Chapter 2 - A Whole New World
Immediately I was aware of the fact that I was no longer in hell. At least, if this was hell, there was no way I wanted to be anywhere else. I couldn't say that there was anything that I noticed first, per se. Because everything came to my attention at once. My eyes seemed to be looking on the most beautiful sight I'd ever seen. But at the same time, it was also nothing special, just a bunch of trees. But to say that it was 'just a bunch of trees' was clearly an understatement. The trees were … lovely. And there was so much one could say about them. Reaching up toward the sky above me were huge tree trunks. And they didn't give the impression that one would usually get from tree trunks. Gazing upon bark, one would usually come up with the overwhelming thought of roughness. And I didn't mean to say that the bark didn't look rough. It was just that I could see it in such detail that the overwhelming factor of it was every little crevice, insect, moss, and bit of sap was visible to me. And these things totally inhibited my ability to see the thing as a whole. So it didn't look rough. It looked … fascinating. And as I trailed my eyes farther and farther up a particular tree trunk to my right, I could still see every little detail, hundreds of feet above me.
At the very tops of the trees were leaves. Beautiful leaves. The most glorious thing I'd seen in my life now were leaves. The smallest veins running through them were clearly visible to me, even from way down here. There was no urge to stand up or crane my neck. Because there was no need to. I didn't need to squint or will my eyes to give me a clearer view, because my eyes could see literally everything. My hands were resting on something soft and silky. My peripheral vision registered it as moss. I remembered back to my endless time of burning where I had the vague thought that my hands were resting on sheets. I now realized that I had been wrong. It had been moss. It surprised me how soft it could be. The little leaf-like projections were so much smoother than even the finest silk that I'd ever felt. It was mind-blowing.
But the remembrance of my burning days brought something else to the forefront of my mind. I was still burning. Only in one part of my body to be sure, but the burning was there. My throat. The moment I thought of it, the burning suddenly became unbearable. Excruciatingly unbearable. My hands flew to my throat, trying to subdue the horror. There had to be something to quench the fire. Every fiber of my being began searching for something. Water, or something of the like. But there no sign of a creek of pool of water anywhere near. Just endless green moss and the brown trunks of trees. I stood suddenly, in one swift movement. And I forgot the burning for a moment. My act had been so fast. It was almost hard for me to follow the movement myself, even with these heightened senses. But this thought could not hold my attention for long, because at the back of my mind, I could still feel the burning. The burning! How could I stop it! I drowned in the horrific sensation. It was different from thinking of a vague pulling of some half-forgotten guilt while you were occupied with other things. It was like not being able to stop thinking of something, but being able to think of other things, at the forefront of action simultaneously. This duality amazed me, but the fire burned on.
What if he woke while I was away?
Someone had spoken. "Who's there?" I called out in a stressed voice. But it did not sound stressed. The tones of my words were low and flowing, like water running over smooth moss-covered stones. Or like the velvet of a woman's dress whooshing in the wind. I was so easily distracted. I had to focus now, someone was near, and he had to be able to help me.
Stop worrying and get to him, fast.
There it was again! I suddenly saw a trees fly by me on either side as if I was running. I was amazed by how I could still see every detail, even while they sped past me so quickly. But then I realized I was still standing here, in an instinctual crouched position, ready to attack whoever had spoken. What had that been? I hadn't been running. I recognized the exact spot I had woken up in. I hadn't gone anywhere. How had I been somewhere else so suddenly then? What had happened?
Almost there, just a few seconds. Then I'll see him. My companion.
There was a wave of emotion to the words. The person felt elation. Elation at the loss of loneliness. No, I couldn't possibly read that into his words. There I go again with my 6th sense. That doesn't seem to have changed about me. The dryness in my throat scorched on. But I had to stay here, I had to wait. Something wasn't letting me move at all.
Stop. There is breathing. No heartbeat… Edward?
"Edward?" the voice spoke to me.
No, I missed his awakening. How could I have been so selfish as to go hunting so close the three day mark? Stupid stupid stupid!
"How do you know my name?" I heard it then, a soft padding of feet upon ground. Someone was approaching.
Be slow about it, I don't want to scare him away.
"What are you talking about?" The words this man had been saying didn't make any sense.
I didn't say anything but his name. What does he mean?
