AN: This is the conversation between Catherine and Ryan.

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds. Catherine Jareau and Samuel Ryan are mine.

Maybe who we are isn't so much about what we do,

but rather what we're capable of when we least expect it.

- Jodi Picoult

Friday July 9th, 2004

Normally I like Fridays because Friday is the last day of the week that Jen and I have to spend at the BAU. Jen loves work and I cannot begrudge her for that, but I hate being surrounded by people, especially people I don't know. It makes me feel sick, I hate that they stare and brush up against me. Friday's mean that I get Jen to myself for just over sixty hours, but not this Friday. This Friday, tonight, we are going to have a family dinner. We were supposed to have a family barbeque last weekend for the Fourth of July, but the team was called out on a case on June 28th, and didn't return until last night.

This was the second case Jen's team has been called out on since I started living with my big sister. The first time Jenny went away on a case and left me behind was horrible, but this time was somehow more difficult to deal with. Logically I know that it was worse because Jenny was gone for so long without proper contact and since they left in the middle of the night, I didn't even get a chance to say a proper good-bye. When Jenny is gone, we're supposed to be in contact through Penelope, which means a phone call to say good night, but preferably Skype, or whatever program Penelope has built for the team. The team was based somewhere in Houston, and that was fine for communication but when they had to go outside the city limits for something, I don't know what, Jenny and Spencer were out of touch for two days.

This one was really bad; the team was gone for ten days. Jen says that is unusual, usually they can catch the unsub faster. I stayed at Penelope's apartment while Jenny was away in Houston, Texas. Even the idea of sleeping on a couch for nine nights does not make my list of the top 100 fun things to do while visiting Jennifer. Waking up to my screaming wasn't Penelope's idea of fun either. I do feel kind of bad about that, she was forewarned but apparently Penelope didn't take Jenny seriously concerning my nightmares.

Although, I'm pretty sure she won't be making that mistake again. Especially since Penelope and I switched back to Jen's apartment for the last three nights and I didn't wake her up with my screaming. The nightmares were still present but I woke up crying instead and I don't think Penelope heard me. I was also a little calmer during the day after sleeping in Jenny's bed. Going to the BAU and spending the day with Penelope and not Jenny was weird. Jenny's office was locked up tight, but Penelope has an extra key and she lent it to me so that I could hide in Jenny's office when it got to be too much.

They finally caught the guy and got a confession. Somehow Jenny managed to get everyone home that same night, but I wish they had left Ryan behind. Maybe a family dinner isn't what everyone needs right now. I personally think all of us need more sleep, because everyone is exhausted, which means everyone is grumpy, and Ryan in particular has been more venomous than usual. He's a jerk. I know that and I am used to his biting words but there was no need for him to tell me to drop dead when I walked past his desk to visit Spencer.

Jenny has kicked me out of her office because she has a phone consult with some detective and doesn't want me to overhear any of the gory details. I think my sister is being silly, it's not like I can't see this stuff on television, but when Jenny tells me that she is trying to protect me, I give in. Both because it is easier than fighting and I know just how desperately Jenny has been trying to shield me throughout my childhood. I want Jenny to think she has been doing a good job, that I'm still oblivious to the ways of the world.

I visit with Penelope for a few minutes. She is almost ready to leave and sends me off in the direction of Aaron and Mr. Gideon, because they are the two most likely to forget our family dinner tonight. I take the back hallway instead of going around and crossing through the bullpen where Ryan should be right now. I walk through the round-table room, where Jen's team has their case briefings and out the door onto the catwalk. I take a quick look into Mr. Gideon's office, and sigh in relief when he isn't there. I know that it isn't right, but he still makes me a little nervous.

I see Samuel Ryan walking across the bullpen towards Aaron's office, so I turn back and take a few quick steps back in the direction of the conference room. I manage to make it all the way past the doorway before Ryan ambushes me.

"What are you doing up here you little monster?" he asks harshly.

I look up at him but refuse to make eye contact; I fix my eyes on a point just over his shoulder instead. I answer in a calm voice that belies my internal terror, "I'm looking for Aaron and Mr. Gideon. We're supposed to leave for dinner soon."

Ryan positions himself in front of me, backing me up into the door. Then he grabs my arm tightly; his fingers are going to leave a bruise.

"Stop it!" I snap, "You're hurting me."

He smirks and places his free hand gently at the base of my neck, "I don't have to. No one is going to stop me."

False bravado kicks in. I glower at him, "It is no wonder why no one likes you. You are a bully Samuel Ryan. Why don't you pick on someone your own size? I'm a fourteen-year-old girl; you are a thirty-seven year old man. I weigh less than a third of what you do. What possible danger could I present to you that would cause you to act like this?"

He growls at me, "You don't know anything, you're a child. You shouldn't even be here. JJ should leave you at home by yourself. Maybe you'll burn the apartment complex down and save us all the trouble of babysitting you."

I don't know where my confidence comes from but I roll my eyes, "I wouldn't ever let you babysit me." I smile sweetly up into his face, "You're right about me being a child though, but I will eventually grow up. You, on the other hand, are an asshole and cannot possibly out-grow that." I stomp on his foot and kick his shin for good measure when he doesn't let go.

The fingers resting at the base of my neck twitch, "You just assaulted a federal officer," Ryan growls at me, "I could have you arrested. I could arrest you myself."

