Life sucks and then you die.

Yeah, I should be so lucky.
My first statement had come true as predicted. Life sucked. Sadly, I wasn't dead yet. I should have been, it would have been a hell of a lot easier. Death was easier than heartbreak. Death was easier than a rejection that ran this deep. Death was easier than losing your best friend that you loved to your sworn enemy. Sadly, I couldn't say he was my total enemy, at this point; we sorta relied on each other. Or more, he relied on us to help keep his precious Bella safe.
But she was half mine.
She had loved me, and she couldn't tell me that she hadn't. But she had gone and was going to marry him. It was a matter of time, before they turned her into a bloodsucker, like the rest of them.
My friend, My Bells, a vampire.
I stopped the train of thought as I threw the bag of chips against the wall and heard them crack and fall to the floor.
She wasn't mine anymore. She had chosen.
"Hell yeah! Go Seahawks!" That was Paul screaming from the other room. "Did you see that Seth??"
"Com' on man!" Paul groaned, finally noticing Seth could care less about the glory of NFL.

"Shut up!" I yelled from my room, which always felt too small now.
"Sorry Jake, didn't want to interrupt your self-pity party going on in there." Paul called out, laughing at his own joke.
My hands were shaking; all I wanted to do was phase and beat the shit out of him. I didn't though. They would then be able to hear my thoughts; then they would know I was having a self-pity fest. But hadn't I earned that right? She was still my friend, and I knew I would still die for her, even though she would die for him.

Seth walked into my room, and sat down on my bed with me. I couldn't help but growling, but I halfway regretted it when I saw his face drop.

"Sorry Seth." I mumbled, as he picked up the bag of chips on the floor, and began to sort through them. He offered the bag to me but I shoved it away.
Seth looked at me quizzically; he knew I was always hungry. I shook my head again, and he shrugged.
"Sam smelled something weird today." Seth told me casually. As much as I didn't want to show it, I knew my black eyes showed interest.
"Does he have any idea what it was?" I asked despite of myself.
Seth shook his head, and shoved a few chips into his mouth. "He thought you should tell the Cullen's though. I mean they always wanna know about anything we find."
"Phhhhst." I snorted.
Seth smiled at me. "I really think he just wants you to pick Billy's medicine so he doesn't have to."
I rolled my eyes. "I'll ask Sam." I heaved myself up from the bed, and began walking out the door, but Seth called me back. "Hey Jake, can I sit in here?"
I shrugged my enormous shoulders. "Sure I don't care."
He shot me an appreciative look, "Thanks man, I don't give a crap about the Seahawks."
I nodded and walked out the door, ignoring the scene of Quill and Paul on the couch, arguing over teams, and fighting for the bowl of popcorn. I popped Paul on the head, and instantly felt a wonderful pang of happiness when the popcorn bowl overturned and spilled all over him. "Dammit Jake!" He exclaimed his eyes not leaving the display of manliness that had him glued to the TV screen. I strode out the door, and found Sam and Emily outside. "So you really smelled something?" I asked immediately, cutting to the chase.
"Yes I did." Sam replied. "But nothing threatening that I can tell, just new and different."
I eyed him. "Alright I gotcha 'new and different'"
Sam looked at me with approval, "Just let them know, tell them it's towards the border on their side."
I started towards my car, but he tossed me the keys to his. "And get Billy's medicine while you're there."
Suddenly I remembered, Carlisle was only to be found at the hospital, and now Edward worked with him, learning from his father. As I got in the car, I sped down the little winding road that lead out of the reservation, I backed off the gas once I hit 80; knowing Sam would kill me if anything happened to his car. It was now a question of who I wanted to see more, Dr. Cullen or Dr. Cullen?
I laughed to myself, but then stopped, it really wasn't that funny. I didn't care who I told, it would be whoever was available. I pulled up to the hospital parking deck, which could have been some sorta of fun maze had I been in the mood. Unfortunately, I was not in the mood.
The signs that told me 'reserved parking' 'outpatient parking', 'same day surgery only parking' and 'no exit', annoyed the hell out of me. Unable to find a place I could park without being rerouted to yet another; I parked in spot number 259, or 'reserved doctors parking.' I laughed to myself again, maybe I'd get Sam's car towed. I walked in the hospital, and immediately I felt myself tense. The floors were squeaky clean, uniformed people walked up and down briskly, it was so stiff. I felt suffocated. Everyone who looked at you was scrutinizing you, wondering what was wrong with you to be in this place. I shuddered and kept walking to the front desk, where a blonde receptionist lady sat, obviously staring at me as I approached.
"You'll need to register, and then go to triage." She told me, not looking at my face. Her voice was breathy, annoying.
"No uhh. I'm not admitting myself; I'm just here to see someone."
She smiled at me and I watched as her French tip fingernails pressed upon the keys of her computer, "Who?"
"Doctor Cullen." I said, hoping that not too much bitterness slipped through.
Her smile broadened, she obviously knew of the handsome bloodsucker. "I'll page him." She breathed with a little spark of delight.
I nodded, and turned from her, just in time to see a tiny little figure sweep through the door. I could recognize the stench anywhere, plus her spiky black hair stood out too. It was Alice.

