Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters from the book.

Thanks so much for reviewing the first chapter! Yeah I know, please brace yourselves. It's going to be a bumpy emotional roller coaster ride. Special thanks to: Twilightistotallyawesome- Please don't forget to breath this time! lol!

peaceloveandedward- Lol, you will find out soon enough! Argh i can't give away anything!!

Luvntwilight- I'm glad the sequel is being continued too!!

edwardandbellabelong2gether- Thanks for the review!

aglblsm- Don't know what to say, you rock! lol thanks for reviewing!

Black blood666- Hope this doesn't disappoint you :0)

Rachelandthecupcakecrusades- Wohoo! Thanks for R&R

edward-luver961- Bella's going to die...lol just playing! or am I?

Losing Grip

Part 2

September 17

Something is not right. I can feel it. I don't know what it is, but everybody is acting really weird. Well the Cullens and the Hales are. I know that there's something Edward is not telling me. I can feel it.

Everything started getting weird after the day of my birthday. During school its even weirder. Edward is always busy, or off somewhere doing something. The only time he was free was during lunch time and even then he would strike up a conversation with Mike Newton about cars.

It's almost as if he was avoiding me. But why would he avoid me? We've been doing fine lately.

Today wasn't any better. He came to pick me up in the morning. The car felt cold somehow, as if an invisible line had been drawn between us. His silence was driving me crazy. But when I turned to speak to him, I realized that we were already on the school grounds.

I pursed my lips and hopped out of the car. He held my hand but did not look at me. Usually I would have enjoyed that, but my paranoid self was going three hundred miles per hour.

Maybe someone died….

Maybe Aliens stole his brain and made him in to a zombie

Maybe he likes somebody else

Maybe he's sick of me….

Similar thoughts kept going in and out of my head as I watched his pensive face. Then as if he just noticed I was there, he turned around and stared at me blankly. I looked at him expectantly. "Are you okay?" I asked him. Edward shook his head as if warding off a train of thought.

"Yeah I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" he said in a calm voice. To others he might look normal, but once you've spent everyday with someone over the course of three months, then you tend to get to know what makes them tick, and Edward didn't look alright to me.

I opened my mouth to say something but Edward had kissed my cheeks and headed towards his own locker. He was fast, but I will find out!…Somehow.

Rather sulkily I ended up walking slowly towards my locker. Glaring at random freshmen every now and then. I yanked my locker open then busily started stuffing things inside. I didn't notice the twins approach, so when I felt a hand cover my mouth, I instantly did what any normal person would do. I bit whoever had their hands on my mouth.

I heard a grunt, then a different laughing voice. I turned around to find Sean doubled up on a crouching form, swearing uncontrollably while Sam laughed hysterically. I looked at Sean and felt guilty instantly.

"Oh my god…Are you okay?" I asked nervously. I approached Sean slowly, but he sprung up so suddenly that I let out a yelp. I didn't feel like putting up with their shenanigans so early in the morning.

I rolled my eyes and held two hands up in the air. "What is wrong with you?!" I said loudly, my voice echoing through out the hall way. We had captured the attention of some students, some people were milling around us.

"Whoa Bells, you got your period or something? Why are you acting so anal?" Sam said coolly. I turned bright red instantly. I narrowed my eyes at them, mentally burning holes through their skulls. With a haughty huff I walked away.

I know, I'm never usually like that, but the twins can bring out a different side of me. You know, the side that wants to hunt them down and kill them! Well I headed towards English where I was in the same class as Alice.

Knowing this I felt relief somehow. Because I knew that I was finally going to get my answers. But you know what? Not so much!

I took the East Wing and started heading down our English room. I could see Alice standing outside of the classroom talking to some people. As soon as she saw me an unfathomable look crossed her face before she masked it with her cheerful smile.

I walked suspiciously towards her. She didn't seem to realize my mood though since as soon as I got close enough, she started chattering on non-stop, never letting me have any say. So that's how it's going to be…

I fell quiet the rest of the lesson, my head wandering off some place else. I vaguely caught on what Mr. Mason was saying about Macbeth, but for a good ninety nine percent of the time, my head was on cloud nine.