"Why are you lying? You just said 'Be slow about it.' Don't tell me all you said was my name." I was getting angry, and fast. If I didn't get any answers fast, I'd be throwing a tantrum. Then, through the trees, I could see movement.
No, it can't be. I've created one with a gift? Mind-reading, so fascinating. Just like Aro … but long-distance it seems.
I didn't get it. There were no words. All I could sum it up as was: "What?" That was the primary thought pervading my mind, just 'What.' Then, I saw a body breaking through the trees. A man in a white coat. A doctor? How strange to see a doctor of all people coming through the greenery to meet me, saying things I didn't understand.
Then I saw his face, and recognition hit me. It wasn't just any doctor. It was the doctor. The doctor that had been tending to my father when he passed away. The doctor that had told my mother he would do everything in his power to save me. The doctor that had watched over me. And now, for some unfathomable reason, this doctor was here. Here with me. In this forest. Confusion swept over me. Where was I? Why was I here? Who was this doctor? Why did he say such confusing things? Why were my senses so heightened? How did I get cured? Why am I so different? What was the burning? Am I dead? What am I?
The last question scared me.
As I tried to remember his name, I realized something. It was hard to remember. I had never had this sensation before, this difficulty to remember. Was my intelligence deteriorating? I couldn't tell. What had I become?
Edward? Do you remember? I'm doctor Cullen. I treated your family.
Was he … thinking to me? What?
"What?"
"Edward." He finally spoke. His voice was so cautious, as if he was afraid that I'd pounce on him. Blasphemy … would I? I suddenly wasn't sure about anything. I didn't know if I was alive or dead. If I was dead, I didn't' know where I was. If I was alive, and I didn't know where I was. If I was alive, I didn't know what I'd become. What had I become? For I did not for one second believe that I could be any normal human anymore. I went over the facts in my head: I could not remember very clearly anything at all anymore, that wasn't a normal human trait was it? And I could see much, much more clearly than I had ever seen in my life. By some unfathomable reason, I seemed to be able to hear this doctor's thoughts. For some other crazy reason, I could hear his footsteps when he was so far away. For another unknown reason, everything that should have been grating was soft to me. And for some reason, my throat burned like I was still being licked by the flames of hell. I needed something, I just didn't know what it was. Water? But the thought of it did not bring me relief, I needed something else. Something … warm.
"Edward? I'm sorry, I know your throat must be burning. But I think we should … talk first, before we quench your … thirst."
"Thirst?" So it was a liquid I was craving. I had a bad feeling about this. For some reason, I didn't think that it was just a warm soup that would put out the fire.
"I've never had to explain this to someone before, seeing as I haven't ever … changed someone before."
I opened my mouth to spew confusion, but he stopped me.
Wait please, let me finish, and then I'll let you ask any questions.
I nodded to show that I understood his wishes, and would comply.
"I think … it would be best if I build up to the climax so that you don't … go into shock or something of the like. Not that I'm sure we can go into shock."
What did he mean… we? We were something different then, some other …. creature. I was starting to become disgusted with myself.
"So we'll start with obvious facts. Your sight is very clear, is it not?"
I nodded. "Extremely so, almost upsettingly so."
"Everything seems soft to you."
Again, I nodded.
"You do not have a heartbeat."
My eyes widened, shocked. I didn't have a heartbeat? I gently pressed two fingers to my wrist. Nothing. I moved my fingers to my throat. I pressed harder in frustration: nothing. I pulled my hand over my heart. Absolutely nothing. So then how did my body function? Oh … I was dead.
"I don't know how you'll take this. But …"
"I'm dead?" I interrupted him.
"No … You're … a vampire."
There was a deep silence. I couldn't hear him think. I couldn't hear the animals. I couldn't hear myself think either. It was just a long deep silence. And finally I spoke.
"I'm a … what?"
"A vampire… you feel the burn in your throat do you not? The legends of us creatures are not all true. We can go out into the daylight, that is if we didn't fear exposure. Because we … for lack of better explanation sparkle in the sunlight. We do feed on the blood of humans. But, I have found an alternative source of food: animal blood. We have all the human strengths, but enhanced. We can hear better, see better, run faster, exert strength better."
"Show me." I said, because there was nothing else to say. I would believe fully once I'd experienced it. I wasn't dead. I was a creature. I felt exhilarated. I wouldn't burn in hell forever.
