Chapter 2
She looks at the stars and wonders what is it like to never have to concern yourself with mortal affairs—to not have to drench yourself in blood while covering your face with a beautiful mask and your mouth sprouting hollowed pretty words.
Evelyn has done her best tonight to gather power for her goal and what a great reward that she has been promised—the full support of Empress Celine herself in this war against Copheryus and beyond. But then again, that 'beyond' would only last until the day the truth comes out, Evelyn has no doubt that once Solas's—No, their plan goes into motions, Celine, and perhaps even Briala, will regret deeply to ever associate themselves with the Inquisitor.
But it is not the thought about the fury the Empress of Orlais will one day give her that make Evelyn's heart full of heaviness, it is the memories of the burnt bodies in the slum and the cold stares of the dead servants that haunt her. Dead, lifeless, slaughtered like animals and their cries went unheard or just flat out ignored because they were born into a wrong life.
Just like the mages in the Circle back then.
It was the same, even the sticky feeling her feet had when she stepped into those puddles of blood was identical. Evelyn could kill Florianne, but that is just too quick for her. And even if she keeps the woman alive and humiliate her as a punishment, it still will not bring those innocent lives back. How many times more that has to happen before people can live the life that they deserve? How many times more does she has to contribute to the death of innocent people? How many times she had to play the Game until their dream could come true? How many times more could she bear to—
"There you are." His voice softly appears behind her back, prompting her to quickly turn around to see his face full of concern for her as he closes the only door leading to this balcony they are on.
Suddenly, the answer to the questions she had just now is so very clear as it should have been: As many times as it should take. And she will bear all the guilt she has to take along the way.
While Evelyn loses herself in her musing, Solas has come forward to cup her cheek before hugging her to himself. Something must have shown on her face because these days he does not check on her emotion as much as before in respect for her privacy.
"I'm all right," she whispers into his ear as her arms circling around him. "You are here, so I'm all right. I can get used to it."
"Just because you can do so does not mean it doesn't hurt."
Evelyn both cannot deny it and is also grateful for his presence, so she does not say anything else. Instead, she huddles closer into his embrace for a while before pulling back.
"Did you get anything else aside from the passcode?" Evelyn asks.
"I have managed to gather some decryptions to solve the main secret codes Briala often uses for her operations—This will help us greatly." Solas smirks in satisfaction.
"That was fast!" She honestly thought it would take them weeks after contacting with Briala to know more about how the woman works.
"Certain things have certain patterns, vhenan. Once you've lived long enough like me, you will know enough to see what normal people do not notice." Solas hummed. "Of course, this is just a small part of the whole puzzle, but it is a start."
"Even so, you have done a lot in such a short time." No matter how many times she witnesses it, her lover always surprises Evelyn with how fast and effective he could perform his tasks.
"Only because you kept my path clear," he gently corrects her, his fingers playing with the loose hair near her cheek. "You've done a terrific job tonight, Evelyn. Playing the Game and then finishing the physical work yourself—you wouldn't be out of place if this ball were to take place in Arlathan."
He stopped a bit before adding with a half-smirk, "It is a pity I did not get to see you tear off your previous dress though. It would have been quite a sight to see."
"That again?" Evelyn scoffs. Suddenly, the mood between them changes. "Seriously, I think you should have been the one who wore that gown. You are so in love with it that it apparently hurts you more to see me rip it than myself." Evelyn huffs.
"I love seeing you in that gown. It's not often that I get to see you in such lovely things outside the Fade and I think I deserve to enjoy it more." As he speaks, Solas quickly lifts her up to sit her on the stone rail of the balcony, making her let out a small squeak. "In fact, I am very enjoying myself right now to see you like this."
Evelyn blushes slightly but can't help feeling good about herself after his statement. Vivienne, ever the fashionable First Enchanter, has turned out to have been preparing some extra outfits for their group after their battle. In hindsight, it was a good idea of her to do so—no matter what achievement the Inquisition could make in regard to the throne, many of the Orlesian noblemen and women here are simply too obsessed with appearance to be properly interacted with unless one is dressing up to their idea of a standard.
