I've updated quickly this time!

Here's the second chapter.

Important note: Anythign concerning Morgana and Mordred is set in the past. It begins in this chapter two months earlier than the current plot and it will always be in the past. Morgana and Mordred scenes are slowly building up to the present and when it reaches the current timeline I will inform you of it.

Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin, if i did season 5 would be a whole lot different I'm thinking

The lyrics at the beginning: Airborne Toxic Event, Welcome to Your Wedding Day

Chapter 2: From the Inside Out

And you know it's begun from the beat of the drum

And the screams from the mouths of babes

And we pray as we're watching the charade

Welcome to your wedding day

We make it or break

Two Months Earlier

Morgana had never been alone. When she was young and her father died, her loneliness was filled by Uther who took her in and gave her a home. When she grew up and Uther became less of a man she believed him to be, the gap was filled by Arthur who she had considered her closest friend. Arthur was not present when she awoke screaming from nightmares though, but Guinevere was and the gap was filled again. When she left Camelot, fought against it, it was beside her sister Morgause. Morgause was dead and there was no one to fill the void.

She was truly alone. She had Agravaine but she only saw him once a month if that and she knew he was only in it for power and prestige and not because of any blood relation. He held no love for her and so his presence only made her feel that more alone.

This made her question her motives, her intentions. Since she had truly cut off all ties to Camelot and the Pendragons, she had never looked back. She had felt safe with Morgause, she felt loved by Morgause, and she felt like she was on the path chosen for her. She belonged on the side of magic. And now, for the first time, she was questioning this decision because she had no one left. She only ever wanted to be accepted, to be loved for whom she was and somehow, this want, had led to her being completely and utterly alone.

So when a voice began talking to her in her head, she listened because she knew the voice and it was a voice of someone who knew her and loved her. And all the thoughts of doubt filtered away from her thoughts.

Present

She was staring at him again. She tried to bring her concentration to the council meeting (the second one in two days), to focus on what was being said, what was happening because she was a queen now, still difficult to believe, and she needed to. It was her duty to the people, to be the person who sat beside the King on equal ground. But as soon as she brought her concentration back to the matter at hand, her gaze would land on the man who sat directly in her line of vision and she would be lost again.

She knew she shouldn't be looking because she was a queen and she was married and she loved her husband, but she loved the man sitting across from her too and she couldn't help it. She loved him and she loved her husband and she loved her people and her heart was shattering.

She knew she should be happy. She, Guinevere, daughter of a blacksmith and handmaiden to the Lady Morgana, had become queen of Camelot. She had married a Prince that loved her. She had a title and she was able to represent the people of a land that she loved. She would die for this kingdom without a second thought. That wasn't the problem. She would give her body, her mind to the kingdom, but her heart, that belonged to a knight.

A knight that had come from no noble family, that had no royal blood, and was never destined to become king. This knight had come to her as a man who had no one and had nothing expect a strong, noble, and true heart. This man had been her knight before he was given the title of 'Sir' and had given her his strong, noble, and true heart even when he knew she loved another.

She was the Queen of Camelot, her husband was King Arthur, and she was hopelessly in love with Sir Lancelot.

Merlin, in the beginning, had loved the council meetings. He swelled with such pride to be able to sit on equal measure with kings, queens, knights, and noblemen at the Round Table; his word counting the same as those who he had been below his entire life. Not only, sitting at the Round Table, but sitting on Arthur's right had side had made the experience even better. He had begun his journey to Camelot five years ago. He was Arthur's servant for those five years and now he was able to sit next to Arthur on equal ground. He was happy, truly happy.

It was no longer the beginning, and now, Merlin dreaded coming to these meetings. It wasn't that they weren't helpful; they accomplished a lot in these meetings. It wasn't because Gwaine would always put in his two cents either, whether it was helpful or not (most of the time it was the latter). It wasn't because he would still receive glares from the Curmudgeons. No, it wasn't for any of these reasons.

No, he hated these meetings because he noticed.

He noticed the sly looks that Agravaine would sometimes adopt when certain plans were discussed. It was the looks of plotting that the Curmudgeons would send each other when they thought no one saw. It was the muttered remarks Merlin heard other make under the breaths. It was the looks he saw Gwen send Lancelot's way.

Merlin hated these meetings, because after all this time even at a table that forced equality, people still believed that Merlin couldn't hear or see anything. That they believed he wouldn't say anything, because outside this room, his word would not trump theirs.

He knew everyone's secrets and it was eating up inside.

Arthur, every once and awhile, would turn to Merlin to gage his opinion. He wasn't usually looking for a verbal remark, because Merlin always said something, but a cue. He was looking for some facial recognition that he said the right thing or had made the right decision.

And Merlin would always turn and give Arthur a smile of reassurance even though he just saw Agravaine steal a piece of a map from the table or he just witnessed a note passed from Borin to Sir Hector or he just saw Gwen's eyes travel once again to Lancelot.

And the lies just kept piling up and up and up.

"Missing?"

Arthur ran his fingers over his bottom lip like he always did when he was thinking. His mind was playing out different scenarios, different reasons, and different persons to why the courtier went missing.

