AN: Thanks dear readers, I'm glad you're enjoying these pieces! This little scene is taken from Chapter 4 of "All His Colors"
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The crescent was falling.
Tingling sensations that had overtaken her legs, crawling up like a multitude of ants from the tips of her toes to the back of her knees, were fading away. Perhaps her limbs had fallen so deeply asleep she no longer felt them. Perhaps she herself was dissipating away from the waking world. She didn't know anymore. She just kept herself still. Maybe in the next hour…
The stars were fading.
Slight movements of the air brought a chill to drying tracks left on her cheeks. There were no footsteps to be heard beyond the perimeter, no breaths except her own in this vast dojo estate. She should cover herself with a blanket before catching a cold, but her body would not move. Maybe in the next hour…
Warm and cool tones were invading the sky's periphery.
She leaned heavily onto the solid wood of the porch pillar, a favorite spot of her husband's. The sand-smoothed grains pressing against her temples brought none of their familiar comfort. Her cerulean eyes stared blankly at the washtub sitting at the center of their compound. He would've been bent over it by now, sleeves tied back neatly, greeting the glory of dawn with sheets and suds. But the tub was empty, and their bedding was an uncollected mess on the floor.
Maybe in the next hour…
Puffs of white rolled against a backdrop of clear blue. The heat of day had peaked.
She stared at the dojo gate that stood silently unmoving. While the sunlight had turned blinding, no illumination reached inside of her, gulped away by the cavern at the center of her chest. How long had she been waiting?
A sob pushed its way out, failing to bring any more wetness to her eyes. It stung, still. Her mind couldn't stop thinking about his words. Couldn't stop seeing those haunted, pained golden eyes of his. She, the second wife, failing to live up to his first.
Tomoe… she would never be Tomoe…
Her head dug onto the grains of the wood as it listed downwards, fist balling up on trembling thighs that had sat kneeling for hours on end. New waves of sobs rocked her body. She brought her arms around herself. No more tears… no more… she was done shedding them.
A part of her wanted to scream at him. His ever-mysterious unspoken thoughts. How he had disappeared, yet again, leaving broken puzzle pieces at her feet without any semblance of a clue as to how to put it all back together. Yes, she wasn't Tomoe, and to hell with that. If he'd wanted his dead wife back even after all this time, after he himself had asked her to marry him, she'd have no part of this mess. She should've just walked away.
How could he have said that… How could he?
Her palms covered her forehead and eyes. Her head shook from side to side, flinging droplets from her lashes. No… no. There must be more to this.
Something had triggered the second awakening of his amber eyes, the cutting words of his outburst, she was sure of it. Though she never liked to pry, she wouldn't hold anything back this time. She would get her answers.
Kaoru closed her eyes, loosening the jaw muscles that gnashed her teeth together, forcibly breathing the breath she was holding. Her bones were beyond exhausted but she couldn't fall apart yet. He might come back - he always came back - and he would need her. She wouldn't push him away. She would never. Gulping in gasps of air now, she brought her arms tighter around herself.
Maybe in the next hour…
The creaking of wood brought her head snapping up. A pale, slightly trembling hand pushed the gate slightly ajar. Her heart pounded. At the emerging sight of tousled auburn hair interlaced with bamboo leaves, her arms loosened and the pressure on her chest lifted. The hunched man stepped inside and raised his head to lift the shadows of his bangs away from his violet eyes. Those beautiful eyes, now gaunt and hollowed-out, pierced with the pain she never wanted to see reflected there again.
Kaoru's breath caught.
Her husband hesitated at the door, gaze locked with hers. She stayed put, using what little strength remained to raise her arms outstretched at her sides. The full blossom of a smile that she directed at him ignored all traces of her lingering tears. Her mouth moved to say welcome home.
Kenshin stood for just a second more before stumbling towards her as fast as a maimed soldier could go, knees buckling to the ground before the raised platform of their porch, arms reaching for her shoulders. She caught his face before he could say I'm sorry, pressed her forehead to his, and shushed him. His eyes were still wide and lost when her lips touched his temples. She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck, burying his head in her chest. In reciprocal, his hands slid down and around the small of her back, closing with aching tension, fingers digging into the fabric of her yukata. The musty smell of earth and forest that clung to him filled the large intake of breath she took in, and his warmth felt so right back in her embrace.
Yes, she needed answers. But for now… it could wait.