"There are no humans for miles to entice you for the moment. You may choose yourself whether or not you want to follow my unique diet, I will not force animal blood upon you. Follow me." And then he took off.
I followed. It was quite easy. Amazingly easy. The trees flew by, but they didn't blur. They were perfectly clear to me. Every detail of every vein of every leaf of every tree was so perfectly clear to me. And I wasn't even really paying attention. I had my eyes trained on Dr. Cullen. He was hundreds of feet ahead, yet I could still see him through the thick of the trees. My eyes made up for the spaces blotched out of my view by the flora and fauna. I was partly afraid that I'd lose sight of him, and that I'd have to walk this world alone, not understanding myself fully.
But then again, I knew that I wouldn't lose him. I could tell, even now, that I was not putting on my full speed at all. I could run faster, I could run faster than Dr. Cullen even. The pace I was going at was just a leisurely pace. So I sped up, it didn't seem to take any more effort. I supposed, since I didn't have blood running through my veins, my muscles didn't have a means to get tired. But of course that would mean that my muscles couldn't logically work. But then again, logically, I shouldn't even exist.
Catch up Edward, you can do it. Just don't run past me just yet, I'd like to show you the way.
I ran just a little faster, coming up parallel to Dr. Cullen. I ran by his side, exhilarated at the speed. Speed was so wonderful! I could run like this forever and not want of anything else. Anything at all, because this feeling of the air whooshing around me without having to run out of energy or push my limit was wonderful! There was no other word to describe it. It was just absolutely wonderful.
Easy there Edward, we're almost there.
Where were we going? I had no idea, but I knew that it didn't matter where we went. It would all look just as beautiful. I wouldn't be surprised if dirt looked beautiful to me. There were so many colors, so many different shades. Everything was that much more vibrant. Even dead leaves looked so rich in texture and color. Pieces of dust flying in the air caught the light in the most interesting of ways. I looked up into the sky, and the sun shone down on me through breaks in the trees. My skin sparkled, white and scintillating in the light. Beautiful, like diamonds. My entire body could shine like diamonds. How interesting. I saw how the legends could have arisen from this anomaly. Sparkling skin. No … vampire could walk out into the sun among humans like his.
Vampire. The word sounded mysterious and powerful. Vampire. I was a vampire, a different species, a different creature. Vampire. We surpassed humans in every possible way. Vampire. We're like gods. The running was getting to my head.
Dr. Cullen was slowing now, and I noticed that the trees were thinning. I felt the moving of live away from me everywhere I went. I could feel animals scattering as we made our way through the forest. It phased me for a moment that they had this natural instinct to stay away from us. They were afraid of us, and rightly for we were better than they. We were the top of the food chain. Vampire. I like this. Vampire. I could get used to this. Vampire. I feel so … powerful.
Suddenly, we broke out into a field. I wide, vast field. It was beautiful. So very beautiful. My brain became tired of registering everything as beautiful, because now everything was. So why describe it as so, when it was a given? I looked at the glorious field that lay before me. To my human eyes, it would have seemed a normal field, but to me, now at least, no sight had surpassed this beauty. The lush green grass that seemed to spread on for miles covered the ground in its lively, vibrant beauty. But I could still see, far off in the distance there was the beginning of the forest again. As my eyes took in the perimeter, I saw that this clearing was cut in a nearly perfect circle inside the forest. There was a small pond in the center, and a herd of deer were drinking from it. They did not notice us. We were very quiet. Almost eerily so.
Would you like to drink from them?
"The deer?" I asked incredulously. I could smell them from here. They smelled just as unappetizing as the grass or the air around me. I did not want them. They would not quench my thirst.
Yes … the deer. It is your choice of course. I will not force you to do anything but…
He began to think of his reasons. And listening to him, I couldn't help but understand exactly where he was coming from. He did not want to hurt humans. He had been a human. They were the essence of us, they thought just like us. He thought of it as being a vegetarian. Humans who felt wrong in killing other animals resorted to eating only fruits and vegetables. But our did, apparently required blood, any kind of blood would sustain. And if any kind of blood would sustain, then why not take from those less closely related to us? Why not drink from the blood of animals, than from the blood of humans? It was logical. Of course, humans would taste much, much better. But what was life without a little hardship?
