Disclaimer : Castle is not mine.
Castle walked into the loft shortly after 12pm and went straight to his bedroom and sat on the edge of his bed. He stared down at his leg, his hand rubbing his thigh. Despite having a prosthetic for so long he still got pain every now and then or his prosthetic would pinch and rub at whatever is left of his leg. Most days he tried not to think about his leg, wouldn't let himself wallow in pity or grief for his leg. Always being told that he should be happy that he would alive even if he was missing a limb. He was confident in most things in his life but when it came to his leg that is what terrifies him the most. The fear of rejection or pity from people. Page 6 always portrayed him as the playboy author when in fact he was the complete opposite, the truth being that he has only ever been with 2 women; Meredith and Gina. He sighed again and decided it was probably time to start packing. He saw his duffle bag and the very bottom of his wardrobe and inwardly groaned. Things on the floor were the hardest to reach due to the awkward angle he has to bend down at. Resting his right hand on a chest of draws for leverage, he spread his right leg straight behind him and bent with his left knee and quickly snagged the duffle with his left hand before returning to full height. He packed what he usually would, clothes, cologne, toothbrush etc. Then it came time to pack stuff he would need for his prosthetics, the cloth he always saw as a sock to cover what's left of his leg so that the prosthetic does not rub, pain medicine because he still had bad days. He quickly zipped his bag and layed some crutches on the bed next to it. He didn't wear his prosthetic in his sleep and he liked to not wear it so much in the evenings so he often relied on his crutches to get around.
Across town Kate Beckett was pacing in her bedroom, her thoughts running a mile a minute. She wondered what Castle was being so mysterious about, she thought she knew him better than she knew herself. They had been getting closer recently. She smiled as she thought back to the week before when they saw forbidden planet. She knew he had seen the film before, she knew as she saw the look of familiarity in his eyes. She remembered wondering why he has lied, saying he never saw it, but deep down she knew why. She knew it was because he was scared he would get rejected after all she has spent the last 3 years pushing him away. It broke her heart realizing this but it also made her heart flutter as he just wanted to spend time with her. Watching a movie with him was fun but the long week and lack of sleep caught up with her and the next thing she knew he was gently rubbing her cheek with his thumb and softly whispering her name. She felt like she had gotten a glimpse of her future when she had woken up with her head on his shoulder and him gently whispering her name. She was slowly starting to allow herself to have a relationship with him. She was doing it step by step. Allowing the stares to last longer, the touches to become lingering, and for them to go to more places together outside of work. More non-dates that were starting to feel like dates.
She shook herself out of her thoughts. She had to focus, her and Castle were going undercover at a holiday resort, more specifically a holiday resort strictly for married couples. She frowned at her wardrobe as she realized how professional her wardrobe had become over the years with her rarely going on any form of a break and if it was it was usually to her dad's cabin. She picked up a pair of tight, black skinny jeans and laid them on her bed. The jeans fit her just right, hugging her legs making them look long and muscled, the shaped her butt as well thinking back to the other day when she caught Castle checking her out whilst she was bending over writing something on the murder board. She blushed as she started to realize how she generally wore more clothes that she saw Castle appreciated or accentuated her curves. She then got another pair of skinny jeans, these being years old and her favourite. She only ever wore these ones on her days off. They were levis and the denim had worn giving them the perfect 90s vibe which she loved. She decided to throw in a pair of black slacks just in case she thought. Next she moved on to the top half of her body. Once again she sighed at her selection and decided that as soon as this undercover mission was finished she was in desperate need of a shopping trip. She threw in mostly plain coloured tops, black, white, purple and green. She decided she was going to throw in a blue button down which she knew complemented his eyes wonderfully. Next she packed her pajamas, a pair of plaid shorts that flowed and looked a lot shorter on her due to her long legs. She smiled as she imagined Castle's reaction to seeing her in shorts that stopped mere centimeters before her butt. She threw in a pair of long pajama bottoms and a few oversized shirts. She blushed as she thought of what underwear to bring and then rolled her eyes at herself with how ridiculous she was being. She packed a few basic pairs of underwear and deciding to be bold she packed a few pairs of her nicer matching underwear including lace and silk. Next was a swimsuit as she knew the resort had a pool and a man made beach both inside and out. A one piece and a bikini appeared in her suitcase next. She paused to think if she had forgotten anything and deciding she hadn't, making sure she had packed jumpers and socks, she zipped up her suitcase and took a deep breath and sat down on her bed.
