May 30, 2001 – Bear Creek, MN
A couple of days later, Sam finally called, but Jack didn't answer it. The rest of SG-1 tried in vain as well. After another couple of forlorn weeks in solitude, he got a call from Janet.
"O'Neill," he barked into the phone.
"Hi, Colonel, it's Janet."
"I'm retired, Doc, call me Jack. So what's up? Did the others put you up to calling me?" his gruff, slightly slurred voice asked her accusingly.
"No, Jack, they didn't, although I did think you might want to know that Teal'c is going back to live on Chulak."
"Good for him. Was there anything else?"
Janet let out a small snicker.
God, he's a mess. Is he drunk at 1130 hours? I hope this doesn't kill him.
"I see you're in a good mood today. I didn't just call to tell you about Teal'c. How've you been?"
"Peachy, Doc. The Aschen saved us. What's not to like?"
"Well, sir, I mean, Jack, I have my doubts too, but if you weren't in a position to do anything about it, I'm certainly not. I am surprised that your team didn't back you up at all. I heard some of your arguments. You definitely left the dumb act behind this time, but they just got caught up in it."
"Yes, well, if you want people to trust you, you have to earn it. I guess I didn't. Anyway, how's Cassie?"
"She's good, Jack. She misses you."
"Really? I haven't been gone that long."
"Jack," she warned him that his self-hatred was getting out of hand.
She heard him sigh before his reply. "Of course I miss her too. How is she doing in school?"
"Great. Although she was saying something about a boy there giving her a hard time."
"What? I'll kill him."
Janet giggled. "Easy, Jack. They're kids, remember? And he didn't hurt her as far as I know."
"Aren't you a reasonable one," he grunted.
"You should come for a visit. She's been hinting that she would like to spend a day with you again."
"Maybe some other time, Janet. I've got a lot going on up here."
I'm sure. A lot of suffering and hard drinking.
"You're retired now; you can get away to spend time with us. You and I haven't a chance to hang out for quite a while either."
"I don't know. Let me see what I can work out."
"Jack, I know a brush off when I hear one. I wonder what it is that you would rather do so I know if I should be offended," she ribbed him, continuing to force the issue. If she failed to drag him out of his misery, at least for a little while, she feared what he would be like the next time they spoke.
"Alright, Janet. Fine."
"Thank you, Jack. How about next Saturday?"
"I'll be there in time to take you two out to breakfast."
"Sounds good. I'll see you then," Janet answered before hanging up. She took a deep breath, almost exhausted from the simple conversation.
June 9, 2001 – Colorado Springs, CO
When Jack pulled into Janet's driveway that sunny Saturday morning, Cassie was already outside on the porch, and she ran down to greet him.
"Uncle Jack!"
Jack embraced Cassie, lifted her off the ground, and spun her around before putting her back down.
"Hey, pumpkin, how's school?"
"Uncle Jack, I'm 15 years old, you can stop calling me 'pumpkin'," she said rolling her eyes.
"You'll always be 'pumpkin' to me, princess. Now, don't change the subject. School."
"It's good. Only one more week in the year, but I'm getting good grades and everything. There's this guy being a real jerk to me though."
"What did he do?" he almost growled.
"He asked me out, and I turned him down, so now he's spreading rumors that I sleep around."
"I'm sorry, honey. It sounds like you made the right call turning him down. You tell me if he bothers you again, and I'll make him regret ever being born," he did growl the last part.
Cassie giggled. "Calm down, Uncle Jack, I have it under control. No one believes the rumors, and if he tries to hurt me or anything, you and Teal'c taught me how to defend myself."
"Ok. And I'm glad you still remember that boys are gross."
Cassie laughed again. It was like music to Jack's ears. He almost felt alive again.
...
Janet was watching the two of them from the kitchen window with a smile on her face. She knew Jack was in a bad way when she called him a couple of weeks ago. He sounded like he'd already been drinking, and it wasn't even noon yet. She told him that Cassie missed him and suggested he come visit. She knew that he would never refuse her, and with the way SG-1 abandoned him, Cassandra was probably the only one who could pull him back from the ledge. He loved that girl like she was his own daughter, and she adored him. Cassie never saw much of her birth father, so Jack had been the only fatherly influence in her life, and he'd done a fantastic job.
She couldn't help but be disgusted with way SG-1 treated him since they met the Aschen. This man's judgment had never steered them wrong and saved their asses time and again. She understood Daniel getting carried away; he always did. Sam got swept up in it when the ambassador started showering her with attention. Teal'c might have been the biggest surprise. He trusted Jack enough to betray his god, but not enough to even question the treaty with the Aschen?
