Disclaimer: Inuyasha is well out of my range of ownership, believe me!

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Later on that same day, Koga explained, as best he could, his idea on finding out the secret to chewing and blinking at the same time:

DAAAHHHH, GUUUUURRRRRPPP, DEEEEEEEE, BOHHHHHH.

Which translates into:

"I will visit my Sweet Old Granny and she will tell me the secret! She loves me!"

"But, Koga, she's the one that made you retarded in the first place." Hakkaku said, trying in vain to reason with Koga. "If it weren't for her, you'd be smart!"

"ME SMART!" said Koga, before crossing his arms, extending his lower lip, and making his face turn red.

"OKAY, OKAY! You're smart! Now, let's go to your Granny's house!" Ginta quickly said.

"YAY!" said... who else? Koga!

SO OFF THEY WENT! Koga started walking in some random direction, and Ginta and Hakkaku had no choice but to follow him, because they assumed he knew where he was going. Suddenly, Koga started running away for no reason. Just because, with Koga, running away is a fucking instinct.

"SON OF A BITCH!" Ginta screamed, running after Koga. Hakkaku just walked calmly toward Koga's general direction. This was an every day occurrence in their lives. Koga runs, Ginta gets pissed and runs after him. Ginta lost a bet, and that's why he's the chaser. Cruel, right? After finding Koga hiding under a rock, they started back to walking, only it was IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION!

GENIUS!

"Uh, Koga, we've already been by here." Ginta said, trying desperately to hide his frustration.

"HUSH, POOFACE!" Koga demanded.

"Yeah, Pooface." Hakkaku sniggered.

After another 20 minutes of just walking in random ass directions, Ginta and Hakkaku tell Koga that they have to go to the restroom. After Ginta and Hakkaku do their thang, they discuss Koga and his retarded decision making.

"Man, Koga doesn't know where the hell he's going!" Ginta bitched.

"Yeah, I know." Hakkaku sighed. "We need to try and ask him what his grandmother's name is, I guess."

"Are you out of your mind? That'll take hours!"

"So what? It's the only damn option we have, now get up and let's do this!"

Ginta and Hakkaku go back to where Koga was supposed to be sitting. Only, now he's gone.

"HE FUCKIN RAN AWAY AGAIN! SHIT!" Ginta screeched madly, searching for Koga. After 20 minutes of Ginta running around and looking under everything, Koga just walked over to Ginta, happily chewing on an apple.

"HI!" Koga waved cheerfully in Ginta's face. Ginta began to cry and cry and cry.

After an hour, Hakkaku got Ginta calmed down, and Ginta and Hakkaku started heading toward a nearby village.

"WHERE GOING?" Koga asked.

"Uh, we're going to get some food." Hakkaku told him.

"But I fuuuuulllllll." Koga whined.

"We're starved, Koga, we can hardly walk as it is." Ginta groaned.

"ME NO CARE! I WALK THERE!" Koga pointed another direction, quite far from where Ginta and Hakkaku were going.

Ginta and Hakkaku proceed to drag Koga's wolfish ass with them to the village. They get food, because Koga decided halfway to the village that he was "SO HUNGY!"

Fucking bastard.

Anyways, it was while eating that Hakkaku decided to spring the question on him.

"Koga, listen very carefully." Hakkaku told him, slowly. "Veeeerrrry carefully. Do you know what your Sweet Old Granny's real name is?"

"YAH!"

"Can you tell us?"

"SWEET OLD GRANNY!"

Hakkaku smacked his own forehead so hard that he bruises both hjis hand and his head. Ginta just sat to the side and laughed his ass off, finally being able to let Hakkaku suffer a little bit.

"No, goddamnit, her BIRTH NAME! Do you know it?"

"SWEET OLD GRANNY! DUMMYHEAD!"

Hakkaku seethed while Ginta roared with paralyzing laughter. Hakkaku finally lost his shit and threw all his food right in Ginta's face. Ginta and Hakkaku proceeded to tear each other a new asshole (eww, I meant beat each other up, fangirls. I bet I inspired some awful fanart with just that sentence...) for about 12 minutes while Koga wailed like a dingbat because of said fight. Finally, the guy who owned the place they were eating in threw all three of their asses out.

"Well, I'm still FUCKING HUNGRY!" Ginta hollered insanely while Koga bawled more. After Hakkaku managed to get Koga to shut up by humming some Feudal tune to him, they went off in some bumfuck random direction. At this point, Ginta and Hakkaku were just following Koga around again, hoping that, maybe, by some sort of damn miracle, Koga has just an inkling of knowledge concerning his Sweet Old Granny's where abouts.

"This is ridiculous!" Ginta complained. "It's almost sunset, why are we still subjecting ourselves to this?"

"Let's just allow Koga to walk. If he can keep this up, maybe he can somehow stumble upon the right place! He may remember something!" Hakkaku said hopefully.

All of a sudden, out of complete ass fucking nowhere, a bear (did those even exist in Feudal Japan? Well, HERE THEY DID!) came out of the forest, scaring the shit out of Koga, Ginta and Hakkaku. The bear left without incident, and Hakkaku had to take another 20 minutes to get the crying Koga calmed down.

"I hate my life." Ginta moaned, while shaking his head. It was going to be another long week.

TO BE CONTINUED...