Strange but Familiar Territory

He was tired. There was no easy way to say it. He was bone tired, but he couldn't let up. He had to keep going if he was going to find his brother and free him from a backstabbing archangel.

Sam sighed heavily as he took stock of the day that just happened. It was like any other day, but it felt heavier. It was heavier in that Dean wasn't there in the fight with him because out of desperation, he said yes to Michael and now Michael was riding free reign on him. It was heavy because out of desperation, the baby goddess/angel he helped raise gave his mate a power boost that now scared the crap out her and she felt she owed it to him to find Dean. It was heavy because he was doing everything in his power to do all that and be father to his daughter. It was exhausting.

His mom meant well, trying to get him to take a break. How could he? His people were from a world that didn't have computers or know anything about the technology there. They were scared about the fact that he had things that could kill you wandering in and out of the bunker despite the fact that they had proven themselves. He was worried about Jack who wasn't taking the loss of his powers or Angela very well. Hibah helped a little, but Jack was still suffering. He was running full throttle and well aware that he was running on fumes.

It wasn't just looking for Dean. It was also dealing with the fact that he had the devil, no Nick in the bunker. It had been discovered that Lucifer was dead but Nick was very much alive and was remembering things. It was hard on Sam because Nick's face was whom he associated with Lucifer. The devil had tortured him in hell and done unspeakable things to his mate. It was a major resetting of the mental gears.

Hibah was another piece. Sam couldn't really be mad at her for what she had done. She was trying to help the people that mattered the most to her. The girl knew who her birth parents were, but she always considered him, Angela and Dean her family. She responded as they would and if that didn't make her a Winchester… He just had a hard time dealing with the fact that she was there in the thick of it. It wasn't that he didn't want her there. It was the parent in him and he really didn't know how to connect with her. True they had encountered each other before since she helped him find Angela and helped out on other things, but he still saw her as the little girl he knew. At least he understood where his mother was coming from.

Mary meant well and she did lay it on him about staying positive. Sam was just tired. Tired that it never seemed that they could truly catch a break. He just wanted to be a good father to Jess and he knew he was lacking in that area currently. Kate laid that one on him since she volunteered to be the bunker's housekeeper and watch Jess. And she was doing this while raising Ayana since Kesset was on duty looking for Dean and helping out. It really had him think if this was what Angela worried about when she used to lead armies and what she worried about when they were starting their family.

Sam could admit that he was glad that he had Hibah there. As much as he worried like a parent, he knew she could handle herself and she didn't have to use her abilities. He did make use of it though and had her go in with him when he met the demon that thought it would be a good idea to use Castiel as bait and make a deal. At least he didn't have to use Angela's name to strike fear into the other demons. They were scared of him. Handy thing a little reputation could be.

Things didn't go all as well though. It had probably been foolish for him to let Jack come along, but he understood the kid's need to feel useful since he felt useless without his powers. Jack got hurt and now felt worse than ever. Sam didn't have to hear the conversation Jack had with Castiel. He could feel it. He knew that Jack was trying to prove something and he was struggling to understand why Angela wasn't with them now.

Jess didn't seem to have that much of a problem. Yes, she knew her mother wasn't there and she missed her uncle, but she was happy to have her father there. Sam knew that Kate didn't like he was running on empty and hadn't spent a whole lot of time with his daughter lately. He just felt like he was being pulled in so many directions and he was struggling to keep it all from breaking.

It was mental anguish and dwelt heavily on his mind when he walked into his room that night. He went to check on Jess to make sure she was sleeping comfortably before he went to bed. Then he would get up and do it all over again. And maybe he would consider a few changes.

He threw his keys onto the desk and sighed heavily from the tiredness. He contemplated just falling onto his bed as is. He was that tired and he doubted sleep would give him the respite he needed. Still… He leaned heavily on the desk as he pulled his phone out and tossed it onto the surface. It was then he felt a familiar warmth wrap around from behind and he closed his eyes and breathed, "I didn't think you'd come."

"I didn't want Atlanta to end."

Sam sighed and smiled tiredly when he turned to face the one person that made it all bearable. Sitting on the desk allowed him to pull her into his arms and just hold her and he replied softly, "Chasing fruitless leads, long hours of research… just the way I want it, Angie." He closed his eyes as he took a deep breath of her scent.

Angela took the opportunity to hug and snuggle into his warmth. She wasn't hesitant about breathing in Sam's scent as he wasn't about doing the same with her. Feeling calm, she said, "I miss you."

"You're here now as you have been every few nights," Sam pointed out.

Secrets were another thing wearing him down. He knew that Angela would come home. He had faith in her and she did. The thing was that she needed to keep going. She was trying to track down Dean and was sending home leads. It was why he went to Atlanta. She found a promising lead, sent word and he came. It turned out to be nothing but still…

It was dumb keeping this a secret since there were people who would benefit seeing her even if it was only a brief respite. Yet it was twofold. She didn't know about Nick yet and Sam wasn't even sure how to tell her. She held onto grudges longer than he and Dean put together especially if it involved her family. He didn't know how she would react and we wasn't sure if he could stop her if she reacted. It was unknown territory after what Hibah did and he would have preferred to do the one step at a time thing.

At least she knew about that. The blow was softened since Angela knew what grace felt like and made it easier to digest. And she took his advice to let them help. She didn't stay away. Being there made him hug her tighter and search for her lips to plant a kiss. "Angie…"

Angela accepted the kiss and caressed his head, running her fingers through his hair. She broke it and turned it into a nuzzle. "I know," she whispered. "I still miss you. Il mio curore."

Sam hummed as he held her, not wanting to let go. "I love you." He grinned and teased, "To the stars and back."

"Tease," she retorted playfully.

Sam knew she could see his tiredness and no doubt blaming herself as she caressed his locks. It was clear when she said, "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. This is new for all of us and I get why you want to be cautious."

"I hate being away from my family, but I am scared Sam." Angela looked at him with the worry clear in her eyes. "I am terrified of what this means. I know I'm no angel but some of things I learned and can do…"

Sam reached up and stroked her cheek. "You're still you," he affirmed. It wasn't just empty words. He meant it with all of his heart. "You are still you, Angie. Always will be. I really want you here, at home with me, but… you're helping with finding Dean. That's a lot and… it means a lot."

"Trying to be like me."

"I'm a selfish bastard."

It was an old argument and one that turned into playful seriousness. Angela looked at Sam as she brushed his cheek with her fingers. "And I'm the most selfish of us all," she countered.

"Still love you."

It caused Angela to smile and lean forward to bury her head in his chest. Sam just sat there holding her. He treasured these moments and was why he wasn't collapsing just yet. Sometimes he just wanted to keep her there and never let go.

"I can't stay away anymore, Sam. I know Jack is hurting, Hibah feels lost and Jess… I just want to hold my baby."

Sam processed what she was saying, "So, this means?"

"I'm staying. I'm back. I'm home."

It was what Sam wanted. True there were some complications, but they would figure it out. Right now, he was just happy. Happier than he had been in a while. He started kissing Angela feverishly and she returned it. He didn't get very far when his phone buzzed. He sighed in annoyance and rolled his eyes slightly.

"Duty calls."

"Don't think so," Sam replied as he checked to see that there was no ID on the caller. He held onto Angela by leaving his hand on her hip and answered. He was surprised at who was on the other end, "Jo?"

We've got a problem.

A/N: Sam is trying to keep it together and gets some respite but looks like it has to take a back seat. Tag to Stranger in a Strange Land.