I had to agree. I saw the logicality in his thoughts, and there was no way that I was disagreeing with him. He had made me this creature, a vampire. And what else could I do other than to agree with him and follow the ways he wanted? He felt like a father and mentor to me already, even though I had practically just met him.
"I understand. I will try." Then I wrinkled my nose, because the deer really did smell entirely unappetizing.
Thank you.
"How do I…?" I was confused. I had not hunted before. This was sure to be a strange experience. I had no weapons, was I supposed to just hunt with my bare strength? Should I crouch like a cheetah or … what? I did not know how to do this.
"Show me … please."
He nodded his head in understanding, and then he took off. Before the deer could understand what had come upon them, Dr. Cullen had caught one between his hands. He put his mouth to the jugular vein and broke the skin, drinking. I saw every step of his quick movements. My eyes were able to follow quite precisely and I had confidence that I could copy him exactly. But I did not have much time. The deer were already scattered in horror and they were running off to toward the trees. I caught one just after it disappeared among the flora. It was a large buck. My first catch. I could hear its heart thumping in its chest, the flight or fight mechanism kicking into his system. The smell of it filled my nostrils, and I felt the burn in my throat blaze. It was suddenly so much more appetizing to me when I could hear the heart pumping blood and see the jugular vein throb with each pulse. Without pause, I lowered my head down to the nape of the buck's neck and sunk my teeth in.
It was the easiest thing to sink my teeth into him. I didn't even feel the skin break. I only knew when the rush of blood started rushing into my mouth. And I drank it all hungrily. It did not take long before I had drained him of his entire system. As he fell from my arms, I felt a slight pang at having taken a life. I had never done that before, killed something. Well unless of course mosquitoes were to be counted in my tally. The burning was not quenched per se, but it was better. I had to have another. Then the thirst would die, I was sure of it.
Minutes later, I stood with Dr. Cullen in the center of the clearing. Six deer lay before us. One, Dr. Cullen had taken. The rest I had drained. I felt sick. I had killed five animals, and I hadn't even killed them kindly. They had to have the life slowly sucked out of them, and they had had no chance of fighting back. But my thirst was not completely satiated. I could feel the blood sloshing around in my stomach, yes. I did not want anymore, yes. But I still had that faint echo of a burn in my throat.
"Why do I still feel thirsty?"
"You're still young. It will die away mostly after your first year. But it will never completely be gone, the thirst will always be there."
That made me sober up to the fact that this was real. But then I remembered all the reasons why I liked that this life had been chosen for me, and I was happy again. There were too many good things going on right now for me to be worrying. Then another thought came to me.
"We don't die?"
"No."
"Never?"
"Never."
"Wow…"
I couldn't wrap my head around it … forever. I'd never have to die. I wouldn't get old. I was pretty sure that I wouldn't get sick. And I didn't seem to get tired. What would I do with an eternity? I could do so much with eternity. I could learn so much. And there were new findings and inventions made every day. I would never get bored of the world. It would always be changing, and I would be here for all of eternity to document it with my own mind. Perfect. Just absolutely wonderful.
"What is the … house for?"
There was a house at the edge of the clearing. It was large and lavish. I'm sure that it had been expensive to create, it looked expensive.
"I'm sorry."
"What?"
"I'm sorry … I had to buy all your belongings. You see, you have no living relatives any longer. I'm afraid that the Masen line ended with you. So I had to buy your belongings from the government's possession. I bought all of your property. Your land is still there in my name, but I brought all of its interior with me here. You can't go among … humans while you're still so young. You'd slaughter them. So though I know that you'd probably rather that you get to see your house exactly as it was, I've already moved everything here. I'm sorry. There was no other choice."
"Oh." I said. I didn't really care that he had moved the things here. I felt as if I'd be sad if I had to go back to my house and remember my mother and father. mother. "It doesn't matter. You did what you thought was best. Thank you for doing this for me." He smiled genuinely at me.
I sensed happiness in his thoughts. He was happy. He didn't like being lonely. I got the sense that he'd been wandering this world alone for quite a long time. No one understood his need to keep from satiating his thirst with humans. He was hoping that I would accompany him. And I didn't want to disappoint. He had offered me this wonderful life, and he had cared for my parents. I would stay with this doctor. He would become my second father, and he would help me through this new and fantastic life.