But Vivienne has surprised Evelyn quite a bit when the woman gave her the gown to wear—the dress's design is indeed less practical than her old one with it thin light blue and silver color materials. It has cuts along the shoulders and upper arms to reveal her skin. The sleeves gather around her elbows before letting the lace flows to her mid-forearms. With all the seamlines decorated with delicate laces, this outfit should have made Evelyn look very fragile and innocent, but there is one detail on it that makes it go against the idea of a noble feminine outfit: The front opening of her high collar is big and deep enough that it completely exposes the large red, angry scar between her breasts.
For a lady to show scars in the court of the Empire is an unimaginable thing, that is the known rule for anyone with the faintest idea about noble fashion, but Vivienne had a different idea.
"This is quite unexpected," Evelyn commented as she is looking down at her chest.
"You don't like it?" asked Vivienne.
"No, surprisingly. I just thought that you would give me something more… traditional?"
"Oh, my dear girl, traditional is for the normal aristocrats." Vivienne let out her trademarks laugh. "But you are not normal—you are the Inquisitor. You may need to dress properly to attend a ball but that doesn't mean you have to make yourself blend into the crowd. You have done an exceptional job in pulling Celine to our side, but the people below the Empress need a little more persuasion."
"So, my black gown decorated with the blood of my enemies isn't enough?"
Vivienne hummed, stepping forward to tuck a red rose into Evelyn's hair before replying, "They have seen you as a noblewoman, then they saw you as a soldier and a leader; the final step is to show them that you are all."
The Enchanter then placed a finger against the top of the red scar. "You may dress in finery like them, but this scar shows that you are not the same as them. You have power and resources that you've earned with your own blood unlike most people here, that is what they need to know. They need to be reminded that you are not someone they want to fight against."
That… was something Evelyn has never thought about before, using her scars as a way to assert domination. This wound, to her, was a reminder of how dangerous her life as Fen'Harel's bondmate would be; but more than anything, it was a reminder that he loves her. Despite how unsightly it might have seemed to other people, as Evelyn has sometimes seen the ways the maids winced when they see it, she truly cherished it and was silently glad that it would never fade away.
And now, to think that it could also be used as a weapon… she liked it. She liked it a lot.
"Thank you, Vivienne." Evelyn smiled, feeling a new confidence rising in her chest.
"Of course," the First Enchanter simply said.
The gentle stroking from Solas's fingertips against her collarbone yanks Evelyn from her reminiscence. Trying to ignore the way it sends shivers down her spine, she explains, "It was Vivienne's idea—something to give a message to the noblemen and women here."
"I see," Solas says. "I think it works quite well. On my way here, I overheard people talking about dangerous you look now despite their initial impression of you."
"That's good to hear."
"But I also heard from quite a few men that they would like to get to know you better." As he says, a dark shadow looms on Solas's face and for the first time, Evelyn sees an emotion she has never seen from him before.
"Are you jealous?" She quickly grabs his hand and presses it tightly against her chest. "Solas, you know that there's no way I would ever return the advance of those men."
"I know." He glances aside, brows turning into a deep frown full of disgust. "But it does not mean that you can stop them from looking at you with those lustful stares. They were even taking bets about 'conquering' you as if you are some kind of prize or prey and not a person."
"Solas." Evelyn sighs. Gently, she turns his head back to face her with one hand. "Who cares if they harbor ill intentions toward me? It's not the first time someone has done so, and it won't be the last. Right now, all I care about is that you are looking at me. I only need to know that you want me."
To emphasize her point, she grabs the front of his shirt to pull him up and capture his lips. His tongue carries the flavor of sweet wine she had tried at the beginning of the ball, and the combination of its headiness with Solas's very own unique taste makes her feel a little lightheaded.
When they let go, it is only to breathe and even, they still have their forehead press together and their arms remain wrapping around one another.
Solas chuckles. "If this is how you react whenever I get jealous, I must do it more often."
"Even if you don't, I can do this with you anytime you get in the mood." Evelyn strokes his cheek. "But usually you don't get rile up by other people that easily even when they're attacking you directly, why are you so work up now?"
"Vhenan, I've spent thousands of years living for the sake of my people, I've given them everything I had—my power, my friends, the bonds and peaceful life that I could have. Everything I've wanted to possess was all for them. But you…"
He cupped her face with both of his hands and she finds herself unable to move under his gaze. "You are the first and only thing that I want for myself that I will never let go. Those men can set their eyes upon anything else that I have—but not you. Never you."