When the bell finally went I quickly jumped out of my seat. I ran towards my locker. Usually Edward would be leaning on my locker, his long limbs relaxed against the metal doors. But not today, I sadly noted. I could feel a bitter taste forming in my mouth.

I knew I needed to relax, but Edward's behaviour was beginning to really get to me.

I started walking towards the cafeteria. Crossing my fingers, hoping to God that he was there waiting for me. When I opened the door, my eyes zeroed in on the spot we usually sat. It was painfully empty. I looked around, people started looking at me.

I looked at Jessica Stanley holding a small tub of yoghurt, she had a smirk on her face as she looked at me. She looked away, I started to feel uncomfortable. Somehow I started to feel like people were either laughing at me, or they felt sorry for me.

I tried to clear my head and I continued walking towards the usual table just in case Edward or Alice decided to show up. I looked around the cafeteria once more to check, but even Jasper was painfully absent.

I sat on the chair, feeling horribly left out. Whatever Edward was doing, I'm sure he had a good reason not to show up during lunch time. I let out a deep breath before munching on my sandwich. I winced slightly when my mouth dug in to the bread. I opened the sandwich and scoffed. Peanut Butter.

I know! That's what you get for letting Charlie make your lunch…urgh! I put down the sandwich. I reverted to staring in to space once again that I failed to notice the twins for the second time.

"Hey Bella" said Sam.

"Watchu doin?" added Sean.

"Watchu eating?" Sam prodded.

"Can I have some?" Sean asked, wrapping an arm around my shoulder.

I let out a sigh. "Don't you have better things to do?" I said in a tired voice. The twins shrugged. "Like what?" Sam said, his blonde fringe falling over his left eye.

"Oh I don't know, go bother Mike or something" I said distractedly.

The twins looked at each other, their casual faces turning in to one of mischief. "Alright, since you told us to. You're being held responsible to whatever happens to Mike!" they both said in unison before disappearing. Bella opened her mouth to say something, but they were both gone.

I let out a sigh. I was about to go back to staring in to spaces when I saw an Alice-like figure. I automatically stood up and followed Alice. I saw her go inside the library. My eyes widened. It was our own little spot whenever we wanted to avoid somebody.

I felt annoyance creeping up as I followed her inside. Predictably enough, I found her hiding behind the classical literature area where works by Jane Austen were stashed.

She jumped slightly when she saw me approaching. She instantly looked around. I smiled. This section was the end, the only way out was past me. I stalked towards Alice as questions after questions started forming in my head. But out of all questions, the first thing that came out of my mind was, "Why are you and Edward avoiding me?" I said in a low voice. We were both quiet for a moment before Alice looked guiltily at me.

"I know! I'm sorry Bella, but I'm not allowed to say anything. I'm not at liberty to say anything…Edward will tell you in time…" she started. She started edging away from me. I knew that hurt was etched across my face as I stared at Alice's guilt ridden face.

"Look…Just take it easy okay?" she said in a small voice, as if she was letting me down gently. "I gotta…go" she said, throwing her hand up to a half wave. I don't know, but those words felt loaded somehow. I felt a shiver running up and down my arms, something's really wrong.

I tried to erase nasty thoughts that kept entering my head as I headed towards Biology. Edward couldn't get away from me that easily, especially since we're both in the same biology class.

But I should have known better. When I entered the room his beauty caught me off guard as usual. But there was something different about him. He looked stoic…too stoic. I sat down next to him. He must have heard the chair move because he turned to me. He had on a…sad smile for some absurd reason.

I smiled brightly back at him. I moved closer, I didn't say anything. I enjoyed the two minutes we had together before the teacher walked in. I closed my eyes and leaned against his shoulders.

He was brushing my his with his fingers, leaving me feeling caressed. When I opened my eyes he was looking at me intently. He was staring at me with a mixture of guilt….hatred?…and adoration? I wasn't sure, but right at that moment I didn't want to say anything. He looked fragile somehow. His green eyes was a beautiful warm pool that made me feel a little too ecstatic.

As we were staring at each other, it seemed like my body came to mutual understanding with his, which didn't make any sense at all. I pulled my gaze away from his. We sat there quietly throughout the whole lesson. I could feel his intense gaze on me more than once, but not once did I look back.