Back to Sam and Faxon, what the hell was she doing? Everyone knew she was in love with Jack, except for her and Jack apparently. When Janet first arrived at the SGC, and she met the boisterous, smart mouthed, rugged, and gorgeous Colonel, she knew she could easily fall for him. Of course, early on she saw the sparks between him and then Captain Carter, and the Colonel fell hard and fast for Sam, so Janet gave up that dream long ago. But getting to know him over the years, she discovered the bravery, honor, selflessness, sharp intellect, and humility; the inner wounds and torments he has suffered. She cared about Jack deeply, and now that SG-1, and Sam in particular, were breaking his heart, she resolved to be there for him, to be one person he could count on in a life where he had lost too many of those.
She walked out the door to join Jack and Cassie.
"Morning, Doc. You ready to go out for breakfast?"
"Good morning, Jack. You know, I'm not your doctor anymore, so you could call me Janet; unless you want a physical while you're here," she quipped, smirking at him, then bursting into laughter at the horrified look on his face.
"Fine, you win. Ok, Janet, are you ready to go?" Jack said, waving his hands in surrender.
Janet giggled. "Yes, let's."
They arrived at the quaint family restaurant that they would usually go to when Jack would take Cassie out for breakfast, and they all ordered their usual fare, blueberry pancakes for Cassie, eggs, bacon, toast, and coffee for Jack and Janet. They fell into small talk for a bit, and then Jack asked Janet how her plans were coming along to open her new practice. She complained about the extra red tape thanks to the Aschen, and that she might have to wait until the Aschen medicines are ready for widespread use before she can even open. This got her voicing more specific complaints.
"The thing about the Aschen vaccines is that they contain elements that we don't even recognize, so there is no way to know what side effects they could have. We just have to take their word for it. It's the same with their bioweapon. It could very easily be adapted to target humans, and would wipe out the whole Earth's population in weeks. It's frightening the blind faith we are putting in them."
"You've got that right. We are completely at their mercy. And yet, for all of these marvels, we are giving them almost nothing in return. I know I'm cynical, old, pain in the ass, but something is wrong with that picture."
"It really makes me wonder whether I would even want to offer Aschen medicine in my practice, though I'm guessing I would be forced to."
...
They finished breakfast and went back to the house. Jack played chess with Cassie, helped her with some homework, and then they ate dinner.
"Well, pumpkin, it's time for me to head home. You take care of yourself, and remember you can always call me if you need anything."
"I know, Uncle Jack, thank you. It was good to see you."
Jack hugged Cassie and said in her ear, "You too, kiddo, and I'll see you again soon."
Janet came up and gave Jack a hug. "It was fun, Jack. Cass always loves spending time with you. Don't be a stranger."
"Thanks, Janet. I won't be. I'll be around."
To Jack's surprise, he actually meant it. As he got in the truck and pulled away, he was thinking about how nice it was to spend time with people who cared about him, who actually believed in him. He saw there was another option other than curling up and dying at the cabin. He also had another thought. If the Aschen were up to no good, someone was going to have to find out about it, and stop it if possible. People like Janet and Cassandra didn't deserve hell being forced on them by the Aschen. There were still people in the world making it worth saving one last time.
Trying to be a hero again O'Neill? I guess I might as well. Got nothing else to do. I can drink myself stupid afterwards.
June 10, 2001 – Colorado Springs, CO
Deciding not to go back to Minnesota just yet, Jack stopped at a library in a small town just outside of the Springs, got on a computer, and posted a message on the obscure channel he'd used many times before.
Hutch,
We need to talk. You know where, same place as last time. Just tell me when.
Starsky
After getting back on the road, Jack was starting to formulate a plan.
I'll have to see what Harry can get access to, if anything, but I'm not hopeful I'll be able to find anything useful on Earth. I need to know the real story with the other Confederation planets. That will give me an idea of what we are in store for. The biggest problem is that the gate is shut down until they move it to the new terminal in DC, and that could be months away yet.
Security at the gate here will probably be ridiculous, and I'm sure the other planets will have some kind of presence around their gates too. And there is no way I can afford to be caught. I might have to get a ship to travel to these worlds for cryin' out loud. Where the hell am I going to get a ship? Oh well, get to work O'Neill.
I'll also need a list of the addresses for the Confederation planets. The SGC is closed down except for a skeleton crew until everything is moved out of there. I'll have to find a way to get into Carter's paperwork. I'm sure she's in Washington right now. I'll try her house first. If not, maybe there is a way to get into her lab at the SGC. She's been involved in this from the start, so I know she has a list of those planets somewhere.
That evening, Jack parked around the block from Sam's house and walked the rest of the way. There were no vehicles in the driveway and no lights on in the house. Jack went around to the back of house, his footsteps not making a sound in the stillness outside. He picked the lock to the back door, and entered. When he verified the house was indeed empty, he headed up to Sam's spare bedroom, which she used as an office, turned on his flashlight, and started looking. She wasn't supposed to have classified materials at home, but Jack always trusted her to keep them secure. Now, that he was there looking for them, he didn't find the irony all that funny. Finding nothing out in the open, he opened her closet door and found her safe. It was a large, gray safe, roughly four feet tall, the kind businesses use to keep cash deposits in before taking them to the bank. It was also at least ten years old. It had the old fashioned knob you turn for the combination, which meant Jack could crack it.
