Fine, you wanted more. Here's more. ;-) Don't expect this to go on forever, I'm writing a much happier fic right now, so I'll add another 2 to 3 chaps and declare it done.
Steamboat, you need to login so I can properly respond to your reviews! But thank you and you're welcome.
This part is inspired by McRose's Having each others back, so Jan, if you're reading this, I hope you don't mind I've borrowed some things because it was so brilliant. In the original ep, Mac wasn't pissed enough. Let's see if this passes as furious, shall we?
This was not how it was supposed to go.
Mac had had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach ever since she'd set foot back in the JAG HQ's building. The Admiral was giving Harm a dressing down she both hadn't expected and wasn't prepared for. This was not how it was supposed to happen. They were both supposed to come back, get settled in again and life would go on.
"Sir, he saved my life!" she heard herself protest.
Apparently, the Admiral was done. "Well, put him on your payroll! Mac, I am glad to see you, but I am equally fed up with this man's lack of dependability. You know, Rabb, you're not a team player. You never consider the big picture and you are completely controlled by your emotions."
Harm saw no point in denying it. "Can't argue with that, sir."
"If it wasn't for his emotions, I wouldn't be standing here!"
Harm's eyes drifted to hers for a split second. "You don't have to defend me, Mac."
"The hell I don't!" She stood straighter. "We all obeyed the order to stay away from him during his murder trial. I did, too. We were all supposed to drop him like a hot potato, because the SecNav's aid was at your throat because we do things a little unconventional in this office, every once in a while. And here I thought that was what made us such good investigators. What made us all a team."
The Admiral opened his mouth to interrupt, but she didn't even see it. This whole situation was upside down, and her last resolve to hold her anger in had snapped. She wasn't going to rein herself in anymore, and she sure as hell wasn't going to let him take it out on Harm.
"Isn't that why you usually send us in together, sir? That's what makes us your best investigators, is it not? He has my back, I have his. I add rational to his passion and the other way around."
"Mac, I can't send the man out at every hunch he feels he has to follow." He was not ready to back down yet.
What? "A hunch? That's rich, especially from you, Admiral. I'm good enough to point at some coordinates on a map, on what pretty much everybody would consider a hunch, but you won't trust him to tell you something is wrong with me?"
"What's your point, Mac?" The Admiral was getting impatient.
Mac could care less. "Did you even expect to see me back, sir?"
"Excuse me, Colonel?"
She was going to cross the line. Damn her career. She didn't even want it anymore. Her eyes flashed with barely contained fury. "It's an easy enough question, isn't it? Did you expect to see me back?"
"Of course I did. I…"
"Then why did you send me in alone?"
"I didn't send you in alone. You had Webb to back you up, and Gunny…"
She huffed. "And the entire CIA? Because that's their MO, right? 'Leave no man behind', rather than 'if your cover is blown, we don't know you'." Ruefully, she shook her head. "I should have realized something was amiss when Webb came in here asking for me by myself, without specific reasons as to why he wanted me. He has more than enough agents with my skills at his disposal, yet he came here for me. You and he both should have known Harm and I get these missions done together. Do I need to remind you of the Declaration? Or the Sudanese embassy? But then again, I don't usually second guess orders from my Commanding Officer."
"This was on a volunteer basis…"
Oh, no. He wasn't going to throw it back into her face. "Was it? I believe your exact words were: 'Webb's requested that you be assigned to him TAD. I've agreed.' Where does that leave room for volunteering?"
"Mac, you don't understand…"
Raising to her full length, she looked the Admiral in the eye, every inch of her squared away Marine. "I understand plenty, sir. I'm good enough to follow Harm to Russia for a dispassionate plan, twice, and I'm good enough to point at a map so someone can go find him in the middle of an ocean thousands of miles away, but when he comes and tells you that he can feel something's gone wrong, I'm suddenly not a good enough officer, Chief of Staff and friend to come and find." Mac clenched her jaw. "Although for the life of me I can't figure out what it was, I apologize for whatever I must've done wrong to lose your respect, Admiral. Because the Admiral Chegwidden I used to know, would never leave either of us hung out to dry the way you did."
Was that what she felt had happened? "You've never lost my respect, Colonel," he quietly offered.
"Then I must have never had it in the first place." She stood at attention. "I won't work for someone who takes his anger out on his subordinates, sir. There are plenty of other career opportunities out there for me, where people would be happy to have me, who would value my work and my input. I should have realized." Her gaze fixed itself on a spot behind his desk. "Expect my letter of resignation on your desk within the hour. I hope you'll do me the courtesy of processing it, this time."