Chapter 2 The Little Things

May 24, 2011

It was six months ago today that I now know I realised what was the right thing to do when it came to Nick. I was so bloody confused in my head, having just told him we couldn't be together, that I wasn't ready to be a mother, that I wasn't prepared to give up Homicide just so that we could be together. I needed someone to tell me I'd done the right thing, that I'd made the right decision, and I thought for sure Bernice would be the one to do that. But then she admitted that she let her career cost her her marriage and just the tone of her voice told me that she regretted that greatly. Then she assured me I could sit in her chair one day if I dedicated myself to it enough. It was a lot to think about, but I didn't know right then if that was what I really wanted. Did I want to make that big of a sacrifice? To be high up in my job but unhappy in every other aspect of my life? Was the job worth all that? Then when I watched her sing with tears in her eyes at the Women In Blue fundraiser I knew straight away that I didn't want to make that sacrifice at all. I still to this day appreciate the potential Bernice sees in me, but I knew if I worked towards stepping into her shoes I'd be taking more and more steps away from Nick, and I knew that wasn't what I wanted.

And thank God for that because now Nick and I are so happy together and everything is exactly like I'd never allowed myself to dream it being. I can't even put it into words properly. It's just…amazing. I'm so happy with him. I can't imagine ever being with anybody else. I don't want to be anyway. Tomorrow we're moving in together, so this is my last night in my little house. Never again will I live alone. I can't wait. We spend so much time together as it is that I pretty much do wake up beside him everyday anyway, but it'll be different when we live together. It won't be me staying at his place, or him staying at my place. It'll be us, in our place.

They'd worked all morning, loading Jen's furniture and boxes into the moving van themselves, taking sixteen hundred trips in and out the front door with their arms laden with her possessions. When the last box was stacked into the back of the van they stood one last time in her kitchen and looked around at the bare countertops and empty shelves. Jennifer hugged Nick around his waist and stared wistfully at the bareness of it all.

"Ready?" he asked her quietly.

She pulled out of his hug and nodded at him and they walked out the front door hand in hand. Nick stood by her side as she locked the door for the last time and then together they hopped into the truck and headed for their new place.

It was in a suburb Jen had fallen in love with at first sight. Then she saw the house and fell even further. She'd looked at Nick and knew immediately that he felt the same. It had everything they wanted. From aesthetic things, like lots of light, big windows, a big wrap around veranda, to the personal touches they hadn't discussed but knew they both wanted. Things like three bedrooms, a good sized kitchen, large front and back yards, a friendly looking street, a cosy little community close to everything they knew they'd need and want in the years to come. There would be room enough to play cricket in the backyard, or do a lay up on the front driveway. There was plenty of space for a Christmas tree in the living room, and for more than two people at the dinner table. It was far enough away from work and closer to schools and playgrounds. All the little things added up to just the right house for them. And even though they didn't have half the things yet that they'd planned, it was perfect.

They spent the rest of the day unloading the truck, and when they finally took a break in the late afternoon and plopped themselves down against a bare wall in the living room, Nick sat with his legs outstretched and Jen lay horizontally beside him, her head resting on his thigh. "I think we've about done enough for today, what do you reckon?" he mused.

"Mmmm definitely," she replied tiredly. She cast her eyes over the stacks of boxes that surrounded them. Her eye caught on an open box within arms length and she sat up, trying to figure out what it was that was glinting and catching her eye poking out of the top. She reached for it as Nick sat behind her, his eyes closed briefly in rest, not watching what she was doing. She sat cross legged next to the bulging box and took a closer look.

Resting on the top was a silver edged photo frame, almost exactly the size of her leather journal, and slid underneath the glass was a photograph of herself and Nick. She didn't recognise it and wondered when it had been taken. Her hair was a bit longer, so it must've been quite a while ago, she thought to herself. Probably someone's farewell down at the local coppers watering hole. Some kind of celebration obviously. They looked happy together in the photo, posed casually, looking like bestest buddies with him squeezing her shoulder tightly and them both grinning widely at the camera. They looked like they'd had a few. It was exactly the kind of photo Jen would've chosen to frame too if she'd had it. She turned around to Nick, holding the frame in her hand.

"Where is this from?" she asked, looking at him curiously, a small smile threatening to escape her lips. The picture was that gorgeous, it had that affect.

Nick opened his eyes reluctantly and looked over at her. When he saw what she was holding he smiled and folded his arms across his chest. "It's from work," he replied.