After turning the knob and listening closely for a good half hour, he finally heard the click and pulled open the thick, steel door. He immediately looked for any files, ignoring her personal effects. Normally he wouldn't want to violate her privacy, but nowadays he wouldn't want to know anyway. The less he knew, the easier it would be to forget, he figured. He finally found what he was looking for. It was the report provided by the Aschen about all of the Confederation planets, as well as the mission reports from the handful of planets the diplomatic SG teams visited. He decided to take everything, used Sam's copier/fax machine to make copies, put everything back, closed up, and left, no one the wiser that he was ever there.
July 17, 2001 – Colorado Springs, CO
After another unsuccessful day trying to find someone that could help him find some dirt on the Aschen, Jack sat alone at a table in the corner at O'Malley's, no one within 20 feet of his table. He was nursing his fifth whiskey of the night, which he knew wasn't a good idea, but the frustration over his search, along with the self loathing and loneliness that always accompanied him, made him decide to try to get good and numb tonight. He just sat there sipping and glaring, hoping to keep people away from him, but being 2130 hours on a Tuesday, the place was pretty empty anyway.
Then he saw none other than Janet Fraiser walk in the door. He always knew she was a beautiful woman, but he didn't often get to see her dressed up in civvies, so he just sat there and appreciated the view, her burgundy top and gray skirt, hair and makeup done. She looked like she was probably on a date, so he wasn't going to bother her, but he enjoyed looking at her nonetheless.
She placed her order at the bar and turned and looked right at him, waving with a smile on her face. Jack simply raised his glass to her, not otherwise moving. She then said something else to the bartender and walked over to Jack.
"Doc. Fancy meetin' you here."
She just looked at Jack with an eyebrow raised.
"Sorry, I mean Janet. I don't need you shoving any needles in my ass tonight."
She giggled and replied, "Hi Jack. Had a few already, have you?"
"One or two. Or more. But who's counting?"
The waitress brought Janet's beer over to Jack's table.
"You don't mind if I join you, do you?" she asked him.
"Not at all."
They chatted for a while, just small talk, talked about Cassie, the usual stuff, while Janet had a couple of beers and Jack worked his way to whiskey number seven.
"You really look nice tonight, Janet. When I saw you come in, I assumed you were on a date."
"Thank you, Jack. I did have a date. Before I came here. It was a disaster. Sam's been trying for months to get me to go out with Joe's colleague, and I finally relented."
"Ah. Well, sorry to hear that. Not your type then?"
She snorted. "No. Just your typical, smooth talking politician. Nothing interesting to say. No backbone. Just a waste of my time."
Jack chuckled. "I'll bet. Well if he's a pansy, don't worry about it. You're an incredible woman, Janet. You deserve the best, and you'll find it."
She just stared into his eyes for a moment with soft, caring expression.
"You deserve the best too, Jack."
This time his chuckle had more than a hint of bitterness to it.
"Right. The only woman I've showed interest in since Sara got swept off her feet by some politician and his new friends with fancy toys."
"People make idiotic choices. That doesn't reflect badly on you."
"Come on, Janet. The guy is 15 years younger, smarter, better looking. I can't blame her. He has much more to offer than I do. I was a fool to hope things would be different."
"Jack, almost any woman would jump at the chance to have a strong, brilliant, honorable man like you. I know I would..." she cut herself off immediately.
Jack was too caught up in his misery to notice her slip though. He wondered why he was even talking about this.
"What the hell did they put in here, truth serum?" he asked holding up his tumbler.
She laughed out loud at the serious, confused look on his face as he inspected his empty glass.
With that, Janet offered to drive Jack home, since he was in no condition. Most of the drive was in comfortable silence, but when she pulled into his driveway, Jack spoke up again.
"It was fun, Janet. We should get drunk and commiserate again sometime." His words were pretty heavily slurred at this point.
She giggled at his drunken attempt to pronounce 'commiserate'.
"You can talk to me whenever you want, Jack, drunk or not."
"Thanks. Good night."
After Jack closed his door and stumbled up his front stairs, Janet whispered to herself, "Good night, Jack."
Her eyes didn't leave him until his door was closed. Then she shook her head and drove away.