"Would you like to see the inside?" he asked.
"Yes. Yes, please."
I put my hand on the doorknob and turned it lightly, careful not to break anything. This amazing strength could have its drawbacks sometimes. And I was met with an incredible sight. I was looking at my foyer. No, this wasn't my foyer. But it looked exactly the same. But the house wasn't the same from the outside at all. The dimensions were all different, and much more larger and … yet, the foyer was the same. There was my piano. My piano, my Steinway piano. I noticed nothing else now. My piano looked so different now, yet still the same. I could see a lot more scratches and flaws then I had ever seen. But I knew that it was not because Dr. Cullen had scratched it on the way here, but because my weak human eyes could not see the scratches clearly before. There was a mark in the shape of a circle. A dark, murky memory came back to me of my mother telling me not to put a coffee cup on the piano. I remembered telling her that it wouldn't leave a mark, showing her that there had been no damage done. And to my eyes, there had been no damage. But I could see now, I could see that mother had been right.
Mother … where had mother gone? To heaven I suppose. There was no way that she could have survived. Father was dead, I knew. I remembered that from my influenza-crazed hours. I remembered the pain at the realization. I had no family anymore. No family at all. I felt myself going into a state of depression. How easily my mind seemed to change from a state of exhilaration to a sad state. This mind was so new to me. It seemed to go through emotions like tissue paper.
I felt Dr. Cullen's hand on my shoulder. And my mood changed again. He was my family now. I was to stay at his side for eternity. It was a bond almost stronger than marriage. I could feel the his venom flowing through my veins, connecting me to him. We were bond in a way that was incomprehensible, and yet so strong. I could not leave him, and he would not leave me. I would stick to his diet of animals. And I would never know the taste of human blood. It couldn't be so hard to resist could it? But then again, I had never had any. And I didn't know how good it could be.
My piano still sat there waiting for me. And I did not hesitate to go to it now. I sat upon the bench, careful not to sit with too much force and crack the polished wood. The cover on the piano lifted up and I stared at the familiar yet so different keys before me. The once shiny and glossy keys of white and black stood before me, scratched in various places. Yet they were still so beautiful, because I could now see the marks that made it mine. I was sure that I could tell this piano apart from any other now.
My left hand automatically settled above two keys, and pressed lightly. I didn't have to remind myself to be careful. My lithe fingers had the amount of pressure needed memorized. I started the slow beginning of a song I remembered from a time that seemed to come from long ago. I tried to remember the name of the song through the haze that was my memory. What was it, this song? The melody changed into something more like the flowing of water. A strong memory came to me. I sat in the foyer that was replicated right here, and played in the sadness of my mother's sickness. Oh. Clair de Lune. I remembered now, the sadness that Debussy had let me express through his music.
I played on through the night. I barely noticed when Dr. Cullen left the room to go somewhere. I didn't particularly care where he was at the moment, I was reminiscing. I did however notice when the sun began to go down. I stared at the wonderful sight through the window. The windows had so many scratches on them, they were so hard to see through, so tainted. I wanted to see the beauty of the sunset through my new strong eyes. So I stopped playing for the first time in hours, and I stepped out of the house.
"Up here, Edward."
I whirled at the sound. It came from above. Dr. Cullen was perched on the edge of the roof, his legs dangling off the edge.
"Dr. Cullen? … What are you…?"
"Please Edward, it's Carlisle. Jump up. You'll find it quite easy. And the view is spectacular from up here. But careful, I don't particularly fancy building part of the house again." He chuckled.
"How did you get up there?"
"Easy, just … get leverage, and push yourself up. Jump."
"Um, I'm not so sure I won't -" he cut me off.
"I said don't worry Edward, you won't break anything. Promise."
I sighed. There didn't seem to be any arguing with Dr. … Carlisle. I reached up and took hold of a ledge of a window, then coiled to spring. Surprisingly, I sprang quite easily all the way up to the roof, and landed with a light thud. It wasn't hard at all. I could have gone over the two story high roof if I'd pushed any harder. Amazing. Carlisle smiled at me and patted the patch of roof next to him. I smiled back, exhilarated.
Then I set my eyes to the sky above me, and marveled in the beauty, with my new father, Carlisle, at my side to share the experience with me.