I saw her nose crinkle, and she looked around until her eyes spotted me. She walked to me, and whispered 'act normal' in my ear.
After an awkward embrace, she pulled me towards the sliding door that led to the real inside of the hospital. "Here to see Carlisle?" She asked, as she walked through the doors, she obviously had some VIP access. I nodded. "Sam said he smelled something weird."
She said nothing, and when I turned back to her Alice's eyes blanked out, and she stared off into space. I should have been used to it by now, but it always creeped me out. "Alice." I nudged her, but she pushed me away, still trying to see. Finally her body shuddered, and she blinked a few times, and began walking down the hall. "Weird!" She muttered to herself.
"What?" I asked, somewhat curiously.
"Car crash." She mumbled. "Someone crashed, a young guy and a girl-"
I shrugged. "That's it?"
She looked concerned. "I've learned to block out stuff like that, that isn't important, not sure why this one slipped by me. "
I could offer her no explanation, I didn't understand any better than she did.
Her eyes went out of focus again and I rolled my own. "What now?" I asked almost impatient, people got in crashes all the time.
"It's not that bad." Her voice was distant, and her eyes still stared off into oblivion. "The girl broke her wrist, and needs stitches. The guy-" She shuddered again, her voice nervous. "I can't see either of them clearly." I looked at her in amazement, sight to us, was complete blindness to her. She was obviously uncomfortable when the future eluded her, it was like being blind. "Alice, it's no biggie." I began in a sympathetic way, it was almost painful to see her in distress, she was tiny, helpless looking. She nodded, and then began to look around; noticing people in the hall station had stopped to stare at her. I glared at them, and led her away, to a less populated part of the hall. Her small frame sagged, "I can't believe I was so obvious."
"No Alice." I began. "I think they were just-"
She cut me off with a smile flashing her teeth. "You were taking me to neurology right? Chronic Seizures?" She joked, letting her eyes roll back into her head. I laughed; of all the Cullen's I liked her best.
"Yeah, seizures. Oh did I mention she's also truly physic and a vampire?"
She laughed a ringing melodious sound. "And I'm taking you in for steroid abuse." She winked, and I chuckled. I'm sure I looked like I dosed, majorly. "Oh damn. " She whispered, "Edward and Carlisle are leaving in exactly, 9.8 seconds."
I snorted, "Well I'll tell you-"
Alice held up a tiny chilly hand, and I had to stop talking. "But they'll be back right after 'lunch'." She had emphasized the word lunch, although I knew Edward and Carlisle didn't eat. They would probably just be taking a small break of some kind, if nothing more but for the sake of looking normal.
I rolled my eyes at her, "So what should I do?" I asked. "What does the future hold for me?"
She giggled, and danced down the hall. "You know I can't see you Jacob Black!"
I ran after her, she was in weird sorta way pleasant company, compared to Paul and all the guys that had to crash my house. "How's Bella?" I asked, as over took her skip in less than a stride of my own. Alice turned to look at me as if she wondered how I could handle asking this question. "She's good, doing really well." Alice was vague, but I didn't ask for details, I didn't want them. "She's happy?" I questioned knowing the answer would only hurt me. Alice nodded. "She truly is Jacob." I knew she was happy. Happy like most of the other people I knew. Quill couldn't go a day without being with his tiny Claire. Jared was completely infatuated