Deacon had just walked out to his truck after a day of rehearsals with Sheryl Crow. She had invited him to be in her band for the recording of her latest album and he was happy to be working with her. For most of the past year, he had worked around town wherever he could pick up work. It had taken him months of physical therapy to get his hand back close to what it had been before the accident. And then it had taken him time to get steady work. It felt like he had gone back to where he'd been after his fifth stay in rehab. Although he was considered one of the best lead guitarists in Nashville, his involvement in the accident that had nearly killed Rayna and had exposed his own problems, yet again, had made many people wary. He had been pissed about it, even though he knew it was his own doing, but he kept that to himself and tried to rebuild his reputation. Slowly but surely he had done that and this was his reward.
When his phone rang, he looked at it and didn't recognize the number. He had gotten in the habit of ignoring numbers he didn't know; after the accident, reporters would get his number and call looking for a story or some gossip and he quit answering. But for some reason, he decided to answer this one.
"Hello?"
"Um, hello, is this Mr. Deacon Claybourne?" came an unfamiliar female voice.
"Who's calling?"
"I'm calling from the emergency room at Vanderbilt Medical Center. A Miss Maddie Conrad asked me to call you."
Deacon's heart thudded when he heard Vanderbilt Medical Center, but when he heard Maddie's name he felt a chill run up his spine. Had something happened to Maddie? Or to Rayna? "Yeah, I, uh, I know Maddie Conrad. Is something wrong?"
"She's been in an accident and she told us that you were her father. Can you come to the hospital?"
"Is she ok?" His voice caught in his throat.
"It's not serious, but the doctor can talk to you more when you get here."
"I'll be right there." He ended the call. Why did Maddie call me? Why did she tell them I was her father? He still didn't feel like much of a father to her and their relationship still wasn't easy. They would play guitar together and that seemed to help them bridge the awkwardness. Juliette would often be the one to bring Maddie to see him and she encouraged both the teenager and Deacon to work on their relationship, to work on getting to know each other a different way. He didn't understand, really, what Juliette's interest was, but he could see that she was helping Maddie feel more comfortable including him in her life. And he appreciated that.
He did talk to Rayna about Maddie, but their conversations were infrequent and usually very stiff and awkward. Rayna mostly texted him, only occasionally talking to him over the phone, but she would still not see him. The estrangement from Rayna made him angry at times, but mostly made him sad. She had been the love of his life, still was, and he hated how everything that had happened after he'd found out Maddie was his had seemed to destroy that, as well as any good feelings she'd had towards him.
He had battled his demons, was still battling them. Working through the pain of his childhood and the damage that his father had visited on him had not been easy. He was afraid that he couldn't be a good father because he hadn't had a good role model and it had made him keep some distance with Maddie. But he was trying. So he saw this as a sign that it was working.
As he drove to the hospital, he wondered if Rayna would be there. He hadn't thought of it at first, but was sure that the hospital had called them both. So he would see her. He wondered what she would say, how she would react. It almost made him turn around, but he didn't want to let Maddie down. It would be worse if he didn't show up at all.
When he got to the hospital, he hurried to the emergency room and asked for Maddie. A nurse came and led him to a curtained off area. His face was a mask of concern as he walked in and saw Maddie. She was laying with her head turned away and he could see she had a bandage on her forehead.
"Maddie?" he said, and she turned and gave him a small smile. He walked up to her and took her hand. "What happened?"
Maddie rolled her eyes. "It's really not a big deal. I was with some friends and we were leaving the mall and someone ran into us from behind. I hit my head on the seat."
When Deacon realized it was a car accident, he felt sick. All he could think about was his and Rayna's accident. He was relieved that this one had been relatively minor. "How do you feel?"
"I have a headache. They said it was a concussion."
Just then the doctor came in and confirmed that it was, in fact, a concussion, pretty minor, but they wanted to keep Maddie overnight for observation. They were ready to move her to a room, so someone would be coming to take her up in just a few minutes. That's when Deacon thought again about Rayna.
"Is your mom on the way?" he asked Maddie.
