I do not own Transformers or anything in relation, and it seriously pains me that I don't. I do own my OCs, SO DON'T STEAL THEM OR I WILL COME AFTER YOU AND MAKE YOUR LIFE A LIVING PIT! Enjoy. :D

Ch. 2

Artemis—8. Don't watch Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy Grail with the 'bots.

(Both sets of twins couldn't get why there were guys following King Arthur and his knights around while banging coconuts halves together.)

(Ratchet kept scoffing at and denouncing the scenes where people were hurt or sick.)

(Prowl tried to figure out the weight distribution between a Swallow and a coconut problem .)

(The femme's got annoyed with the Knights Who Say 'Ne'.)

(Prime's reaction was best, since he actually laughed so hard he started to cry [we were all freaked].)

('Bee annoyed everybody by playing the 'The Knights of the Round Table' song in a continuous loop for the next two days.)

(Don't tell anyone, but I dared him to do that.)

(Ironhide must have fallen into stasis several times, because I thought I heard snoring coming from his direction.)

(He perked up at the killer rabbit scene though.)

(Since then, Annabelle's stuffed bunnies and any book she possesses containing the fluffy creatures have been reduced to ash.)

(Any rabbit within fifty yards of her is blown to smithereens and stepped on for good measure.)

(And now the tot's pet rabbit Mr. Fluffy-Cottontail-Cuddlykins has gone missing.)

(It's not official yet, but the other day as I was walking through the base, I caught a whiff of something that smelled an awful lot like roasted rabbit coming from 'Hide and Chromia's quarters.)

(Poor Mr. Fluffy-Cottontail-Cuddlykins.)

Bay—9. Never screw around with strange prototype machines.

(And if you do, make sure you DO NOT BREAK THEM.)

(The Prof. has created this new Switch-a-roo machine [that's what I've dubbed it].)

(It was still in testing, but that didn't stop Swindle from breakin' in to Sumdac Tower and tryin' to jack it and sell it to his highest bidder.)

(We stopped him, but in the process 'Bee and I were thrown into the machine, causin' it to switch on and do whatever the heck it was made to before explodin'.)

('Bee and I were checked out by Ratch and cleared.)

(I think the effects were delayed though...)

(This mornin' I woke up in Bumblebee's body and he woke up in mine!)

(Now we're stuck like this until the Professor and Ratchet can put the machine back together to reverse what it did.)

('Bee, a little word of advice.)

(Think of my body as a museum exhibit.)

(DO NOT. TOUCH. ANYTHING!)

[A/N This will be an actual occurrence in the series.]

Hunter—10. Don't use Finding Nemo references.

" Hey, Mr. Grumpy-gills."

(Really not my brightest idea.)

(Bulkhead had just broken another tool of Ratchet's and he was not happy.)

(Go figure.)

(I had a lapse in judgment and let it slip.)

(Dad had to nurse my concussion because Ratch refused to.)

(Petty glitch.)

" Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming. What do we do? We swim, swim."

(Smokescreen and I had watched Finding Nemo when babysitting Annabelle, and he fell in love with the 'Just Keep Swimming' song.)

(He kept humming it everywhere he went!)

(I was losing my mind!)

(Being a Hybrid and the Fuser, I'm forbidden from actually hitting the other members of Team Prime unless we're in training or if it's absolutely necessary.)

(Dad didn't see this as absolutely necessary.)

(So there was only one thing left to do.)

(After Arcee had battled Airachnid and lost once again, I convinced Smokey to go and sing it to her.)

(I told him it'd cheer her up.)

(The plan backfired a little bit, because Smokescreen no longer has blind faith in me.)

(On the bright side: he's not singing the song anymore!)

"BUBBLES!"

(Jack, Miko, Raf, Annabelle, and I ran around the base blathering like the bubbles fish.)

(We'd only say the word 'bubbles' and if any of the 'Bots tried to leave the room, one of us would run over, grab them, and exclaim "My bubbles!")

(Big Blue [Ultra Magnus] still gives the kids a 'WTF?' face.)

(He's completely freaked out of me.)

(Mostly because I claimed him as my bubbles.)

(And snuggled him.)

(And picked him up like a doll.)

(And ran around the base with him like that.)

(All day long.)

" First day of school! First day of school!"

(It was the first day back to school for the kids.)

(I don't go anymore since Dad pulled me out, and being the Fuser, I don't need school anyway [not human school at least].)

(But that didn't mean I couldn't have fun with the prospect of it!)

(Bursting into his room the morning of, I started jumping all over my dad, belting out the reference.)

(The only problem was it was, like, four in the morning and he'd been up really late the night before.)

(Needless to say, Dad did not appreciate the wake up call.)

(He actually threatened to put me back in school.)

(Spoilsport.)

Artemis—11. Never tell Ratchet that he needs sleep.

(I admit, I sometimes have trouble watching what comes out of my mouth.)

(But I only had the mech's best interests at spark.)

(However... I wasn't in my most empathetic mood, since Ratch and I had been arguing.)

