So here I am again. Feeling slightly giddy. I woke up to reviews and story alerts and some kind soul who had made me a favorite author. I am humbled..and terrified. More it is.

Still no beta, still don't own Castle. All mistakes are my own. Tell me about them. I want to know.

The ride to the hospital was agonizingly slow despite Esposito pushing all safe limits of driving in New York City. Looking out the window he saw people continue about their daily business. A woman with too many shopping bags. A man arguing to some unknown person on the other side of a cell phone. A couple sitting at a bus stop. Kissing and laughing. Being a writer with a bit of a flare for romance that last scene would usually have warmed his heart. He would have pointed it out to Kate. Raised an eyebrow, shot her a cocky grin. She would have rolled her eyes at him and directed him back to the task at hand. But not today. Didn't they know that one of New York's finest was waging a war against time? Didn't they care that without Kate Beckett in the city, it would be a little less safe to go to bed at night? He expected a parting of the Red Sea, he expected a motorcade and traffic diversions. Instead his heart rate sped up every time the ambulance in front of them had to slow down to cross a red light or blare it's horn at some oblivious jay-walker.

Pulling up the the hospitals emergency bay, he jumped out of the car and rushed over to where the paramedics were hurrying her inside. A flurry of activity ensued. Shouts of vitals that he didn't or maybe just couldn't in his current state of duress understand. He saw her wheeled through a set of gleaming, stainless steel double doors. Her father was holding her hand; he had a pained expression on his face. Rick felt a stab of guilt. He hadn't even thought about Kate's father at the cemetery. He had promised to take care of her and had failed. Miserably. He wanted to follow her but a gruff looking nurse in ridiculously perky looking 'Care Bear' scrubs grabbed his arm and halted him.

"I'm sorry Sir, you can't go through there. Family only. The waiting area is on the third floor if you would like to go on up."

Her stern look brokered no arguments. He scanned the lobby area. Saw her medics leaving. He ran after the nearest one, an older man with kind looking eyes who had given him a comforting nod of the head as they left the cemetery. Melvin. That's what his name tag said.

"Please, how is she? They won't tell me anything. They won't let me see her."

The older man sighed, obviously this wasn't strictly protocol. "It was touch and go for a bit back there. Her vitals dropped dangerously low and she was in and out of consciousness. She called out a few times. Always and apples." Rick smiled despite himself. "Didn't make much sense. She is in the best care here though Sir, focus on that. Pray for her. Go find your family." The medics radio sparked to life and with a warm pat on the shoulder he briskly walked away.

Rick made his way to the elevator, a song was playing. Cherish, by The Association.

Cherish is the word I use to describe,
All the feeling that I have hiding here for you inside,
You don't know how many times I've wished that I had told you,
You don't know how many times I've wished that I could hold you,
You don't know how many times I've wished that I could mold you into someone who could cherish me as much as I cherish you...

Rick snorted. How fitting. He brushed a tear away as the elevator dinged three. He took a deep breath and rushed into the waiting arms of his mother and daughter. They bombarded him with questions as they ushered him to the waiting room. How is she. Did you see the shooter. Are you okay? I love you Daddy. Richard darling, I'm so sorry. He sat down in a bank of uncomfortable chairs. It reminded him of an airport lobby. Row upon row of linked, plastic chairs. People with faraway looks on their faces. Avoidance of eye contact. A hint of stale coffee and the the stench of harsh cleaning chemicals. When he traveled he usually found comfort in these things. He made up stories in his head about where they were going, who they were seeing. Elaborate plots and happy endings. He thought to himself that he may never fly commercial again. Carbon footprint be damned, Alexis, he thought with a hint of a smile. That smell though, those faces would forever remind him now of pain and uncertainty. The wait stretched on and on. Punctuated by offers of coffee, pats on the hand, knowing looks from Kate's father. He thought back to the night of the dirty bomb. He was going to tell her that night. As the clock ticked down and they gazed into each others eyes for what they thought was the last time, a strange sense of peace had come over them. How can this be happening? At least we are going out together. Always. I love you. It was that last phrase running through his mind, her eyes, that had jolted him into action. Made him pull those wires in what was quite possibly his most stupid move ever. Back at the precinct over beers and banter, Javier had said they didn't know how lucky they were and they had shared another look. Out in the hallway he was ready to take his chance. He'd seen Josh walking towards them and his heart had sunk. Another missed opportunity.

Josh..

Richard Castle was an honorable man. And so, with a heavy heart he raised himself from his plastic seat, made an excuse about needing air and went out in search of Kate's beau. Josh would want to know. He had stayed home during that dirty bomb case. He had obviously loved Kate. Kate has wanted for it to have a chance. Wanted to make it work. Richard Castle hadn't heard much about him lately but figured if the shoe was on the other foot he would want to be there. Kate deserved to be happy even if she didn't know it was with him yet. He made his way up to the nurses station and asked where the Cardiology wing was.

And so, the story continues. Still a bit purposeless. Still have no idea where I'm going with it. I hope you are still enjoying it.