I don't understand why I acted that way, but there's just no turning back. I waited for the lesson to end before turning towards Edward. He wasn't looking anymore so I stood up and walked slowly, slow enough so he could catch up. But he never came level with me. When I turned around he was no where to be seen.

I sighed loudly and walked on towards my locker. I opened the locker, taking whatever I needed before slamming it shut. I walked out of the school and stopped abruptly when I saw Edward waiting for me in front of his silver Volvo. Despite the bad feeling inside my stomach, I sucked in his presence and smiled broadly.

Seeing him waiting made hope spring out, but hope instantly died as soon as I stepped inside the comfort of his car. As he reversed and accelerated out of the car park I felt the invisible wall once again.

I could feel a rift between the two of us. I felt the need to cry, but if I did that would have been too ridiculous.

An uncomfortable silence filled the air. I wanted to flinch badly, but I couldn't. I knew if I made even one move, he would notice it straight away. Several times I had wanted to start a conversation with him but I couldn't pluck up enough courage to do it.

It's getting rather ridiculous. He's suppose to be my boyfriend! But we are practically acting like strangers! I stared out of the window, ignoring the heavy feeling that was starting to settle inside the deepest caves of my heart.

I felt nausea starting from the pits of my stomach, raging up to my throat as I saw the house come to view. I felt a sense of desperation as I looked towards Edward. I continued looking at Edward, wanting him to look back at me and when he did the warm green pools that were his eyes suddenly froze over.

His face was composed as he waited for me to get out of his car. "Edward?" I said softly, twirling the mini wolf charm that I was wearing around my fingers. Edward frowned at the bracelet before looking back up at me.

"What's up?" his velvet voice didn't sound cold. However I could hear a certain edge to his tone. "Um…Will you…" I began, but broke off. I don't even know why I was asking for it, but I needed something to reassure me. "Will you…Kiss me?" I said in a tiny voice. Looking at him intently. His cold expression turned to surprise. He was even more taken aback as I started leaning closer to him.

His face looked like it was contorted in pain, but I didn't care. I closed my eyes and let my head get closer to him. Another heart beat later I felt the heat of the familiar lips touching mine.

My heart began thumping erratically as I held his face. Another minute later Edward lost control. He was kissing me like we were the last people on Earth and he was about to abandon me. I pushed the feeling of dread as I got lost in his kisses.

The kiss frightened me. I didn't know what to make of it.

One thing was for sure though; Edward still loved me. At least at the very moment our lips met I had no doubt. However now that I'm on my own in bed, I can't help the dreadful feelings from rising back up on the surface once again.

Uhh..Wait, is that pebbles being thrown at my window?

No, no, I must be imagining things.

Uh…Okay I definitely didn't imagine that… there it goes again. I'll be right back, I'm going to check it out.

September 19

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September 20

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September 21

Have you ever had that dream where you're sinking in quicksand and suddenly you're living underwater? That's how I feel right now. Wow, actually another way to describe me at this very moment would be a train wreck.

I'm a downright mess right now. I don't know how I'm still breathing. Heck, when I said that I was coming back two days ago, I didn't expect things to turn out so screwed up…

I had gotten off the bed, I was heading towards the window. I flung it open and gasped when I saw Edward standing by the tree he usually climbed on to get to my room. I gave him a puzzled look. "Why are you there? Why don't you come up?" I whisper yelled.

"No Bella, we need to talk. Come down!" he said in a hush voice. After hearing that sentence, I knew. Nothing good was going to come out of our little chat.

I tiptoed down the stairs, making sure not to wake Charlie. Luckily on my part I didn't trip at all. I slid out of the house and followed Edward who was jumping inside his Volvo. But when I was about to get inside his car he stopped me.

"Uh no Bella, actually bring your own car" that's all he said. I didn't question him as I jumped inside my truck. My stomach was doing multiple somersaults as I started up my truck.

The drive felt long as I followed Edward's headlights. I instantly recognised the path leading up to the meadow.