Sir Leon, who was head of the knights and was in charge bringing forth the news the other knights reported to him, nodded. "He was due back about two days ago. I sent out a couple knights yesterday to follow his route and all they found were several footprints belonging to man and several horses but there was no sign of any living soul."

Merlin was trying to remember the name of courtier. He sifted in his seat, trying to find a more comfortable position for his healing ribs. Arthur glanced over at Merlin, but quickly turned his attention back to the meeting. Leon noticed but said nothing.

"What was his route?"

All eyes turned to Deverick, a member of the Curmudgeons and in charge of running the system of courtiers. He took this as a cue to pull forth a paper that listed the courtiers that left this week, where they were headed, and what they were carrying.

He cleared his throat but his voice still came out deep. "He was bringing a letter to Duke Bale of the kingdom of Lauith. He left at the beginning of this week; the letter was nothing of dire importance or secret." The name of the courtier was not recorded nor the actual contents of the letter.

"Bandits wouldn't kidnap a courtier; everyone knows they don't carry money." Sir Elyan stated. He usually stated facts like that to try and help narrow down the field. Merlin appreciated it immensely; it helped him focus his thoughts.

Agravaine cleared his throat and Merlin cringed hoping most would take the look as a sign of pain from his ribs. "If I may…" It was posed as a question but everyone knew that man would talk whether they said 'no' or not. "Why are we so worried about one courtier missing if he wasn't carrying anything of value?"

Why do you care what we focus on? Was it your plan to kidnap the courtier? Merlin thought darkly and his thoughts reflected on his face.

"A man who works for the royal court is taken and you're wondering if we should look into the matter?" Gwaine stated sarcastically as he leaned back in his chair.

Yes, that's important but not the only thing… Merlin scrunched his eyebrows together in concentration. He shifted again to lean forward in his seat, one hand on his side and one hand resting on the table with his head bowed.

Arthur looked over worriedly.

"He wasn't just kidnapped; he was taken from Camelot soil." Gwen supplied.

Meaning it was of importance, but what importance and to whom…

"That necessarily makes important enough to hold a meeting and send out knights?" Others were giving sounds of agreement with Agravaine.

"So you think he was taken because he worked for the royal court?" Percival, ignoring Agravaine, asked to Gwaine who had spoken up earlier.

That isn't the reason. "Because it wasn't bandits." Merlin didn't realize he had said that aloud until silence reigned over the table. He looked up to see all sets of eyes on him. Oh, did I cut off Gwaine's answer? He knew it was still a surprise to some to see a servant on the same level as a knight.

"What, Merlin?" Gwaine sounded amused.

Merlin glanced around sheepishly at the group. "Well, it was important because it wasn't bandits that took him." His eyes met Arthur's who was looking just as confused as the rest of the group.

"Why is that important Merlin?" Arthur addressed him directly.

Merlin sat up, as much as his ribs would allow, in his seat. "This normally wouldn't be important, I mean, courtiers go missing because they are constantly traveling through woods and such." Merlin was using his hand for emphasis. "But this courtier isn't missing because of the woods and he wasn't taken by bandits. He was taken, as Leo—Sir Leon reported, by men on horses directly from Camelot, which is probably why it stuck out as odd to you Leon, Sir." Merlin looked towards Leon who nodded.

Arthur tried to bring Merlin's attention back to him. "But why is that important?" Merlin sent Arthur a glance that said 'it's cute that you don't understand.'

"Because that means it was planned. Not only planned, but it was important. Someone went to the trouble of finding when this exact courtier with this exact letter was leaving, what route he was taking, and when he was leaving. Then they managed to organize men who were good enough to kidnap this man directly from Camelot. This was a planned kidnapping and it was important to someone."

There it was that wisdom that Arthur did not know Merlin had. "So it should be important to us." Arthur said as the pieces clicked together in his mind.

"That was intuitive." Lancelot smiled at Merlin.

Merlin shrugged. "Elyan was the one that pointed it out."

Agravaine gripped the table tight in his right hand. Merlin was the only one who noticed and he just looked away, hoping that all these lies wouldn't come tumbling down around him any time soon because it was nice being looked at with appreciation from Arthur and not betrayal.

The meeting was finally over. After Merlin's revelation, plans were quickly made to discover who had kidnapped the courtier, which involved sending a group of soldiers and knights to surrounding villages to see if they had seen anything pass their though their towns.

Lancelot stood up from his chair with the rest of the people in the room. Gwaine, who sat next to him, was stretching and making obscene sounds. His lips curled up despite his best efforts and he made his way to the door. He felt a presence next to him. He turned just as Gwen was sweeping past him; her long blue gown trailing behind her as she moved with grace. His eyes followed her until she turned a corner and left his field of vision.

A body bumped into his, he turned, and for a moment his eyes met Merlin's who was looking at him as if he knew his intentions, which was a completely ridiculously thought. He burned with embarrassment just the same as Merlin was dragged away from him by the king.

Hope you enjoyed the next chapter.

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