Evelyn wants to say something, anything in response to that heartfelt confession but before she could find it, Solas's lips have already descended upon hers once more and this time, its intensity increases tenfold.
Head spinning, toes curling and nails digging into whatever purchase they could find, Evelyn feels like her mind is being pulled away by a strong current that consumes all that stands in its path. By the time she is aware of her surroundings again, she realizes it's because Solas has left her mouth to pay attention to her neck and ear.
His left hand has somehow sneaked into the inside of her dress's opening, pawing at her breast. The rough parts of his fingertips rub against her nipple, making her breath hitches in her chest.
"Do you want me to stop?" Solas asks into her ear and Evelyn knows he will stop immediately if she says "yes". But "yes" isn't what she wants.
"Don't stop—" Evelyn does not get the chance to finish when a sharp but wonderful pain runs through the side of her neck. It will leave a mark for sure, especially when Solas's attempt to sooth it involves sucking at the bite mark immediately afterward.
Evelyn let out a laboring breath through her mouth, trying to keep her head tilt aside so her bondmate can focus on his task. It feels wonderful, and a more rational part of her mind has an inkling that if she continues to let him do this, things will escalate even more. The balcony they are on doesn't have any window—the only exist is that door but she did notice Solas had placed a temporary seal spell on the lock when he was closing it. If anyone wants to go out here, the two of them would notice right away, but it is still risky for them to do this.
And yet…
"More." She whispers, pulling at his shoulder.
Solas complies. He moves her around so she is now leaning against a tall post of the balcony rail, at a perfect height for his mouth to kiss her and his hand sneaking under her dress to stroke the bare skin of her thigh.
Evelyn's ears could only hear the sounds that her lover makes. The music and voices of people on the other side of the wall have long faded into white noises. Her eyes can only focus on her bondmate as everything else becomes blurry like they are being covered by a layer of mist.
Solas has, at some points, loosened up the front of her top, giving himself more access to her breasts and he certainly doesn't waste time to enjoy them. Rubbing, nuzzling, sucking, biting, he feasts upon her hungrily. His hand has moved up to rubbing against her groin through the thin fabric of her small but he doesn't make any attempt of going in like he usually does.
For a while, her bondmate keeps her on that near edge of pleasure, enough to make her dizzy but not quite to reach there. Pleasure is running through her and yet she is empty at the same time.
"Solas, more, please. I need you." She pleads, trying to edge him on by rubbing a certain spot on the back of his ears, knowing that it will make him lost control.
"Are you sure?" Solas asks and Evelyn could hear a subdued constrain in his otherwise normal tone.
"Of course, I am!" She raises her voice, feeling a bit annoyed that he had taken thing this far and now asking her this.
"Even if there is someone who is watching us right now? In particular, that man on that balcony over there?"
Suddenly, Evelyn is very aware of her surrounding now.
"What?" She almost turns around by reflex but Solas stops her.
"Now, don't do that, vhenan. You don't want him to see your face, do you?"
"How long has he been there?" Evelyn speaks through her gritted teeth. Her voice automatically comes out much quieter despite the fact that she knows that the nearest balcony should be over a couple of meters away from here.
"Long enough for him to probably assume that we will do more than just kissing," Solas says nonchalantly, his eyes flicker toward the direction of that man before returning to her. "He looks very interested in our activity, and very impatient right now."
"And you didn't think it was important to tell me earlier?" Evelyn fumes, the 'rather than let me get this high only to cut me off like this' is left unsaid.
"This is not the first time I make a show for others to see, plus the facts that he cannot see your face or that I thought you wouldn't let things go this far," Solas explains lightly but then his face turns serious. "If you are uncomfortable, we can stop here. We have the rest of the night in our room so it's not like we have to get it done here."
As he speaks, his left hand is stroking her back in a comfortable gesture while his right one laces its fingers with her left's. Well, perhaps his actions are making her feel too comfortable because that little fire in her lower stomach is making it existent known to her once more.
But if that man stays too long and realizes who they are, if anyone comes through that door and see them, it could lead to trouble down the line…
"It's okay. I suppose we should get out of here now." Solas's sigh makes her look up to see his gentle, understanding smile. "I shouldn't have risked the Inquisition's reputation. And I am sorry for making you uncomfortable like that."
He takes her hand to pull her toward the door.
