"Gohan! Dinner!" At the sound of the magical word, Gohan set down his pen and ran to the dining table at inhuman speeds. He starts shoving food into his mouth before his mother could get another word out. "Someone's hungry tonight, huh?"
Gohan stopped eating long enough to flash the classic Son smile, with a face full of food, before diving right back in. His appetite had slowly been coming back over the past month and half. His mother seemed to only just notice. "Dish inder aests glate!"
Chi-Chi had already begun to wash the dishes. "Repeat that with your mouth empty please, honey."
Gohan swallowed loudly. "I said this dinner tastes great!"
"Thanks for the compliment sweetie. It's been a lot easier to cook since..." his mother trailed off, momentarily stopping doing the dishes, but quickly continuing.
Gohan, having cleared all of his plates, stood up and placed a hand on his mother's shoulder. "It's okay, Mom, you can say it. I'm fine. I've always been fine." Gohan assured her, even though the last sentence was a lie, he thought that she needed to hear it. And he wasn't about to break his promise this quickly.
"It's been a lot easier to cook since your father died." She said the last word like it burned her tongue. The pained tone was totally gone and was replaced by a chipper, joking one. "It takes a whole army's worth of food just to fill one of your alien bellies."
"I appreciate the effort, Mom!" Gohan thanked his mother and he returned to his room. He sat back down in his chair and picked back up his pen. Then the writer's block hit again. Does it count as writer's block if I'm writing about myself? Gohan thought, but shrugged it off. All I've written so far is my name and age. C'mon, Gohan, think! You're a smart kid!
He tapped his pen rhythmically in the corner of the paper, making little black dots appear. He needed inspiration. He understood, finally, that his wasn't some essay where his mother have him the topic and he just wrote down facts. This was him.
Then an idea struck.
I'm...well I'm new to this whole 'journal' thing, so forgive me if I don't do it well. But I think I have a plan. This journal is going to be the biggest essay I've ever written. The topic? Myself. I know me better than anyone, right? This journal will be almost like an autobiography, if you will. Though, unlike autobiographies, this will not be published.
I guess that I'll have to start by catching you up on recent events.
The best place to start would be the beginning, but I don't think that I have the time or the wrist strength to write it all down. Instead, events in my life will probably be brought up gradually as need be. So, to start with, I'll mention the baby. A random topic, I know. But, even though it's random, it has been weighing heavily on my mind.
Ever since Mr. Piccolo brought it up, I can't seem to not think about it. And when I finally manage to be it out of my head, something is said or done to remind me of it. Mom hasn't mentioned it yet, and I am definitely not bringing it up first. That would not reap good results.
And no, in case you're wondering, the 'it' I am referring to is not the baby.
Although we do not have a gender for the baby yet, I would never refer to him/her as an 'it'. It would be very disrespectful. I don't care if it's only a fetus, it is still alive. When I write 'it' I mean the pregnancy. Pregnancy within itself is inanimate, only a term. Calling pregnancy alive would be like saying that the word 'handicap' is alive. They are both terms put on to categorize.
But I digress, there is still one major issue: do I even want there to be a baby? Like, do I want a little brother/sister? I wasn't consulted in this decision. Would I even be a good big brother? I have no idea how to do it! But, after all, when the pressure is on is when Son's do their best, huh?
It'll be like a whole new adventure, this baby. Just like when I travelled to Namek, this is unknown and dangerous territory. The only high point is that I have Mom and Bulma to help. Both have/are raised/raising a Saiyan child.
Dende, another Demi-Saiyan. Now Trunks and I aren't the only ones. Maybe, if I play it right, I can get the baby to become friends with Trunks. If it's a girl, it'll be hard, but I think that I can do it if it's a boy. Even if our dads are 'rivals'. The baby will have friends, I'll make sure of it.
Come to think of it, I can look at this baby situation a whole other way. Instead of him/her being my stereotypical 'annoying little brother/sister', I can help him/her. I can give the baby the life it deserves, give it everything I didn't get. Friends, attention, space, individuality, happiness, a real childhood.
But...that's not possible, is it? In order to have a real childhood, you need a father.
I guess now would be the time to catch you up on Dad.
