Chapter 2, FINALLY. I'll be sure to update again quickly since this one is kind of short. Let me know what you think!
- - -
After spending the morning avoiding Tom and B'Elanna, Janeway finally escaped to Chakotay.
She half expected him to bring Seven, but at the same time, she knew Chakotay understood her need for privacy.
"When would you like to have the funeral?" he asked, unsure of her emotional stability.
"Soon. I want it all over and done with. I want to help Phoebe get back on her feet. It isn't fair that she's had to front the cost for all the medical bills," Janeway said.
"You know, I have seven years worth of a paycheck headed my way, so if you ever…" she cut him off mid sentence.
"Don't, Chakotay. I don't need your help, and I don't need your sympathy." She paused. "Let's talk about something else. How are things with you and Seven?"
Janeway, never one to beat around the bush, struck directly at the reason why she wanted to meet with her first officer.
"I guess news travels fast," he said, blushing. "Kathryn, I hope you know I didn't plan this. It just, well, happened. I can't help my feelings."
"I know, I understand," she said, giving him her best impression of a smile.
Chakotay glanced at the floor, pausing for what seemed like an eternity.
"I think I want to ask her to marry me," he said, raising his eyes to meet hers.
Janeway did her best to remain straight faced, while inwardly she fought the urge to throw up. Since when had she become so driven by emotion?
"But I need to check something first…I need… I need to know…" Chakotay stuttered.
"You need to know what? That you have my blessing?" she responded, not intending to sound as bitter as she did.
"No," he said, "I need to know that I'll never be with you."
Completely taken aback, Janeway fought the sharp response she had prepared. This was exactly what she wanted to hear, and at the same time, completely disgusting to her.
"Chakotay, I have always known you to be infinitely loyal and trusting. Why would you ever ask me anything like that? How could you do that to Seven?" Janeway honestly wondered why he chose this moment to bring up such a question.
"It's not fair to ask for her hand when I'm in love with some else…" he said, trailing off.
"Chakotay, don't do this now," she responded.
"No, Kathryn, let me finish. You know I love you. And you know I have loved you for some time. You told me on Voyager that we couldn't be together, and I respected you for that. But now we're home, and there is nothing stopping you from being with me. If your feelings have changed, if you don't want me anymore, let me know – and I'll be out of your life forever," he said, the words strained.
Janeway, realizing what was before her, hesitated before responding.
In that brief moment, Chakotay reasoned this hesitation to be a declaration of love.
Before she could protest, he leaned across the table, took her face in his hands, and kissed her.
When he parted his lips from hers, Janeway could feel his hot breath on her face.
"Not here, Chakotay. Not now," she whispered, confused as to whether she should be angry or excited.
"Why not? It has been seven years. I deserve to know," he said, angrily pulling away.
"Because I need to figure some things out. I need to get my mother buried," she said, guilting him into holding off on his pursuit.
"Fine, Kathryn. But you should know that I'm not giving up. Not after all we've been through," he said.
"Then you need to let Seven know. It is cruel what you are doing to her. I really think you need to take a good look in the mirror, and see if it's worth breaking her heart over some irrational feelings for me," Janeway said, once again disgusted by the triangle she had suddenly and irrevocably entered into.
"Irrational? I would die for you, Kathryn. I have made my feelings very clear to you," he said, taken aback by her comment.
"Then let Seven know! How dare you use her simply as an intermediary! She is fragile Chakotay, and I'm frankly disgusted that – "
"I'm not using her," he interrupted, "I genuinely care for her. But she isn't you, Kathryn…" he trailed off.
By now their scuffle had begun to attract attention, and as soon as the public realized them to be the captain and commander of Voyager, the conversation was over.
"I'm leaving, Chakotay, before this turns into a mad house" she said. "I'll see you at the funeral, if you chose to be there."
"Kathryn, you know I would never…"
But she was already gone.
- - -
Back at the Paris', B'Elanna was taking a nap while Tom watched the baby.
"You have perfect timing," Tom said, "Miral just fell asleep," showing her the sleeping baby in his arms.
As Janeway walked into the kitchen, Tom noticed the air of melancholy that followed her around the room. He laid Miral in her crib, and followed her.
"Ok, Captain, what's up," he asked, as if she were hiding some big secret.
