Thank you for reading the second chapter! And thank you to everyone who reviewed! You made me so happy, thank you!

That suffocating sense, her screaming, all that blood. . .

Ayumu snapped his eyes open, earning a blast of water in each one. He quickly turned away to rub them, blinking rapidly to get the water out. He had to try and keep his eyes open, because every time he closed them for very long the events of earlier would replay before him.

He stood in the shower, trying to get clean as fast as possible. The water came rushing down, running over him in an attempt to wash away the dirt and grime. The warmth felt good against his tired muscles but stung at his injures. He wished he could stand under the hot water for a few hours rather then a few minutes. But, as he washed himself down with soap, being careful of his already irritated wounds, he knew he couldn't. He didn't want to leave Hiyono alone any longer then he had too. He didn't want to leave her alone at all, but they both need a shower. He had himself convinced of this. And not only to get clean but to try and calm their nerves down.

Ayumu let the water wash away the soap. No matter how hard he scrubbed the feeling of grime still lingered on him. Visible there was none, but the sensation was carved into his mind and it wasn't so easily washed away. He finally shut the water off, deciding that he had been in the shower long enough. Once the water stopped he felt a slight wave of dizziness hit him. He was so tired; if it wasn't for his memory of earlier he might actually sleep if he lie down. 'What are you thinking?' he asked himself, giving his head a slight shake. 'You can't go to sleep. At least, not right now.' That's right, he could sleep later. Right now he needed to go and check on Hiyono.

Ayumu stepped out of the shower, grabbing the towel he hung near by to dry off. Before he checked on Hiyono he would try to find her some clean clothes to wear. He was sure there was something in his closet that would fit her, or at least, enough to pass. He started putting his own clean clothes on, checking for the injures he had gotten. His knees were sore and slightly scrapped. Burses might show up after a few days, but if he was lucky they would be fine. There was a fairly bad cement burn along his arm, and his hand was a little sore. Really though, the only serious injury he had was the cut and bruise on his face. He glanced in the mirror, looking at it. He would have to remember to get the First Aid Kit out and bandage it later.

He finished getting dressed. He picked up his dirty clothes. The towel was fine, but since he didn't normally shower in here finding of his clothes in the laundry basket would bring questions he didn't feel like answering. But boy, He never thought he would be so grateful to put on clean clothes, ones that didn't feel like dirty wax paper against his skin.

He rolled the clothes into a ball and was about to leave when he stopped, a flash of white catching the corner of his eye. Sitting on the counter was a small white box. It wasn't even bigger then the palm of his hand. He stared at it for a minute, a burning guilt slowly spread through him. Part of him felt inclined to blame it for all of this, even though he knew that was impossible. It was no more that box's fault then the person next door.

If he hadn't got it on such a damn impulse-

He didn't bother finishing the thought. It didn't do any good to think "what if" or "if I hadn't". That wasn't going to help them right now.

That box had been in his pocket most of the day. Since after school and for the past few hours. He sat it there before his shower, wondering how it could even be in one piece.

Of all the things he imagined happening, he never would have expected this.

He picked the box up and then left the room, shutting off the light before he went.

'This has been one long night,' Ayumu thought to himself as he walked into his room. He threw his clothes into the basket near the corner. The small box he just put in the drawer of his nightstand. The less he had to stare at it, the less he would be reminded of what had happened.

As he shut the drawer he looked at the alarm clock. The red numbers of one-thirty in the morning stared back at him.

Ayumu had to stare at the clock for a few seconds before the time actually clicked in his mind. 'It's only one in the morning,' he thought, surprised. It felt like it should be later then that. But when he actually thought about it, he realized it made sense. He was tired, so of course it would feel later then it was. They did walk all the way over here, and that had to take a few hours. Not to mention a good amount of time had passed before they even got started.

He tried to keep his mind on the time and not think of anything else, but it wasn't long before the day was trying to replay the events from earlier.

Knowing he was late, trying to get there before she left, realizing she had just disappeared right before his eyes-

Ayumu gave his head a slight shake, turning his back to the alarm clock. 'I should hurry up and find those clothes.' He thought as he moved towards his closet. 'Hiyono has been in there long enough. After she's out of the shower and dressed I can try to figure out what to do next.' His mind was still out of it. He had hoped the shower would help clear it, but it didn't seem to work. He opened up his closet and began to look through his clothes. He grabbed the first things he spotted that looked like they might work: an older T-shirt and a pair of pants. She would have to roll up the sleeves to do anything but she could live until her clothes were washed or she got some new ones from home.
He shut the closet door. He left his bedroom light on, knowing he would be back in here.

'I wonder if Hiyono is done with her shower?' Ayumu thought as he left his room and headed down the hall. He realized he was walking faster then he needed to, a familiar feeling of dread growing with each step. He suddenly stopped. A numbing sensation was slowing spreading through his body. It suddenly felt like the soft light from the hall ceiling was pressing down on him, smothering him.