Dad, Son Goku, was a great man. He was strong, stronger than anyone else on the planet, and still managed to maintain a gentle, lighthearted attitude. He wouldn't hurt a fly (on purpose) unless it was evil. He saved the Earth at least half a dozen times and destroyed several evil monsters.
Just thinking about him always gave me a smile. I looked up to him, even if I did despise the training and violence. I'm a pacifist by nature. But I admired Dad like he was a God. He was my Super Saiyan Father!
But, and yes there is always a 'but', I keep having to use past tense. In case you hadn't noticed. That's because Dad...he's no longer with us. He passed, but it was for a noble cause. He sacrificed himself to try and defeat Cell once and for all (Cell had been about to self-destruct so Dad used Instant Transmission to get him off Earth, which succeeded, but Dad had been caught in the explosion).
Cell had, unfortunately, survived his own explosion. He came back and murdered Mirai Trunks. He's Vegeta's son from the future. It's thanks to Vegeta that I was able to beat Cell. Yes, I did it, but that's a story for another day. For now, let's stick to the topic do Dad.
After Cell was finally defeated for good, we returned to Kami's - err - Dende's Lookout. We wished back all the people Cell had killed. But that didn't include my Dad. The Dragon Balls can't wish back people who have already been revived before. Which Dad had been.
But, being the smart kid that I am, I came up with the idea of using the Namekian Dragon Balls to wish back Dad. Everyone agreed, even cheered, at my suggestion. They wanted Dad back as much as I did. There was one fatal flaw in my plan that I hadn't been aware of. Dad didn't want to come back.
He contacted us through King Kai and told us so. He said that he preferred to stay in Otherworld and train. The excuse he gave was that he was an 'enemy magnet'. That if he state dead, evil will stop being so drawn toward Earth. That no more tragedy or death would occur. As much as I wanted my Dad back, I knew that this was sound reasoning.
The hard part had been telling Mom. How do you tell your mother that your father isn't coming home? It's hard. Very dang hard. Probably the hardest thing I've had to do to date, but I managed to do it. She's cried every night since.
She thinks that I can't hear it, but I can. Her room is right next to mine, so I can hear it loud and clear. I can hear her crying, her talking, and - when Dad had been alive - her late night...activities...with him. I never told her then and I'm certainly not telling her now. Just as I promised Piccolo, I'm going to be strong for Mom and for the baby.
Long story over. Dad isn't here to help Mom raise the baby. And I hadn't even thought about it until now. Though, in his defense, he probably didn't even know that Mom was pregnant when he had made the decision to stay dead. Mom isn't handling it too well though. I notice her hand go to her stomach and her eyes will tear up when she thinks I'm not looking. I hear her crying pleas late at night for Dad to help her.
But she knows as well as I do that Dad isn't coming back to help raise that baby. There's no one to help her...
Journal, a thought just occurred to me.
Dad may not be here. Mom may be, by law, a single parent. But that doesn't mean that I can't step up. In order to achieve my goal, my wishes for this kid, I have to help raise him. Be his father figure. All those things that I mentioned earlier that I want to give the baby, I can give him by being his father. As for the real childhood part, I can do my Dende dang best.
Baby, I hereby promise to give you the best life I possibly can. Cross my heart. I will be strong for you and Mom. I will pretend to be happy, I will raise you, and, in the small chance that Dad was wrong, I will fend off all evil and take Dad's place as Earth's protector. All for you and Mom.
"Gohan!" Chi-Chi called.
"What's up, Mom?" Gohan yelled back.
"I need you to help me put away some groceries. Can you do that, sweetie?" She asked. Gohan closed his journal, pushed it to the upper right corner of his desk, right next to the lamp, and put the pen in the mug to his left.
"On my way, Mom!"
A/N: Longer chapter, but still short in comparison to what I usually write. I think, just by guessing, that these chapters, may all be shorter like this one was. I apologize. Seriously, like, I'm super sorry. I swear to Dende that my chapters are not usually so short! I always break 2000 words at LEAST on my normal chapters!
As a side note, in the summary and in the summary for Guilt, it says HCT. HCT is Head Cannon Timeline. Any stories marked HCT will fall in the same timeline, or, in other words, be sequels to each before it.
Thank you for taking the time to read my long Author's Note (if you did) and leave a review at the door! Thanks!
~animegirl336