo, mentally organizing his main points for their upcoming proposal to the Board.
A few hours later when Hermione's breathing had returned to normal and she'd stopped sniffling, Draco tried to coax her from the bed, partially due to the fact that his left arm had gone numb from where Hermione had laid on it, her head either resting against his chest or shoulder. "Shall I cook some dinner?"
"Mmmm," Hermione replied croakily, "yes, please." Draco held her tightly against him one last time before freeing his arm and easing off the bed to saunter off into the kitchen.
Hermione sighed and stretched out on her bed. What the hell was she going to do? Just as her brain was about to go into overdrive with all of the possibilities, Draco summoned her for dinner. Standing stiffly, Hermione straightened out her work blouse, pulling at the collar where it had gone awry before twisting her trousers back to settle at her hips.
Dinner was a quiet affair. Draco had prepared her favourite meal - linguine with edamame pesto - and she ate in silence. The thoughts she had succeeded in ignoring earlier were now buzzing around her mind, demanding attention, and Hermione was thankful for Draco's company. She didn't enjoy eating alone, and he didn't feel the need to fill every moment with conversation.
Could the scan have been wrong? Hermione thought as she gazed out at the waterfall. No one was really sure what effects the cave would have on her body, and people got false positive tests all the time. Hanging onto that thought, Hermione forced herself not to panic and decided to call her muggle doctor in the morning to make an appointment. Of course, she was still going to have to talk to Ron and Draco.
Realising that sleep would not come easily tonight, Hermione looked up at the blond man before her. He was sitting opposite her, casually reading as he ate. Butterflies danced in her stomach as Hermione pondered her question. Can I really ask Draco to stay the night?
It had all begun during Ron's first Auror mission. He'd been away for over a month with no contact, and Draco had the impeccable timing to walk into Hermione's office when she was in the middle of a panic attack. The image of Harry, dead in Hagrid's arm, had flashed before her eyes, making Hermione stand suddenly from her desk. She found her back against the wall as her heart constricted. With shaking legs, she slid to the floor, failing miserably to pull herself back together. They're just nightmares, she kept telling herself over and over as her mind attacked her with the same image, over and over. Nothing had worked until Draco had walked in. With his hands firmly gripping her shoulders as he murmured words of encouragement, his presence helped ground her to the now, drawing the line between reality and the residual fear from the previous nights nightmare.
From experiencing his own nightmares, Draco knew a little company always helped. He had selflessly offered to stay with her that night, in her spare room, much to his own chagrin. His face betraying no hint of surprise when Hermione had hurriedly accepted his offer.
It was that first night that Hermione's nightmare had awoken him, scaring him half to death with her piercing screams. After that, he was consistently sneaking into her room to stop her tossing and turning, his presence always calming her movements. When she had moved into the cave, she had sheepishly suggested Draco sleep on the sofa as there was no second bedroom. Despite the fact that she knew he would end up in bed with her, Hermione transfigured the sofa into a bed so it was more comfortable for him. Draco had watched her, smirking the whole time, knowing there was no way he was sleeping in her living room.
"I can hear your cogs turning, Granger," Draco joked, turning his full attention to her. He had been waiting for her to talk, willing her to come to him. Her earlier scattiness was so unlike her, but Draco didn't want to force the issue. He had a feeling it was something she needed to choose to confide in him about. "What's up?"
Slightly embarrassed, Hermione twirled some pasta onto her fork. "Well, umm," Hermione hesitated before blurting out, "would you stay with me tonight?" and hastily stuffing the food into her mouth. Despite the fact Draco had frequently stayed with her to help with the nightmares, actually asking him to stay seemed to cement that fact that she was more shaken by today's events than she cared to admit.
"Seriously?" Draco began as Hermione shrunk back in her chair. "That's what you were worried about? If you want me to stay, I'll stay. Simple. Just don't try that sofa nonsense, you know we both sleep better sharing the bed."
Hermione smiled shyly, her relief making her relax briefly in her seat as Draco stood and took their plates to the kitchen. "I'm just going to go shower then I'll see you in bed, yeah?" he called as he headed off to Hermione's bathroom.
Hermione rose from the table and nodded as she returned to the living room in search of her favourite book of fairytales, surprised to find her coat and bag hanging on the hook before turning to head back to her room.
Lying in bed later that night, Hermione tossed and turned. She had asked Draco to stay to help her sleep. And yet, as he laid sleeping soundly next to her, all of her thoughts were of Ron.
Ron, the love of her life, her husband, her first. They had shared and been through so much, but the thought of telling him she could be pregnant terrified her. Hermione knew he loved her and only wanted the best for her, but sometimes she felt it was only on his terms. She had been so thrilled to be given the opportunity to work and live in this ancient magical cave, but Ron had reacted badly, shouting and screaming at her for 'putting her career first' before storming out in a huff, not to be seen for the rest of the night.
Draco rolled over and reached out for Hermione, his arm snaking around her waist as if he could sense her troubled thoughts even in his sleep. Pulling her tightly against his body, Draco released a contented sigh before continuing to doze, and Hermione felt herself relax, albeit slightly. Maybe she would get some sleep tonight after all.
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