"Nothing really, Tom. Chakotay was just a little difficult at lunch. And on top of all the debriefings and my mother dying, I'm just a little tired," she responded.
"You have the right to be. I'd be pretty damned tired after captaining a ship for seven years, lost in the middle of the Delta quadrant. I'm going to grab some food, and veg out on the couch – you should join me," Tom said.
"That sounds absolutely delightful. Let me replicate some coffee and I'll be right out," she said.
"You know, if you aren't careful, that stuff will kill you," he said, sitting down on the couch and motioning her to join him.
"Tom, you forget you are talking to the woman that asked to be assimilated," she said, smirking.
He laughed loudly, before catching himself, gesturing to the room were Miral was asleep.
"You know, you're pretty funny, Captain. I never really noticed it that much when we were on Voyager. You were always very serious and driven."
Janeway smiled half heartedly; her run in with Chakotay was still in the back of her mind.
Tom paused, and looked her in the face before saying, "Permission to speak freely, ma'am?"
"Of course, Tom," she responded.
"Ok good, because what the hell did Chakotay say to you? You were positively giddy this morning – so it can't just be your mother. So spill it," he said.
"Tom, the only reason I was giddy was because your father embarrassed me over our accidental sleeping arrangements," she said, holding back a smile.
"Accidental, Captain? Here I've been thinking all day that you were putting some moves on me," he said, laughing.
"Oh, please Tom, I'm old enough to be your mother."
"I guess that just makes you a cougar!" he said, laughing harder.
"A what?" Janeway asked, completely taken aback by such a term.
"It's an old 21st century term that means…well…" Tom stuttered, unsure how to proceed.
"Now I'm insulted, Tom!" she said, jokingly, punching him lightly on the shoulder.
"Ow!" he screamed in mock-agony, "I can't move my shoulder!"
Tom then returned the favor, hitting Janeway lightly.
"Ow!" she responding, now laughing, "you just hit a starship Captain!" she said, trying to make a serious face, among all the laughter.
Her acting ability caught Tom off guard, and he reached over and starting rubbing the spot where he hit her.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you," he said. "Come here. I guess I don't know my own strength," he laughed, kissing his bicep before resuming rubbing her shoulders.
"Mhmm. Normally I would tell you to stop, but I'm just going to pretend I'm not your captain for five minutes. This is too good to pass up," she said, laughing.
"You know, Captain, there was a time when I would have killed for you to let me touch you like this."
"What? Tom, what are you talking about?"
Tom laughed, more out of his own offense than anything else.
"You remember when we first met? In this house," he asked.
"Of course, Tom. You were just a boy. I don't think you were even in the Academy yet," she responded.
"No, I was…It was my second year, I think. And you had been freshly promoted to lieutenant. My father had invited you over for a celebratory dinner."
Janeway nodded along with Tom as he continued to massage her shoulders.
"And if I remember correctly," she said, "You walked in right in the middle of dinner as drunk as can be," she said, laughing.
"Yeah, I wasn't allowed to leave the house for a week. But I was ok with that, because I got to spend time with you and Dad. And God, were you beautiful."
Janeway felt herself blush.
"Oh, Tom. I never knew. I always thought you hated me for taking up so much of your father's time."
"Oh, I did," Tom said, laughing. "But that didn't mean I wasn't madly in love with you. I mean, you really were beautiful." He paused. "And you still are."
Janeway gentled shrugged his hands off her shoulders and stood up from the couch.
"I'm sorry, Captain. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. I was just reminiscing. I'm happily married man, and you know that," he said, smiling.
"Oh it is quite alright, Tom. I was just thinking of all the reports I need to catch up on. I'll see you later."
She smiled before leaving the room. As she left, the door to Tom's bedroom opened, and B'Elanna walked out.
"What was that little stunt about?" she asked, obviously upset.
"What do you mean, B'Elanna?"
"You shouldn't go around telling other women they are beautiful, Tom. I thought this playboy faze was over. I don't know what has gotten into you since we've gotten back to Earth, but it is rather irritating."
"B'Elanna," Tom begged, "I was just talking about something that happened when we were kids, there is no need to overreact."
"Overreact?!" she said, heatedly, "I don't think its right that you would say that to anyone, regardless. Especially not to Janeway."
"What's that supposed to mean?" he responded, matching her tone.
"You know what I mean, Tom," she said, before leaving the room.