August 14, 2001 – Colorado Springs, CO
On this muggy, summer day, Jack was behind the wheel of his black F-150, driving over to Janet's to pick up Cassie and take her out to eat, maybe see a movie, whatever she wanted to do. Since the day he sent word to Harry Maybourne, Jack had pretty much been at a standstill. He'd heard nothing from Harry and hasn't found anything else digging on his own. It was difficult, because he couldn't ask anyone that he couldn't trust for help. All of his old black ops buddies were either already retired or put of a job by the Aschen, and his most trusted contact in the CIA was a little too close to the Kinsey administration for his liking. He'd been contemplating putting together a team, but he needed more of a plan first.
How can I get my hands on a ship? How can I get weapons? When can I get off world?
So, with nothing to do but wait, lately, he has spent some more time with Janet and Cassie. They had pretty much saved his life. He still wasn't the happiest guy, but he's had a reason to wake up every day with them in his life. He surprised himself with how open he'd been talking to Janet, and he was grateful that he didn't get any pity from her. With no one else there for him, he's needed her friendship, and she's given it to him. He just wondered what he will do when she isn't there for him anymore, as is inevitable in his life.
...
As Janet sat there waiting for Jack to pick up Cassie and take her out for the day, she pondered the last few months and the relationships with her friends from SG-1.
She still talked to Daniel every now and then, nothing's really changed there, except he was always in Washington excited about some project the Aschen were putting him on, so she hasn't seen him in person in months.
Her friendship with Sam has been a bit strained after she questioned her motives for dating Joe Faxon and her treatment of Jack. Since then, Sam has distanced herself some, and Janet couldn't help but be a bit relieved. She was still a friend, but she couldn't bring herself to see it Sam's way, especially when she saw what effect the whole situation was having on Jack.
Her friendship with Jack was something that was starting to concern her. He'd been around several times over the past couple of months, and he had opened up to her quite a bit more than she ever thought he would. Learning the depth of the man that has so fascinated her over the years, she was terribly afraid of developing even stronger feelings for him. She knew that he was still in love with Sam. She saw the misery in his lifeless eyes, especially when Sam was mentioned, and the last thing she needed was to be Jack O'Neill's rebound. Not to mention, if Sam ever woke up, he wouldn't be able to turn her down. She was just going to have to lock those feelings up and be the friend that he needed.
Moments later, Jack's truck pulled into the driveway. He went up to the door and knocked. Janet opened it.
"Hi, Jack."
"Hey, Janet, the munchkin ready to go?"
Waiting for Cassie to predictably complain about being called a 'munchkin', he threw Janet a lopsided smile that flipped her stomach a little.
God, I'm in trouble.
...
Cassie was riding in the truck with Jack to get lunch, and she looked over to the man she thought of as her father. He had always been there for her, for all of them really, but especially her. She loved Sam too, but she really didn't like her for what she was doing these days. Cassie wasn't a dumb girl. She knew about their feelings for each other, and she saw how miserable Jack was after being left behind by Sam and his team. It was Sam's choice, but she didn't love Joe like she did Jack. That she would choose Joe over Jack was bad enough, but it was her life. But trusting the man she just met over the man that would do anything for her, and has for years, siding with the Aschen over him, was pretty despicable.
Cassie's also noticed her mother looking at Jack differently. They've become closer over past few months, and she knew her mother was starting to fall for him. Cassie knew better than to push it, because Sam was still an issue, but the situation gave her hope that maybe one day she could have Jack as her actual father, rather than just an honorary one. For this reason, she'd stopped calling him 'Uncle Jack'. Now, it was just 'Jack'. The thought of herself, Jack, and her mom as a family was bringing a huge smile to her face.
"What are you smiling like that for?"
"Nothing, Jack. I'm just happy to spend some time with you."
"Well, me too honey. So what do you want to eat?"
"The usual is fine."
They arrived at their most common breakfast spot and walked in the door. As they sat down at the table, Jack's pager went off, with a message:
Check your mail. H.
Being pretty sure that was Maybourne, Jack figured he would check it out later.
...
He and Cassie enjoyed the rest of the day. They ate lunch, saw a movie, and Jack took her shopping and bought her some clothes at the mall. When he dropped her off, Janet came out to the truck.
"It was good seeing you again, Jack."
"I always enjoy it, Janet. I wanted to tell you that I've got a project I'm going to be working on, so it might be a while before I can get back here."
"Oh, ok. What kind of project?"
"You know the kind of projects I work on. It is safer for you and Cass if I don't tell you. But if you need anything, just call, and if I can, I'll be here. And, I'll come visit as soon as I can."
"You aren't going to be doing something stupid, are you?" She was terrified he found himself some kind of suicide mission.
"No, Janet. Well, I guess it depends on your definition of stupid, but it's nothing like you're thinking. I'm not looking for a way out. And I can pretty much thank you for that. I can't tell you how much your friendship has meant to me, not just the last few months, but the last several years."
Janet's eyes got moist, but she held back any tears.
"Oh, Jack, it's nothing. You're always there for everyone else; I just wanted to be there for you. Just be careful, ok?"
"I will. Good night. See you soon."