Kate quickly stood up, grabbed her suitcase and walked towards the door. She decided that if she sat there any longer she was going to over think the whole situation and she was just going to overwhelm herself. She called a taxi and within 10 minutes she was on her way to Castles. She sent him a quick text once she was in the taxi so that she knew she was on her way to his.
By 2 o'clock Beckett was knocking on Castles door which was quickly opened by a very tired looking Castle.
"Hey Beckett, come on in." Castle waved her in as he slowly walked over to the kitchen.
Beckett watched him as he slowly walked over to kitchen counter where there was a glass of water and a bottle of pills were placed. This caused her to frown slightly.
"You okay there Castle?" She asked nodding her head towards the pill bottle, concern clearly in her eyes.
He sighed "Yeah, I'm fine, I just can't decide whether to take them or not."
"How come?" She asked confused.
"Because if I take them they'll make me tired and I won't be able to drive or anything that involves much concentration." He explained, eyeing the pill bottle, torn between what to do.
"Why do you need the pills anyway?"
"My leg hurts"
"Why does your leg hurt?"
"It's part of what has to do with the no questions, I'll explain it more later but I'm not quite ready now." He explained before taking the pills and walking over towards the door. Beckett watched him walk towards the door and focused on his leg, noticing for the first time the slight limp in his walk. She frowned and wondered what could of happened, she decided that for the mean time she would just go with the theory that he either pulled a muscle or twisted something and didn't want to talk about it because he was embarrassed. Because surely he couldn't of had this limp the whole time she has known him, has he?
He walked over to his bag and picked it up and the crutches that were propped against the wall. Kate became even more confused and opened her mouth to ask a question but he quickly interrupted, "Please, Kate, no questions just yet." He almost begged and she quickly closed her mouth and went to leave the loft with him. Outside the door he handed her his keys to both the loft and the car and asked her to lock the door for him due to how much he was carrying. She quickly locked the door for him and they rode down in the elevator in silence with Castle leaning heavily on the wall of the elevator, already becoming sleepy from the pain medicine. Kate slightly reached out and lightly stroked her hand over his arm, this made him look at her and she smiled in return.
She realised at this moment in time that he needed her to be accepting of his needs and to be comforting and she is trying to do that.
The elevator doors opened and the walked over to Castles Land Rover. She loved his car but she wouldn't tell him that. The chance to drive it made her excited and she couldn't help but speed up towards the drivers side and was bouncing slightly when she realised Castle was bent over close to the elevator. Beckett quickly put her bags in the car and quickly walked over to him. He was panting heavily and his eyes were squeezed tight in pain.
"What's wrong Caste? How can I help?" She asked him, rubbing her hand up and down his back.
"Can you carry my bags please and I'll just use the crutches to help." She took his bags off of his shoulder and stayed close whilst he put his crutches in place. "Thank you." He whispered as he slowly started to walk towards the car. Once at the car he threw the crutched in the back seat and used his left leg to take most of his weight whilst he got in the car, Beckett by his side in case he needed her. Once he was in the car she closed the door and put his bags on the back seat along with her bags and she quickly got in the car and started driving. The tension in the car was evident and was becoming slightly awkward.
He sighed heavily whilst she was driving, his head rested against the cool glass window. His voice was pained and gravely when he spoke.
"When I was younger there was an accident and you could say I've got a lot of nerve damage in my leg. That's why it hurt so much today, the pain comes and goes, always has done and always will. For now that is all I'm able to share in my current state."
Kate let out a slow breath before reaching over and grasping his hand in hers "Thank you, Rick" They held eye contact for only a second as she was driving, but she never let go of his hand.