She gave him a look that he'd seen before when Rayna's name came up. Maddie was still not fully reconciled with her mother and their relationship was very strained. "No," she said firmly. "I just gave them your name."
Deacon breathed in. "You know she needs to know."
Maddie shrugged. "I guess. Whatever."
This father stuff was still new enough, but dealing with an angry teenager was not what he had bargained for. He decided not to argue with her, but he would call Rayna and let her know what was going on.
As he followed the nurse taking Maddie up to a room, he tried calling Rayna. The call went to voice mail. He sighed and sent her a text, letting her know what was going on.
Rayna dropped Daphne at her friend's house for a sleepover. She was getting annoyed over not hearing from Maddie. Maddie had gone with some friends to the mall after school, but it was after 6 and she still wasn't home. And her phone was going straight to voice mail. She searched for her phone in her purse before she pulled out. When she realized she'd left it at home, she swore. Maddie better be home when I get there, she thought.
When she got to the house, Maddie wasn't there. Rayna sighed deeply and, spotting her phone on the counter, picked it up to try her daughter again. But she saw that she had missed a call, surprisingly from Deacon, and that she had a text from him. She clicked on the message. Maddie in accident. She's ok. At Vandy. U should come.
Rayna gasped. "Oh, my God," she murmured. She grabbed her purse and headed for the hospital.
Rayna hurried to the nurse's station and got Maddie's room number. When she walked in the room, she stopped short. Maddie was lying in the hospital bed with a bandage on her forehead. Deacon was sitting next to her bed, holding her hand. She felt a fluttering in her heart. She hadn't seen him in months. She wasn't sure what to say.
At her approach, he looked up and raised his eyebrows. Then he turned back to look at Maddie and squeezed her hand. "Your mama's here," he said when she opened her eyes.
Maddie turned to look at Rayna. Her expression gave away nothing. "What happened?" Rayna asked breathlessly.
"I was in a car accident," Maddie said matter of factly. "I'm ok. It's just a concussion."
Rayna felt weak in the knees. All she could think about was the accident she'd been in with Deacon. The one that had almost killed her. She could barely breathe. She hurried to Maddie's side. "I want to see the doctor." She looked at Deacon. "Have you seen the doctor?"
Deacon nodded. He felt uncomfortable, like he was intruding. Which was ridiculous, since Maddie had asked the nurse to call him, but he felt like Rayna was unhappy he was here. It had been so long since they'd been in the same room, the same space together. He had hoped that time would heal the wounds, but it didn't seem like it had. "The doctor said it's a concussion, some scrapes and bruises. He should be back in here in a minute."
"I don't understand…." she started, but then was interrupted when the doctor arrived.
"I'm Dr. Wilson," he said after shaking her hand. "As I told your husband," he nodded towards Deacon "Maddie's going to be fine. We're going to keep her overnight just for observation but you'll be able to take her home in the morning."
Rayna looked at Deacon when the doctor referred to him as her husband. It made her feel oddly sad, but she decided to just leave it be. "Thank you, Dr. Wilson. That makes me feel better."
"We'd like to run a few tests right now. If the two of you want go to the waiting room, the nurse will let you know when we're done."
Deacon took Maddie's hand again. "I'm gonna go on. I'll see you later, ok?"
Maddie frowned. "No. You can go wait with Mom. I asked you to come, so I want you to stay."
Deacon looked at Rayna and she nodded. He turned back to Maddie. "Ok. I'll see you in a bit." He smiled at her and then turned and followed Rayna out of the room. They walked to the waiting room side by side, not talking.
Rayna sat down and Deacon hesitated for a moment before he sat in a chair at a ninety degree angle to hers. A few more minutes passed before Rayna spoke. "So Maddie called you?" she asked quietly.
Deacon looked at her. He nodded. "Yeah. Actually the hospital called. But she gave them my number."
"Why?" Her tone wasn't accusatory, just questioning.
Deacon cleared his throat. "I, uh, I don't really know. I thought she'd probably given both our names and maybe they weren't able to get you. But when I got here, she told me she only gave them mine."
