Day One
BRAINIAC FIVE
"Message for Brainiac Five."
Brainy glanced up from his latest project, frowning in irritation. "COMPUTO, identify sender."
"Question mark, question mark, question mark."
Brainy frowned. "Repeat that."
"Question mark, question mark, question mark."
Brainy sighed. "Probably another advertisement for magnetic pulse converters. COMPUTO, display message."
The computer screen to the right of Brainiac Five flickered on and a simple text message appeared.
My Dearest Querl, it read, You don't know me, but I desperately want to know you. I think you are the most amazing person in the universe. You are my hero! Forever yours, ???.
Brainy stared blankly at the screen for 3.225 seconds. Then he groaned and dropped his head on the lab table, sending minuscule components and tools skittering across the flat surface. "I knew it," he grumbled. "The first article they write, and I've already got a fan…punctuation." he sighed heavily. "Rokk has hundreds of fangirls sending him messages, ever since his article in the Legion Insider…This is a disaster! I'll never get any work done! COMPUTO, erase message."
"Message erased."
"Good. Let's hope that's the end of it." Brainy went back to work, gathering up the scattered components and tools. "Just because he answers six hundred messages a month does not mean I need to invoke the same courtesy." Brainy smirked. "Besides, if I don't answer, perhaps this 'triple question mark' will not attempt to contact me again."
Three hours later, Brainy was still at an impasse with his work-- it wouldn't go together the way he wanted it to, and it wanted him to leave it alone. Brainy was about to get up and find a different project when COMPUTO spoke again.
"Message for Brainiac Five."
Brainy sighed. "COMPUTO, Identify sender."
"Question mark--"
"COMPUTO, erase message." Brainy sighed.
"Authorization code?" COMPUTO prompted, requiring a password if Brainy was going to delete the message without reading it. Ever since the Coluan had taken to deleting Cosmic Boy's messages about lab funding, the Legion had decided to require an authorization code before you could delete a message without reading it. Of course, Brainy evaded being discovered of ignoring funding complaints by deleting the message and then having COMPUTO delete any record of the message. At the present, however, the rule was still in effect.
"Alpha beta six six three five one two five four alpha; erase message," Brainy said dismissively.
"Message erased." COMPUTO said.
Brainy sighed, setting down what he'd been working on and moving across the lab to examine a different project.
The door swished open. "Hey Brainy, thought you might want to read this," Cosmic Boy said. "It's the latest edition of the Legion Insider."
Brainy sighed. "I don't want to see it. I had hoped they wouldn't publish the article."
Cosmic Boy frowned. "Then why did you give them an interview?"
"I didn't," Brainy replied. "I sent them a diminutive anecdote of 'a day in the life', a holo-vid expressing my regrets that I could not meet with them, and that I preferred privacy to publicity."
Cosmic Boy glanced down at the article. "Really? That's all you did? They seem to have a lot of… information."
Brainy rolled his eyes. "Pure extrapolation, and heavy amounts of exaggeration, I'm sure. Don't tell me you actually went to an interview before they wrote your article."
"They seemed nice enough; they even treated me to lunch," Cosmic Boy replied. "Besides, they weren't hurting anything."
"No, they were simply providing all the adolescent females on New Metropolis with yet another heartthrob to swoon over," Brainy replied dismissively, moving across the lab to check on yet another project. "I completely understand how your stomach could be bribed to do away with your dignity."
Cosmic Boy frowned. "Brainy…"
"If you're satisfied now, I have work to do," Brainy said, signaling the end of the conversation.
"Tactical retreat," Cosmic Boy muttered, glancing at the article. He sighed gustily and shook his head at the Coluan. "Okay, Brainy, you win. I'm leaving."
"Good," Brainy said. "I abhor interruptions when I am working."
"Yeah, yeah… and how much does this stuff cost? We can't afford--"
"Rokk," Brainy snapped, "get out."
Cosmic Boy sighed in irritation and left the Coluan to his work.
"Message for Brainiac Five."
Brainy growled in frustration and hurled a piece of valuable equipment to the floor. "COMPUTO, identify sender."
"Ques--"
"COMPUTO, erase message, authorization code alpha beta six six three five one two five four alpha."
Brainy sighed, running a hand through his hair. That is the fourteenth message today, he thought grimly. Good thing night is falling-- hopefully this errant punctuation…person… will find a more meaningful existence. Preferably sooner than later. Glancing down, Brainy bent over and picked up the piece of equipment. "It appears to be undamaged," he said to himself. "Good." He tossed it onto a nearby counter and moved to the door.
"Message for Brainiac Five."
"COMPUTO, erase message, authorization code alpha beta six six three five one two five four alpha." Brainy said, slamming his palm on the counter. "When will this triple question mark figure out that I don't want to hear from whoever they are?" he snapped, glaring at the computer, daring it to answer him.
"Message for--"
"COMPUTO! DO NOT INFORM ME OF ANY MORE MESSAGES UNTIL TOMORROW MORNING!" Brainy shouted, then stomped out of the lab.
Chameleon Boy sat on the couch, staring helplessly at a blank computer screen. "Do you think Brainy got my message about this thing not working?"
Triplicate Girl reached over Bouncing Boy and patted him on the shoulder. "Don't worry, I'm sure he's coming," she frowned. "COMPUTO, where is Brainiac Five?"
"Currently, Brainiac Five is in his room attempting to sleep."
Chameleon Boy slouched in the couch. "Great. He's too tired to fix it, then."
Bouncing boy frowned in confusion. "It shouldn't take too long, though. Usually he doesn't mind, if whatever we want doesn't take long. I wonder…" Bouncing Boy stroked his chin. "COMPUTO, did Brainiac Five receive Chameleon Boy's message?"
"Affirmative," COMPUTO said.
"And then what did he do?" Bouncy asked.
"Brainiac Five erased the message," COMPUTO replied, "And left for his room."
"COMPUTO, did he even look at the message?" Triplicate Girl asked, sounding confused.
"Negative."
"He must be mad at me for laughing at him," Chameleon Boy moaned, slouching deeper into the couch. "Maybe I should go and grovel at his door."
"Don't worry, he'll get over it," Bouncing Boy assured him.
A/N: Urrr... I almost feel like Brainy is OOC... and it's bothering me... sigh. I hate Cos again. I liked him in the comics, but then I saw S2's "Karate Kid" and I decided I hated him again. I don't usually hate people, but in this case I decided to make an exception... Plus, I just watched Dark Victory, and I looooooved it! (I am, after all, the dramatic tension/emo/inner battles lover...) I think I talked to the characters through half of the episode... This is the third time I've watched it, the first time I only saw the middle of part 2-- (urk), and the second time, for some reason it all loaded perfectly... BUT WITHOUT SOUND. Did anyone know that the only words you can lipread from animated characters during "Dark Victory" are "Brainy" "Brainiac Five" and "Room"?.... Back to the point. (Is there a point?) I watched Dark Victory, and decided my favorite part is when the Supes say "Brainy may not be human, but he has the biggest heart"... after seeing "Edge of Tomorrow" (I think), that was just... ohhh! (Was it "Message in a Bottle"? I don't remember...)
I also liked Message in A Bottle because of my research I had to do on Colu for Document1278803-4576a... I knew immediately whose technology was in that shrink ray... ah, research. Speaking of which, anyone know ANYTHING about Brainy's history prior to his joining the Legion? If you have any resources, PLEASE, let me know. That's my next fic...
ah, I digress mucho. Thanks for sticking with me and my many plot bunnies!