Drink Dulls The Mind
– Killer Croc
(Part One)
H•A•R•L•E•Y
"What's for dinner?" I ask J as we come in from the backyard and he raises a brow and looks at me.
"Think I give a fuck about dinner right now, huh?" He pours himself a drink and I cross my arms.
"It's late. The kids ain't had dinner yet, J. I ain't puttin' them to sleep without—"
"—Then cook them something." He snaps, taking a sip of his whiskey.
"Cook for them? I was about to go get a bath. I was hoping you'd help me out a little and get them something to eat."
"Since when are they my responsibility? Esther's here, now. And so are you. You're the women of the house. One of you make dinner. I'll be in my office." He reaches on top of the fridge and grabs a carton of cigarettes. "Come get me when the foods ready." He leaves the kitchen and I feel more tears prick at my eyes.
"I ain't startin' this again." I mumble under my breath before going after him.
When I get to his shut office door, I try to open it and it's locked.
I stomp to our room and grab my gun from my nightstand before going back to his door.
I shoot the knob off and kick the door in.
He doesn't flinch, still scribbling things down on a piece of paper.
"Thought I told you to cook dinner?" He says and I walk to his desk and snatch my engagement ring off my finger and slam it on his desk in front of him. "What?" He looks up at me.
"You're doin' it again."
"Doing what?" He looks confused.
"You get emotionally confused and you curl up in your shell and act like a prick because you don't know how else to cope. You're feeling mixed emotions about killing my sister and you're getting mean and bitchy as a defense mechanism to convince yourself that you're too heartless to regret anything and to miss anyone but me and you both know you're starting to regret killin' my sister and you might even miss her. Don't act like I'm too stupid to see what's goin' on. I might not be an active psychiatrist but I'm still a doctor." I raise my brows and he rolls his jaw.
"I don't regret killing her." He shakes his head. "That's not what I regret."
"Then what is it? What's gotten you so locked up all the sudden?"
"It's a bad time for us to get married." He blurts out and I'm taken back a moment.
"W-What?" I breathe out.
"We ain't breakin' up. I'm just sayin' it's a bad time to get hitched right now."
"And why're you suddenly thinkin' this?" I ask him shakily.
"You're not going to want to marry me when you find out what I'm really regretting right now." He explains and I shake my head.
"What're you talkin' about? You're wrong. You know I'll still love you regardless of what you've done. You know that." I tell him and he rubs his forehead.
"No I don't think—" I interrupt him.
"—It's probably not even that bad—"
"—I'm pretty sure it is—"
"—J, no it ain't. It's nothin' that big, I bet. Just—"
"—Harley, I can't tell you or you'll come over this desk and—"
"—Damnit, Joker, just tell me—"
"—I let some of my guys rape her before she was killed!" He outburst, loud enough for the whole city to hear him.
I feel as if I've been shot. The pure shock and horror seeping it's way into the reality of it all.
"Y–You . . . I don't understand, I . . . " I can't even finish, I just stand there like an idiot, my mouth open in shock.
"It's not the best time to get married." Is all he says before he kisses my hair and leaves.
J•O•K•E•R
"Arrorró mi niño,
arrorró mi sol,
arrorró pedazo,
de mi corazón.
Este niño lindo
ya quiere dormir;
háganle la cuna
de rosa y jazmín.
Háganle la cama
en el toronjil,
y en la cabecera
pónganle un jazmín
que con su fragancia
me lo haga dormir.
Arrorró mi niño,
arrorró mi sol,
arrorró pedazo,
de mi corazón.
Esta leche linda
que le traigo aquí,
es para este niño
que se va a dormir.
Arrorró mi niño,
arrorró mi sol,
arrorró pedazo,
de mi corazón.
Este lindo niño
se quiere dormir...
cierra los ojitos
y los vuelve a abrir.
Arrorró mi niño,
arrorró mi sol,
duérmase pedazo,
de mi corazón."
I wait quietly against the bedroom door for Esther to finish hushly singing to Vinny and tucking him into bed later on that night.
When she's finished, she kisses him on the forehead and turns and looks at me.
I nod behind me and she follows me down the stairs, to the kitchen and out to the back yard.
The moon shines down on the dead night of the city.
Hustle and bustle of Gotham echoes in the distance and she cross her arms and looks up at me.
"Hadlynn was raped bef—"
"—I know." She cuts me short. "I know she was. I've known."
"You're not angry?"
"I was at first." She tells me. "Being angry now is not going to bring her back, so there is no point."
A long moment of silence passes and she takes a deep breath.
"I pinned too much on you, when I was young." She starts. "I put my daughter in your care. Even if you were not raising her, I still told you to look out for her and make sure she was on the right track. I realize now, she was far too gone for anyone to get her to grow up. I do not have any room to talk, though. I was the same way when I was her age." She adds. "I just . . . You carry a human being inside of you for nine months, praying there is no complications along the way. Praying she is healthy when she is born. And when she is, you still are not relieved. Because then you have to worry about what she will be like in the years to come. Will you raise her good enough? Will she make the same stupid, ignorant decisions you made? I left her with those people, thinking my daughter would have a better life than me. Thinking they would do a better job at raising her. And I come back and find out she is more like me than I ever thought. She was making the most horrible decision's regarding her body and her health, and do not even get me started on her promiscuity. And when she finally settled down with Johnny, I thought 'God, she is finally growing up and getting serious about herself'. And then their marriage is a nightmare from start to finish. She invested most of her time into a man that did not think twice about her before he did what he wanted to do." She sighs. "I know exactly what that feels like." She scoffs. "They always say a majority of men marry a woman who has a similar personality to their mother. And a majority of women marry a man who has a similar personality to their father. And by god, Hadlynn married a man who acted almost exactly like Ra's."
"You think so?"
"I know so." She replies. "I am not angry at you for killing my daughter. I understand where you were coming from. And you will deny this, but when you panic, you make incredibly rash choices."
"I do not." I argue and she raises her brows.
"You were developing feelings for Harleen back in Arkham. You panicked and performed ECT on her. You realized, after she had Lucyfer, that you loved her. And in retaliation, you threw her into a vat of chemicals."
"That sounds a bit harsh when you say it like that."
"Not to mention when she threatened to leave you back in Arkham city you had a break down and tried to convince yourself you did not need her by snatching up any woman that showed you attention. And with you and Harleen about to marry soon, it sinks in that you can not be tempted or risk even the possibility of being tempted by Hadlynn because you do not want to screw it up so you have her killed. When you panic you make extreme choices. And that is a good thing and a bad thing. And I still love you, after all of it."
"Yeah?" I raise a brow.
"Yes." She assures me. "Because the man I came to love was not this Joker facade. He was sweet, and kind and caring and loving and a very, very good guy. And he still is." She shrugs. "When he wants to be."
This story will follow Suicide Squad starting in chapter 4.
Little warning, next chapter will be very emotional concerning Joker and Lucyfer.
Thank you guys so much for getting me this far! Now let's end this series with a fucking bang;)