with his doe eyed girl. I didn't even know her name, honestly, she bored me. My mind wandered and I started thinking about all the people I knew that were happy. They were happy because they had found their other half. Obviously, Bella and Edward were in euphoria. Alice and Jasper complimented each other nicely, and it was obvious that their love ran deep. Emmett and Rosalie, well, you couldn't have set two people up better, the super model, with the super man. As if she had read my thoughts, which was impossible, Alice looked me in the eye, "But she loves you too Jacob. You are her best friend."
I had heard that one enough. "C'mon Alice, you of all people, don't buy that right?"
She stared off into space, and all I could think of was seriously, not again.
"I do believe that." She shrugged, "It's your choice though."
I sighed, as the noisy PA crackled overhead calling some various doctor to some sorta of O.R.
I opened my mouth to speak, but the wailing of an ambulance siren stopped me. Suddenly there was a burst of explosion and stretchers and people came running in, shouting to each other in terms that didn't even sound like English. As I glanced around uneasily, Alice looked at me sympathetically, she knew this was like my own personal version of hell. "They're back." She announced nonchalantly. Her eyes didn't even go out of focus for this next prediction. "The car crash, I was telling you about, they are working on those people now. Let's give them a few more minutes; I don't recall this needed much time."
The loudspeaker crackled again. " to the O.R." I could tell it was the breathy blond, I wondered if she'd slip a giggle in on the next page. "Dr. Cullen to the O.R."
"Damn." I muttered, I had hoped it she would have embarrassed herself, however, she had remained somewhat professional.
Alice noticed my expression and smiled. "That's Eliza." She pointed up toward the ceiling, as another page went out. "She's rather worshiped."
I raised a dark eyebrow. "Who? Actually, a better question is why."
Alice laughed merrily, I could tell she enjoyed Eliza. "By men."
I blinked. I didn't think she was pretty at all.
Alice cleared her throat and corrected herself. "Or they did, until Rosalie showed up."
I couldn't resist a chuckle, I could see Eliza, bleached hair, tan as could be, French tips, being confronted by Rosalie, who was obviously a hundred thousand times more beautiful. "Bitch fight!" I exclaimed to Alice excitedly, my eyes lighting up.
She laughed at my reaction, "Yeah, you pretty much summed it up. I mean she hated Rosalie… not that I wouldn't if she wasn't my sister." Alice paused laughing. "She also hates her, because she thinks that she's dating Edward." I punched Alice in the shoulder, gently. "That is good, even for someone who smells as bad as you!"
She looked at the ground her expression almost embarrassed. "We just can't tell her that we're family, it's far too amusing."
"I'd be interested in seeing that, a bitchass blonde fight. "
Alice rolled her eyes. "Bring Quill and Embrey."
"I will, only of course because it'll cost them 20 bucks to see this thing."
Unexpectedly, as if she were being pulled, began walking down the hall, and I was forced to jo to cath up with her.
"Hey, physic, I don't know what's going on here." She stopped and smiled back at me. "Oh yeah, Edwards in room 286. You can go see him in there, the patient's totally out." It was my turn to shake my head. I had no idea how she was used to knowing things like this. She led me down the hall, and peeked into a room, I checked the number, and she was right, 286. "You've got company Edward." She giggled, and then danced out the door, patting me on the shoulder.