This dread, this feeling like he had made one of the biggest mistakes of his life, had spread through him before just hours ago. He tried not to think about it, tried to tell himself he was just panicking due to overstressed nervous.

'She's fine.' He started back down the hall, almost sprinting despite his sore legs. 'She's fine, she has to be. There's nothing that could happen to her here.'
If so, then why did he feel like something was about to happen?

He stopped in front of the bathroom door, the sound of rushing water heard as plain as day. 'See? She's fine. She's still in the shower.' He scolded himself, trying to calm down. His heart had started pounding again. His sight dimmed and brightened with each hard pulse. 'She's fine. There's nothing to worry about.'

'Please let that be true. . .'

Ayumu raised his hand and knocked on the door. "Hiyono," his voice sounded agitated and he swallowed to calm it. At least the shower had helped with one thing. His throat felt tremendously better and didn't really hurt when he talked. "I found some clothes you can borrow." He waited to see if she would respond, if she would say anything from a thank you to an order of what to do with them. But just as he guessed, silence was his answer.

Even though he expected it, he felt a new wave of worry wash over him.

If she wouldn't come to the door then his options on what to do with the clothes were limited. Not to mention there was his growing fear to leaving her alone any longer. But then, he couldn't just walk in there. 'Just open the door a little,' he considered. That way if she was out, though the sound of rushing water said otherwise, he wouldn't see anything and would be able to hand her the clothes.

He gave one last knock on the door, just in case. When no reply came he started to reach for the door knob. But then he heard something. It was faint, almost unnoticeable, but it was there. It sounded like one of the cabinet doors closing.

"Hiyono?" He knocked on the door before glancing down at the floor. He could see a strip of light coming out from under it, and saw a shadow move across the light. So she wasn't in the shower, but then, why was the water still running?

"I found you some clothes you can wear." He repeated, knocking again. Maybe she couldn't hear him? "Hiyono?"

'It's not that hard to hear someone in there,' his logic told him. He should know after all the times he was yelled at while in shower. His worry spiked again, almost making him act without thinking.

That's when he heard the sound of glass shattering.

"Hiyono!" Ayumu shouted. He almost went to pound on the door again before stopping. He grabbed the doorknob and twisted it, relived to find the door unlocked. Forget her getting the wrong idea. Something felt seriously wrong and he needed to be sure she was fine. "Hiyono?" He opened the door a few inches. He debated just pushing it open, but what if there really was nothing wrong? "Are you okay-"

"Go away!"

She wasn't yelling it, she was screaming. And it was a sound he had never heard come from her mouth. Something about the way that she said that, something in the tone of her voice, caused fear to grip his senses stronger then anything else that night. He swung open the door. It hit the wall with a slight bang, clearing his view just in time to see Hiyono standing over the sink as she brought a piece of broken glass down on her wrist.

"NO!" Dropping the clothes he dashed forward, grabbing her arm as she moved to cut herself again. She tried to jerk away as he did, the glass falling from her hand.

"Get away from me!" She pushed him away, then grabbed the dropped shard and started to slice at her wrist. Blood began to run down her arm. Ayumu grabbed her again, slapping the glass out of her hand. "You can't do this-"

Hiyono spun around and screamed again. "Leave me alone!"

For a split second all Ayumu could do was stare at her. Her eyes were swollen and red from the tears streaming down her face. Her wet hair, now clean of the dirt and blood, was tangled and sticking to her face. Her skin was pale and he could now see faint burses showing in varies places.

'This can't be happening, it can't be-'

She turned away from him, grabbing the broken glass again. Before she had a chance to cut herself again, he leaped at her.

The two struggled. The bathroom wasn't that big and as they wrestled they banged against the walls and sink. Ayumu had Hiyono by her wrists, trying to get her to drop the shard and calm down. Every time they banged into something Ayumu would cringe. Although he was stronger and could easily over power her, he didn't want to hurt her anymore then she already was. A shattered drinking glass lay in the sink, kept in the bathroom for brushing teeth and getting a late night drink.

"Please." Sobbed Hiyono. She was beginning to cry even harder. "Please, just leave me alone-"

"I won't let you do this!" Ayumu shouted.

'I can't let her do this,' he thought desperately, 'I can't let her die, not because of me.'

Ayumu's hand slipped on Hiyono's bloody arm. He lost his grip and was pushed back against the wall. But when Hiyono turned to pick up another piece of glass, Ayumu grabbed her again and spun her around. They struggled some more, Ayumu trying to think of away to stop her before she was seriously hurt.

But then Hiyono suddenly went limp and fell against him. He was still for a moment as she grabbed hold of his shirt. She was shaking severely and he could hear her sobbing into his shirt.

Letting her lean against him, he grabbed the nearest thing at hand- the towel laying beside the shower- and quickly wrapped it around Hiyono's cut wrist. He had a little difficulty securing it; Hiyono was gripping his shirt so tightly he couldn't get her to let go.

'I knew I shouldn't have left her alone!' Ayumu cursed at himself as he led Hiyono to his room and made her sit down on the bed. He pulled the top sheet up around her, covering her. 'Why did I leave her alone, why?'