(I'd been trying to weasel about my check up and he got all touchy and things got blown all out of proportion.)

(Sick of fighting and done with him, I blurted out how he needed to rest.)

(Of course... being in the state I was... it didn't exactly come out as graceful as that...)

(It was a little bit more like... "Somebody sure needs their beauty sleep.")

(I might have mentioned something about him moving in with Oscar the Grouch because that'd be the only person who could stand him too.)

(I now suffer from a new pathological fear.)

(Wrenchophobia.)

Bay—12. Always use Powell as a scapegoat when the chance arises.

(Not that I'm condonin' lyin'.)

(You should always buck up and take responsibility for your own actions.)

(However... there are exceptions to every rule.)

(And I'd already had a really bad week with the press.)

(Besides, Powell was askin' for it!)

(It's his own fault all this happened because he wouldn't let us on his property to put out the fire!)

(Took Team Autobot and a whole battalion of firemen to put out the fire and keep it from spreadin' to other blocks.)

(A reporter bot hunted our team up afterwards and bombarded us with questions about why, since we were the first ones the scene, didn't we just put the fire out in the first buildin' to save most of the rest of the block.)

(Admittedly, we could've done that, even with Powell's insistence for us to stay out of it.)

(We never listen to him anyway.)

(Well... I don't at least)

(But we all kinda had our hands full at the time evacuatin' people.)

(And, personally, I didn't care if Powell's buildin' burnt down.)

(I hate the dude!)

(So I told the reporter somethin' along the lines of: "Why didn't we put it out? I'll tell ya why! Because Powell is an egotistical maniac who's animosity towards this team is more important than the safety of others! He didn't want us to put it out, and he didn't care who got hurt or killed because of it!)

(I might also have spewed somethin' about him bein' a scourge upon the race of humanity.)

(When asked what he thought of my comment, Optimus replied with: " I believe Bay put it quite nicely".)

(I love that Autobot! X3)

Hunter—13. Do use music as an interrogation tool.

(Team Prime had captured Soundwave and was holding him for questioning.)

(Trouble was, during the Q & A sessions, there was a lotta Q, but not so much A.)

(The team tried reasoning, threatening, and Dad even broke out one of his famous 'Stray from Megatron's Path' speeches.)

(Which was pretty awesome by the way.)

(Always epic to see Dad in action!)

(But everything ended in the same result.)

(Nothing.)

(Not so much as a peep.)

(Everyone was at their wits end when the kids and I suggested that we play annoying music until Soundwave snapped.)

(They all thought we'd snapped.)

(Thanks for the vote of confidence, guys...)

(Anyway, we plugged in Miko's iPod anyway and set our, admittedly crazy, plan into action.)

(Two hours of looped 'Party in the U.S.A.' later, Soundwave hasn't cracked yet.)

(But I guarantee you that the Decepticon surveillance officer will give in.)

(I have made it my personal mission to see that he breaks, and I always fulfill my missions.)

(So keep resisting all you want, Soundwave.)

(I've desecrated my iPod by downloading six hours worth of Justin Bieber onto it just for you.)

(Let's see who loses it first!)

*eye twitches*

Artemis—14. Don't reference Looney Tunes.

" Poor puddy-tat. He fall down go boom!"

(I got Optimus to say it.)

(Don't ask how because I don't even know.)

(I guess I've just got the boss 'bot wrapped around my little finger is all.)

(Everyone within earshot busted a gut laughing.)

(Well, everyone except Ratchet that is.)

(The medic thought Prime was having a nervous breakdown or something and immediately rushed him to the med bay.)

(Optimus spent several hours getting scanned and poked with needles [something he absolutely hates].)

(Needless to say he was not happy with me when he finally managed to escape.)

" I'm gonna kill that cwazy wabbit."

(I thought Ironhide would find a kindred spark in Elmer Fudd since they both have an aversion to rabbits.)

(After the "puddy-tat go boom" escapade with Prime, I was amazed I could get him to say the phrase.)

(When I say "get him to" I mean "trick".)

(No Ratchet incident this time thankfully, but 'Hide hates to be laughed at.)
(Especially when one of the subjects laughing is his spark-mate Chromia.)

(Just don't ask what happened when I mentioned he should use it as his battle cry.)

" What's up, doc?"

(First of all, Ratchet does not like to be called 'doc'.)

(Second of all, he does not like redundant questions and I knew he was calling me into the med bay for a check up.)

(Third, eating food in the med bay is strictly prohibited, especially when you're intentionally trying to make a mess.)

(Fourth, Ratchet still hasn't forgiven me for the Oscar the Grouch comment.)

(Add it all together, my carrot got confiscated and I got wrenched.)

(Again.)

(Shocker.)

Good? Bad? Yes? No? Funny? Voldshtein? Any ideas for what other rules to do? If you have some, leave a comment, and, unless you think the idea would be absolutely perfect for a certain girl, don't leave an OC name beside it. I'll decide what rule goes to whom. Yes, I'm a control freak like that. :)