Rayna smiled sadly and then looked away. Deacon could tell that her feelings were hurt. He didn't really know what to say, so he didn't say anything. It had been so long since he had seen her and he wanted to reach out to her, to tell her it was ok and not to read anything into this. He wanted to hold her because he knew this had scared her, that the words "car accident" had scared her. They had scared him too. He sat, watching her, and rubbed his hand across his mouth. "Can I get you anything?" he asked quietly.
Rayna took a breath and shook her head. "So what happened? What was this car accident?" She felt hurt that Maddie had deliberately not called her. It felt like they were farther apart than ever.
Deacon wondered if these were the kinds of conversations that she'd had with Teddy all these years. Worrying about Maddie, talking about things that she'd done. All the conversations the two of them should have been having. Fifteen months was a long time. He had accepted that Rayna didn't want him in her life, that she didn't want to have anything to do with him. She'd done that before, when she had married Teddy. This time had felt so final though and it still made him incredibly sad to think about it. He'd forgiven her long ago. He just wished she could forgive him. He cleared his throat and rubbed his hands over his mouth before answering. "From what I understand, she was with some friends. Another car ran into them from behind at a stop sign. Maddie was in the backseat and she hit her head on the seat in front of her, pretty hard. Nobody else in the car had anything more than bruises." Before he thought about what he was doing, he reached for her hand. "She's fine, Ray."
Rayna looked down at his hand on hers. She had almost forgotten what his touch felt like, how it felt for him to hold her hand. She could tell he realized what he'd done and he started to pull away, but she closed her fingers over his. She smiled at him tentatively. "Thanks," she said. "For being here with her."
His eyes looked deep into hers. His brow furrowed. "I'm just glad I could be here."
Rayna took her hand away then and took a deep breath. "It's probably time for us to figure all of this out, don't you think?"
Deacon sat back and lifted his eyebrows. "About Maddie?"
Rayna nodded. "Yeah. I think we have to. We need to figure out how we can help her." She looked away. "I think it's time to stop acting like this didn't happen."
Deacon frowned. "That was what you wanted, though."
Rayna looked back at him. She hadn't realized until that moment how much she had missed him. He had been in her life for so long and then she had banished him. She had tried not to think about him, although every time she looked at Maddie she couldn't help it. But she had worked hard to move past all the complicated feelings she had for Deacon after the accident. It hadn't been entirely successful. She nodded in response to his observation. "Yeah, I know. I thought we needed some space. All of us. But maybe I was wrong. It's not like ignoring it is going to make it not be true."
Deacon shook his head slowly. "No, it does not." He leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. "I did need some time to get used to the idea of being a father. You know I didn't have a good role model. And Maddie was so angry at me. For hurting you. I know you don't want to hear this, but Juliette has actually been a big help to her. She's been someone Maddie could talk to. About things. Juliette could relate to her. She's been a good friend."
Rayna looked skeptical. "To both of you?"
Deacon nodded. "Yeah, to both of us. But just as a friend, Rayna. She and I are way past anything but that."
Rayna smiled a little. "I know. It's just hard for me to think about Juliette Barnes doing anything for unselfish reasons."
Deacon smiled back. "She's got a lot more layers than you think. She just tries hard not to show them." He let out a quiet chuckle. "She isn't judgmental with Maddie. Just with me."
Rayna nodded. She sat back and tears sprang to her eyes. She couldn't look at Deacon. "I feel like I've failed Maddie. And I failed you," she said brokenly. "I failed everybody." Tears rolled down her cheeks.
"No, you didn't, Ray. You did the right thing for everybody." He hated seeing her cry. "When I was sitting in that jail cell," he said quietly, "I realized that you did the only thing you could do. I was a drunk. You couldn't depend on me. I totally got it." He rubbed his hands over his mouth and breathed in. "I forgave you a long time ago, Ray. I just wish I could have told you that sooner."
She turned to look at him, her face streaked with tears, pain in her eyes. "Deacon, I…." she started. But then the nurse walked up and interrupted them.