I raise an eyebrow, "And what will you tell the rest of the team? How will you explain your actions?"

"You're a feral little monster," he snarls, "You attacked me without provocation."

I want to laugh, but that would provoke him further, so I don't, "I'm pretty sure the bruising on my arm will tell a different story. Look around Ryan, everyone is watching you." And indeed they are. Derek has moved from his desk up onto the catwalk and stopped a few feet away. Aaron's head is sticking out of his office and Spencer is standing up at his desk, watching through the conference room windows. Derek looks ready to intervene on my behalf again, but it is unnecessary, I can handle Ryan.

Ryan removes his hand from the base of my neck and glances at Derek before turning back to me, "This is the second time you've attacked me unprovoked. I will not let there be a third time."

I look at him fiercely. I imagine that my eyes are probably turning an icy grey the way Jenny says they do when I am angry, "Nor will I, because I swear to God that I will never allow you to get this close to me again."

Ryan steps back. Then he walks into the round-table room and closes the door, his glare follows me all the way down into the bullpen.

I scoot past Derek who is still standing speechless on the catwalk and make it all the way down to Spencer's desk in the bullpen.

I spit out viciously, "Ich hasse Ihn," I hate him and kick the dividing wall between Spencer's desk and the empty one on the other side.

"What did you say?" asks Derek.

I jump slightly, "Nothing."

"Are you alright Princess?" he asks cautiously.

Spencer doesn't say anything. He just stares at me with sad eyes.

My voice is quiet but firm, "I'm fine Derek."

Derek tries again, "What did Ryan say?"

I cross my arms, "I don't want to talk about it."

Jenny walks into the bullpen and zeros in on me, "Are you okay Kitty Cat?"

I sigh, "I'm fine Jenny."

Derek glowers, "No she's not, she just had some sort of confrontation with Ryan."

Jenny looks at me with one eyebrow raised, "Catherine is that true?"

I huff in frustration, "Yes, but I'm fine Jenny. Really."

Spencer is still watching me carefully.

Jenny looks at me and then she looks at Spencer. Her lips curl into a small smile, "Alright, I'll let it go for now. I'm going back to my office to pick up a few things and then we can go." Jen turns to Derek and smiles sweetly, "Derek would you like to accompany me?" It is not really a question, more of a request, or even a demand, but Derek gives in and follows my big sister out of the bullpen.

"Come on Kitty Cat," whispers Spencer, "I'll walk you down to the parking lot. JJ and the rest of the team can meet us there."

I look up at him in confusion, "Okay Spence."

I wait for Spencer to finish putting his files away and grab his messenger bag. Then we walk out of the bullpen to the elevators in comfortable silence. We wait in uneasy silence and descend to the parking lot in awkward silence.

After we reach Jenny's car, Spencer is the one to break the almost oppressive silence, "You so know that Ryan has just been uninvited to dinner right?"

I blink, "Huh?"

Spencer continues, "Ryan attacked you for no reason. That means he's no longer family, so he can't come to family dinner."

"I don't want to break up your family."

Spencer smiles at me, "You haven't. Ryan did it all by himself. Besides, you're family too, and between the two of us, you're more welcome than Ryan is."

I blush, "Thanks Spence."

"Catherine," he says warily, "May I please see your arm?"

I frown, "Why do you want to see my arm Spencer?

He tilts his head to the left, "I just want to make sure Ryan didn't hurt you."

I lie, "He didn't Spencer."

"Please?" he asks, his voice cracking.

I narrow my eyes; "You can't just take my word for it?"

"I saw the way he was gripping your arm Kitty Cat," Spencer looks so worried that I can't say no.

I sigh in defeat, "Fine." I push my cardigan off my shoulder so that Spencer can get a quick glimpse of my upper arm.

Spencer frowns at the dark purple handprint sized bruise on my arm before his eyes dart back up to my neck and he winces.

I straighten my t-shirt, which had slipped down a bit exposing the red mark at the base of my throat, then I right my sweater. I whisper harshly, "You can't tell Jenny."

"Catherine," he protests.

I cross my arms, "Promise me Spencer."

He frowns, "What use is there in keeping a secret? Won't JJ notice anyway?"

I shrug, "Probably, but you can't tell her."

Spencer is baffled, "Why are you protecting him?"

I look away, "He's an ass, but he's still a good agent. The next person who comes along might be worse than him. It's better to know the evil you are dealing with than to face the next unknown evil."

"Catherine," he sighs in exasperation.

I scowl at him, "Don't you dare say anything Spencer Reid."

Spencer frowns, "I won't say anything to JJ."

"Or the rest of the team," I say, needing to cover all the bases.

Spencer groans but gives in to my demands, "Or the rest of my team."

I sigh in relief.

Spencer takes a step forward and wraps his arms around me.

I stiffen at his touch. I try not to panic at the physical contact and to regulate my breathing.

Spencer whispers into my hair, "I won't let him near you ever again Kitty Cat. I promise."

When I hear that, I know that Spencer just wants to protect me. It takes me a minute or two, but I calm down and return Spencer's hug.

We believe in ordinary acts of bravery,

in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another.

- Veronica Roth

AN2: So what do you think of Ryan? Meeting Ashley Seaver will be posted on July 29, 2012.