After prying her hands away from his shirt, Ayumu ran back to the bathroom. The first thing he did was shut off the water. Pieces of broken glass lay glittering around and in the sink. Drops of water clung some of the pieces like dew in the morning. He looked away, opening the cabinet and pulling two towels and the First Aid Kit out. As he wet one of the towels down in the tub, he spotted the piece she had used to cut herself on the floor near the corner. The blood clung to it much like the water on the others pieces did.
He wondered how many times he would have to see shattered glass with blood on it.

He stood up, turning to leave. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror as he left. As he ran back to his room the reflection flashed in his mind. Pale face, wide eyes, the front of his shirt covered in blood. He vaguely realized he would have to change again. If the stains didn't came out of his clothes he would have to think of some reason for their disappearance.

Hiyono was still sitting on the edge of the bed when he came back into the room, rocking slightly as she cried. The blood from her wrist was seeping onto the sheets around her, staining them. He didn't care, he didn't even register it. He could change them later. He sat down beside her. He placed the First Aid Kit and the dry towel on his other side. Taking her arm, he began to carefully wash the cuts. They weren't too deep and he didn't think she hit an artery. Hiyono made no moves to stop him. She just silently cried as if he wasn't even there.

Ayumu didn't say anything as he finished cleaning the cuts and began to wrap it with some bandages. He couldn't say anything. He was too stunned, to absorbed in his thoughts to talk. Whatever safety he thought the apartment held had vanished. His nerves were tingling again, his adrenaline racing. His whole body felt strangely numb. Probably from shock.

He also felt a wave of the guilt that hit him with the shock. He knew Hiyono was in shock after what happened, but he didn't think she would try to kill herself. He should have followed his instincts and never left her alone. If he had then this wouldn't have happened. She wouldn't be hurt even more then before.

He finished wrapping her wrist. Putting the remaining bandages away, he picked up the damp towel again and began to wipe the smeared blood off. As he did he spotted darker burses along her skin. She must have gotten hurt more then he first thought.

Hiyono's crying was starting to subside, he could tell from the lack of shaking and quick breaths. She had stopped rocking and seemed to be staring straight ahead at the wall.
'She's calming down.' He tried to let relief fill him, tried to tell himself that it would be okay now. But the fear driven doubt remained. He couldn't shake the feeling that it wasn't over.

"Ayumu..." Hiyono's voice was low and harsh from the crying. He paused his cleaning with the towel as she slowly looked up at him. When she was finally looking at him he felt his insides twist at the look on her face. He almost preferred the blank stare she first had, not this one filled with sorrow and pain. "Why… Why did you stop me?" She asked, the pain in her voice almost making him wince. He kept his composure, tightening his grip on the towel as an alternative.

"What kind of question is that?" He asked, continuing to wipe the blood away. "I can't let you do that to yourself."

"I want to die." She was looking down at her feet, her voice starting to shake again. "I want it to stop. I don't want to live."

"You can't talk like that." Ayumu put the towel down. "You have to-"

"Don't you get it!" Hiyono spun towards him, grabbing his shirt and shaking him as she screamed. She didn't even try to keep herself covered, didn't even seem to notice her lack of modesty at all. "I don't deserve to live, I should be dead! I killed him, Ayumu! I'm a murderer!" Her eyes filled with tears again, falling thickly down her face. She opened her mouth as if to say more but only a mangled croak came out, her words choked by her tears. Finally, she buried her face in his shirt again, her shoulders shuddering with every breath.

Ayumu remained frozen as she cried anew. 'What do I do?' That question repeated again and again in his mind. He needed to clam her down, to make her stop thinking what ever was going through her mind. But he didn't know how. He had never been in a situation like this, he had never even pictured it. Yes, Hiyono had cried in front of him before, but not for reasons even remotely similar to this. 'What can I do? What can I possible do?'

Hiyono was talking again. He had to strain to hear as his shirt muffled her words. "Please, let me die Ayumu. If you love me, you'll let me die."

An ice-cold pain began to feel his chest. In the last nine hours both their worlds seemed to have changed drastically. Hiyono continued to cry, shaking severely as she begged him to let her die.

Slowly, hesitatingly, Ayumu put his arms around her. He wasn't sure why he did, but something told him it was the right thing to do. "You're not… You're not a murderer, Hiyono." He whispered. He could feel her body stiffen, becoming still. Whether it was due to the shock of him hugging her or she actually felt calm he didn't know. But if she was calming down, did it really matter?

A strange feeling washed over him at feeling her quick breaths against his neck and her rapid heart beat against his chest. He knew full well that she could have died earlier; they both could have died. He tightened his hold around her as he thought back on the incidence. "You didn't mean to kill him; you were only trying to stop him. And if you hadn't, you would probably be dead. We both would probably be dead."

The shaking had stopped completely and her sobs were dieing down.

"It's not your fault, Hiyono." His voice sounded strangely far away to him all of a sudden. "It's not your fault."

'It's mine. . .'