But she stops him by standing still on her spot without letting his hand go.
"Evelyn?"
How could she let her fear disappointed him like that? Sure, they could give up a few moments of intimation to avoid the gossiping ears around them but… isn't doing it the same as acknowledging their relationship is something shameful that should be hidden away?
She is not ashamed of him. Never him.
"Stay." Her voice is small at first but the solid feeling of his warm hand in hers gives her more confidence as she says her words, "Stay with me. Here."
"Are you sure? If someone sees, they will—"
She doesn't let him finish. By pulling him down for a demanding kiss, Evelyn has effectively cut off any argument Solas could have and more. He had let out a grunt of surprise at first, but now he is so compliant in her embrace and tries to return her kiss with an even greater enthusiasm than before.
When they let go of each other's mouth to catch their breath, there is a mischievous twinkle in his eyes that make her feel so giggly despite the knowledge that they currently have an uninvited audience.
"That was more enthusiastic than I expected." Solas chuckled, hugging her to himself again. "But are you sure? I don't want us to go through this and then having you beat yourself over it afterward out of regret."
It is not "having you blame it" but "having you beat yourself over it"—as always, he is still more concerned about her hurting herself than what she would feel toward him. How could she do any less for her Wolf?
"If anyone sees us, it would only a minor scandal compare to what we had faced before." Evelyn caresses Solas's cheeks with her thumbs. "I'm more concerned if you're okay with this, having an extra viewer, I mean? Those nobles could try to give you a hard time if they all know."
"Oh, vhenan, it was me who initiated this in the first place and now you are asking if I care about them?" Solas smirks. "Let me say this clear to you—all I care about is your consent. As long as you are happy, I don't care what others think."
His words resonant through her, giving her even more courage to push her worry to a side. Licking her lips and feeling that giddy excitement from preparing to do something so new and forbidden, Evelyn pushes herself against Solas.
"Then… let me take care of you. I have promised to give you rewards before if you behave and not playing tricks on people tonight, have I not?" The words come out so in a low, husky tone—so different from what her normal self's behavior that and yet aside from a slight hotness on her cheek, she doesn't really feel the urge to take it back or stammering her speech to try to excuse it.
Instead, Evelyn slides her hand from Solas's chest down to his lower stomach, deliberately stops just above the very obvious budge stranding against the inside of his trousers.
In a flash, Evelyn finds herself being pushed against the rail post like before with Solas's mouth once against devouring her. His hand roaming all over her body before reaching the back of her thighs.
Effortlessly, her bondmate lifts her up and basically have her hover between him and the rail post. Even if at least now she has somewhat gotten used to being lifted around by him, Evelyn still can't help but marvel at his strength and the way he could carry her so easily without breaking a sweat—just like now, when he is holding her against the post with one hand while his other one working to untie the strings of her small.
Impatient and trying to be helpful, she fumbles with her own task of undoing the hidden buttons of his pants. Unlike him, her hand is clumsy both from inexperience and excitement so it takes her longer to do it—with her Wolf waiting so patiently for her after he had already discarded her smalls to aside.
(A03)
(A03)
(A03)
Since Solas needs to check his appearance more than Evelyn because her long gown can hide away the mess until they return to their room while his pants cannot, Evelyn hands out a handkerchief from her hidden pocket to Solas to clean himself up while she is retrieving her discarded small from the ground.
Taking a long look at the piece of underclothes while feeling the still very apparent wetness between her legs, Evelyn concludes that there is no point to put the thing on only for it to be taken off again once they reach their room. After all, even if she feels very satisfied right now, with the thrill he has installed in her, the thought of them enjoying each other one more time still sends a flash of heat down her lower stomach.
Tucking away her small into the empty pocket, Evelyn glances at Solas who shoots back a smirk with half-lidded eyes at her.
Yes, one time just isn't enough. Not when a sense of longing and disappointment runs through her as she realizes how empty she is without him. Looking at him, she can see the mischievous glint in his eyes and a promise for something more.
Suddenly remembers the man who is watching them, Evelyn's usual curiosity rises up to the surface again. She wants to see who has seen her lovemaking with Solas, wants to know what is his expression right now after everything. And simply, she just wants to know.
At once, she turns around to find that man.
But there is no one anywhere. All the balconies are empty.