I saw Edward get out of the silver Volvo. He waited patiently for me as I tried to park my car next to his. He held the door open for me and took my hand. We started walking through the trail. It was already dark, with only the stars from the sky lighting up our way. After a while the silence started getting to me.

I abruptly stopped walking and so did Edward. "What's going on?" I said in an uncertain voice. I stared at Edward's beautiful face, trying to read him. His green gaze were else where. He took a deep breath before looking down at me.

The eyes were frozen cold once again as he stared at me. Curiosity took over as I waited for him to say whatever he wanted to say. He was looking at me coolly.

"Carlisle's been offered a job in Alaska…" he started, his voice sounded far away. I nodded, a sign he obviously took as encouragement. "And he took it. Everyone's moving to Alaska…" he said slowly. He averted his eyes somewhere else, he was avoiding my gaze.

I nodded once again. "That's okay, you'll miss them, I'm sure you'll be fine on your own" I started. He was looking at me with a peculiar expression. We were both quiet for a moment, a pregnant silence hanging above us.

"Bella…I'm going" Edward said in a low voice. I had looked at him with confusion, I honestly didn't get what he was talking about. "Where?" I said in a tiny voice. Edward looked at me, his face was screwed up in to a pained expression that disappeared faster than when it came.

"Bella…I'm moving to Denali with everyone…" he tried again. He was looking at me patiently, as if waiting for what he was saying to finally sink in. I felt the pain from below my chest slowly creeping out as he stared at his green eyes, searching.

"You're…leaving? But-But…Why?" I whispered, my voice broke slightly. Edward looked at me with a weird expression on my face. "I have to, dad needs to be there, and I…want to be there" he said softly. I looked at his face trying to see if he was lying.

His steel gaze triggered the slow torturous crack forming from the base of my heart. "But what about us?" I said wounded, to my dismay he wasn't ruffled one bit.

He coughed loudly, his eyes travelling to my face. "Alaska is a fair way away Bella…I don't think I can do long distant relationships. Heck, you're the longest relationship I've ever had…I'm not sure I can go the distance…" he had looked down by this point. He was avoiding my eyes by all means.

I could hear the mental tearing inside of me as my heart burst out in to flames. "So you're breaking up…with…me?" my voice caught, I kept breaking off. I tried to push down the tears that were on the edge of pouring out.

I looked up to see Edward's beautiful face. He was nodding, an indication that what I said was indeed true. I wanted to say something…Anything…Anything at all that would convince him to stay with me forever. But my throat stayed blocked. I couldn't utter a single word.

I opened my mouth to say something but he spoke up before me. "Please…Be safe when I'm away. Don't do anything stupid…" he said softly. I looked up, his ice cold eyes had melted, hope sprung up then crushed when the cold steely look came back.

"Don't do it for me, I'm only worried about Charlie. Don't give him too much of a hard time" he bossed.

I should have done something. Thrashed about, anything at all that would keep him there. But like the useless loser that I was, I stayed frozen.

Edward kissed my forehead softly. I closed my eyes, I felt a single tear leak out from the side of one eye. I felt Edward leave, the place where he use to stand felt cold and empty. When I opened my eyes he was gone.

When I knew he was definitely gone, I let out all the pain that I was feeling and cried enough, wept enough for the whole world to know. I looked around me frantically, but all I could see were trees in the darkness.

I ran, I started running as fast as I could. maybe if I run fast enough, I'll catch up to him? I said to myself. But I knew all hope was lost. When I got to the car park Edward was already gone.

I had gone home in tears, Charlie had embraced me tightly, saying that Edward and I just needed to talk it out. I even decided to go to him the next day. But the sight that greeted me when I got to the Cullen's house broke my heart even more.

I walked towards the front door, pressed the doorbell, penetrating it, until I came close to breaking the whole thing. I just couldn't face up to the fact that the house was painfully empty. No laughing Emmett, and no bouncy Alice…Alice, even my so called best friend never said goodbye.

All of them were gone, while I was left behind with nothing but memories that's starting to haunt me, robbing me of sleep. And of course, my insane thoughts of what could have been and what probably would never be.

And it comes to be That the soothing

light at the end of your tunnel Is just a freight train

coming your way

-Metallica