"Work?" she asked, confused now.

He nodded. "I used to keep it in my drawer, where no one else could see it," he explained. "But now I reckon it belongs here. We should put it on display. Christen the mantelpiece with it or something." Nick smiled at her and she looked back down at the photograph. It captured so perfectly their happiness together and made her smile too. She nodded at his suggestion and pulled herself up to standing to place it on the mantel opposite where they were sitting. She set it down carefully in the very centre.

"Perfect," he smiled as she sat back down next to him. "I have a copy in my wallet too," he whispered in her ear.

She's a picture in my wallet

My unborn children's mother

She's the hand that I'm holding

When I'm on my knees and praying

She turned to him and couldn't help but grin her face off as her heart melted right before his eyes. "Oh Nick…" she sunk into his chest. She almost didn't know what else to say. "How did I ever live without you?"

He smiled back at her and kissed her forehead as she got up a few moments later and walked into the kitchen to clean up. Feeling playful, he let her get half way through filling the sink with water before he got up and crept up behind her. He stood at her back and slipped his hands underneath her t-shirt, smoothing his hands over the warm skin of her hips and waist as he rested his head in the groove between her neck and her shoulder. The instant she felt him touch her she stopped what she was doing and eased her head back to be against his. His hot breath tickled her neck as he whispered devilishly into her ear.

"Should we christen any other parts of the house?"

Jennifer let out a tiny giggle and opened her eyes as she turned around in his arms to face him. He pulled her in even closer, pressing their bodies together and creating heat between them instantly. His arms encircled around her waist completely, he could hear her breathing quicken and he kissed the tiny bit of exposed collarbone that peaked out from under her shirt. She couldn't even answer, but Nick needed no verbal confirmation.

He lifted her up onto the bench top, knocking over a few wine glasses that were fortunately plastic. She gave a squeal in surprise but a second later was grinning stupidly, too caught up in the moment to care about a messy kitchen. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him deeply, enjoying every sensation he was creating in her. He had her t-shirt off in the blink of an eye and she quickly did the same to his, discarding it haphazardly on the floor by the fridge where it came to rest in a crumpled heap. He moved in closer to the edge of the bench, closer to her, and ran his hands over her head, appreciating the way her hair was already damp and tousled, the way he liked it. This is when you look your most beautiful…when you give in for a while and relax Nick thought. He was so in love with her, it blew his mind.

Their kisses became more fervent, their limbs more tangled, but it wasn't completely working. "Nick," Jen breathed, her forehead resting against his, her eyes closed, trying to catch her breath. "Let's christen the bedroom first hey? The kitchen can wait for tomorrow night."

He looked at her, shocked to hear her say something so racy. But it wasn't like he disagreed. He picked her up off the bench top and she clung to him with her arms and legs as he barrelled down the hallway with her. Jennifer couldn't help but laugh again at the spontaneity of it all, and thought for a second how one day they would be chasing their children down this hallway, scurrying them off to bed or for a bath. She couldn't wait for all their years in this house together.

Nick took them into the bare bedroom, nothing in there but the bed itself, a mattress protector and a fluffy white doona that had been quickly and messily spread across the mattress earlier that afternoon. He flung her down on the bed and she gave another yelp in excitement as she bounced atop the blanket, her noises an unrecognisable characteristic in the detective everyone else knew. But Nick knew better. He knew who she really was. And right now she was irresistible, and the only woman he wanted to be with.

He crawled on top of her and leant down for another kiss, feeling their lips almost bruising as they connected urgently. He ran another hand over her forehead and through her blonde hair and then worked his way down her, discarding every piece of clothing that shielded her from his view. As he tugged at her jeans, he struggled with their slim fit and when he finally managed to tug the last leg off, her foot flung up in the air and down again hard on the wooden foot of the bed from the effort of it all and he gasped and stopped at hurting her.

She sat up and laughed again as she pawed at his chiselled bare chest, pulling him back to her. "Don't worry," she said, chuckling. "Keep going keep going," she instructed him breathlessly. They both breathed in deeply as they kissed again, hungry for each other and feeling the passion between them ignite even further.

Nick smiled at her between kisses. "I promise I won't injure you when we christen the kitchen…" he whispered. She grinned and kissed him again as he went on. "…And the lounge room…and the bathroom…"

She laughed and hurled him over underneath her and he beamed up at her, totally in love.