Has that man left already? But if he did, Solas would have told her immediately instead of making her worry the whole time. Unless…
Evelyn looks back to her bondmate with narrowed eyes.
He is grinning, with teeth and all. "I would never endanger you, vhenan. Not without telling you everything first before we even start anything."
Teeth grinding, she lands her fists on his chest. "You jerk! How could you trick me like that? I was so worried that you could get into troubles!"
He even has the nerves to laugh, catching her swinging hands with ease. "I'm so sorry, emma lath. But I did make you forget, did I not? Have you feel better now?"
That makes her stop, and the gears in her head start spinning.
Forget? Feeling better? Oh…
So that is why he created this elaborate prank? Solas has seen her being so upset after everything happened tonight that he used sex to make her relax. He has made her so focus on being caught in a little sex scandal to help her forget about the servants' deaths and everything else.
The realization makes her anger defuse rapidly, but instead of feeling a full relief and joy, Evelyn finds herself feeling… disappointed.
There was no one watching them. No one to see that she has no shame about Solas. No one outside the Inquisition to know that she truly loves and cherishes—that this is not a game like the ones the nobles here play with the elven servants to pass the time.
Feeling all energy leaving her body, Evelyn's arms fall to her sides. She leans forward bonelessly, pressing her face against Solas's chest.
"You are mean. So mean…" she moans with her half-muffed voice. "I was so hoping—"
Face reddens, she cannot finish, leaving Solas pulls her back to look at her. "What's wrong, Evelyn? You were what?" His face is full of concern now, she can even feel a slight panic from his soul.
Swallowing her embarrassment, Evelyn steps back, takes a deep breath and then blurts out in one go, "I want that man and everyone else see us making love! I am not ashamed of you or us and if I have to show the world what I do in bed to prove that then so be it! The people here think that you are just a game to me and I won't allow that—I love you and I won't let anyone think otherwise!
Her whole body feels like it's burning now. She cannot look at him in the eyes so she glues her gaze to the floor instead. Lips pressed into a thin line. Her finger fiddle relentlessly with the thin outer layer of her dress, probably going to tear a couple of holes in it soon.
Solas must be thinking that she is so childish to feel the need to prove her love for him like this, but Evelyn can't help it. She is who she is and she cannot lie to her feeling or get rid of her concern about their surrounding, after all.
But Solas does not laugh, instead, he just comes over to slowly embrace her, his arms gradually tighten around her like a pair of strong vices, as if he wants to make sure he will never let her go afterward.
"Thank you, Evelyn," Solas murmurs. "Thank you for loving me. I am so sorry I caused you such distress."
He pulls back to press his forehead against hers before sighing. "I was so short-sighted that I just focused on relieving your current worry without thinking that it could potentially cause you a different trouble. I will not do it again."
Knowing how Solas is, Evelyn immediately grabs his face to force him to look straight into her eyes. "Stop that trend of thought right now. Do not regret that you were trying to make me happy. I was being the usual me while you were just being the usual you. It is just how we are and I love you for that."
Touches her lips to Solas's in a sweet, chaste kiss, she smiles. "Thank you for trying so hard to help me. I feel much better now."
And then her smile turns wicked. "In fact, I feel so much better that I think we should do something adventurous like this more often."
That makes Solas grin, his thumb stroking her lower lip as he says in a husky voice, "As you wish, vhenan."
A cold wind soon comes over to make her shudder, knowing that it is time for them to return to their room now, Solas quickly helps Evelyn fix her clothes and hair to a more presentable state before opening the door.
They come inside with her arm wraps around his, their fingers entwine and the murmurs of the crowd signal that their action does not go unnoticed.
Evelyn is smiling now. If only those people know what is running down her legs now or see the bite marks Solas has left on her neck and breasts.
But then again, she could safely assume that people will all know later when the elven servants tell them. After all, the sense of smell of an elf is far superior and from the look of the servants' faces, they all must know what has just happened between Solas and her.
Ah, she cannot wait to see the look on their faces tomorrow, when they help her bathe and dress—with Solas also presents and helps—for the dinner with the Empress's court.
They will see all the marks that Solas will leave on her entire body tonight. Marks to show that he is a very willing and possessive partner. Marks to show that he is not afraid to let the world know that she is his just as much as he is hers.
She simply cannot wait to show them all.