Chapter One

Jeff Winger was many things. Normally, he would not count "worrier" as one of these things, but something odd had beset Greendale Community College. Annie's unprecedented tardiness yesterday had seemed to set into motion a series of events in which everyone (and he did mean everyone, from Leonard to Fat Neil) was being unnaturally attentive.

To Annie in particular.

Really, to Annie exclusively.

It was, in a word, disconcerting.

Nothing had seemed off at first; Annie Edison was a well-known, if not exactly popular, face on the campus, so a few people here and there calling out a greeting to her didn't seem out of place. Jeff had been standing in the hall playing Bejeweled on his phone (not waiting around to make sure she arrived, clearly) and had glanced up in relief the first time someone had called out to her. As she came abreast of him, though, he started to notice that while moving through the crowd, Annie was leaving a path of infatuation behind her.

He wondered and silently gestured for her to precede him towards study room F, but didn't become concerned until they entered. And then he felt it; it was like the air was suddenly charged with electricity, sparking and buzzing as the entire group lifted their collective head and took notice of Annie's presence.

"Annie!" It came out of five mouths simultaneously, and Jeff could've sworn they were about to break into a round of applause, when Annie shot him a puzzled look then smiled shyly while taking her seat.

"Hi, everyone. Sorry about this morning. What did I miss?" She opened her bookbag and pulled out her neatly filed binder and notebook from their respective compartments, then looked up when no one answered her. Everyone but Jeff was grinning at her. "What happened?" She looked towards Jeff, who just shrugged in confusion. "Do I have something on my face?" she asked, worrying her bottom lip with her teeth and reach for her bag again.

To Jeff's further confusion, everyone laughed like Annie had just said the wittiest thing they'd ever heard.

Shirley wrapped an arm around Annie's shoulders and hugged her. "Oh, sweetie, I'm so glad that you choose to sit next to me every day." She sent a smug smile around the table. "Every day," she repeated.

Jeff was still trying to process this when, with a rush, the other members made a scramble for the empty chair that separated him and Annie. Troy even went so far to climb over the table, but Abed beat everyone to the spare seat and sent a small victorious smirk around the room.

Jeff finally couldn't contain his baffled irritation. "What the hell is going on?"

"That's what I'd like to know, too," Annie said, frowning.

Troy, now safely back in his seat, shook off his pout. "We really missed you this morning, Annie. It wasn't the same without you. And we love you." His face took on a soft, serious cast. "I love you."

Oooooh-kay. What? Jeff didn't realize he'd spoken until Annie glanced his way. And he saw it, she was freaked, on the surface, but behind it was the melting sentimentality that was loving this. Little Annie Adderall, with all her insecurities, was still in there, and Troy Barnes had just confessed his love.

"He doesn't mean it." For a horrified second, Jeff thought it had come out of his own mouth – again – but this time everyone turned to Britta instead. "He doesn't understand real love. He's just a man." Britta gave Annie a sultry smile that made Jeff sit up straight in his chair and pinch himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming. "No one can love you like a woman can. No one can know all the intimacies of your body like a woman."

"And who better than a slightly more mature woman?" Shirley interjected, resting her hand on Annie's arm. "I may not have some people's experience in this area, but that can be nice. We'll learn together."

Now, Jeff knew he definitely wasn't dreaming. Not even his perverse imagination could have come up with that scenario. "Alright, enough, guys. I don't know what game you're playing, but this isn't funny. Someone's going to-"

"Shut up, Winger," Pierce interjected, sending a lewd smile Annie's way. "If you're looking for maturity, look no further. I've got money, a mansion, and five years left max. I can make you a wealthy widow. And I know you'd appreciate the money. Because you're Jewish."

Annie grimaced her disgust, which caused a tidal wave of disapproval. Jeff looked to Abed. "Do you have anything to add?"

"No, Annie knows what I have to offer," he replied, then did that creepy eyebrow jiggle thing that reminded Jeff of jumping caterpillars.

"Okay, well, I'm sure Annie will take all of your declarations into consideration, but right now, can we please take our eyes off her and maybe – I don't know – study? Since this is a study-group and not an Annie Edison appreciation committee." As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he cursed himself.

"I call being Chairman of the committee," Troy shouted, causing a fight of a whole new kind.

"It's called a chairperson, Troy, and I want to be co-chair. Furthermore-"

"This is ridiculous," Jeff said to no one in particular over the din. He glanced at Annie, who was watching the proceedings with rapt interest. "I'm leaving to go study. Are you coming?"

"Noooo!" Five different voices called out. "Don't leave!"

Annie rested a hand on her neck and shot him a non-chalant smile and pointed at the proceedings. "I think I'm going to just, um, watch how this plays out. So, you know, no one gets hurt."

She was buying into this. She was completely letting this go to her head. Disgusted, Jeff nodded and walked out. The study room was blocked by a crowd of people all apparently staring through the blinds at the group. At Annie.

This was not natural. He had to get to the bottom of this.

Unfortunately, Annie was typically his partner for this type of thing.

It appeared as though he was on his own.